Prisoner
by JigokuShoujosRevenge
Summary: Tale of a prisoner in Otokagure and how she now lives and works for Orochimaru. Slowly he begins to fall for her. Too bad he doesn't realize this prisoner is haunted by so many ghosts and demons from her past... Horror/Romance.
1. Prisoner

Hayashi Kiki Mizuka couldn't remember, meaning whatever happened was something bad. That much was obvious, especially since pain coursed throughout her entire body and the coppery taste of blood stained her mouth. Stupidly attempting to at least sit up, she fell over cringing in at the stinging sensation. Taking sharp breaths, she focused her eyes and looked around the best she could. It was a dungeon with a cold floor and moist walls. People were obviously dying: they were coughing up blood or just plain weezing like they were just about to fall over any second. She cringed again but not in pain. Death always bothered her whether it wasa friend, family, or enemy in which case was why she became a medical koinichi.

Death... That word brought back a sudden rush of memories.

_There were screams. She almost didn't notice since she was lost in her own world centered around her own personal dillema: her arranged marriage. She was adopted into a clan that arranged marriages. She was already in a beautiful wedding kimono - purple lined with green, swirls of flowers sewed in gold threading from the bottom growing to the top. Her hair was combed out. Her sandals were somewhat high and uncomfortable. They dressed her up like a plastic barbie. She personally hated the outfit but everyone said it looked beautiful on her so it stayed as is. _

_She had black hair and glittering black eyes. She had a well sized bust and a perfect figure. She had dainty feet with long slender arms and legs. And secretly she had black dog ears which she kept secret for obvious reasons. Usually she hid them under hats, bows, and ribbons. This was because she was a hanyou (_yes like inuyasha)_. Right now it was her cycle to be a human which was perfect since nothing was covering her head. The ceremony had already started but she didn't cared. She wanted to skip the whole damn thing._

_They told her she had a calm and philisophical (actually they told her she over thought things) personality. Sometimes she could even look into a person's soul and automatically know them as if they were friends from birth. That ability made it easier to get along with which made her a desirable women. Which is why she was being treated like a prostitute. Sold off to the highest bidder. (Ones who could raise my family's prestige.)_

_Upon hearing the screaming, she woke up from her thoughts and ran outside hoping to help, thinking somebody just cut themselves and those annoyingly foolish women were just reacting to the blood, but no. It was an invasion. People were being relentlessly cut down and murdered. Begging from whimpering townsfolk blanketed the area. Both kinds: begging to be spared and begging to have their misery ended. Her eyes widened as Sound shinobi circled her. No weapons. No jutsus that wouldn't cause fatal wounds especially with her chakra. Either kill or be killed. A few handsigns and she summoned Inugami, a demon hellhound. He gave a crooked smile, licked his lips,"Heh, heh. It's been awhile since you last fed me..." Jumping into action he tore apart the ninja, devouring them. Alive. Screaming erupted from the sadstic shinobi. Ironic to own such a beast yet hate the blood and death. An amused snicker sounded behind her and it went dark._

Slowly she composed herself and began to heal her wounds. Scraping metal on the stone floor echoed loudly. Murmuring drunken slurrs were barely within hearing range, but the constant pleads to be helped or released made it harder to hear. She made out something like,"We have new toys to play with" or "Which one?" and "Hey, pretty babe!". The pitter-patter of footsteps fell a foot short from her.

"Heya looka 'er she 'eems funnn and shez hurled herself sooooooo nones gottsa notissss"

I was revolted. The one perk to being captured was getting out of that Kami-sama forsaken marriage. I don't, didn't, and never will care for that damned family or husband. I won't say I hated my village. The Village Hidden by Wolves was a wonderful, peaceful, serene, friendly place. As my head jerked up due to the hand entangled in my hair I stared trying to use my ability to know the person. Staring at him with dull eyes I casually asked,"Do you still have nightmares of your drunk step-father forcing you under him? Is that where you learned to treat prisoners?"

I honestly did expect for me to get smashed into the wall. "Reap what you sow. Your sins will drown you one day. Why, now how can you give people the hell you experienced so long ago?" I looked up at him with pitying eyes.

A sober voice called out,"What the fuck are you doing? These prisoners are to be interragated before harmed or mentally damaged any more than they are." Walking forward he grabbed the drunk and then me "Drunky gets punished while prisoner gets interragated." After finishing his baby talk, he gave a malicous smirk.

Trailing down a twisting maze of corridors "drunky" was tossed in a room drenched with the scent of blood. For 13 more minutes I walked silently as he dragged me to a room at the end of the hall. "Here you go," he huffed, pushing me through the door. Falling indignantly flat on my face, I groaned.

"My, my. For someone who heals themsevles, they are quite weak in the legs." I stared at the face, reconizing the voice as the one who knocked me unconcious. Oh crap... Ebony mixed with ivory and golden snake-like eyes. Snakes... I hate/fear/have a horrible phobia of snakes. Once when I was little I fell into a snake's den and almost died 'cause of the venom. He motioned to the chair and I stared trying not to crawl into the corner and screech for help."Well? Can you speak? I know you can walk otherwise you wouldn't have gotten here."His voice dripped with patronizing annoyance.

I stood up, never moving my eyes mind you, and sat on the chair. I finally made the choice to close my eyes and pretend to be talking with my brother Kouga (yeah like inuyasha).

"What's your name?" His voice was nothing like Kouga's.

"Hayashi."

"Funny. Unless my ears decieved me, I heard them call you Kiki."

"Kiki is a nickname. For the kanji "ki". Two "ki's" put together is pronounced Hayashi. Call me Hayashi." Damn, I was too nervous.

"I am aware of my own language's properties." He didn't snap at me. I would have thought he would be more . . . testy. "Why are your eyes closed?"

"Your appearance scares me. Snakes aren't exactly my favorite animals."

This made him smirk."Open your eyes and keep them open."

"Hai." I opened my eyes but looked down, my fists clenching my torn,ragged kimono.

"Try looking up."

"Iie." I shook my head in case he misheard me.

Sneering, he kicked me in the gut hard."You shouldn't be so insolent. That will certainly get you killed."

"Does it really matter? I will most likely die soon anyway. Why go down a whimpering, mindless slave? I might as well preserve what dignity I have left."

He smiled a sadistic grin. He had fangs. "Do you have any abilties or should I say what do you specialize in?"

"Medicine."

"Hmmm. . . Then you have use therefore there's no reason to kill you."

"Do you have any Kekkei Genkai?"

". . .Iie"

"Why so hesitant?"

2 hours til' the cycle finished. . . "Gomenasai. I didn't mean to be."

His eyes narrowed but not in anger or annoyance. It felt like he was studying me. He swept his eyes across my body. He snickered, trying to taunt me and get a rise out. "I'm sorry. It seems I may have ruined your special day. Tell me was that shoulder-lengthed, brown-haired man with the black satin yukata your husband?"

"Probably." What did he look like again?

"Probably? Well he's dead now but I doubt you care that much."

". . .It was arranged. I had no say in the matter"

"Poor you. . ." He crooned softly, taking her face in his hand. When he began caressing, her face she jerked away. "You seem so firey and defiant. I'll have to fix that immediately."

I remember my head being bashed against the wall and then I woke up in the hospital. When he decided to visit me, I could tell he was utterly amused. He traced his hand around my bandages. I flinched, but it was barely noticeable. My gut said he saw.

"Ki-"

"Hayashi."

"Ahh. Don't you like me? That hurts."

"No, it doesn't. You're a sadistic, heartless bastard."

"Hmm. . .Well you do have a point, but not the _current _point. I have a small mission for you to do later. Til' then you can just go rest up and relax in my library."

I blinked. "I am not loyal to you, nor do I plan to work for you."

"Why do you have a death wish?"

"I am merely stating the truth."

"Well I have means to convince you. . ."

"I don't really respond to torture."

"Does the name Iro Mizuka sound at all familiar?"

She didn't like where this was going. Iro was an orphan she found and raised as her son. He had black hair that partially covered his left side of the face. His hair dropped down to his chin. The exposed portion of his face showed somewhat pale skin and dark green eyes. He usually wore black. "Doushite, hito-san?"

Swiftly he back handed her. "I am to be addressed as Orochimaru-sama and currently we have him under our wing safe and not harmed at all, but that can easily change."

"Let me see him."

"You shouldn't demand."

"Let me see him. I can't trust a snake."

"Heh, heh. I suppose I could bring him here. . ."

"If what you say is true, then I will follow you, on the condition that Iro stays me."

"You have no say in this matter. You shouldn't keep making demands."

"Like I said, I can't trust you. And even if I was disloyal you would probably take pleasure of killing him in front of me."

"All to true. . ."

**Orochimaru's POV:**

Orochimaru was having fun. It had been a while since someone stood up to him or even bothered to talk back. But she wouldn't ever look at him, which annoyed him to no end. But that was one of the many things they would have to work on. He had never met anyone so calm and straightfoward. He automatically knew she wasn't lying when she spoke, but that hollow voice of hers was the second thing on the Annoying List. That monotonous voice and those empty eyes. . . They should be either be drowning in fear or hold some respect and acknowledgement as to where her place was.

Staring at a clock, he noted it was already 8:45 pm. He should go check on Kiki, oh wait, _Hayashi-kun. _He began walking down the corridor when he heard a beautiful voice singing a song he couldn't recognize:

_To get my happiness I have done everything _

_but have done nothing to be blamed or accused of_

_The sounds of footsteps became louder every day_

_then I noticed the fact there was no time_

_I want a believer in life to be myself always_

_and was asking whether I will be alive_

_Give me a reason why or why not to adopt in this way_

_or judge me to be guilty of so many incurable sins_

_Tell me why or why not complaining way too much_

_maybe I overlooked something fatal for me_

He stood outside the door as the music stopped. Pushing the door open, he asked mockingly,"Why stop singing? Please don't tell me it was on my account."

She stared at him and he felt it as it bore through him. "Yes. Somewhat. I don't want to sing to or around you. Besides I have no reason to sing anymore." His eyes drifted alongside hers to a bundle buried in her lap. Iro was sleeping soundly.

"How cute. . . Too bad the mission starts now. You are assigned to the patient Kimimaro Kaguya. You start immediately so I will lead you there."

**Kiki's POV:**

It smelled of decay and death while a lively corpse lay in bed coughing and convulsing. I stared for a second, fiddling a rectangular red stone (kinda like FMA philosophers stones) that I wore around my neck and jumped into action without a given order. I quickly stablized him and analyzed his lungs for the problem: A rare type of tuberculosis ate away at his lungs by killing white blood cells and leaving it succeptable to bacteria and infection. It was easy for me to figure out because of an outbreak that had occurred in my village a few years back. It was supposed to be contageous, but the previous medic actually did some good. The overall analysis: This was treatable. Kimimaro, my first mission in Otokagure, would be live longer.

**3 hours later**

It didn't seem fair. Reluctant or not I shouldn't have to keep wearing this wedding kimono. It's caked with blood, mud, and practically in shreds (not to mention the memories it held). Orochimaru could afford to give me the luxury clothes. Not for my sake, but for Kimimaro's. All kinds of bacteria and germs on my tattered clothes could rub off and worsen him especially since his immune system wasn't in tip-top shape yet. Kimimaro, though getting better, kept coughing up blood every once in a while (which of course splattered on me). He was unconcious and only barely woke up every so often too groggy to know what was going on. He was completely stable and even though that was good, it meant I helped Orochimaru. I wished I at least was given proper working conditions. It would make me feel less like a prisoner. Ignorance is the ultimate bliss.

I stared at Kimimaro, something seemed odd. I wasn't told much except his medical history. But he had a weird aura about him which made me somewhat nervous. I heard footsteps closing in on the door and I realized something: my ears. The cycle was finished and now I wore dog ears. I ripped my kimono towards the bottom and made a hairband and quickly wrapped it around my head. As I finished, I heard the door open but I already knew who it was I could smell that discusting scent of blood, puss, decay, and Kami-sama knows what else that sickening scents were.

"The patient is fine now but I'm concerned the medical history might be incomplete."

"It has everything that is necessary for you to know." Orochimaru stated emptily. I looked down. I hate how I can't read him by his expression or voice! And then there's the lack of concern about the patient. Though usually I'm calm and collected, Orochimaru and his sadistic ways pissed me off. I could use my ability but I really don't want to see what goes on in his head.

"You know, I probably could more effeiciently help Kayuga-san if I had proper attire."

"What's wrong with what you have on?"

"It's covered with so much germs and bacteria. I wouldn't want my patient to get sick again on my account."

"Don't you mean you don't like those filthy clothes contaminated by blood?" he stated mockingly.

I stared angrily. I hate all violence but I have no trouble inflicting pain and did he ever need a good punch in the face. He would probably do this often: patronize me, try to make me feel as worthless as possible til' I was broke down into another one of his mindless drones. Iro would probably die after that so it won't happen anytime soon. "Well now that you mention it something clean and not seeming like it came from a war would be nice."

"I'll consider it." He turned to walk away and I lost it. He was brushing me off like an insect not worth the trouble. I never acted like this before and it surprised me now that he could get to me like this right now. It was probably the lack of food, water, and sleep for the past 25 hours. I picked up a metal container and crushed it into a ball and threw it as hard as I could against his head.

As it made contact with his head, a trickle of blood streamed down his neck, as did mine. A sharp spear-like bone was held against my neck. Even breathing was heard as the room went silent. Kimimaro was up and about with eyes like a sociopath, like what he was do was fine or didn't bother him. I stared forward as Orochimaru suddenly started bleeding heavily. The blood started turning a darker color til' it became brown and then Orochimaru himself, began to turn brown and melt. Earth substitution method.

"Ganbatte _Hayashi-kun._ I hope you do well as a doctor for your remainder here. I will assign sound ninja to accompany you around til' I know for sure you can be trusted and to familiarize you with the base." An echoing voice stated amused.

Kimimaro slowly withdrew the blade and stared with child-like, _innocent_ eyes and studied me. Finally, he spoke quizzically after 3 minutes, "You are. . . my new doctor?" Still studying me, he patiently waited for a response.

"Yes. I'm your doctor." I completely calm now stared and studied him. He was a teenager, somewhat tall and slender, he was pale also but I think thats his natural skin tone. "You may call me Isha-san (Mr. Doctor!). I hope you are feeling better Kayuga-san."

"Don't call me by my clan's name. I am Kimimaro. I am feeling better. When is Orochimaru planning to return?"

"Gomenasai. That's good. I don't know, but I'm sure he doesn't care." I spoke slowly, answering each question at once and watched him to see how he would react to my statements. I must have hit a nerve with my last sentence because he glared angrily at me and coldly stated,"If you ever speak or address Orochimaru-sama with disrespect or try to direct harm his way I will not hesitate to kill you even if I end up getting sick again."

"Gomen. Wakarimasu. So how are your lungs doing? Is it any easier to breath?" I asked, hoping to change the topic. I looked at his soul when I noticed he woke up. He had a horrible childhood filled with loneliness, blood, war and hate. To him Orochimaru saved him from that life. I understand why Orochimaru is so important to him, but is he too blinded by faith to see how Orochimaru is no better then his clan, locking up prisoners until he felt like using them?

"I can breath fine."

I put on a fake smile though I don't know why. I suppose to reassure him. "Then I'm sure you will heal easily and go back to . . . serve . . .under your lord. I'll pray for you"

Kimimaro stared at me for a while and then calmly stated,"There is no God. It's just fake worthless folklore to keep people in order and give them false hope. They do not realize that they are only making reality more painful."

"God cannot save everyone and make everyone hopelessly dependent on him. We must live on own lives and learn with our experiences and keep faith in him until our trials are done. If we cannot find peace in our lives we can find it in our after lives when we journey to heaven."

Kimimaro stared at me as if he was considering what I was saying but wasn't going to believe it. I finally decided to break the silence again,"We are who we are. I not trying to force my beliefs on you. It's your own choice."

I turned to walk away when Kimimaro suddenly began to speak again,"How would he expect us to keep believing in him if he forces us to suffer and feel pain which we don't deserve or can't help or escape?"

"God asked Abraham to sacrafice his son to him. Though it pained him to do so Abraham brought his son to the top of the mountain and tried to kill him. At the last second, an angel messenger stopped him and said that it was a test that instead he should sacrifice the lamb caught in the thicket. It's all a question of faith. . ."

After my work with Kimimaro was done, I left the hospital ward and, as promised, I was accompanied with the appointed sound shinobi, but found they were completely useless. They followed my every movement, but didn't show me around much. I decided if I was going to live here, I should lose them and investigate this place for myself. It seemed like simple enough:

Plan 1: Summon Inugami to carry me. He should scare half of them of with his size and bloodlust glinting in his eyes.

Plan 2: Look in their souls for a simple phobia.

Plan 3: Desperate measures. (Only use in emergencies)

"I am tired of walking so I will summon my animal to help by carrying me around. Is that okay?" I asked calmly. As they shrugged, I quickly summoned him, hoping he wouldn't just automatically eat them all. In a cloud of smoke, a purple aura appeared and killing intent rained down on each one of us. 3 of the 5 shinobi ran then before they even saw his form. Inugami stood in front of us and another ninja fainted.

"Hey wake up" the guard yelled.

"Can I eat him?" Inugami inquired, tongue hanging out and cackling lowly.

"NO" I said firmly.

"YES," sneered the guard, "We have no reason for pathetic weaklings. Besides if you don't, Orochimaru will to this fucker and the dumb fucks who made a run for it. Especially since it was given as a direct first priority order.

"Shut up," Both of us said at once. Then I asked curiously,"Why is it first priority?"

"Probably because if you wander alone you might free the rest of the prisoners, escape, tell our location, and start a battle that would endanger Orochimaru-sama's plans."

"Probably, you don't know?"

"Where to now?" he asked with a hint of anger, avoiding my question.

"I plan go where ever Inugami wants to."

"I smell food up ahead. . .I'll be going there."

"There isn't any mess halls or kitchens near here. What do-" The guard was cut off as Inugami broke into a run, leaving the guard in a confused daze. Twisting from each corridor, he stopped towards a wing in the south. But this scent wasn't food, this scent made me hold my breath so I wouldn't gag because of my over-sensitive nose. This scent was blood and bodies of the dead.

Suddenly, I could hear it. The agonizing screams. The painful, begging cries coming from each room. Men, women, children, and oh God even infants! I couldn't move. I was afraid to breathe. In a swirl of panic, memories that were buried deep in my mind, surfaced. But I don't want to remember what happened on the bridge or why pain was shooting through my bloodied arm or why my ribs were jutting out of my right side, at least not now. Forcing the memories down, I hobbled, clutching my head with one hand, to the door closest to me as the memories settled and opened it.

Smeared with blood, a restrained man lay on a table, needles beside him in a tray. I walked towards him, my thoughts completely under my control now, and he stared back up at me, eyes wild like a trapped animal. Examining him more closely I saw who he was. Golden eyes, neck-long sandy-brown scruffy hair; he was my fiance. Large gashes were covering his body (where his chakra points were, I noted), and left unattended he could die. Looking around, I saw thread and a needle on a counter. I walked over and picked them up. This would do. I sewed him up and he screamed louder in pain. I stared at his eyes. They were looking at me but they weren't seeing me. I shrugged it off, thinking that it was probably because of whatever Orochimaru had in those needles.

I heard the door open, but I didn't even look up or stop my work. I saw no need since I knew who it was and could already tell he was highly amused with my efforts. "I'm sorry you saw this," Orochimaru stated to mock me once again. Standing at the door he began advancing towards me,"Oh, and I let your cute little dog into the experimentation cells for a quick snack since he seemed so. . .ravenous. I hope you don't mind."

"Even if I did, I doubt it would have affected your decision. What exactly kind of fruit were you hoping to produce with this experiment?" It's funny how I kept my same low, bored tone even though I was somewhat concerned with his well-being. Then a thought hit me fast and hard, though I made sure it didn't show: I never knew his name or at least never bothered to memorize it.

"That doesn't concern you. What does, however, is the fact that you aren't allowed in here. Where are the guards that were supposed to be on duty?"

"3 ran away as quickly as possible, 1 fainted 5 seconds afterwards, and the last one couldn't keep up with our speed or actions. They weren't the strongest of ninja. How many of my villagers have you brought here to use as lab rats for your experiments, may I ask?"

He smiled a dark, demented smirk and said, trying to hold back a laugh,"Half of them that survived the village massacre."

"And the other half?"

"Tortured to tell me where certain scrolls are and secret jutsus that your village created and only knows how to perform, candidates for my next body, new recruits for my village, new toys for the guards, and things like that."

I tilted my head up and closed my eyes and wondered what would happen with my friends, family, and any others. What kind of pointless tortures and experiments would befall them. Mercy here is probably just considered a swift death or opportunity to become a follower. I hated violence. I hated to think about what was going to happen and half in thought I spoke words I knew formed a no turning back zone, "In the village I was considered the most skilled shinobi, which is why I was arranged to marry into this man's family, a family of the most powerful ninja and feudal lords. I knew every jutsu from that vllage inside and out and even created some myself. I could show you, if you're willing to strike a deal with me."

"What kind of deal would it be? I won't grant your's or Iro's freedom."

"I realize this, but my demands are similiar. All the left over citizen and shinobi from the Village Hidden by the Wolves and the children are to be released."

"My, my so demanding aren't we? What age range would you consider as children?"

"New born to 14." I answered, wondering I probably could have added on a few more years and still have sounded reasonable.

"How will I know they won't say anything about their visit here?"

"I developed a technique that can alter memories."

"Fine. I'll let your villagers go. But as for the children, I'll only release the ones I have right now. I don't plan to release everyone that comes into my possession. Understood?"

"Hai, Orochimaru-sama" He smirked at me and pinned me against the wall with one arm. When I felt cold metal against my back, I suddenly realized that as he advanced towards me I subconciously kept backing up. I tried to move but on the right side of me I was held in place by a medical supply cabinet.

Orochimaru leaned in uncomfortably close to me and crooned," Oh, my! Have my ears deceived me or did you just address me with respect?" I stayed silent and he continued to break the boundaries of personal space. With his free hand he lifted up my chin so my eyes locked into a deep gaze with his snake-like eyes. Those greedy, hungry eyes. For some reason I wasn't scared of him anymore but something in my mind told me something was akward. "Do it again."

"Hai, Orochimaru-sama."

Smiling, he moved away. Heading back to the door with his hands on top of his head. He stopped and asked, "Are you coming or do you prefer to stay here?"

"What about him?" I pointed to the nearly forgotten patient.

"What about him? He going to die. I did an experiment that no one could possibly survive through. He'll be dead in an hour."

"Why him?"

Orochimaru had stopped and was staying silent. "Let's go," He finally answered, "There was no particular reason. I just randomly chose him. And I hope you can erase more than one person's memories at a time or else you'll be working for a very long time."

"Hai, I can _alter_ as many people's mind as I have to at a time."

Out in the hallway, I heard something clattering on the floor. I looked down and noticed my wedding ring laying there. The blood covering my hands must have made it slip off. Since it fell near Orochimaru's foot, he kneeled to pick it up. Orochimaru down on one knee, handing me a wedding ring, and saying, "Kiki, would-" was what that fat ass guard from before saw when he ran forward yelling, "I finally found you, sneaky bitch!"

The next second, his head was on the on the ground. "I don't need pathetic weaklings who can't even handle simple orders to serve me." Orochimaru stated, "Now for the rest..."

"Chotto matte! The dungeons first!" I pulled Orochimaru away to distract him. I want to help anyway possible to stop him from killing since it started because of me.

_Okaasan... see the blood. see it run but I don't care anymore,_ I thought quietly to myself.

**A/N: Hi! I want to explain a few things. First DISCLAIMER: I DONT OWN ANY NARUTO, INUYASHA, FMA, or any shows mentioned in this fanfic! Second that song in the chapter was Why or Why Not. It's the ending to Higurashi no Naku Koro ni (When They Cry). I also don't own it. **


	2. Wondering

**This is starting with Orochimaru not Kiki.**

I was tired of being dragged around by my arm and as far as I could tell this is how it was going to be for a while. I began to realize she had no idea where she was going. I tried to keep my temper in check as I made an attempt to tell her to stop. We did but that was because we tripped over . . . a dead body in the hallway? I fell on top of Kiki and she moaned in pain. The dead body wasn't exactly dead; it was awake and staring at us. Damn it! Now I had to kill this worthless excuse for a shinobi! I had to kill the other man for seeing that first incriminating sight.

If degrading rumors or signs of weakness start to spread, then respect, loyalty, and fear might begin to waver. But he would have died anyway for being so incompetent. I tried to choke up the Kusanagi but was dragged away again and only given the excuse,"We need to hurry so I can help those prisoners and get your training at least started today!" That annoying hollow voice was back and making my temper flare worse, but the worse thing was I could look at her and see _she knew! _

_**Kiki's POV:**_

I ran faster and hoped he wouldn't get too angry. He was already pissed that I was soiling his reputation so much. It's not my fault that guard took a snooze on the floor. . .after seeing Inugami. . . Still he was a shinobi, he should know better! I picked up my speed and let go of Orochimaru's hand. I still felt the cold blood running, smearing across my hand but I didn't care!

Oh, Kami-sama. I left that man alone, in the dark, and in such pain! How could I have!? What's happening to me? Orochimaru is changing me and bringing me closer to letting Kaji out. Last time wasn't like this; I wasn't safe last time. But now he's making Kaji the dominant one. . . I can't- I won't relive last time!

_I was breathing hard. Running so much. Tired. . .so tired. Stop it! I didn't do anything wrong! Why are you chasing me ? I CAN'T B-R-E-A-T-H-E. My sight . . . it's getting dark. . .why? Silence. Nothingness. I can see now. Blood it's everywhere. It's staining my sight, and scent. NO. NO. NO._

It was because of this place! So many times I erased my emotions just to avoid these moments. Emotions to me were so dangerous. I bottled them all up and pent in the evil inside me. But this place, all these sights and vibes. The horrible everything! Everything brought out a new sensation, memory of when I lost control. . .

"Onegai. . .I don't want to remember!!" Shit. I whimpered that one out loud and Orochimaru who was miraculously keeping up with my pace, was staring at me. Tears ran down my cheeks for a limited time. And damnit he heard and saw me and was about to raise questions about it. That would rip open more old wounds and I didn't think I could handle it.

"What do-" Bring in the salt.

"I just realized I don't know my way around. Which way is the dungeon?" I said quickly and luckily honestly, otherwise he would probably not buy it. We both stopped and the atmosphere became somewhat uneasy. I wanted so much to avoid this topic. . .

"I'm not such an idiot as to not being able to tell your changing the subject. What did you mean before?" His eyes narrowed and were boring through me and I just stood there with my eyes low.

"It means just as it sounds. So just drop it and let's go." But he didn't. He grabbed my arm so hard he almost broke it. That grip was chakra enhanced, but he was overpouring his power in.

"No. You're going to tell everything from start to finish now. And no. You don't have a choice in this matter." He wouldn't drop it. Not him. What's worse, he would keep at it until I was completely naked and exposed. I couldn't survive if that happened. My masks are all I have.

"I never have had any." I took a deep breath and began the short version, speaking slowly avoiding eye contact. . . Lying my ass off wouldn't be too difficult. I couldn't relive my pain. She was breaking free!

"I was remembering things about the day my village was thwarted. I have a tendency to repress my memories. I don't want to remember all that bloodshed and-" Orochimaru elbowed me in the stomach and pulled my head until the back of it was resting in the nape of his neck. He licked my neck, dragging his tongue up and down until it reached my lips. His hands got a little too chummy with my shirt.

"I know you're lying. I hear it in your voice." I think he was smelling me now. "Tell me the truth or else. Are you forgetting something? Like Iro-kun? Or all your villagers? Keep up your lying and see what happens."

"You won't be able to hold them over my head for long."

"I wonder."

"Hanyous are half demon and half human, which I'm sure you know. And that's me. Sometimes I black out, then begin to remember things later. Sometimes it's because of my demon blood changing or I repress the memories, I didn't lie about that." I stared at him and saw those eyes causing me to becoming increasingly scared. I couldn't read them but they had dark thoughts hidden in them."That's all there is." I took a breath and made a jump. "What are you going to do now?"

I fingered the good luck charm my mom, my _real _mom gave me. It was a ram- an intricately detailed ram I had on a necklace. It was sterling silver, only an inch all the way around and it usually gave me a sort of confidence. Ignoring my question he fished for more information sounding newly intriuged, "What does your demon blood changing mean?"

"Why do you need to know? It's not beneficiary to you."

He gave me a demented grin and said," More than you know, now I can tell you gave me a basic summary. Now start again and explain in detail." Those hungry of his eyes. . .his intentions became clear and now I couldn't back away. . .

_"I've slept for sooo long Hayashi. Let me out... You can't keep me chained up anymore. . ."_

I pushed my speed to the brink where no one, not even a sannin, could match and moved far away. I stayed there and tried to lock Kaji away in my memories again but in weakness she'll come out again. Orochimaru was drawing her out again. . .

What is Kaji? I don't even understand myself, except how she's my demon blood's personality. I found my room and hopped in the shower, still unconciously fiddling with my luck charm. I started calming down and thinking about my real mother. She was somewhat pretty, though I can't remember. Considering she hated and avoided me most of the time, I was surprised t think of her at all. She had black hair and eyes. A cold stare was all I got from her. I supposed it was because of my ears or me being a demon and she being a miko.

She chained me up there, in the mountains, deep inside that cave. I remember those glowing, dark, purple chains that restricted my movement in place. And the demonic aura I kept emitting that attracted the demons. They attacked me. After awhile Inugami began fighting the demons off and feeding them to me. He took care of me even if he turned me into a cannibal. Ironic how Inugami was summoned by my mom to keep me incapacitated and yet he helped me escape. I broke the chains myself. . . no it was Kaji. . . but he helped me fight and run in my weak state.

_Inugami stared at me; bloodied, half dead, and still standing. "Why do you fight? It's not like there's anything for you to live for. You fight and you'll still be restricted and hated. Living is meaningless without a purpose." He stared at me intently and confused. He stayed still sitting next to me unconcerned at my pain. _

_My leg bone stuck out the back of my calf. Kneeling down I wrapped my hands around my leg and snapped it into place. I flinched but remained silent. "I have a purpose like everyone: to live. One day Kami-sama will grant me with as much happiness as suffering when the time comes. It's just a question of faith. I will survive for myself. Maybe someday I'll find someone I can live for and with. There's no reason to give up until the last hour of life." Inugami stared again pondering something. Something in his eyes changed._

What happened to Otoosan? My okaasan forced him away and then I killed him and had to run back to her. Otoosan wasn't right. That look was like my fiance's: staring but not seeing. He killed my new okaasan and I had to protect me and my new imootosan. My new okaasan was Winter. White hair, white eyes, pale skin. She was a demon too. She had kinda pointy ears like an elf, slender and was almost as tall as Otoosan, and he was tall! Otoosan. What was he like? Tall, dark green hair, green eyes, somewhat slender, and well-muscled. Imootosan. . .I haven't seen her in so long. . .she looked like Winter-san. Only she had white dog ears sorta like mine. She was so young. Where is she now?

We used to have a wonderful bond where we could speak or know where each other were with our minds. But that faded away sometime during my time in the cave. I began unconsciously rubbing my wrists. Cold metal began stinging my palms as the shackles appeared again. The chains, when I freed myself, broke at the base and if I concentrated chakra through my arms I could call them out like a special ability (yes like kurapica from hunterxhunter). They saved me countless times so I suppose that there was a very good reason for being locked up for that period of time.

_Inugami tore through the advancing demons like they were paper. I still had limited space to move but I fought back, helping him, the best I could. The remaining injured demons crawled away after an hour, but they would be back because they always came back. "Why are you helping me?"_

_Inugami looked back not bothering to move his head,"Because I have found a master worth serving." He bite down into a recently murdered oni and tore a chunk of meat away and held it infront of Kiki, "Now save your strength and eat" I stared at the food and became entranced with it. Suddenly I realized how ravenous I was and almost uncontrollably devoured it, my greedy tongue probing out of my lips to drink away the blood dripping down my chin. Then for the first time Kaji, though weakly, came out. _

I remember what Kaji first told me when I understood I wasn't alone in my mind. _I am the fire which burns down the forest so that it can be reborn from the ashes. I am a natural part of you. You cannot exist without me just as I cannot exist without you. But I refuse to serve someone weaker then me. If you fall, I will crush you and lock you in your own mind in my place _(yes kinda like the hollow from bleach).

I wrapped a towel around my waist right below my bosom. I should get dressed and visit Kimimaro. . . I've figured out this base mostly by scent but still it would do. I inspected my clothes to see what was clean enough to put back on. In all honesty, I knocked out some people and stole their clothes so some ninja are running around naked. . . Well these clothes are to be thrown away for sure. I picked them up and crept into my room so Iro wouldn't wake up but he was already awake and talking with Orochimaru. He turned his head towards me smirking but keeping that cruel look in his eyes,"Get dressed and lets finish our work." He walked towards me and grabbed my hair and yanked it towards him. "Don't try me. I'm mad right now so hurry or I can't guarentee you will keep your head."

I extended my claws and scratched his face. As Orochimaru felt the blood run down his face he felt my tongue licking it away. He stayed still and didn't move. Iro was haunched on his legs ready to jump Orochimaru if necessary.

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I didn't move because something seem to change in her when I harmed her. She seemed . . . dangerous. Not that I was going to start complaining anytime soon. Lapping up the blood quickly changed as she put her hands on my face and began to suck on the open wounds. I found it funny but I was enjoying myself. "_You have delicious blood. Please give me more. . ."_ I don't know why but her voice sounded so seductive. Suddenly, I would have liked nothing more than to give her all my blood.

I smirked, regripping my hand in her hair and pulling her head back,"Stop dawdling Kiki, or else." Her eyes were no longer impassive. They had bloodlust and sadism which reminded me of. . . well . . . my eyes. Chills were sent up my spine as the injury began to burn when she caressed it.

She stared up at me licking her lips. Smirking like me, she purred, _"Call me Kaji Orochi-kun. . ."_

**Kiki's POV:**

I smelled blood. . .now I can't see anymore. Suddenly, I can see the ruins of my mind. Sand-colored bricks, metal rusty doors. Unstable and crumbling. I walked down the endless corridors of my memories. So many doors that lead to memories. I examined each door suspiciously. Which. . .or rather how many doors open Pandora's Box? Staring and thinking I remembered through all the plagues, hate, and madness came the beautiful gift of hope. I reached for the knob but I voice called me back, "_I'm bored Kiki. . . Take back control. . . You have a promise to keep with Lord Orochi-kun . . .I approve of him . . .Let him work with you. . ."_

"Well Kiki-kun it's about time for you to start the jutsu isn't it?" I glanced around noticing how I was in a rather large cell with the appointed people ready to forget. I made about 5 hand signs and then, all at once, I entered everyone's mind and began to alter them. I also sidetracked myself by looking at what happened at the Wolf Village's massacre. I could only watch for a few minutes for the grisly, bloody scenes of my friends, family, and children being slaughtered sickened me.

Through these people's eyes I saw the dying begging for help but they kept running, trampling the bodies. Hot tears ran uncontrollably down my face, stinging and burning my eyes. I couldn't let these people forget what a horrible thing they've done. Turning their backs on the helpless, throwing people aside just to save themselves. For my village's new reality, a contageous, deadly, incurable plague occured. They basically did the same thing but technecally different: refused to help the infected, saving themselves and then burning down the village and it's sick to prevent further spread.

I stared around through the other children's memories. How would I change them? I sat thinking long and hard, but my concentration was almost broken by an eager voice saying, "Hayaku!! There are other things we must attend to." I barely needed change most their memories. Most all of them were orphans he found wandering the street. He saw certain potential within them. All I decided to add was that their orphanage burned down because of an accident in the kitchen and now they were just aimlessly wandering around. Golden eyes stared intently at me as my eyes slowly opened. He was obviously annoyed.

"Where are we planning to let these prisoners free?"

"What were the new memories?" He gave that taunting smirk, his eyes now glowing.

Aggravated that he ignored my question but not wanting to play games with him, I answered truthfully, "For my villagers a plague, the children the orphage burned down. Quid pro quo. Answer my question."

"And if I don't want to?"

"I won't teach you. It was part of the deal so I have a right to know."

His eyes flashed dangerously to anger but maintaining the urge to lash out, he replied, "About 500 miles south of here."

"I want to supervise the move, then we'll train." I stared him down the best I could. "Gomen. Demo I don't trust you."

When we returned, Orochimaru pushed me so close to the wall, our bodies were touching. "It's time for the training. No more putting it off."

"Hai. Show me to your training grounds. I'll teach you Blades of the Tornado. It's quite a sufficiently powerful jutsu."

"That's more like it. Kochira desu," he said gesturing towards a slightly wider hallway. We had started walking when Orochimaru began drilling me for information on the technique. "What exactly happens with this attack?"

"Chotto matte. At least wait until we get to the training grounds then I'll show you. So please be patient. I'm sure it won't take long."

"We're here already." I scanned the surrounding area and sighed. I didn't want to be his sensei. Orochimaru was famous so I know what happened with his last sensei. The poor man loved him and he killed him. And I don't want to know about what might happen if he gets frustrated that he can't master it right away.

"This technique is fairly difficult to completely control. In order to see where exactly your at so show me your speed." That smile was again plastered on his face, telling me that he probably was very fast but not planning to show me his full ability.

"Of course,_ sensei._" That voice scared me, because the tone in his voice was so sadistic. Worse still, I blinked and he vanished. Spinning round to try and see or at least catch a glimpse of him, a hand clamped on my shoulder so hard I thought that the dullest of kunai were being forced through my flesh. "I'm behind you _sensei._ Or am I too fast for you?"

"No. You have sufficent speed." I saw his eyes flinch in annoyance that I didn't show emotion. Ha take that creepy snakey-man!. . . I can't believe I just thought that. . . "Now watch carefully." I did 2 hand signs and concentrated chakra in the soles of my feet. I began to quickly rotate in circles until a tornado a few feet big than me formed. I stopped abruptly and using chakra to force apart the wind. As they broke away from each other the wind formed blades that went in all directions, cutting through most anything and everything. "You try but I don't want to repeat myself.

Orochimaru tried, but either tripped on his own feet or became too dizzy to focus on his chakra. I watched and laughed in silence. He started growling in frustration as I got up. "DAMN IT!"

"It takes a while to get used to the spinning. I'm going to leave you to train by yourself. I'll be in Kimimaro's room doing a follow-up exam. Jaa ne." I walked as fast as possible towards the door. A few knifes were thrown in my general direction, but they completely missed.

"My training..." He started hobling towards me. "Will be done later I supposed but I think I should escort you around the base myself. Besides I sincerely want to see how Kimimaro is." After a few more steps he began to stablize. We walked back inside and found Iro about to open the door. "Okaasan. I was looking for you." He stared warily at Orochimaru as he began tugging my hand. "Come on let's go."

"I was planning to go see Kimimaro. You'll be here a long time, so you might as well come meet him too." I gave him a fake smile. Only a fool couldn't see he was trying to avoid Orochimaru. Those pleading eyes were telling me to hurry away from him. I became sad that I would have to tell him, Orochimaru was planning to follow us around, now that he thought his followers were too incompetent and I might escape now that I knew my way around.

"Let's go now Okaasan." We walked and were about halfway down the hallway, when Iro noticed Orochimaru was following us. Staring in confusion, he tightened the grip on my arm and picked up speed until Orochimaru grabbed his collar and bashed him in the wall.

"Get used to the fact that I'm going to be around, unless you need me to teach you to not disrespect me." Iro's eyes widened in fear. An echoing sound vibrated off the walls making me believe I did what I did; I slapped Orochimaru across the face.

Blood was strewn across my face when my head met the floor. "Leave Iro-kun alone. He didn't do anything!" Orochimaru stared at me and kicked me in the side of my stomach. I retched when I heard bones snapping.

"Let's go. Get up and stop wasting time." I stood and limped the rest of the way. When we stood outside of Kimimaro's room, my rib cage was fully healed.

I knocked on the door and quietly opened it. "Kimimaro? Are you awake?" I stepped inside to find 3 bloodied corpses. Their faces contorted with fear. Tears streaking down the female doctor's face. Orochimaru strode in and kicked her head. When she moaned in pain, he brought his foot down on it. The sickening crack and pursuing sight made Iro-kun run away to throw up.

"Kimimaro-kun, please explain."

I could help but gag at the scent and sight of the bodies that were heaped on the floor. Orochimaru didn't care about anything except now he was expected to clean this mess. "What happened Kimimaro?" He hissed impatiently waiting for a reply. He wasn't like this with me. Well not in interrigation anyway. He sounded so flustered. My bad.

"They weren't supposed to be here. They were flipping through files and taking things out to send somewhere. It was without your permission. They thought I was asleep so I overheard them talking." Kimimaro looked scared for a brief moment. "Did I displease you, Orochimaru-sama?"

A sick smirk crossed his face. I found it sick because it was so sweet and fake. "No Kimimaro. Apparently, spies have infiltrated the base. We should probably relocate soon." Suddenly dropping the expression to one of indifference, he walked up to Kimimaro and caressed his face slowly. Kimimaro smiled back as eagerly as a child. "How are you feeling?"

"Much better, Orochimaru-sama."

"I'm so relieved. I brought your doctor back to give you a check up. Just to stay on the safe side, okay?"

"Hai, Orochimaru-sama."

I stared at Kimimaro after Orochimaru moved over to a nearby chair to sit. He was like a broken record programmed for one man. It saddened me. I began running normal tests: checking his heart, lungs, taking blood and bone marrow samples, and things like that. Kimimaro stayed quiet and smiling not moving his eyes until Iro walked shakily back in the room. "Okaasan. . . when can we go back to our rooms?"

"So you finally came back? Get used to blood and death or you won't last." Orochimaru's taunting voice hissed.

While Iro stared in fear after hearing the voice, I motioned for him to come to me. Fear-stricken induced clumsiness, he tripped many times causing Orochimaru to snicker. I hugged Iro close, my eyes seeing red again. Slowly I stood up, and walked towards Orochimaru. He looked up at me me amused. That damn smirk. He enjoyed Iro-kun's fear. Iro-kun saw the blood and bodies in which he had never seen before. He was completely innocent except for the occasional(almost always) perverted impulses. "Wh-"

I bitch-slapped him hard. When he looked up at me again, I slapped him again. "Don't you fuckin' dare screw with Iro-kun unless you want to die, you fucked up bastard." Blood splattered on the floor, but I didn't care nor falter. Kimimaro had used his finger bullets on me, but I was so blind with fury I couldn't feel the horrible pain it should have inflicted. I ignored it, calmly walked back over to Kimimaro, and pushed him down to make him sit on the bed. "Please refrain from using your kekkei genkai until the tests come back. Also be careful when walking. Your muscles will be slightly atrophied and you might fall or get severe cramps."

Kimimaro stared up at me with that child-like innocence in his eyes. "Will I be able to visit Juugo-san?"

"Dare?(who)"

"Juugo-san is a friend of mine. Orochimaru has him living in one of the stronger cells. We will have him move with us when we change bases. He'll be travelling with me."

"Not good enough to travel with Orochimaru, I presume?" Dark glares had me covet Iro-kun's company.

"That's not it. Juugo-san can be dangerous. I am protecting Orochimaru-sama this way."

"Whatever you say. Well, it depends. You should probably be able to if when you plan to go, you take someone with you."

". . .I would rather go alone. Juugo-san doesn't take kindly to others."

"Sorry otherwise it's somewhat dangerous. May I ask you something?" Kimimaro nodded solemnly. "What did you mean when they said things they shouldn't?"

Kimimaro shifted uncomfortably before answering,"Well I'm not sure what they meant exactly but they said something like 'Orochimaru was giving the newbie doctor a boner'. I thought they were being disrespectful."

Orochimaru was sitting up very alert. His eyes said he was angry: at me, at the "dead" guy, the dead heap on the floor, and probably anyone who heard the rumor.

"Don't worry. I'm sure Orochimaru is very proud of you."

"Can you please help me stand up?"

"Hai." I precariously lifted Kimimaro, trying not to drop him. "As soon as you get more used to walking you can go about on your own." My arms were almost uncontrollably shaky. My whole body was sore when exerting force, no matter how well I distributed the weight. I ignored it.

"Wakarimasu."

I stared at Kimimaro. How is it possible that Kimimaro can only see Dr. Jekyll when Mr. Hyde is the man out most of the time? I understand Orochimaru is his savior, but still how can he not see that Orochimaru does what happen to him to others. How come he can't see that if he had no abilities that he would be dead by now. I feel so sorry for him.

**Kimimaro's POV:**

Why doesn't she appreciate him or realize everything he's done for her? Didn't he save her from a marriage she didn't want? Didn't he let her villiage go when she asked? She sends hate his way. He's keeping her and that child alive. It makes no sense. How is it possible that Kiki-san can only see the fangs instead of the beautiful snake that has been protecting us us? As Kiki-san began walking me to the door I began to ask "Ki-"

"Hayashi. Please call me Hayashi."

"Gomen. Hayashi-san why do you hate our savior?"

"Dare?(who)"

"Orochimaru-sama..."

"He killed half my village, took me hostage, blackmailed me using my son, and is forcing me to work under him. There are many others things he has probably done and not just to me." I felt Orochimaru's cold stare boring into my back."He a sadistic, col-heart, traior. We are just is dolls to be thown away at his expenz. If I din't co. . . coe alonyouwouldbegoner"

**Kiki's POV**

I was slurring and speaking oddly. I don't know why. I couldn't see straight. I was being overcome by nausia and dizziness. I slipped, dragging down Kimimaro alongside me. Blood. I never healed my wounds because I couldn't feel the pain. The bones were still embedded inside me. I've lost so much blood. I'm going to pass out. "Gomenasai Kimimaro. Dijoobu ka." The blood. . . it's so cold. . .it shouldn't be this cold. . .

_Drip. . .Drip. . .Drip_ The steady beat of the IV. This scent of blood, morphine. So sad and ironic how accustomed I had become to being here. I shouldn't continually be a patient in a hospital ward. I could sense five figures in the room. One was Kimimaro, one was Orochimaru, I don't believe I knew the rest. I kept my eyes shut, stayed still, and listened intently. ". . .recovering fine. She'll wake up soon though she will probably be light-headed."

"Very good. Dismissed. Kabuto please take Kimimaro's samples to be tested in the lab. Kimimaro stay with her and keep her here if she wakes. I will be back shortly." It surprised me he didn't realize I was already awake.

Fading footsteps followed by risings ones. He was sitting beside me now. ". . .No sapposed. . .walkin. . .ra. . .mam. . .ba?" I'm not sure I understand why my voice is so weird right now. What do they have me doped on? I opened my eyes and was able to make out the vague silloette that was Kimimaro. Watering my eyes blurred my vision. My clouded vision slowly began to clear. I saw his confused expression gleaming in his eyes.

"Hayashi-san," He addressed me as if it was an urgent matter,"You are a medical doctor, correct?"

"Hai, Kimimaro-san. That is my appointed purpose in Otogakure."

"Why did you not heal youself?"

"Nani?" The question was more to myself. I was under the impression he thought of me as trash or something. I suppose he would care because the incident would make me look incompetent.

"Medical ninja can heal themselves as well as others so why did you not heal yourself?"

I stared. I considered lying but I would have no reason. Besides I think he would be able to know the second I tried. "Anger is a blinding disease. All thoughts are obliterated and the only thing left in mind in the one who caused it. Then there is a limit of control. Only the strongest are not affected by this illness." _Just like imootosan. . . She was the strongest, wasn't she?_ "Wakarimasu ka." Kimimaro slowly nodded his as if to say I'm not completely sure. "Why did you want to know?"

"I was just wondering. . ."


	3. Risking It All

I awoke suddenly to find Kimimaro had left my side and was replaced by the devil-possessed eyes of Orochimaru. I tried to get up to leave but merely sitting up gave me a headache and double-vision. Damn that laughter mocking my pain. "Going so soon? I doubt that would be wise." He was towering over my bedside now. My breath hitched; there was something wrong - no _different_ - with his eyes. In an instant, he was on top of me looking down directly into my eyes. " Now you owe me." He saw the confusion in my eyes and continued, "Where did you think all your new blood came from? When the time comes you'll have to return a favor to me. Wakarimasu ka." He traced his finger across my jaw line, sending shivers down my spine.

I was so uncomfortable. One of my repressed memories of an unpleasant experience came clearly to mind. "Hai. Now please get of of me." A long time ago when I was 15 years old I was almost raped while taken prisoner during a war I stumbled in the middle of. That strong, overwhelming stench of alcohol... those calloused hands groping me... the pressure smothering my body... Luckily, the village or campsite or where ever I was held, was raided before any thing further happened. Tears sprang to my eyes as memories became a tsunami, flooding my mind._When did those shining days disappear? How could I let them slip through my grasp? Where are all my pleasant memories?_ Once again, I had to force them down along with my accompanying, depressing thoughts. Why did he cause these memories to resurface so frequently?

He frowned once again obviously annoyed. " Just remember." He got off me slowly, his movements in perfect sync with the rate of my breathing. When I could no longer sense him, I exhaled a deep breath, my panic draining. "You owe me. You should probably keep your calendar open for the next few weeks just two be safe."

Regretting my next move I asked straining," What exactly do you expect me to do? Do you have a particular catergory you might want to define the job as?"

He smirked as I flinched. I wasn't flinching because of him, though he probably thought so. No, I flinched because when Orochimaru leaned on top of me had unhooked all the pain killers. With the effect of them wearing off I figured out I had more damage to my body then when I fell unconcious. " Let me just put it this way: I saved your life, so whatever I have you do it will be equal to what I did."

I sneered. "It feels like you did more bad then good to me..._Orochi-kuuun._" My eyes widened. My voice had changed and was being controlled by Kaji. "_Really that makes me sooo sad... You did deserve those slaps by the way. You shouldn't be such a huge asshole. Is this because you never had parents? tsk. tsk. tsk." _I listened intently to the words and realized Kaji was only saying what I was thinking.

He was beside me entwining his fingers in my hair. He leaned real close to my ear (or rather where my ear would have been if I was in my human form)"You should be careful with what you say to me. Sooner or later you'll go too far. Then what?" My eyes widened again as he kissed me...passionately. I kept my mouth closed so he wouldn't feel the need to explore my mouth any further. He stood erect (not the perverted way perverts XP) and casually walked away. He stopped at the door and looked back to me calmly. " Kaji came out to play, so blame her for your condition. Which reminds me you have some healing to do to a few of my subordinates when you're given the okay to go." He walked out and something snapped.

Waves of emotion, mostly consisting of confusion swept over me. _What the hell? He kissed me... My husband...he killed him, why? Me?No... Shit. Tears... His death was my fault? Kami-sama, how many were my fault? Those guards? Oh Kami-sama. _STOP. I had to stop. Sadness was a weakness here. I need to concentrate... Taking deep breaths, I focused my chakra and desperately tried stand up, nearly and painfully colapsing many times. I decided to sneak around the base to be completely familiar with it.

Secretly, I was hoping to find a safe haven where Orochimaru couldn't find or walk in on me by chance. I had a feeling I would be avoiding him for a while. I exited the room wondering why this memory came up the few minutes before. _I was almost raped when I first came here, and closer to the same conditions no less! So why? Why this unusual fear? Why did he kiss me? Why is Kaji acting up? If she really came out, why isn't he dead?_ These whys were becoming so annoying. All this pain that I stuffed down was coming back again_. Stop and keep focus. Stop and keep focus. Stop and keep focus. Stop and keep focus._ This was my new temperary mantra. It was stupid but helping.

Endless hallways made me frustrated and lose hope quickly, especially since my mind was pondering over the incident earlier, until a thought of the dungeons struck me. He doesn't care plus he barely goes there unless he needs to experiment on someone. The scent of disease and all else was bearable as long as I believed that I could have somewhere to disappear to. I heard faint scratching noises from a cell so I put my head to the door. I listened staying absolutely still and quiet. I'm not sure what his incoherent mumbling was exactly or meant."A girl, yeah definitely a girl this time..." I was looking for a place to stay but I wasn't sure I should chose here... I stared down at my chest... no way I'd pass off as a boy. Grim thought entered my head on what this prisoner meant. I decided it would be smarter to back off. Quietly, I continued down the hall.

An iron door that looked rusted shut stood out only three doors down. Curiousity got the better of me as I found myself nearing it. I peered through the barred window causing a sickly voice to ring out," You fucking bastard. Unless you want me to fucking die and drag you to hell with me you'd give me food or water."

"Gomen? Do I know you?"

He stared up with a look of surprise,"Who are you?" He was sitting in a corner. Black hair, red eyes, a tall, lean figure. He was pretty hot... Nani? Kami-sama, what was I thinking? I had just met this man and yet here he was affecting my body. _Hey man, I can look._

"Kiki. You are...?"

"Kurogane... Gomenasai. I thought you were someone else." (Yes Kurogane from the tsubasa chronicles... I got writers block so I borrowed a character. again. sue me.)

"Who did you think I was? Orochimaru?" Those eyes. . . why did they have such misery locked deep in them? _He's probably been locked in here for a long time._

"Hai." He was staring at me akwardly, then his eyes hardened to a degree that made my chest tighten with fear. This man was dangerous. "Why is one of Orochimaru's lackies here?"

Suddenly the hurt inflicted by the stare was returned by anger. "Don't ever call me that! I'm only here because Orochimaru destroyed my village! I'm a prisoner!" Funny how a part of me didn't believe what I said. _I am here against my will! I am!_

"Gomen. . ."His voice sounded muffled and only half sincere. I felt sorry for being angry and snapping. I could tell he wasn't sure whether or not to believe me, but then again I never gave him a good reason.

I took my backpack off. Yes I was wearing a backpack. I have it with me all the times. It's filled with home-made food and water and my chibi, brown fox, Jinta-kun. He always followed me around. He was hiding or has been hiding in my backpack for a while ever since my "husband" informed my mother he hated animals. I was still in my bloody clothes that Kimimaro had messed up, too. They didn't really bother too much with me after they dumped me in that medical ward.

"You said you were hungry and thirsty, ne? Well I happen to have some food and water. . . demo it's Din Ni Guan. I don't think you'll like it. . ."

"Nani desu ka"

"Din Ni Guan."

His eyebrow raised. "Is it edible?"

"Well yeah. . ."

"Then hand it over." He bowed down on the floor. "Onegai."

"Hai,doozo." I pushed and pulled at the door. It refused to budge. Studying the door, I found only one possible way to fit the food in. Cautiously, I slid it through the bars. I said nothing as I watched him guzzle down the water and inhale the Di Ni Guan. Since he was eating I didn't think I should bring up that Di Ni Guan was pig inners cooked in blood. Well at least it tasted good enough to not be questioned.

"This is good. What is it again?"

"Din Ni Guan"

"What's in it?" As I answered with silence he asked again, "Oi, What's in it?"

As I hesitently told him, gaping uncontrollably at him when he just shrugged it off. Half my villagers steered clear of me when they found out. They thought I would grow up to be some kind of sadistic murdering vampire psychopath. He was definately different. . . "So you're not bothered? At all?"

"Why should I be? It tastes fine. That's good enough for me" As he finished ravaging his food, a peaceful, but none the less akward, silence hung in the air.

I broke the silence with a conversation starter. "Hey, your door sure is stuck on tight. How are they going to get you out when we change bases?" He stared and burst out laughing. Hurt, I yelled," Oi! Whats so funny?"

"We already changed like a week ago! Where the hell were you?" He kept laughing til I gave him an unexpected answer.

"I was hospitalized."

". . .Gomen. . .uhh they use a special chakra code thing to keep the door in place. . ." He avoided eye contact with me making me feel guilty for some odd reason.

I laughed. The happy tone and blush it caused surprised me. I never really laughed much. "Hey don't you worry about it! It wasn't anything serious. So why such the security system? You seem harmless enough. . ."

A devilish smirk crossed his face. " Cause I can kill anyone with anything. They don't want to take chances with me. They still regret the last time they did."

I was speechless but oddly enough speaking," You can keep the dishes if you want. Maybe you can kill off a few guards and escape." His arms and face were presses up against the bars, watching me with a weird blush. "Uhh. . . Maybe I can figure out this door. . ."

After five minutes of tinkering, Kurogane spoke up," How do you know I won't kill you when your done? I won't have any use for you."

" I just trust you enough I guess." The door creaked open a little crack. Kurogane pushed it open more with his shoulder, both hands in his pockets.

"You wanna come in?" He used his head to motion inside the cell.

"Sure" I reasoned it would be wrong and down right rude to decline his offer. I mean it's common curtesy. . .right? I walked in and he gently closed the door. At my tensing he simply replied it would look suspicious if a prisoner cell was wide open. Right, duh. I need to start thinking.

As we sat down comfortably in the center of the room facing each other, I pulld out Jinta-kun hoping to introduce them. A light footstep outside froze me in place. The voice from before when I first walked down here came again, " Ohayoo Kimimaro-kun. Genki desu ka. You look better then before."

"Hai. We have a new medic. Orochimaru-sama was able to save me."

"Kimimaro-kun, where is the other guard that came down before you?"

"There was no other Juugo-san, just me."

"No one came down and went over there." Juugo couldn't fit his hand out of the bars so just pointed. Kimimaro walked over to Kurogane's cell. The mud had me stuck up shit creek. I pressed myself against the wall as Kimimaro stood outside the door. Scratch that. . . I was trapped in shit creek.

Kimimaro was right outside the door. My heart was pounding rapidly, my breath caught in my lungs. _I'm too scared to breath! Why? _Kurogane sat back in his corner like the way he was when I saw him. Exactly the same. His face was solemn, eyes angry, body limp. I went for my pocket to fiddle with my necklace but found it wasn't there. A growing pain of loss filled me as I realized I had lost it, my last tie to those shining days.

Tears threatened my eyes but I kept them in, too embarrassed. This was quite odd considering that when I felt like crying, I would damn well cry! Only weak fools would hold things in scared of what others would think! Things like this are exactly why everyone is starting to be the same. . . Kimimaro's voice cut through my thoughts like a katana blade into a human's flesh.

"Juugo-san said someone, somewhat recently mind you, came here." Kimimaro's eyes, just as innocent, no accusation or suspicion. I swear he's a frickin sociopath. Otherwise he would at least grimace while killing or have some emotion.

"Yeah, as a matter of a fact. Some shit-faced guard walked over here to eat in front of me." A crooked smile similar to Orochimaru's kept on his face."He was cutting up an apple and well there was a small accident. Here you go you can have the rest of him. He was delicious." Kurogane carelessly threw a severed arm at the bars. The arm was stained with blood. At the end of it, the protruding bone was cut diagonally but part of it, towards the top, looked as if it was snapped because of the splinters. Plus blood looked somewhat clotted. The hand had a large piece of flesh missing.

"You defying and trying to hurt Orochimaru-sama in any way possible is why your privilege of freedom and your strength is being limited." I flinched. _What of you, Kimimaro? Why did the Kayuga's limit yours? It's all the same just as long as you see past the illusion. Power._ I wish I could stand up and tell this to Kimimaro himself, but then this haven would be no good. Kimimaro, being the faithful dog he is, would run and tell.

"I should be on my hands and knees bowing and thanking Orochi-douche for choosing me to be a next body candidate? Or taking me out of the war and in prisoner cells, where I would have probably ended up anyway? Wow my mistake? Praise the sadistic, psycho snake-freak!" Anger was welling up inside of Kurogane, but he wasn't alone: Kimimaro was becoming surprisingly cold.

"Being chosen for and by Orochimaru_-sama_," Kimimaro emphasized and furrowing his eyebrows in distaste," to be his next vessel is a high honor. I was once chosen but I became ill with a terminal disease and was unable to fulfill my purpose."

Kurogane laughed wildly and scoffed," You look fine now. Wow. Your terminal illness sure was fatal Mr. Ghosty. What? Were you too scared to really give yourself away? Or scared of what Orochimaru might do, after he had taken your body of course, in those _loooong, coooold, sooooapy_ showers?" He was thoroughly enjoying this. . ._maybe too much?_ Kurogane was now standing face to face with Kimimaro with only a quivering door between them.

"I was cured by the new doctor that Orochimaru-sama saved. Maybe he will be kind enough to send one to you." Blood splashed on the floor the way water splashes around the edge of a lake when you jump in. Scarce splotches of blood were flung on the door. Kimimaro's bone-sword was gouged into Kurogane's right lung. His body was convulsing standing up. Violent coughing fits only presented more blood to the gored man. As he fell limply to the floor, I stifled a scream.

Kimimaro's echoing footsteps haunted me. The second I could no longer hear them (27 seconds), I rushed to Kurogane's side. I just came from the hospital, so my chakra was severely depleted...My _human _chakra...Kaji has plenty. . ."_But why would I give any to you?" _Kaji's stated in an amused voice.

"Because. . ." My voice was trembling and she could hear and enjoy it the sadist. . .or masochist. . .

_"My. . .my. . .such a compelling arguement. But my answer is no. . ."_

"You are part of me. . .If I die you die." I recklessly began pouring what little chakra I had leftin a rushing stream directly into Kurogane's lungs.

_"What the fuck are you doing!? Teiryuu!! Onegai!" Kaji began screeching until I started losing conciousness. _A tingling sensation covered my body as a dark purple, almost black, chakra enveloped me. I immediately became fully aware. Kuroganes wound slowly was fading from sight but at the spot of penetration she could tell a permenant scar (sort of like the gramma from Karin:chibi vampire had) would stay. His eyelids twitched and he moaned, but was still blacked out.

That moan was vibrating through her ears. She stared down at him blushing. _He's just as cute as Orochimaru-sama. . . _0.0 _I did not just think that. . ."_ After I fully healed the wound fatigue overthrew me and I layed down next to Kurogane for some much needed rest.

Kurogane's POV:

I woke up with a blood-soaked shirt around my neck, a huge hole in it (the shirt), a weird scar on my chest, a little blood leaking from my mouth and that girl. . . Kiki sleeping next to me. _Okay. . . I guess something went down here. . .something. . . kinky._ I searched my memory and can't remember getting laid. I stared at her and suddenly grabbed and roughly squeezed her breast. Continously. She moaned a few times and whispered," Kurogane. . .Orochimaru. . ." Well the picture I put together here is me, Kiki, and Orochimaru had a really kinky threesome. She was so good that I lost conciousness and some of my memory. Then Orochimaru-douche left to do his jutsu shit, Kiki was tired and went to sleep, and everyone forgot about me. . ._Yeah that sounds right I even remember her kissing me. . ._

A vein popped in his forehead," Like hell I would let Orochimaru-douche fuck me!!" He was screaming this so guess who woke up. . . with a hand fondling her boob. Kurogane noticed the sudden movement and turned his head.

"PERVERT!!" She kicked me into the wall I almost bashed completely through it.

Not meaning to change the conversation I asked,"Where the hell did you get that strength?"

"PERV!! DON'T CHANGE THE SUBJECT. I'M NOT THAT LOOSE!!

"Gomenasai. But your the perv, giving me a threesome. Or was it gang. . .ish rape?"

"0.0 WHAT!?"

"You heard me!" Kami-sama her screaming seems out of character.

"THREESOME!? WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?" Was I wrong? Hmmm. My logic was perfect no way.

"Oh yeah? Well explain this!" I held out my shirt. I know I sound cocky and all better-then-you. Which is weird cause thats out of character for me. . .

"YOU MEAN WHEN KIMIMARO-SAN TRIED TO KILL YOU AND I SAVED YOUR PERVERTED LIFE?"

That. . . sounded familiar. . .oh yeah I made a masterbation joke which. . .didn't go well with him. . . "Well. . .so that. . . that you kissing me was a dream?" Stupid blush.

She didn't answer she just blushed worse then me. ". . .I g-guess" Her voice was now abnormally small and embarrassed. . .ish. . .ly coated. The light tinge of red covering her cheeks made her look so cute. . . which I wasn't thinking of. . . She suddenly looked at the time and bolted,"I have to go. It's really late. Sumimasen."

I was haboring a turned on . . .friend. . . yeah friend. . . right now who had no right. _Kami-sama if there was ever a time help me now._

_**Kiki's POV:**_

I was lost in a dream circling around Kurogane and Orochimaru. and the drunk who tried to rape me so long ago. . .

_"Teiryuu! Teiryuu! My childish sobs weren't reaching the drunken man's ears. I was in the body of a young girl. . . no of my when I was younger._

_"Hush. Hush doinu-chan. Blood. I was covered in the blood he was covered in. He forced my hands above my head. And more blood. Orochimaru was covered in blood holding me like a baby, cradling me in his arms. His hand reaching up to my face to caress my cheek. _

_"Where's the bad man?" I asked in a child-like voice._

_"I'm here now. Follow me." It was an order. He was dragging me by the hand and I was scared. I have this want to follow but I shouldn't, I know._

_"I'll stay with you so don't be scared." A new voice. Kurogane. I'm still scared but I follow anyway. They hold my hands tightly as though I'm top priority now. It's seems peaceful but I'm walking between two blood-covered paths. And it's staining my hands... We've stopped. There's a fork in the road. On opposite sides, they stand staring down at me. _

_"Choose." Both voices ringing in a meloncholy melody. I look at their eyes. They don't intend on letting me choose. They have cold, lust-filled eyes. They'll kill. _

_Kurogane. . .Orochimaru. . ._

"Like hell I would let Orochimaru-douche fuck me!!" _What the hell?_ Theres something on my breast. . .

"PERVERT!!" I kicked him into the wall as hard as I could resulting in him almost bashing completely through it.

Then he dare to try and make me forget by asking me,"Where the hell did you get that strength?"

"PERV!! DON'T CHANGE THE SUBJECT. I'M NOT THAT LOOSE!!" I feel like I'm over-reacting. Is it because of the dream? The dream made no sense to me and now it's fading from memory the way dreams do.

"Gomenasai. But your the perv, giving me a threesome. Or was it gang. . .ish rape?". . .HE DID NOT say what I think he said. Where or how on earth could he draw that conclusion?

"0.0 WHAT!?" Kami-sama my screeching like a banshee was completely out of character. . . I should try and control myself.

"You heard me!" Dear Kami-sama, he really believes that was what happened.

"THREESOME!? WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?" His face drew a blank for only a second then he turned around like there was no way he was wrong.

"Oh yeah? Well explain this!" He held out his shirt. He sounds way too cocky and all better-then-you are. Which seems out of character to me. . . but then again, I only met him. . .like what? An hour ago?

"YOU MEAN WHEN KIMIMARO-SAN TRIED TO KILL YOU AND I SAVED YOUR PERVERTED LIFE?" Control. . . control. . .control. When that kid from your village got behind you and tore off your kimono, you never got this mad!

"Well. . .so that. . . that you kissing me was a dream?" He was blushing. It was very lightly but still it made him look. . .less intimidating and smaller in a way. . . which was cute.

". . .I . . .g-guess" My voice suddenly became abnormally small. I felt like some shy little girl who met a parent's friend but otherwise was a complete stranger. Damnit. Now I was blushing. A sudden thought struck me. I stared in horror at my watch and ran, almost without leaving an explaination. "I have to go. It's really late. Sumimasen."

_People will get suspicious if I disappear for too long, stupid. Get a hold of yourself. I should get to my room first. And hide the medical supplies. _Kiki was holding medical supplies not for her own use but for prisoners like herself. She had a plan to go to the dungeons and help the prisoners get better. Heal them, bring blankets, food, water, anything to help. Guiltiness for serving Orochimaru made her feel like she had to atone for her sins. But then again, what's another stone cast? The price is already marked up too high to pay off.

_I realize trying to defy Orochimaru is worthless. So why risk it all._

I slipped out of the dungeons and began walking away. Where did I go? To my room, with no stopping. It was my lucky day.

* * *

With Kimimaro to my left and Orochimaru to my right, I walked forward keeping a steady stare at the shrine in front of us. Kimimaro was fine, I mean his usual self, but Orochimaru looked different. He still had long black hair and somewhat pale skin, but his skin was a little darker and his hair in a ponytail. His eyes were black and the purple markings were absent. Black clothes (pants, shirt, jacket, shoes) draped over his body. Across his forehead rested a worn-out headband of the Village Hidden by Wolves.(He's the same as during sasuke's fight at the chuunin exams) Actually now all of us bore those bands. My mind wandered unnoticeably to the events that lead up to this odd mission.

_Upon entering my room I was given a greeting of consistent kicks to my stomach. Blood trickled out of my mouth, but in was left ignored. Then again if it was noticed, no one would have given a damn anyway. I sent a small and rapid glare at my attacker and saw it was none other then Orochimaru. "Doushitte, Orochimaru-sama?" I choked out these words and immediately regretted them. 1) It hurt to speak. 2) Orochimaru._

_"Doushitte anata wa itte? Anata wa shirimasen?(Why you say? Don't you know?) Then let me explain: I came here to assign you another mission and to my surprise you weren't here-"_

_"Maybe I was still in the medical ward, Orochimaru-s-a-m-a." A sharp kick to my face._

_"Don't patronize me! Do I look stupid enough to not have checked there first? While I sat here waitting do you know what I found?"_

_"Iie."_

_"Nani? Kikoemasen. Ooki koe itte. (What? I can't hear you. Speak louder.) "_

_"Iie" I spoke louder but with a rasping voice._

_"Hontoo? Think hard now."_

_"Shirimasen" His foot rested on my head, pushing it deeper into the stone floor. Blood was pooling around us. Pressure on my head increased. Medicine was dropped in front of my face: Penisilin, Vicadin, you name it._

_"Well?" He wanted an answer._

_"You're a cold-hearted bastard. Lying down in those cells are people you sacrifice for your own selfish purposes, people no lower than scum like you."_

_He grasped my chin after he kneeled down next to me. "What will it take to break you...,"He whispered seductively in my ear. He nuzzled the side of my face and licked at the steady stream of blood, dripping down the side of my head._

_I couldn't control the blush that tinted my face, but I controlled the tone in my voice. "T-th-the m-iss-ion?"_

_"Put this on... I'll explain when we get there."_

I averted my gaze to my wardrobe: that of a miko. "I haven't been dressed like this since Hinamizawa. . ." Nani? I was surprised at what I had just said. . . Hinamizawa . . . I have never heard of it, had I? My statement was ignored so I didn't bother thinking too much of it. "Oi, Orochi-"

"Koto-sama" (I forgot, he's using an alias.)

"Koto-_san_" I figured sinc we're on holy grounds dressed as holy people I could get away with this at least until we leave."Why was my appearance changed? I am not well-known and no one knows I am with you." I was different looking but not just my clothes. I was at my natural appearance: Short black hair with red highlights, my black ears adorning the top of my head, and light purple eyes. I don't know why I kept my appearance different in the first place it's locked away in my memories somewhere.

"Maybe I just think you look sexier with the natural look."

I dropped the subject immediately, now pondering the mission at hand. I,or rather we, had to work at this shrine. "Koto-san" was going to look around for some ancient scrolls that were hidden here. We are to notify him if there are any leads of tidbits of information we happen to come by.

We stood at the front of the shrine, they waiting for the head priestess, me admiring the details. This shrine was fairly large. It was kept in good condition, the people here were good people. Very religious. The white paper dangled from the two columns that stood guard, protectively shielding the shrine. The donation box was larger than most and any I have ever seen and surprisingly almost completely full. Drifting my eyes wanderlessly to inspect the architecture, my sight strayed to a scraggly path. Vines and weeds grew over a portion of it, and the other was camoflagued by trees. And yet the path still stood out and seemed to beckon me to follow the trail to the end.

My whole body was facing the path now, but before I could make a step an angry hiss entered my ear," Where are you going, Hayashi-san?"

"Boku wa-"

An elderly woman walked ver to us."You must be Koto-san and his team. Arigatoo for helping us. We are in your debt." She was short and mildly hunched over with a thick gnarled cane clenched in herleft hand. The other was behind her back. Her silver hair was tied in a messy bun leaving a few strands of hair dangling in front of her wrinkled face.

"No," Koto-san put a kind, caring face ,that sickened me,on,"It is our pleasure to serve the holy ones. And we are happy enough to have your gratitude." _If only she knew. _I frowned sadly. I feel not only guilty but like the scum of the earth.

A warm smile lit up her face which made me feel worse. "Come this way and I'll show you where you will stay." We walked behind the shrine to the housing behind it. "Not including you or me, 3 others are here: Nana, Ayame, and Kouta. Go to your rooms now and get some rest tomorrow will have lots of hard work in the early morning. Jaa ne!"

We stared ahead and as Koto-san walked towards the building, I turned and stared at the path. A voice came and whispered from the far corners of my mind,"_Don't despair. It was your destiny to live. I will stay beside you and help out ay way I can but you alone will grow stronger to find and complete your destiny." _In that instant I saw Rika-chama's face, blood leaking from her mouth yet wearing a smile to comfort me. Her eyes turning glassy, and chest stilling. "_Remember your fate. . ."_ As spontanious as it came the voice and vision left. Leaving me with a painful headache and the scent of blood.

A chill racked my body. I was going to remember a lot of things on this trip. I could feel it.


	4. Horror of Reality

What surprised Kiki most wasn't the blinding rays of sun peeping through the windows, nor was it Kimimaro gently prodding her shoulder to tell her she had fallen asleep while sweeping the floors. It was more of she had been up and had did any sleeping. Kiki felt as though she hadn't even gotten around to closing her eyes. But here she was standing tall being propped up by the broom, in which her hands and head rested.

She stood dazed for a moment, blinking and moving her head to scan her surroundings. Looking down she grasped the broom, twisting her finger tightly around the handle's neck, and watched it confused and intently. It looked almost as if she was trying to force answers out of it. Kimimaro not noticing broke her concentration with an unexpected question,"Were you dreaming?"

"Nani? Mo ichido..." she replied trying to make sure she heard him right. A question like that seemed very unlike him.

"Were you dreaming?" Yes, she had heard right.

Kimimaro awakening me had only thrown my mind into a torrent of questions. But the facts were clear: I had been sleepwalking. Something I hadn't done since I was 11! I stared down at the broom to see my robes covered with all sorts of dirt and grime. Was I outside at some point? Kimimaro knowing I had had a dream, confused me further, "Doushite."

Kimimaro stared unnerved by the harshness that was unconcealed in her voice. _Not a question, a command. _Kimimaro thought," You said _'Arigatoo mina! Demo doko Satoko-chan desu?' _I assumed you were talking in your sleep."

Now was my turn to stare only not as unnerved as he was. _Satoko-chan?_ It was brief and painful but with a sharp pain came a image of(what she could make out) a girl with short yellow hair, short pants and a collared pink shirt. My dream came back though it was vague and fleeting.

_We were sitting around a table. A broom sat across my lap. Where are we?Where? We're still in the shrine... We?Two girls looked alike. Green hair... Two little girls. Dark and light blue hair... A boy. Brown hair... Another girl but older. Red hair... There faces blacked out, but white smiles gleaming.Why? I look as I do outside of the dream. In except shorter. They were talking, but I couldn't hear them. There mouths kept moving. I asked something I don't know what... The smiles are gone... I blinked. Oh Kami-sama! Only for a second! Blood. Blood. Blood. This isn't real!!Pain is shooting through my body. This isn't real!! Can't breathe. I... woozy. It burns... so much... itches... the maggots are inside me again... get them out! This is real! This pain is real!!I'm dying...or am I dead?_

_Kimimaro POV:_

I was unsure of what happened. I was inquiring about her dream. She stood unreacting for a moment. Suddenly she was clutching her head in pain. She fell to her knees coughing-no choking. She was clawing at her throat. Blood dripped from her mouth. Orochimaru was having me watch her I had to report when she did something. I was uncertain that I should leave her alone.

I had to report to Orochimaru-sama, so I left her on the floor, her fingernails ripping through her flesh drawing out pools of blood. Orochimaru was not far away. Still in his disguised form, but naked in the natural hotsprings."Orochimaru-sama?"

"Hai?"

"Kiki-san is... convulsing."

"Convulsing?"

"I'm not sure how else to describe it."

Orochimaru's POV:

I was very surprised to say the least when Kimimaro came to me and suggested that Kiki-kun was having some kind of seizure. I was unconcerned so I wasn't very fast in getting out and slipping into my robe. I couldn't have guessed the seriousness of the situation. Kiki was on the floor kicking, gasping, and ripping her own throat off. It amused me to some degree to see her without her calm composure. Those emotionless eyes had been replaced by those of a cornered animal. From her attempt to fling the unseen intruder from her blood splashed on the walls, the otherside of the room, and even to the ceiling.

I had no idea how to control the situation. Kaji wouldn't just allow Kiki to kill herself and yet Kiki was almost bled to death mere inches away from clawing her artery open. I knocked her out. I suppose entangling my hand in her hair and bashing it into the floor was a poor method, but I saw no alternative at the moment. Her body went limp.

"Kimimaro-san go fetch some towels and clean up this mess." He left silently. I picked her body up bridal style. I stood and walked into the bathroom. I turn the water on and prepared a hot bath. The tub was large which came as no surprise seeing was big the shrine itself and the resting quarter were. It almost looked like a hot tub. It seemed big enough to fit 20 peopleee comfortably in. Taking a washcloth, I soaked it and cleaned the self-inflicted wound. I bandaged it with gauze I carried for emergencies. I carefully removed all of her bloodied clothing and slipped her into the steaming water. Grabbing a new washcloth I gingerly bathed her. She moaned in discomfort but remained unconscious.

When I finished bathing her I propped her up into a sitting position keeping her in the tub. I then proceeded to undress and sit down myself. I sat next to her in case something happened, like she falls over or she wakes up in an unwell state again. I stared at her body and found my mind wondering to some time ago. Her husband. Why had I chose him for that particular experiment? I had another "guest" lined up for that one. I hadn't been given a reason to torture him. In fact quite the opposite, he was a good little bird, sang as loud as much as I wanted him to. That man was the one who had directed me to Kiki. I remember it perfectly.

_"Please don't kill me I tell you ever thing!!"_

_"Village scrolls?"_

_"Hidden at the monument! There's a drawer. Look for it you'll see it!"_

_"Thank you... now you're unnecessary..."_

_"IIE!! Matte! My bride-to-be take her!! She's more usefull than me! Take her! HER! HER! HER!"_

_"What does she look like?"_

_"Black! Black hair, black eyes, tall! Take her! Take any villager! Let me go!"_

_I was laughing uncontrollably. "You were deemed a hero to your village. How is it possible with someone as pathetic as you?"_

_"Doko-san!"_

_"Where?" (Doko means where in japanese)_

_"He was my brother! He was the hero. On same mission...died... killed him! Took credit!"_

_"Worthless... Take him to the specially preserved cells."_

I was planning to keep him as a subordinate, but after I met Kiki... I changed plans... I stared at Kiki and realized she was awake and I was kissing her on the lips and cupping my hand around her breast. She had an unusual scent. Sweet like a flower but not like one I ever knew.

"Doushite?" was all that sprung from those lips.

I moved so I hovered over her body, "Why not?" I kissed her this time she kissed back only slightly. Her hands were on my chest to push me away. So I moved from her.

She stared at me, her arms covering her body. She was staring at me quizzically. " 'Why not' isn't an acceptable answer."

"Why kiss back?"

"I'm confused."

The way she's looking at me. That same uncaring face. "Are you a virgin?"

"No" She said it automatically without thinking. It was a lie.

I movd towards her again. " Let me fix that..." A kiss. We were kissing each other. A dragged my hand across her body. I bit her neck. I pulled her under the water and she nestled against my chest briefly.

I was kicked to the bottom and she swam up. I followed after her. When I focused on her, she had a towel wrapped around her body. "I am and I don't want to give it to you. I have goals in life. And out there is the man I plan to marry waiting for me. I don't love you. Sumimasen."

Gone... She had denied and left me alone. I began shaking with laughter. I found this way more fun. Maybe I can find he paramour and have a amusing fight with him. Killing him slowly, as I did with the groom, would be fun.

**YO PLEASE REVIEW!!! THEY MAKE ME HAPPY! PLUS IF YOU DON'T IT FEELS AS THOUGH YOU'VE STOPPED READING. I'VE MADE MINOR CORRECTIONS AND CHANGES IN SOME OF THE PREVIOUS CHAPTERS AND I WILL PROBABLY GO THROUGH ALL OF THEM. SORRY FOR ANY MISTAKES AND STUFF.**


	5. Why?

Why was I kissing him? I was dreaming... of _him. _The man who will forever hold my heart. Kaito-kun. How hypocritical is it that a woman who hate liars, betrayers, and any sort of dishonesty, had in her possession a paramour? Justifying this sin by saying the marriage was arranged is just a shallow excuse. Kaito-kun was a handsome man. Large brown eyes, long dark brown hair often in an uneven ponytail.

We met by chance in the market. So gloomy: grey skies threatening rain. The street empty except for the few stands and a pack of stray dogs looking for food. Drunks came stumbling out of a bar, being greeted by said dogs. A swinging bottle bashed against the leaders head, knocking him over to the side. But that wasn't enough for them. They began to kick and attack them. I jumped in to help them (the dogs). I'm apart them as they are me. Then he stepped in and helped me. We walked around out of town and to the nearby woods.

We found a beautiful clearing. So many exotic flowers and plants. In the center, there was one lone, tall tree. Gnarled roots twisting around in the dirt. It was an odd tree. Sturdy, yet hollow. Though Fall, lusterous green leaves. We found an opening in the tree. When we went in... it was amazing. Underground tunnels, grass, flowers I'd never seen or heard of, a small creek running through one part, and a natural hotspring in the other side.

Best of all, it was our secret. We went and layed together and spoke nonstop about nothing and everything. We never made love...how I wished we could! But since most woman tend to bleed their first time, my groom would know or notice. That wouldn't end well. When the marriage came around, we made a pact. I still remember his words,"_I'm so in love with you! We can runaway together when the time comes. This tree, this patch of land sacred to us will be our rendezvous point."_ I'll wait for him.

I was dreaming of him while unconcious. I suppose I thought Orochimaru was him...

I went unconcious because of a medical condition I have: panic attacks that bring on Idiopathic epilespy. I began them... around the time my memories had faded. Or been repressed. Odd how I hadn't had a seizure for the last 2 years.

A sudden thought hit me filling me with mixed emotions. Usually when I occasionally dreamed, they were prophetic. Did this mean...? I broke into a run to the front doors and collided with someone. Instead of yell of "watch where you're going!" I got a "Sumimasen... Kiki-kun?" I held my breath and looked up into the eyes of Kaito-kun. I was in his arms now hugging him ever so tightly.

"Kiki-kun, Doushite koko wa desu ka." He seemed so surprised and happy.

"I..." I couldn't tell him. He'd be killed. "Just working here."

"It's so like you! Always so nice! Especially to children but I guess that's 'cause..." His voice trailed off and a blush came to his face. But I knew what he was going to say," I guess that's cause it would be so hard for you to give birth to one."

Before he could choke out an apology, I assured him," It's fine don't be embarrassed."

We talked a little bit, then went to the roof to watch the stars.

_By the pricking of my thumbs_

_Something wicked things way comes._

I didn't understand it. We were talking about my village and how it was destroyed and how he was out of town getting medicinal herbs for the clinic, and suddenly that poem popped into my head repeating itself frantically over and over.

_By the pricking of my thumbs_

_Something wicked things way comes._

_By the pricking of my thumbs_

_Something wicked things way comes._

_By the pricking of my thumbs_

_Something wicked things way comes._

I mumbled it out loud trying to understand the meaning.

"Nani?"

"Nothing"

"Nothing's nothing 'cause nothing's a something"

"I suddenly got ... a bad feeling"

"How so?"

"I don't know" I was panicking, but kept my voice cool. With a feeling like this, I never could stay calm around friends and family for long. Mostly because it means the person I'm with is in dangerous.

"...sing."

"Sumimasen?"

"Sing. It always made you feel better." Such a kind smile.

"I-"

"Come on!"

"Fine." I took a deep breath, thought, and sang:

_Saa wasuremashoo sono mirai ga_

_Mata chinurarete yuku nante_

_Namanurui kaze doguro wo maitara_

_Sore ga tabun aizu..._

**Orochimaru's POV:**

_...Nukedashitette nukedashitette_

_Kanashisugiru unmei kara_

_Anata wa naraku no hana janai_

_Sonna basho de_

_Sakanaide sakanaide_

_Karametorarete ikanaide..._

I heard Kiki's singing drifting throughout the hallways. Some of the priestesses and trainees stopped to listen, commenting on how beautiful she sounded. I walked around looking for her and found her on the roof seranading some man I couldn't reconize. _His_ _arm_ was around _her waist_. They were leaning on each other hand clasped in hand. _This_ obviously was the man she had chosen over me. I didn't know who I was angrier at Kiki or that man. Ideas of what to do surged through my mind, but without realizing it, I had jumpedon the roof, reached up, grabbed Kiki by her collar, dragged her close to me and pointed a hateful glare at the man in question. When I realized what I had done my glare turned to amusement.

"Kiki-chan, here you are! My! What a slacker! I suppose you were ridden too hard yesterday but Sloth is a sin!" Kami-sama I thank you for the look of fear embedded in her face. "Gomenasai, Boku wa Koto-san desu. Onamae wa?"

"Kaito-san. I'm sorry I interrupted bokuno Koinu-chan's work."

He had called her _his!_ He had called some ridiculous nickname and she hadn't been correcting him! And she was blushing._ Fuckin' blushing!_ Keeping my face void of my true emotions, I said," Don't worry! Maybe sometime soon I could tell the ways things work around here. Right now I have to remind Kiki-chan."

**Hey sorry people but I have I good excuse for not updating. I had to visit my sister and my grampa had to go back to the hospital for internal bleeding. Plus I'm getting writers block**.


	6. The First Stone

Orochimaru held my hand gingerly as we walked to his room. Right outside the door, his affectionate gesture turned into a death grip that broke my wrist. He tossed open the door and threw me inside. In the process, my arm banged against the opposite wall, making it sore. "Poor little slut. Did you hurt yourself?" He walked towards me, anger burning in his eyes, but a twisted smirk played across his face. I tried to stand but was kicked back down.

"What did I do? Did I disobey orders? No. I've been a good little dog!" A grip on my throat suddenly appeared and tightened, cutting off my air.

"Shhh. If you keep back-talking so loudly I might have to break that jaw..." To emphasize his point, he traced his tongue on my jawline. "As for what you did...straying from your mission."

"Straying? How was spending time with Kai-kun? straying?" At the mention of the other mans name, Orochimaru took his knee and slammed it in her ribcage.

"Your mine! Mine alone! That pathetic sham of a marriage! Where was he then? Where was anyone? Family was forcing you in to it! Your real family long abandoned you!" Orochimaru stopped momentarily to drop and kick Kiki in the stomach. "Your friends? Did you have any? Or were you avoided like the plague? Tormenting, abusive, I was there! Now you belong to me!" At the last sentence with every word he kicked Kiki hard.

"You stand up there on your throne, high and mighty! Dripping with every sin! A savior, you preach? You know nothing, but your desires! Deluting and creating false images! Take away your jutsus, weapons, and what's left? A man alone and weak with only knowledge to hold himself to others. You are nothing! This hollow existance you call a life-"

Orochimaru stamped his foot down on Kiki's leg, shattering the bone, making fragments jut out of various places. "You lay there pathetic and broken, daring to talk to me in such a matter!" Kneeling down, Orochimaru grasped Kiki's chin and forced her to stare directly into his eyes. "Tell me, can you cast the first stone? No. Sin on you may not be as plain as day, but if you look you can see it. Wrath. Envy. Lust. (he smirked while mentioning this) Gluttony. You swore loyalty to me and I expect it."

Orochimaru turned away and walked to the door. Kiki stood up, quivering and splashing blood. She began reciting some poem that didn't fit the situation.

Back to back 2 men stand

Combat began hand on hand

The 2 men jumped, kicked, bled, and screamed

Both won the trophy of pointless agony

Side to side 2 men lie

Down on their knees 2 lovers cry

Leaving them bent and broken

The slits on their wrists

One last action

One last kiss

Back to back 2 men stood

They battled and fought the best they could

Why combat began only they know

Distinguished the difference between friend and foe

Kneeling down 2 lovers cried

By love and devotion did they abide

Forever gone never will they see

Left only is the memory of a heartfelt tragedy

When she finished, she stared directly at Orochimaru. "...You don't understand...and you never will... I might not be completely pure, but I'm not like you."

Orochimaru headed back to Kiki, immensely calmer. "Do tell whats on your mind."

"Why were we expelled from the Garden of Eden?"

"Those pathetic humans. Atom and Eve."

"_Adam. _They ate from the Tree of Knowledge. You've tried to often to take a bite, to not be left unscarred. The Pied Piper will come for his dues. How large a tab have you ran up?"

Orochimaru put both arms on both sides of Kiki locking her in. "Too large... demo I've paid it off with my many discovered jutsus."

"The end justifies the means, right?"

"Yessssss. Don't touch that boy again or I might have to ask Kimimaro to do something drastic."

I stared into those eyes. Beyond the anger, beyond all the hate and sadism, at the sadness. "...Doushite?" I rested my head on his shoulder. Both my hands clutched his shirt.

"Because your mine." Orochimaru stated mistaking what she asked.

"I don't want to be yours... I'm sorry, but I don't see you in that way...I won't ever be with a man so fucked up as you. Sumimasen." As Kiki tried to leave, Orochimaru put his hand on her breast and pushed her against the wall.

"Your mine." Orochimaru's neck extended a little and fangs bit into Kiki's flesh. Her breast to be more specific. The skin bruised and started to form a shape of a small diamond circled by three slimmer longer diamonds. Kiki screamed but was muffled by Orochimaru's lips. She blacked out and broke into a fever. She began hyperventalating.

Orochimaru set Kiki on his bed and went to find Kimimaro. "Kimimaro?"

"Hai, Orochimaru-sama?"

"Fetch Kabuto immediately."

"Hai."

**I was informed of a POV mess up so I'm rereading and fixing it. Review or else I'll stop writing... And I brought back mean Orochimaru... He'll show up a lot more now.** **FYI. THAT POEM IS MINE!!! All mine! Did you like it?**


	7. In Times on Confusion

**Kabuto POV**

Kimimaro had appeared in my lab so unexpectedly, that I never had the chance to tidy up. Blood was splashed heavily in every inch. The corpses I had experimented on and recently aquired. Mutilated body parts were strewn in the left corner. I had just finished with my work for the day. The fruit of my work showed on my clothes.

"Kabuto-senpai, Orochimaru-sama has called for you."

"What is it he needs?"

"That new doctor was given a curse mark.Orochimaru-sama wants you to tend to her."

"Wakarimashita. Demo matte. I have to change clothes and gather supplies." _I'm being summoned to take_ _care of someone who recieved a curse mark? They must be important or they'd be left to fend for themselves. Orochimaru-sama told me to stay here and continue working. He said if an emergency came up he would fetch but this doesn't seem like an appropiate emergency._

Kabuto went into the other room of his lab. Picking up various scrolls, a research notebook, and some narcotics, he grabbed his bag and carefully arranged it tidily. _Even with me there, there's a good chance she may die._ Kabuto's mind wandered to when he first saw the new medic. He had actually seen her many times, but she was always unconscious. He had checked in on her many times when other medics cough were in short supply (Orochimaru killed a bunch). She was odd. Her chakra is practically abundant and with a dark sense about it. _It reminds me of Orochimaru-sama. _Unlike Orochimaru, Kabuto noted how her chakra held the same properties as Kyuubi's. It healed wounds almost instantly and seemed nearly _alive_. "I wonder if Orochimaru-sama would mind me taking some chakra samples." Chakra extraction is a very painful procedure. Orochimaru-sama wouldn't mind. I mean he did hospitalize her Kami knows how many times. But then again...

Another thing that Kabuto found odd-not chakra related- Orochimaru acted completely different around her. In the hospital wing, he'd seen him stare at her. Sometimes he'd go and sit right next to her. He'd lean down and touch her, smell her, taste her. And then there was this one time when Kabuto went by his master's bedroom and opened the door and saw Orochimaru ... with his pants down and ... um...fill in the blanks yourself... Point is Orochimaru was acting strangely. Kabuto saw no particular worth in her. Sure she cured Kimimaro, but still that was just luck that her village was so familiar with that condition. Kiki did have a good body. If it wasn't for her practically suicidal tendecies, she wouldn't be in the hospital so often. _Could she be a new body candidate?_

"Kimimaro-san, I'm ready."

**Kimimaro POV:**

Kabuto-senpai left into the other room to prepare for departure. I sat down on a nearby stool. Kiki-kun was given a new kind of seal, not heaven or earth or any of those. But a new seal that is one of the more powerful ones, a naraku (hell) seal. She's so lucky. She's chosen as someone special to our lord. She may not be able to see it yet but someday she will. I can tell she's blind right now so I intend to help her see the light. I can tell because I see the sadness and lonely and fear locked deep in those eyes. Orochimaru-sama can help her as he helped me.

**Orochimaru's POV:**

Those wide blank eyes filled with fear. Her shallow breath, fists clenching and unclenching the sheets. I took my hand and caressed her cheek, then dragged my fingers through her hair. The kimono I changed her into was falling open and revealing her well-curved body. "Poor girl... just endure a little longer." I stole a kiss from her lips and she didn't react. Smirking, Orochimaru turned to leave.

"Onegai. Yamete. Hitori ni shinai de kudasai!" A panicked shriek escaped from Kiki.

I turned quckly and stared in surprise at her. One of her hands were now squeezing my wrist to a degree where I couldn't move it. I could feel the blood circulation being stopped. "Nani?"

"Onegai. Kowaii desu. Hitori ni shinai de kudasai!"

"Doushite?"

"Onegai!"

I couldn't help but smirk at her desperation. Her calmness had been gone for a while, but still, _she was begging me!_ I had reduced her and broke her down to the point where she was actually begging! I couldn't very well turn her down, could I? "Fine then." I kneeled on the bed, removed her kimono, and placed her under the covers. I took off my shirt and layed under the sheets with her. I put my arm around her and instead of flinching away, she cuddled closer. "Doushite..."

"Kowaii desu... Mamoru..."

"...Aishiteru."

"Aishiteru, Kaito-kun..."

**Kiki POV:**

Surging pain shooting through my body, and then nothing. I opened my eyes and I was smothered with thousands of snakes wrapped around my body. Wrapping around my neck. Forcing me to lay down and still. But I kept moving my hands for they were free. I only stayed sane for the angel staying next to me, caressing me with reassuring touches. _My own guardian angel_. "Poor girl...endure a little longer" a blurred voice sung. _You'll stay forever and protect me, ne_? _Iie. He's leaving me! Why is he leaving me? _

"Onegai. Yamete. Hottoite shinai de kudasai!" I grabbed his wrist and begged him to stay.

He stopped and turned back to me. "Nani?"

"Onegai. Kowaii desu. Hottoite shinai de kudasai!"

"Doushite?" _Doushite? So he can protect me. Why can't the angel see I need him?_

"Onegai."_ Why do I have to keep pleading? Why?_

"Fine then." I felt my clothes being removed and I being placed beneath the blankets, but I didn't care! He promised to stay! He layed next to me and I could feel bare skin touching mine. He wasn't wearing a shirt. He broke the silence by asking,"Doushite?"

"Kowaii desu... Mamoru..."

"Aishiteru..."_This wonderful feeling surging through my body. This beautiful feeling. I've only felt like this once before with one man._

_I know who my angel is..._

"Aishiteru, Kaito-kun."

_**I know it's short but hey I updated it a lot quicker. READ AND **__**REVIEW**__** Thank you. And Mamoru isn't a name it pretty much means protect me.**_


	8. Pointless Suffering

**Kabuto's POV:**

The trip to the shrine had taken a while, 2 days to be exact. Both Kimimaro and Kabuto never counted the dozens of factors that Mother Nature provided. Countless storms and running short on supplies. There was a small run-in with rouge ninja, but they were all too weak and killed instantly. When their destination was finally reached, Orochimaru couldn't be located, so the medic took it upon himself to visit his patient. Kabuto had expected to find Kiki huddled in bed with a high fever and some tossing and turning from nightmares.

Upon entering her room he saw a naked Kiki forced in the corner, tears mingling with ice-cold water that had been poured on her head-to-toe. Snakes bound her hands and feet and tightly gagged her mouth. But these weren't just any snakes; they were _very_ large copperheads that had bitten and tore bits of flesh off her arms for dinner. Bruises covered her body and it was apparent at first glance that many bones were broken. Her face made him pity her; she had a black eye and a bleeding nose that didn't look like it was going to let up anytime soon. Her eyes were dull and a clouded grey. They were of someone who was hopelessly broken.

Kabuto pulled away his eyes from her stare and immediately noticed Kiki had a small trickle of blood and vomit leaking from her lips. Her eyes were clouded over because she choking and inhaling the fumes of the vomit. Knowing how she might die, he ripped the snake from her mouth and flipped her on her stomach. She began uncontrollable coughing, which expeled the puke, but afterwards she started hyperventelating. She clawed her nails into her palms and tried to wriggle away screaming. Aware of another panic attack coming on, Kabuto grabbed his bag and pulled out a powerful sedative.

Now that Kiki was unconscious, Kabuto performed a thorough examination. The cold water that was poured on her gave her pneumonia A kidney was slightly ruptured. A lung was pierced by one of the 6 broken ribs. Her broken, bleeding wrist had a staff infection. She had a concussion in her temperal lobe. Finally because of Kabuto's rash actions and her hemophilia, she had a high chance of slipping into an anemia-induced coma. Diagnosis: She was a walking (or so to speak) miracle. She needed a blood transfusion and a hell of a lot more chakra then what Kabuto had.

Orochimaru's voice made Kabuto jump and drop Kiki. "Kabuto-kun? What's your opinion?"

"Anoo... Kiki-san's condition is critical. With the shape her body is in and with the curse mark settling, I doubt she'll make it. She probably won't even last the day. And can you remove the snakes?"

Orochimaru nodded slowly as though he wasn't really listening. From a wave of his hand, the summons snakes vanished in a poof. Orochimaru stayed deep in thought until he asked," What needs to be done?"

**Orochimaru's POV:**

As Kabuto rambled on about everything that needed to be done, Orochimaru pondered what to do. Getting blood for Kiki was the biggest. Before he had stretched the truth a little. Technically he didn't even, he just misdirected Kiki. Orochimaru was not Kiki's blood type. Kiki had in a sense been given blood _from _Orochimaru. It just wasn't Orochimaru's blood. Kiki had an _extremely_ rare blood type, AB negative. Only about 1 of the world's population had that type. Chakra could be forced out of any one of the priestesses or priests here.

Orochimaru had to admit he did over react when Kiki called out to Kaito-san. He should have saved the punishment for after she survived his branding. He smiled as a thought of causing her immense pain after this ordeal. _I have it perfectly planned out._ He began fingering a note in his pocket, thinking back to yesterday.

_I decided to visit a nearby stream to wash the blood off of myself, since I finished punishing Kiki. When I returned to the rooms, I saw Kaito about to go in. I quickly grabbed his wrist, holding in the killing intent. "Don't go in there."_

_"Doushite?"_

_"She's very sick. She can't be disturbed."_

_"Gomen. Should I get a doctor?"_

_"Iie. I have one coming."_

_"Eeto... I'll just put this under the door then."_

_My gaze was transfixed on the note in his hand. "Iie. Don't do that. It might get lost or not reach her. "_

_"Oh..."_

_"Give it to me. I'll give to her when she's up to it."_

_"Hai..."_

_He handed it to me and said his good-byes. When he was out of sight, I carefully opened it so I wouldn't make loud noises. The letter went as so:_

_Kiki-chan-_

_The time I've spent with you has been wonderful but there comes a time when all good things must end. It's not like you did anything wrong. I've just grown apart from you. I'm sure you'll find another. Someone better suited for you. It's not you, it's me. Please don't cry or get sad. This is what's best._

_-Kaito-kun_

This would destroy her.

"Orochimaru-sama I'm going to find someone with compatible blood. I'll be back soon."

"Hai-"

"Iie! Don't leave me alone with this bakemono!" Both men turned their heads in surprise just to meet the angry, in pain face of Kiki. "He'll just fuck me up worse. Then you'll need to send for a coffin, unless you plan to use my body from science. But honestly I'd rather be cremated in my village and burried in the shrine's basement."

Suddenly Kiki, clutched her stomach and gasped in pain. "Something wrong Kiki-kun?"

"Piss off."

"Such foul language and rude behavior for someone on the brink of death and whose only hope is me."

"I'll heal on my fuckin' own wounds in my own fuckin' time." She coughed up phlem-covered blood.

"I doubt that's possible. You're horribly injured," Kabuto intervened.

"Tell me how can you still be so cocky after I nearly killed you?"

"Fuck you."

I felt me smirking. "I know how to kill that enthusiasm." I handed her the letter and watched her face drain of all color. She couldn't tear her sight away. Her hands began to tremble as her eyes widened.

In a dangerously low voice Kiki murmured," Get out."

"Your in no positio-"

She looked up with anger-filled eyes and unstable chakra flaring non-stop. "G-E-T O-U-T" Kiki spelled out the command her head now bowed and covered by her hair.Orochimaru pointed a shooing motion towards Kabuto and he left silently. "I wanted you to leave more so than the medic."

"And yet that won't happen."

Tears streaked down her face as she brought her knees to her chin. "I just want to be alone. Please _just fuckin' leave! You got what you fuckin' wanted so fuck off!" _She was yelling and sobbing now. Orochimaru stared impassively at her."

**Kiki's POV:**

Why can't he just leave me alone? Why can't he-

Orochimaru walked foward and sat on the bed in front of me. He crossed his legs and continued to stare. I just sat there, unashamed of my nudity, and crying into my knees. He began to play with my hair, but acted as though it was nothing. I began whispering a song to myself, hoping to make me feel better.

_kkum sok ie pi mil teul eun mal hae  
ma ju chil seul pheum teul eul  
yong seo leul ku ha lyeo hal  
a peun ne mo seup to nae sa to_

ji chin teutta mul eo jin nun pih  
teo neun pa la ji anh a  
pi littha ke sum a teun pyeong teun yak sok I never knew...

tol i kil su to eops eul kkum  
pa lae jin na ie ki eok teul  
a pheum to mu tyeo jyeo peo lin kkae jin sim jang  
tha peo lin na ie yeong hon eun han nat sin (g)eo jin jaetteo mi  
sang cheo ka teuk chan nun mul Ha...

So tell me, tell me the reason why  
How can you do this to me  
You break my heart  
And you make me cry

So tell me, tell me the reason why  
How can you do this to me  
You break my heart  
And you make me cry

My mind suddenly flashed to the people I saw that one day when Kimimaro woke me up.

_"How could Satoshi-kun leave? It's not fair! What if h-he doesn't come back?" one of the green-haired cried._

_"It's my fault Nii-Nii left. If I wasn't so needy and pathetic he wouldn't have been fed up and left me here alone...But Nii-Nii will come back if I can show him I'm not helpless, Right?" A young blonde girl asked with a broken, desperate voice. Her voice void of emotion 'til she spoke the idea. It became hope filled._

I blinked rapidly, only to find Orochimaru on top of me, holding my blood soaked hands above my head. My neck burned horribly as the raw flesh came into contact with his hair. I squirmed.

"Stop or I'll bash your head in until you're unconscious."

"Go right ahead, you sadistic teme! It never stopped you before."

"Maybe I don't want to. You shouldn't take my pity for granted."

"I don't need your god damned pity!"

"Hmmm... A miko shouldn't take the Lord's name in vain."

"Urusei, teme." Orochimaru got up to lean against the wall. I stared in waiting expectancy. Noticing, he crushed my hope.

"I'm not leaving."

"Why not?"

"As of 5 minutes ago, your now on suicide watch. I guess I'll take the first shift."

"I'm not suicidal!"

"The evidence says otherwise."

I stared at the blood on my fingers. I wasn't sure of a comeback. I didn't want to say this sometimes happened when the headaches and weird flashbacks occurred. The last thing I wanted was Orochimaru asking me questions and prying into a past I couldn't remember. I wasn't sure what I should say period. I tried to think up a lie but came up empty-handed. "Trust me I'm not suicidal. That teme isn't worth my life."

"Does it hurt knowing you went through all that pointless suffering only to have it end up like this?"

"Of course. But still what can you do? It's just a part of life."

"You can use that jutsu and alter your memo-"

"Fuck no. It's my memory. It's crappy as hell but it's mine. I know it hurts but it'll be just as bad dealing with the emptiness erasing the memory will make me feel. Besides it's making me whoever I'll be tomorrow.

Dark chuckling erupted from Orochimaru, followed by that trade mark smirk. "And who exactly will you be tomorrow?"

"A royally pissed-off bitch"

_**WOO HOO!!! Note how fast the updates are. Praise vacation!!! That song I used was Shinkirou by Loveholic. And on another note the L, G, and S buttons are screwed up so if they don't show. Gomen. **_


	9. Confrontations

**Kiki's POV:**

Kiki had snuck out of her room in search of Kaito. She was able to only because Orochimaru was not on watch; it was a chakra exhausted Kabuto. Kabuto had used a majority of his chakra to heal her fatal wounds when he took a suicide watch shift. Most of her injuries were already corrected by her own unusual chakra, but still, she was pretty screwed up that night. Her blood problems somehow fixed itself after she had ingested 2 hemoglobin pills. Her wrist was bandaged, because broken bones have to heal on there own, and not to worsen the infection. The infection had gotten so bad, it didn't go away as quickly as most everything else. For a week or so shots had to be administered to her arm.

Focusing her attention to a bookstore in the town, she thought of Kaito. She wasn't blind with rage, carrying a vendetta, but she was pissed. That teme! It was fine he wanted to leave her, she could tell 'cause he was acting weird the other day. She chose to ignore it, and stay in denial. The thing that really pissed her off was he didn't even have the nerve to face her and do it. After everything they've been through, he abandoned her and gave himself a head-start so he wouldn't have to comfort me or see my pain.

I loved him, but I should have foreshadowed these events. When family or friends died, he was nowhere to be found. When I was sad or emotional, he avoided me like the plague. When I brought up my problems at home, he usually changed subjects. And lastly, he was compulsive. When something stuck in his mind, he went with it until he became bored. I suppose a damsel in distress didn't appeal to him anymore.

I wandered through the rows of books and scrolls. I felt as though I was looking for a particular one. I stopped in front of a section in the back and kneeled down. I took 2 books and looked at them. One was _Spirits and Demons _and the other was some book with sutras and exorcism and demons/ghosts weaknesses. I don't know what it was called because the cover was ripped off. These strange books... I'm gonna buy them for some reaon. I turned to leave when another caught my eye: _Jutsus and the Variations._ I flipped through it. It was about jutsus and how they varied in cultures, ranks, people, and chakra exerted. I wanted to buy it, but at the same time didn't. I would be buying it for Orochimaru, but why? I knew why I wanted the other books. In reality I really _was _a miko. And I was the holder of the Shikon no Tama. This and the fact I have a strong demonic aura will ensure a visit from youkai.

I was at the front desk now buying everything before I could change my mind. "How much is this?"

A girl with red hair in a bun looked up. A name tag said her name was Choco. Straightening her glasses, she looked at all my purchasings and after a moment answered," 20,654 yen."

"Sokka...anoo...hontoo?"

"Hai."

I fumbled through my pockets for the money. It was _a lot_ more than what I thought it would cost. I set the money on the counter and walked away with my books. "Chotto matte," a voice called after me.

I turned my head and stopped. "Nani?"

"Hai, doozo. You get this free for purchasing so much. Gomen, I'm new so I forgot."

"Dijoobu desu." I stared at what was placed in my hand, a journal. A nice one too. It was brown leather with red ribbon bookmark. I had no need for a diary, but I can at least draw in it. I'm a good drawer. "Arigatoo."

"And here's a bag to carry them in. It might rain soon and I wouldn't want your expensive books ruined!" The bag wasn't plastic, it was plain, navy blue and made from cotton. I set the books in neatly and smiled.

"Arigatoo. I was wondering if there's a small jewelry store nearby?"

"Hai. Just keep going down the road a little ways. You can't miss it."

"Arigatoo...again"

"Jaa ne. Oh please come again!"

A bell sang out as I opened the door. Now outside I resumed my mission to hunt down Kaito. I wanted to try a jewelry store first 'cause he was talking about getting an earing last time we talked. I took one step and was approached by a pink haired girl,"Hajimemashite. Kimi wa Nana desu. Doozo yoroshiku."

"Nana (from elfen lied)?"

"Hai. I live in the room 3 doors down (pun not intended) from your room. I've been sent to gather Koto-ikkou back at the shrine."

"Oh." I had planned to get to know the town better, but this could of been important.

"Isshouni ikimashoo" She turned away uncertainly and I followed. She was somewhat nervous, but seemed sweet. As if reading my mind she began,"Sumimasen. I'm nervous right now. I'm not shy around strangers or anything, but this situation makes me uncomfortable."

"What is the situation?"

"I'm not exactly sure but everyone is to report to the shrine immediately. It just makes me uneasy."

I understood her worry. It seemed very odd. Why wasn't anything explained? We hurried along the path in an akward silence. The sooner we get there, the better. About 1/4 of a mile away, Nana tripped on an uprooted tree root, fell in the mud, and twisted her ankle. "Nana? Can you walk on that ankle?" I knew she probably couldn't. With the damage my body had, I had no chakra to spare and it would be painful to carry her. But carrying her seemed to be the best option.

"Iie. Sumimasen for being such trouble."

"Don't worry. Climb on my back. I'll have to carry you." She nodded weakly, muttering apologies as she stumbled towards me. When I stood, I found Nana was surprisingly light. I started the journey once again and made it with no other set-backs. I stepped through those doors and called to Nana, forgetting she was right here. No answer. "Nana?" The silence worried me, so I set her down on the floor and tried to figure out the problem. Relief washed over me as I saw see was only sound asleep. I gently shook her shoulder shoulders. "Nana, wake up."

"Nnm...Papa, it's only 8:00."

"No, Nana wake up we're here now."

"Wha- OH! Sumimasen. Sumimasen. Sumimasen" Nana began repeated bowing and blubbering apologies.

"No prob. Where are we to go now? Do we meet someone?"

Confusion covered her face. "Anoo... I'm not sure." Panic swept over her features. "Wait! Follow me!" Nana stood and collasped on her knees."Itai..."

"I'll carry you again and you just point the way."

We reached a room that was already filled with people. I took the nearest available seats, which happened to be next to Orochimaru. His face stayed impassive, but those eyes smirked. The reak of blood that poured out of him, made me realize the emergency; someone was murdered. I don't know who, but the blood's scent was familiar, which meant whoever it was, I knew him or her. I was so lost in thought, I didn't notice Orochimaru staring at me.

Suddenly, he grabbed my chin and brought my face close to his. "Don't feel guilty. He dug his own grave." He dropped my face and stared forward like nothing happened. "What did you buy?"

"Eh?" I realized that I was still gripping the bag with my books. "Nothing much. Just some books..."

"I don't remember a bookstore being in that town..."

"There is one, but it's kinda shabby and hidden in the the corner."

"Hontoo? So what are they?" He wasn't asking because he was curious or suspicious, he was simply bored. He reached for the bag, which made me hold it closer to my chest.

Before I could answer, someone spoke making Orochimaru retreat his hand back on his lap. "I'm sorry for this inconvience, but something horrible happened and we need to warn people."Complete silence blanketed the room."Someone was murdered on our grounds. His body was found in the hot springs, but just his body. He was decapitated..." The man paused and cleared his throat. "We believe his head was k-ke-pt as a trophy. The victim was Asato Kaito. He was a guest visiting to see if he would to have his wedding here."

The man kept speaking, but I couldn't hear him. My stomach was twisted in knots and threatening to heave up what little breakfast I ate. _Kami-sama he had a family. They'll be in so much pain... How could Orochimaru do this?_

**Orochimaru's POV:**

Kaito-kun was dead now and I felt immensly better. I had to kill him because he made my Kiki cry. Only I could that. Besides I wasn't even planning to kill him when I ran across him in the early morning. Thinking back on everything, I pity Kiki for being tied together with all these posers.

_I sat down in the hot springs. The splashing water broke the eerie silence Orochimaru was so comfortable with. Leaning his head back, he realised he wasn't alone. Stretching his hand back, he took a kunai out of his pants and grasped it tightly. "Dare wa koko desu?" Something poppedcout of the water._

_"Gomen. I was seeing if I could hold my breath longer than 2 minutes."_

_"You are Kaito-kun?"_

_"Hai... Oh your Koto-san."_

_"Hai. Can I ask a question?" A curt nod was his response. "Why are you here?"_

_"To see about a marriage."_

_"Marriage?"_

_"Hai. To this hot, rich girl. I inherit everything when this happens since Ojiisan is ready to kick the bucket."_

_"...But what about Kiki?"_

_"I left her..." Kaito blinked as he said this almost as if it was obvious._

_"Were you ever planning to take her away when she was married?"_

_"We had a great thing going for us but, if I chose Kiki, I would be broke...homeless and starving... Boku wa Kiki Daisuki. Demo I can't live off of love."_

The way I see it, he got what he deserved. I walked to my room and bumped into to Kiki. Before I could speak, she thrust a package in my hands. "Tanjoobi omedetou," She muttered half-heartedly. She turned to walk away. I stopped her by grabbing her arm and dragging her in my room. I forced her to sit on my bed.

"I never told you when my birthday was." I traced my fingers across the white wrapping paper.

"Why did you kill him?"

"I felt like it."

"That's not a good enough reason to kill someone!"

"For me it is." I stood in a daze after I realized she had stood up and slapped me. Now her head was resting on my chest.

"What's wrong with you? You don't understand that poem, do you?"

"Maybe you should explain it to me."

"No. Figure it out on your own." She walked towards the door and I stopped her.

"Iie. Stay until I open my present."

"Kekko desu."

"Doushite?"

"Beca-" As she spoke I opened the present. It was an odd book I'd never heard of. I stared at the cover for a while then tossed to the floor, which made her flinch.

"You could just teach me a new jutsu."

"Have you mastered the first one?"

"..."

"I thought as much. Learn that one first, if you want I to learn another."

"We haven't had anymore training sessions since then. How am I to know what I'm doing wrong or need to work on if you supervise my progress?"

"I don't like being alone with you. I'm only now because if I scream someone will hear."

I couldn't help but scoff. "They didn't before."

"I wasn't screaming for help, was I?"

I watched her leave, a grin tugging at my lips. Through everything, she moaned, cried, bled, nearly died, but never did she scream. I had a powerful urge seering through my body to hear her _scream_. To she her scream because of him. He would kill anyone who would even dare to touch her.

**Kiki's POV:**

I felt ... sad that he didn't like the present. I took out my frustration on my drawing journal. I barely paid attention to what I was drawing. Why was I upset? What did I expect? Him to look at it, smile, and thank me? I was wishing for a dream world. Why wasn't I more angry at him for killing Kaito-kun? I thought of the picture in my special hope chest, of me and Kaito-kun. I should get rid of that. My hope chest was the only thing I owned that Orochimaru didn't know about. I got it from my old village when I snuck away from the transport of prisoners.

I stopped and stared, surprised, at what became of my picture. It was a picture of Orochimaru sitting in the middle of a hallway with me in his arms, being held in a loving embrace.


	10. Hopeless

**Kiki's POV:**

I stared at the picture, mezmorized and horrified. I wanted to rip it into shreds then and there but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I started to think back to all the times Orochimaru stood too close to me. Every time I accidentally brushed up against him. Everytime I stared up into those beautiful eyes... No! not that sadistic bastard! Why him? _Yin and yang. He completes you._ "He completes me," I muttered, blushing, to myself. I took my pencil and wrote the chinese symbol, 阴阳,in the corner. This was definately going in that hope chest. I didn't want him to ever see this. I'm not exactly sure why. Shouldn't, if I did in fact love him, want him to know? No. He would probably take advantage of it. _He's kissed me before. Why worry if he's already proved it? _"There's a difference between love and sex...the question is how to tell it.

In my hope chest I had mostly pictures: my family (real), my other family (adopted), my past boyfriends (and one girlfriend), and things I drew. I also had personal treaures and momentos: a harmonica (completely mutilated and broken), some necklaces and charms (I wore two in previous chapters), a baseball, a locketand pocket watch I can't open, and a rose. Every single item was given to me by friends and family with the exception of the rose.

I'm not sure where I got the rose from. When I was adopted, I had it clenched in my hand, it's thorns drawing countless tears of blood. It is, or was, actually a very rare type, but only because superstitous villagers thought it was the sign of demons, and burned them whenever they happened to find them. The once beautiful lavender coloered rose with a blood-red stem, was now mud-brown and decayed. I stared down at the journal again before closing it. "Aishiteru, reitan na, sadisuchikku teme.

**Kimimaro's POV:**

I hurried into Orochimaru's room, wondering why he asked for me. He said when we got here, we probably wouldn't see or speak to one another about private matters. I assume if he couldn't ask me earlier in the daytime. When I walked in, he was reading a book called _Jutsus and Variations. _"Orochimaru-sama?" He looked up momentarily, his eyes wary.

"Hai?" He sounded annoyed at the interruption.

"You summoned me. You said you wanted to ask me about something."

"Oh, yes. Sumimasen. This book is a lot more interesting then the cover lets on. I suppose it's true that you can't judge a book by it's cover, ne? Speaking of which, what do you think of Kiki?"

"Me? I'm not sure why you ask-"

"You the closest one to her here. You've spoken to her not as a sound shinobi, but as a civilian and a patient. It would seem you know her better." I still didn't understand, but I tried my best to describe her.

"She's... optimistic whenever she can be, and she doesn't hold grudges. She has a lot of talents and hobbies..."

"What kinds?"

"Singing...dancing...drawing...cooking weird stuff. She's also a blacksmith." I paused to see Orochimaru's expression. He wore the usual solemn one.

"Continue."

"She uses genjutsu to change her appearance somewhat."

"How so?"

"She hides scars that cover her body and a tattoo on her back. She says it's only because people ask about it and she hates to explain every story or just to receive the quizzical glances." Orochimaru closed his eyes in concentration. When he opened them, he motioned his hand to signal Kimimaro to go on.

"She sometimes visits the prisoners. She hates seeing people in pain even if it's an enemy. She has...a low opinion... of you." His fists began clenching. "And she has this trunk of som-"

"Trunk? Where did she get it from? I've never seen it before."

"Sometimes she has it out. When I ask she says 'hi-mi-tsu desu'. I don't see the relavence." Kiki never really was secretive, so Kimimaro never saw the problem. "Is it a problem?"

"No. Why wasn't I ever informed about this."

"She never acted as if it's existance was a secret."

"You said she told you it was."

"No. I meant to say she says 'hi-mi-tsu desu' when I ask about what's in it or where she got from."

Eyes narrowing and killing intent dripping from every word Orochimaru answered simply, "You may go now."

"Are you-"

"NOW."

"Hai, Orochimaru-sama."

I left then went to Kiki's room to warn Kiki that Orochimaru was in a foul mood. Since she had a compulse to madden him, I decided it would be on my conscience if she ended up dead. I opened the door without knocking and found Kiki with what looked like a book in her hands. "Kiki-san?" She looked up in surprise and immediately shoved it under the covers.

"H-hai?" Now this was obviously secretive.

"Kore wa nan desu ka."

"Nothing. Well nothing you need to see anyway."

"I wouldn't be too sure about that."

"What do you mean?"

"Orochimaru-sama is mad. Try to avoid him today or for the next few days."

"Doushite?"

"He asked about you. He was unhappy about some of the things I told him." Her face seemed anguished. She began to hug her knees.

"What did you tell him?" I told her everything word for word. Her face darkened with every passing second. After a minute of thinking, she stood. "He would be pissed..." She walked slowly to the door, standing before it she hesitated.

"Where are you going?" I furrowed my eyebrows. She was always so reckless. I hoped she wasn't doing anything stupid

"I'm going to go talk to him."

**Orochimaru's POV:**

Imagine my surprise when after Kimimaro left, not even 10 minutes later, the object of the conversation walks through the door. "Orochimaru-san I-" I swung my fist, catching her in the jaw and knocking her over. "I-" I kicked her in the stomach.

"What? What's wrong? If you have something to say? The real problem is if I beieve you, usotsuki!" I didn't care if I nearly killed her before and she was still in bad shape. I didn't even care if I killed her now. I felt so high standing over her, watching her squirm, seeing tears streak down her face, the blood dripping from her mouth. But she kept it closed. I wanted, no needed her to scream. I leaned down to her face. "Scream." She shook her head fiercely. I wrapped my hand around her throat and tightened it until I realized she wouldn't be able to make anything more than a squeak. I let go and started to bring out the Kusanagi.

"Yamete! Onegai! I didn't come for this!"

"What did you come for then?"

She sat up with a blush on her face. "I came to see something." I never saw it coming. I didn't dare to move afterwards either. In one quick move, she placed her hand on the back of my head and pushed my face foward. Our lips came into contact, and she kissed me.


	11. Digging

**Kiki's POV:**

I wanted to see what would happen. I wanted to see if there would be a spark or some sort of ... i don't know. Something to see if it was love. There was, at least on my side. He stayed there stupified, not moving for a good minute, but now I knew the truth. Finally when he did move, it broke my trance and made me realize the significance of what I did. I tried to get up and run but the pain from the previous beating, kept me in place, mortified. Orochimaru stared at me, fingers lightly touching his lips. His stunned expression turned to that of obvious outrage: sneering and grabbing my hair and forcing me to meet his piercing gaze. "Doushite? What game are you playing at?"

"I don't even know." I spoke just above a whisper. Was I playing one? I understood why he might think so. Hell, I understand why he's so mad. It probably has nothing to do with what Kimimaro told him. It's because he's confused. He talks to Kimimaro and learns some of my secrets. I come in and he starts beating me _again_. What do I do? I kiss him, a long lingering one no less. I'd probably be mad too, if I was in his spot. _Kami-sama, dasukete!_

"You don't know? How quaint. Please tell me, are you trying to be a prostitute right now? Selling your body, to not be killed? I'd say that's pretty low, especially for someone like you."

"I'm not a whore! What the hell would make you even think that?"

"Give me some credit. I'm not a stupid man. Nor do I believe in coincidences. Why is it right after I spoke with Kimimaro, you appear? Please don't stand there and say it wasn't connected."

"I didn't come to barter with my body! I was planning to drop in with or without Kimimaro showing me I needed to. All he did was convince me to come earlier."

"So why did you come?"

"I don't know what- Just forget it ever happened, okay?" I felt so humiliated and embarrassed. In that one moment when I kissed him, I wasn't thinking. I only saw him and acted. Damn my recklessness! I might not be able to stand, but I sure as hell could crawl. I scurried away to the door, but was stopped by Orochimaru pulling on my leg consequencely dislocating it. He straddled me and pinned my arms above my head. Even with the current situation of Orochimaru being angry and violent, I couldn't help but blush. He was leaning in so close to me: face to face. Our bodies were touching..."Get off of me!"

"Did I say you could leave? I don't think so. There's still a problem to sort out. Now give me a satisfactory answer or else: Doushite?"

I had no answer to give. What could I say? " What do you want me to say? I'm sorry. Bokuno basho wa wakarimashita. It won't happen again." I tried to push him off with no prevail. He stared at me the same way when we first met, studying me, only now more intently.

"That's not the right answer. Remember I warned you already so I won't feel any guilt."

"When did you start?" I was earned with a smirk but for a split-second before he pulled out the senban, his smile wasn't dark or sadistic. However when he did, shivers coursed through my spine. I blushed harder and cried out when he messed with the knot on my yukata, and eventually untied it. "Yamete! What are you doing!?" He ignored me and put the senban in his mouth. I began to try to shake out of his grasp.

He raised an eyebrow,"I'm not planning to rape you." Removing the senban, he placed it on Kiki's neck and dragged it down her chest to her stomach. A line of blood appeared and mingled with Orochimaru's saliva, causing it to burn. I flinched away from it, but that didn't help. "It'll hurt less if you don't move." I didn't understand until he pushed the needle deep in my flesh. It stung like any other wound at first, then it began burning worse and worse. I realized the other cut was burning just as bad. "If you didn't notice yet, this senban has poison on it."

"Demo, you had it in your mouth wouldn't you get poisoned too?"

"Not if the poison came from my mouth. My fangs," he opened his mouth and bared his teeth,"store it. That makes me immuned. But thank you for being worried. Everytime you say the wrong thing I push it in deeper. Say the right thing I'll pull it out some. Now I'll ask once more: Doushite watashi wa kisu shitabakari.?"

"I wanted to see what it was like..." I stopped breathing, like an automatic response to force me to stop talking,"...I wasn't really thinking...but..." I couldn't go on. I wouldn't!

"But what?" I dug my nails in my palms as he pulled out the needle a little.

_Keep going!!! You've gotten this far already._

_IIE! Stop and run...or crawl...just get away!_

_Running's not going to solve anything._

_And staying will get you a casket. In case you need to know, you're over 5 feet tall._

My mind began waging wars with itself. The cowardly side was winning me over. But neither was right. But then again neither was wrong. I couldn't tell him. Not now. I just wasn't ready, but I screwed up by going this far along. I swallowed and made a decision.

I began mouthing out words.He leaned in close trying to hear me, so I made my move. I banged my head against his and when he let his guard down, I pushed him off. Bearing the pain, I forced my leg back in it's proper place, stood, and ran to my room. My yukata became stuck on a loose nail and ripped part of it off. I looked down at my exposed thigh, and pulled the yukata closed, but it didn't help because it ripped too high up. Finally I saw my door and with my second wind ran forward with all the remaining energy. When I opened the door, I collapsed on the floor. My breast was hurting, the pain so intense I couldn't move. I heard the approaching footsteps and began to silently cry.

_Is this how I die?_ The second these thoughts came to mind, I realized that I sensed no anger and that I hadn't for a while. _But- So why did he do all that if he wasn't mad? _

Kaji's voice broke in to answer,"_ He's a sadistic bastard. What did you expect? If it comforts you, you really turn him on. He's intoxicated by all your pain."_

_"Urusei. You know damn well that helps nothing."_ I ignored her and focused on...Orochimaru looming over me, standing in the doorway.

"Auhhk," I weird mewling sound escaped my lips. I didn't know why, but I couldn't speak. My throat burned. Everything burned. It was getting so hot, it was hard to breathe. Dear Lord! I'm on fire! I'm burning alive!

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I knew she wouldn't go far, but I activated the curse mark to subdue her anyway. My work was cut out for me though; the poison was taking full effect. I stood for a moment watching her squirm, before withdrawing a vial from my pocket. "I admire your spirit, but that was very reckless of you. Kiki? Kikoeru ka." I pulled her closer to me and on instinct put one arm around my neck, the other around my waist to support herself. "Drink this."She shook her head with such vigor, I couldn't get I clear look at her fear-stricken face. "Why not?"

"Nahnmumn." She wasn't able to speak and could barely move. The poison was preparing to take full affect. I gritted my teeth, unaware I was grinding them. The second I showed signs of frustration, she shrunk back in fear. Sighing, it suddenly dawned on me that I probably had no other option.

"Drink this or else you'll die." When she once refused, I drank the vial. Before she could notice, I pushed her on her back and kissed her. Using my tongue to pry open the entrance, I forced in the medicine and it easily slid down her throat. Then I picked her up bridal style and set her on the bed. I ran my hand up her inner thigh, and stopped short of her area. Convincing myself my intentions were pure, moved her yukata away from her top half and traced her branding.

"Why did you give me that?" A cracked voice weezed. "Why do you try to kill me? Why did you kill Kaito-kun? Why are you like this?" Her eyes faded some, but I graciously answered before she blacked out.

"Why should I answer?"

She grabbed my hair and pulled it so hard, I ended up laying next to her. "Answer me! I need to know..." Her hand moved to my face, and clawed it, leaving three red scars. Her knee made contact with my stomach and pressed me against the wall. "Onegai..." Her voice faded and she lay in a peaceful slumber.

"Keep digging your grave, and I'll do the honor of pushing you in myself." I stayed where I was, not wanting to move until I was forced.

_W__ Author Note: 1 I forgot my place. 2Why did you kiss me? 3Can you hear me?_

**OKAY NOW! Not my best chapter sorry. Temporary writers block. I wrote definitions of some of the japanese stuff. now review everyone. Oh, I'm only updating frequently because it's break so enjoy this while it lasts. Tell me what you think of this chapter please. I'm not too sure of it.**


	12. The Unavoidable

**Kiki's POV:**

I was woken up, in Orochimaru's arms, by Kimimaro. I guess he was so worried, he thought he should check up on me. I adjusted my eyes to the morning light, and noticed 2 things: Kimimaro craddling something in his arms and that there was no morning light. I sat up and realized it was Jinta. (The pet fox mentioned from an earlier chappie.) I extended out my arms, but he jumped in them before I could grab him, and snuggled close. It was wonderful to see such a friendly, familiar face! "Kimimaro, where did you find him? Was he here? And what time is it?"

"Iie, he followed me back when I went to fetch Kabuto-senpai from Otogakure. And you two have been asleep for a whole day." Jinta never was one for traveling, but it comforted me to know he thought I was worth it. I wasn't surprised that I was asleep for so long. I taken a real beating and it was such a wonderful feeling to be in the same bed... Bad thoughts...

A problem came to mind as a rustling sound made me turn around; Orochimaru didn't know about Jinta and with his questionable stability, I didn't know how he would react. Turning to Kimimaro, I saw him blush and keep interest in the ceiling. I blinked. Once. Twice. "Is something wrong?"

"I didn't mean... I- Your clothes." My yukata was still open and torn, but I had nothing to change into. I did my best to cover myself, but my leg was still exposed. I took a blanket and placed it on my lap.

"Since when did you care? You don't have a crush on me, do you?" I was just teasing but he blushed and looked at my feet, slowly shaking his head.

"Iie. I think of you more like the mother I never had. It's just indecent to see a woman like that. I'm going to go find information for the mission now." He turned and walked away, leaving once again alone with Orochimaru. I went to lay down, but my stomach growled, protesting going back to sleep. I leaned down to his face and kissed his forehead. Feeling light-headed, I stood up and went to the kitchen.

**12 minutes later...**

I went back to the room with a tray filled with lots of sushi and kin ni lou. I made some extra for when Orochimaru awoke, but I wasn't planning anything romantic. It's not like I was hoping to have dinner in bed together, hands accidentally joining, blushing, fulfilling conversations, a beautiful kiss, then a nice time in bed... I would never dream of it!

I opened the door, and saw Orochimaru standing there _completely_ _naked!_ Apparently he woke up and tried to change into new clothes. I stayed in place, not noticing that I wasn't making eye contact with the right head. _Nice..._"See something you like? I'm truly happy for you, but it's quite rude to stare."

"I-You- Gomenasai! Sumimasen! I'll go now." I ran out, a blush burning my face. oh Kami-sama! What the hell!? How am I suppose to face him or stay here now? I need to concentrate and calm down. Orochimaru will no doubt taunt me with this for a while but I can't let that show. I'll just avoid him until-

"Kiki-chan, you can come in now." Orochimaru had the door open and his arm around my shoulder. A tongue snaked out of his mouth and ran down my chest. He quickly retracted it when Jinta popped up and bit it. He tried to catch and snap his neck, but I stopped him.

"Kore wa Jinta desu. Jinta bokuno petto desu. Can I keep him?" I wasn't sure what Orochimaru would say, but I expected no.

"Iie. So what do you plan to do?"

"Keep him, protect him, and take the beating for my insolence." I felt his shoulders shake with laughter. He moved my hair and kissed my neck softly.

"Have I become so predictable? I suppose you understand me now, is that it?"

"I'll never understand you. You're too complex. All I know is you have an unquenchable thirst for knowledge and if anyone defies you, you won't hesitate to punish them." He fiddled with my hair and I felt static going through my spine and I whispered, "I wish I could..."

We stayed in the hallway, standing in silence until Orochimaru said, "That food looks good. Is there enough for two?" I just nodded. He led me in the room but we kept the silence. I stared at him a second. I really did want to understand him. But how could I?

_Look in his soul. Thats the only way unless you wanna get him drunk. _Kaji cheered that idea on. _Getting him drunk would sure be more fun._

_No. Besides if he catches me in his mind who knows what he'll do._

_Okay, then ask before you do._

_You don't seriously think he'd agree, do you?_

_Maybe, maybe not. No harm in asking._

_With him, there is..._

I stared at his face, examining every detail. He was a beautiful man. "Orochimaru..." He looked up for a second, but thats all it took. I cupped my hands around his face and brought our foreheads together, but while keeping my eyes closed. "I want to understand you even if it's just a little more than I do now. Can I?"

He began kissing me and I kissed back. I moved my arm around his neck. When the kiss broke, I pushed him away. "That wasn't what I meant..."

"Is that so? Well, if you can be my guest." I closed my eyes again, rested my head against his chest, and entered into his mind.

**A/N: I end the chapter here for a topic for next chapter. Those Japanese sentences mean,** '**This is Jinta. Jinta is my pet. Read and review. Any suggestions accepted and sorry it seems so short.**


	13. Orochimaru's Mind

I stared around Orochimaru's mind. It was dark, cold, and moist. I shivered, but mostly because his mind scared me. So far just from seeing these surroundings, it seemed exactly like his personality on the outside. _Why is he so dark? And where are the corridors or rooms? And why do I feel so lonely here...Is this how Orochimaru feels all the time?_

_How could you even think that? I have many people surrounding me. Besides I don't care, therefore I couldn't really be._ I whirled around only to see Orochimaru smirking. _This is a marvelous technique. It allows the user to enter someone's mind and...search through memories, I presume?What surprises me is we can talk without talking. Telepathy is it?_

_Hai... How are you here?_

_That jutsu tried to supress my consciousness, but I'm very much stronger than you, even if I don't know the techniques you use. Besides I came to check what you were going to look at. I don't want you seeing something you don't need to see. But I'm curious, what were you planning on doing in here? And were you going to tell me about this?_

_I wanted to understand you more, but I already told you that and you said I could. But as for the method, no, I probably wouldn't have mentioned it. _Even though I knew it would make him mad, I turned from him and began to walk around. A sudden burst hit me and I fell on my stomach.

_This is my mind. I can hurt you without needing to touch. Now you're not going anywhere without me, I've made complete sure of that._

I realized that, here, it was impossible or suicide to disobey him, since he controlled everything._ Sumimasen, Orochimaru-sama. May we go now?_

He began to laugh, but stopped long enough to beckon me. I silently walked over to him without question. He grabbed my arm roughly and softly bit one of my fingers (but not hard enough to pierce the skin). _Why are you being so obediant? It isn't like you. _He moved his eyes to my face, glaring in expectancy.

_I was serious when I said I wanted to understand you. If listening and doing whatever you ask is what it takes, I'll do it. I just want to know. Onegai?_

Orochimaru closed his eyes and began to slowly suck on my finger. A fang grazed it and blood trickle out the corner of his mouth. I couldn't help but quietly moan. Before his touches sickened me, now I wanted each one he gave me to never end. The noise made him open his eyes; they looked so calm and soft. _Ikimashoo._ The single room we were in began to warp and melt, creating numerous hallways and revealing iron-bolted doors. _Which would you like to see_ _first?_

_Shirimasen. Which do you want to start with. I'll let you choose. _I looked around at the new expansions. It basically looked the same, but larger and a lot less dim.

_I suppose we start at the beginning. _He began walking and I followed him. In front of us, a rusted door with a padlock stood, but they was no opening to put a key in. All Orochimaru did was touch it and it fell open. A faded, but bright, scene covered the area as far as the eye could see. We had entered his earliest memory, of his father.

_Where's your mother?_

_Her name was Kazuma. She died during my childbirth._

_Gomenasai. _He turned to me and raised an eyebrow.

_Gomen? Doushite? It's her own fault for being to weak to live on. _Her own fault? How could he blame childbirth complications on her being to weak?

_Very simply. Remember I can hear your thoughts here. If she was stronger, she would be alive serving as a first class koinichi._

_If she was alive, she probably would have killed herself by now. Bet she never meant to sacrifice her life to an S class criminal..._ Orochimaru slapped me so hard, my head hit his table from the ongoing memory.

_Shitte imasu. I just thought it might be something you should know. Then again, have you heard the phrase, turning over in your grave?_ I did't care if we left this memory. All it showed was Orochimaru reading a school textbook, his sober and kind father serving dinner and asking what happened in school today? _You have a great father._

_Had. He was too weak and killed by some rouge nin. I'm not sure why Kazuma saw anything in him. He never was a ninja, never even went to the academy, not too bright either._

_What? _The memory changed into when he graduated and was placed in Sarutobi's team. Jiraiya threw a smoke bomb at him after making a comment about Tsunade's boobs. He was punched into the wall and Orochimaru was happily in the corner, evading the smoke. _I could tell you were getting bored of that memory._

_Jiraiya's an idiot._

_I can agree with that. _

The memory changed to their first mission, a D class that turned A. It was a drop-off and pick-up mission, which went through a suddenly erupted war zone. They had to kill all of the many people who attacked. The street were literally flooded with puddles of blood. I saw Orochimaru with blood-streaked clothes, standing over a man choking on his on blood. "Boku wa korosu." The man was barely able to say. No movement was made. "For the love of christ! Don't just stan-" He started to choke and squirm and claw, with pleading, desperate eyes. _He was my first kill._

_Dear! Wh- You were so young!_

_So? I'm proud of it._

_How could you be-_

_Thats the way the world works. You're either too weak or strong enough to survive. I've learned every jutsu known to man and discovered many they didn't know all to survive! Every man that died is proof! You can go and dream your idealities of a perfect world, but they don't, nor will they ever exist._

_I pity you._ With that, I left understanding him perfectly. He learns the jutsus to survive, fearing death after watching so many die and the dying begging for life. In his belief, without jutsus he is nothing but a target. So many years of the way of the ninja, corrupting and destroying his mind. He truly is one to pity.

**Read and review you might not get an update tomorrow, sorry. But definitions. Shitte imasu-I know. Boku wa korosu.-Kill me. And I want to thank all those who reviewed. I love you!!! You people really make my day especially cause I don't know how well my writing is... THANK YOU! ummm... Say how much you like this one!**


	14. Decisions

Maybe it was rash of me. Maybe I over reacted. Okay, I know I did, but still... I'm getting way too ahead of myself. I suppose I should start by saying what happened after I left Orochimaru's mind. After I left his mind, I left the room immediately. Usually when I used that technique, the guy whose mind I entered, would be knocked out for a few hours. Then again normally people couldn't hurt me or tag along when I searched their minds. I had no idea when Orochimaru might wake up so I guessed the sooner I ran for it, the better, just to be on the safe side.

I know I didn't have many options and no matter where I went here, I would eventually be found. Eventually. I needed a temperary hide-out for now, but only until things die down. My first try was Kimimaro's room. I knocked on the door wondering if he was still asleep. It was morning now, which meant I had been in Orochimaru's mind for maybe 7 hours. Kimimaro opened the door and stared at me. "Hai, Kiki-san? Did you need something?"

My face became flushed. How could I explain this situation? "Anoo...I need to ask a small favor. I may have upset Orochimaru...sama and I was wondering if I could stay here until he forgets about it? It would only be for a little bit!"

"Hai. You can stay here. Demo if Orochimaru-sama comes and asks about your whereabouts I'll have to tell him. I won't tell him if he doesn't bring it up though."

"Thats okay. I sorta need long term cover. I mean a can't-tell-no matter-what hide-out."

"Gomenasai."

"Dijoobu desu. I'll find somewhere else, and I promise not to tell you. Jaa ne." I tried to think of anyone else who I knew here and could stay with. I didn't know any...except Nana! It was worth a shot to at least try. She said she lived very close to me, so it should be easy to find and get to! _Unless Orochimaru woke up and notices you trying to sneak pass. That might put a damper on things._ Who cares? From a logical perspective, I'm possibly screwed no matter what way I do this.

I walked quietly by my room and stared in. Orochimaru was still asleep, but I could tell barely by the way he was turning in his sleep. I hurried down 4 doors and knocked. I woman I never saw before answered. I was very surprised to see her, not because I thought Nana would be here, but because overall, she looked like a class A slut. Cheap, overused make-up, sake clasped in her right hand, big breasts displayed for all to see, and a leg exposed, just enough to show how nice they are and yet trying to tempt you to see the rest. "Sumimasen? Nana doko?"

"Your at the wrong room. Nana's right next door." She extended her hand in distaste as though she were forced. "I'm Fuiro."

"Ohayoo! I'm Kiki. Sorry for bothering you. May I ask why you're here?"

She gave me an amused look that made me think she was trying to make me feel inferior. "I work here. I, too, happen to be a shrine maiden." I was surprised before, but this really took the cake.

"Hontoo? You- I mean, the owner never mentioned you when she talked about the other helpers..."

"Is that all?" I said yes and she closed the door without so much as a good-bye. I went next door and knocked there. I was once again surprised. Opening the door was Kabuto.

"Kabuto? Why are you here?"

"Her ankle was twisted. Apparently, I'm the only one who is available medical-wise." In the background, Nana was poking her head in the doorframe trying to see who it was. I saw that Kabuto had bandaged her leg a bit.

"Hi, Nana. I'm Kiki. Remember we met the other day, when you were sent out to assemble everyone because...Nana? I have a big favor to ask of you." After explaining everything to Nana, she let me stay. She was a kind hostess: she let me borrow her clothes, she showed me around, cooked food for me. Honestly, I think Nana was happier with me. I guess I cured her loneliness.

Three days had passed and everything was going great. Everything felt so perfect, until I saw them together. It was nothing really. Me and Nana were going to hang the laundry to dry and I bumped into Fuiro, knocking both of us over. "Kiki-kun, you need to be more aware of your surroundings if you want to stop being so klutsy." I tore my glance from a scowling banshee, to stare at Orochimaru.

"Ah! Sumimasen Koto-san! Sumimasen Fuiro-san! I'll be sure to pay closer attention." I hurriedly pulled Fuiro off the floor and bowed.

Orochimaru chuckled while moving his eyes between us. "I take it the two of you have already met?"

Desperate for all of his attention, Fuiro spoke. "Hai. She was trying to find Nana's room but accidentally found mine a-"

"Nana? Is that where you've been hiding all this time? You never strayed very far and yet here I was worrying about you." He spoke with an exasperated tone, but anger dripped from each word, if you bothered to listen enough. He ran his hand through his hair and let out a sigh.

"I wasn't hiding, merely skillfully avoiding. If you want I'll come visit you after my chores are done."

A huge grin covered his face. "I will hold you to that Kiki-chan." As they walked off, the skank entwined their arms together and rested her head on his shoulder. The worst of it was Orochimaru had draped _his_ arm around _her_ shoulder! I couldn't help the pangs of jealousy scorching my chest. I felt somewhat betrayed even though we weren't in a relationship. Hell, we weren't lovers or friends either. _So what are we?_

An hour later, Fuiro walked up to me with a triumphant smile on her face. " That date you had with Koto-kun is cancelled. Gomen. We've made plans for tonight and tomorrow." The stinging was back. I couldn't understand this. I'm bothered by Orochimaru making dates and things but it' not my concern. Love? Here with him, it was worthless. I let the situation slide.

At night, I heard a noise come from outside Nana's room. Peeking out, I saw Orochimaru kissing Fuiro goodnight on the lips. When the kiss ended and she closed the door, he saw me. Not wanting to look like I had been spying, I kept a calm face and talked about earlier that day. "Koto-san, should we reschedule that meeting or are you over it?"

He slid his hand on my shoulder with a genuine smile plastered on his face. "I'm in a good mood today, so your off the hook." I muttered a goodnight and tried to close the door, but Orochimaru put his hand in the way and forced it open. "Aren't you going to thank me? I am being quite generous today. Don't I deserve one?"

"You deserve it, but I'm not giving it to you."

""May I ask why?"

"You're in a good mood today. I can get away with it." Just like that, the door closed, I went peacefully to sleep, and dreamed of Takeda. Takeda was an imaginary friend I had as a child, though I'm positive he wasn't imaginary. Kids, at first made fun of me, and asked,"If he's real how come only you can see him?"

I always would yell back loud and crying. "Takeda-san says it's because he doesn't want anyone else to see him and he hasn't fed enough to maintain a physical form!" Kids really began avoiding me then, so I had no one to play with except Takeda. Which led me to another reason to believe that I didn't make him up; he was a tad creepy looking. He had sharp fangs and slitted eyes. Not like Orochimaru's whose pupils are slitted. His eyes are just slits. He had spiky, short black hair, was tall, and was always patting my head and laughing. The weird thing is he was around a lot when I lost control of Kaji...

I woke up in a cold sweat,breathing deep. I couldn't recall my dream, but a horribe feeling swept over me. I stretched, put on clothes, and left contemplating the dream. "Kiki-san? Can you come here for a minute?" It was Fuiro calling me to her room. I moved quickly, feeling and looking like crap. When I got there, Fuiro and Orochimaru were sitting on the bed. "We're hungry. Be a deary and go fetch us some ice-cream. Vanilla."

"Hai." I turned to trudge away and play this confused bitch's servant.

"Matte. Are you feeling okay? You don't look too good."

"Just a nightmare." I wished I still had my medication. They were sleeping pills and dream repressants. I took one each night to stop having things like this happen, but Otogakure didn't have any. I checked many times over. "I'll go now."

I looked for ice-cream and found there wasn't any, so I had to go into town and buy some...with my own money. I searched through 6 stores before I found vanilla. Finally I got back and fixed up the bowls. It had only taken half an hour because I ran myself silly trying to hurry. I delivered the ice-cream only to see...something I shouldn't of.

The door was open, so it wasn't like I meant to look. I guess they didn't bother to close it since not many passed by. Orochimaru was bent over a chest of drawers, clutching the sides, moaning, and squirming for the wonderful blow job Fuiro was giving him. I dropped the bowls and ran. "Sumimasen!"

I ran to my room and tossed my belongings into a bag. I jumped out the window and ran into the forests. I ran because now I could never face up to him again. Thats why I am where I am now. In some man's bed, with a fever of 103, continually reliving nightmares a new. Each killing me inside, the way seeing Orochimaru like that did.


	15. Consequences

I whimpered softly. I felt like I was on fire and chills rippled through my body at the same time. What's worse, behind the man taking care of me, Takeda stood watching in concern. _Don't worry Kiki-chan. I'll Keep you safe._ Takeda's voice echoed through my mind. Believing him, I stared at Mister, who was stiff and looking over his shoulder every 5 seconds like some schitzo. "Dare?" This man, did he see him? No, who ever did? So who was he? I only remember he found me collapsed on a path.

"Me? I'm... I don't remember. I've been alone with no company for so long, I forgot." The man stayed in thought while wetting a wash cloth for my head. "I need to bring your temperature down, so sorry if your uncomfortable. What's yours? Your name I mean."

"Watashi? I'm Kiki. I can't stay here, and call you mister all the time... Can I call you...Rei-kun?" A croaking noise what was my voice now. An eerie silence crossed the room afterwards. I stared at his face. He had a large quantity of grime covering his entire body. He had short, green, scruffy hair and stubby chin hair. An unique quality was his eyes; red and cat-like. His height matched Takeda's. Noticing the persisting silence, I broke it. "If you want I could call you something else."

"Iie. Thats not it. I love the name. It just feels weird in here. Like someone else is around." I let my eyes drift, unnoticed, to Takeda. _Don't tell him. Remember what happened last time._ He got up to the kitchen and brought back a tray with a bowl of clam chowder. "I've some food being made separately. Cold food and dessert."

"Arigatoo. You're such a nice man to be taking care of a complete stranger. I don't have anything to repay you with."

"Thats okay. It gets lonely out here. It's nice to have company."

"I understand, but why are you here all by yourself?"

"I can't even recall that. It's weird, but I don't remember much and if I talk about it, it makes me feel...odd." Of course I sympathized with him. I know how i feel just to think about all the times my memory was blanked. _He's just like me..._

**Orochimaru's POV:**

Kiki had run away and I spent and was still spending all my time to find her. I don't understand it! Why did she run off? She forgot about Iro so soon after seeing me and Fuiro together. Fuiro was a seductress who had been at the shrine for 4 years. In a way, I seducted her and found out many things. The only reason she's alive now is I might have further use for her. Besides, there was a wonderful brightside!

After Kiki dropped the dishes and ran, I tried to chase her, but the little slut stopped me. I didn't think she would run away! So I stayed in bed with Fuiro for an hour. When we finished, I went to Kiki's room amused, but quickly became angry and frustrated. It was obvious what she had done. Everything of hers was gone.

When I found Kiki, she would be _screaming._ She would be begging me to kill her if she did survive the torture. Would I give her such mercy? No. No. No. She'll be broken and powerless when I was finished with her. I'll make sure of it. The trail she left led into the forest, but was growing scarce. I finally found an endpoint in the middle of nowhere, and noticed someone else's trail go on from there. I followed that for about an hour and guess what...

**Kiki POV:**

I was on my way out because I felt 100 better. I'd vomitted a little and was too weak to stand at first, but I was over it now. Rei had taken good care of me, sorta like a father. I was even given new clothes to replace my ratty shrine maiden outfit. A much too big T-shirt and green camos. "I'm going now." I felt sad to leave my new friend, but I needed to get back to the lair to save Iro-kun.

"Hai. Sayonara." His voice sounded sullen and his eyes expressed utter meloncholy. He calmly forced a smile and waved.

"Sayonara." I waved back and stepped back into the not-so-merciful forest. I wasn't far down a new path when felt something off and realized I forgot my backpack. I ran into the house to get it but stopped when I saw Rei crying at the table. Tears ran down his face with no sign of letting up. Honestly, it looked as though he didn't even know he was crying. His face wasn't in his hands. His shoulders weren't shaking uncontrollably. He was just sitting there, hands on a cup of hot tea, tears slipping down. I could tell he didn't notice me yet.

"Why are you crying Rei-kun?" His head jerked in my direction, eyes wide with surprise.

"You- I'm...crying?" He reached up and touched the water on his cheek. "I didn't realize..." His voice trailed off when he felt my hand holding his face. I took out a piece of wedding kimono that I made into a hankerchief and wiped his face carefully, until he was completely dry.

"Why are you crying Rei-kun?" I repeated myself and looked him straight in the eyes. I think I knew why but I had to confirm it.

"Sumimasen. You know, living alone it's something you get used to. But when loneliness goes away, it takes awhile to get over when it comes back. I've been alone for so long and the time when possibly I wasn't alone, I can't remember." Now he put his hand to his face as tears began to pour. Now his shoulders shook as sobs broke free. "Itsumo hitori. I have no use in this world. Sometimes I questioned whether I am or was ever loved. I questioned whether I should be alive. I don't want to be alone anymore. I don't want to live like this anymore. Doushite... Doushite?"

I stayed silent for a second. "Boku wa Rei-kun daisuki. You saved my life. Without you, I would be rotting under some tree. If your feel alone come with me. Until your loneliness goes away, I'll stay by your side." I wiped his face again and kissed his forehead. "Come on. Let's go find a home."

**Sorry it's short. Boku wa Rei-kun daisuki- I love Rei. Itsumo hitori- Always alone. Review please. I'll have another chapter up tomorrow so don't complain about the size.**


	16. Compromise

"Hogosha tenshi." Rei whispered it but I heard. It made me blush. Watashi? Hogosha tenshi? I'm I really that much of a saint though? Thoughts of Orochimaru clouded my mind for a second before receding. I didn't need to think about him now of all times. I was breaking free from him and starting over with my new friend. I looked up and watched Rei pack a few essential items into a red pack. I thought what I needed to bring: food, water, money, clothes, and my hand-made map to Iro and my hope chest. We were ready now.

"Ikimashoo."

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I saw Kiki through a windowkissing some old man, and preparing to runaway with him. She was pissing me off now. I waited by the door for her to leave with many detailed scenarios playing over and over in my head. When the door opened and Kiki walked out, I restrained myself from killing her there. "Kiki-chan, I've been looking everywhere for you. Who's your friend?" That look of fear on her face was absolutely _delicious._ "Well introduce me."

She made no hesitating mistake and immediately grabbed that man's hand and attempted to run away. How cute. She must be either flimsy in the head or suddenly forgetful when she sees me, otherwise she'd understand it was futile. I activated the curse seal and watched her collapse at my feet. The man quickly realized I was no friend. "Kiki! What did you do to her!"

"What's your name and what are you doing with Kiki?" He was on his knees with Kiki trying to help her. I doubt he was listening. "You should answer me or else she'll get worse." To emphasize my point I increased the pain. I heard Kiki cry out in pain and saw her clutching her breast. He held her shoulders and tried to get her to tell him what was wrong. "Answer."

"I'm Rei! Kiki watakushi no Hogosha tenshi desu! What the hell are you doing to her? Can't you see how much pain she's in? Yamete kudasai ima!" The pathetic teme was crying like a baby. He looked like a homeless bum who had built this hut 11 years ago. I was going to be nice and leave him alive...barely maybe, but still.

"She's your guardian angel? How funny. What do you know about her? She belongs to me and I need to take her back now." I moved to pick her up but Rei wrapped his arms around her and pulled her as close to his chest as possible. He acted as if she was _his!_ "SHE IS MINE!" I kept kicking him and kicking him but he would let go."LET GO! SHE IS MINE!"

"SHE'S A PERSON! SHE DOESN"T BELONG TO ANYONE!" I picked her up by her collar and dragged her away. The man was still holding on to her with the little strength he had left. I turned at him angry but responsibly vented it by putting into action one of my wonderful ideas.

"Well, if your coming with us, you won't need this eyesore anymore. I hope you don't mind me fixing it up a bit." I dropped Kiki, knowing he didn't have enough energy to runaway and carry her. I made several hand signs and took a deep breath. The next instant the fire grew to a point where soon the whole forest woud light up. But to see that pained expression on that fucker's face made everything okay. I turned and dashed from the flames, with my smirk never fading. By the time we got back to the shrine, both were bloody and unconscious. No questions were asked as I dumped the two, what looked like, corpses in Kiki's room. I was going to have fun when she woke up. I gave that man a long, hard stare and kicked him one last time before leaving.

**Rei's POV:**

I woke up groggily. Everything was out of focus. My vision was slowing healing and my first sight was Kiki looking as though she was taken from the grave. Mud, dried blood, scars (deep and shallow) leaves, and twigs riddled her body. I tried to use chakra to heal her, but I had none left since my body had completely fixed itself. Coughing, I checked her pulse; it was fine. It seemed like her chakra was busy too. I picked her up and set her on the bed. I used a dampened washcloth from the connecting bathroom and wiped away the blood and removed the twigs and leaves. Thread and needles sat conveniently at the top of the inside of her bag. I found bandages and bandaged the freshly stitched wounds.

I stood and stepped out of the room and met the golden eyes of the man who hurt my hogosha tenshi. What could I do? "Leave her alone. Go near her, I'll kill you." He laughed, and that look in his eyes... That of a madman.

"Is that so? How? Do tell, I'm interested to know." I stayed silent, making him laugh again. "You think you can? That's not something you can ever accomplish in this lifetime." I was too slow. I saw the kunai but didn't react. I just stood and in the last moment, I prayed to my tenshi to save me. I saw the blood drip and staggered back, shifting my weight to rest my back on the wall. "Kiki... you saved me..."

**Kiki's POV:**

"Please don't do it..." I felt the blood drip down my arm. I stopped the blade Orochimaru was tossing to Rei with my hand. I moved close to his face and whispered softly in his ear "Please Orochimaru-kun... You know this doesn't have to with Rei-san. Lets go to your room and talk about this." I kissed his ear trying to be seductive. How ironic that I turn into the slut that caused me to be in this situation. A smirk crossed his face as he took my hand and led me to his bedroom.

When inside, he leaned on the wall and stared at me with that damn smirk. "Orochimaru... I don't belong to Rei or you. You can be pissed off all you want but learn to live with that fact." _By the pricking of my thumbs something wicked this way comes. _I felt a whack to my face. "I don't care if I love you! I'm not going to be treated as a slave. Or have my friends and family in danger because you're so possesive and selfish! Kill me. Beat me. Do whatever you want, but leave others out of it!" I covered my face and waited for the blow. A minute passed and nothing. Going against my better judgement, I looked up to meet Orochimaru's gaze.

He was staring at me. Not moving. Not yelling, just staring."Why did you kiss me the other day?" I blinked. Why did he bring that up?

"Don't you still think it was to stop you from killing me."

"What's the real reason?" De ja vu. Why is this discussion so hard to drop?

"What do you want me to say?"

"The truth. Five minutes ago you said you love me. Is that it?"

I almost choked. "Love!? I never-"

"Think back." And retrace I did. _I don't care if I love you... If I love you..._ I love you... CRAP.

I didn't know what to do. "I- mistake...wasn't thinking straight. I-" He moved close and forced our bodies together. He studied me. Every reaction. He kissed me. I tried to push him away, the vision of Orochimaru panting because of Fuiro playing over and over again. "Yamete! Get off of me!" I kept trying to push him away, but he just pushed back.

He threw me to the floor and kissed me. He pinned my arms above my head and tried to rip my shirt off with his teeth. For a second a thought popped into my head. _He's going to rape me. _

**I'm sorry for short updates!!! I feel bad. review. Hogosha tenshi- guardian angel. WOW! Orochimaru's fans sure turned quickly. **


	17. Competition

Orochimaru bit down on my nipple and sucked hard. I was moaning against the thoughts of grief that caused my tears. I got my arm loose and swung him into the wall. "What the hell are you doing?" Deep breaths racked my body along with a burning between my legs. After this, I still wanted him, but I had control over my lust. I wasn't putting out until I was sure a little crush was true love.

"I was giving you want you wanted. You kiss me and expect nothing to happen? What do you want from me?" I wanted what he couldn't give me: love, a relationship, marriage, a baby. Happiness. "Why don't you ever sing for me?" He kept changing subjects, but this I had an answer for.

"I don't feel like it. I can't see a song when I see you."I figured it would probably be hard for him to understand, but it was the truth. My songs are special from the heart. I can't just make up one and start singing whenever. But Orochimaru... emptiness. That's all I see. I wish I could see one... I'm not sure what I could do about it right now.

"Why? If you love me shouldn't you be able to see one?" He had a point. So maybe this was just a crush... But I knew that wasn't the case. I was forcing myself to not see the song, because I was scared of what I might see. I still wish I could see one, but at the same time I don't.

"Who says I do? It's just a stupid crush. It'll go away soon and I'll find a relationship when you drop dead." He started laughing hysterically. "I never said I'd be the one to kill you. You're... what? 26 now? In 70 years at the very most you'll drop dead...and I'd be an old hag..." The laughing would stop.

"You don't know who I am, do you? I am the legendary sannin! I am immortal! I can never die. No one can kill me. You don't have to grow old either. If you behave and pledge your loyalty, I can make you immortal too. I use a simple jutsu and you can be by my side." That required commitment and I'm not doing that. I need some from him too. Relationships can't be one sided. Then what happens when he gets bored of me? My guess is that jutsu isn't exactly perfect if he needs... what was it Kimimaro said? Containers.

"What are containers?"

"They are bodies in which I transfer my soul into. The way the jutsu works is you find a healthy body to take and in 3 years you transfer out again. Your form will take over eventually, so you won't look like the host all the time." Lord! He's _sick._

"These aren't bodies or containers or hosts damnit! These are people! They have a right to live! Stop acting as though your better then them! Is that why you think you can keep living? You're probably lower then them!" He shoved me roughly against the wall, his arm crushing my neck to hold me in place. "You're a virus... They take hosts to survive. They can't be killed, but eventually they'll expire."

"If I'm a virus, how do you plan to keep me under control?"

"I can't... I'm not as strong as you and i might not be as strong as your followers, but I can stop you in my own way whenever I think of something. At least that way I feel less guilty." He smirked and moved his arm.

"As if you could... I'm glad you're packed we're leaving soon. Meet us outside at 6:00 a.m. tomorrow." He strode to the door in an atempt to leave.

"Rei is coming with us." He stopped and turned his head.

"Since when do you make decisions? You're just a shinobi who follows orders. You have no say in anything, not even in your own well-being."

"He's coming whether you like it or not. He's my successor. I'm willing to play rock, paper, scissors for him." I won. All 3 rounds. IN HIS FACE!!! On a more serious note Rei was happy to come with me.

Now with everything settled, I had to do one thing; when we first came here this path that entranced me so. All this time here and I never had an opportunity to explore it. I stepped outside at 4:00 a.m., 2 hours early from departure time, and stood in front of the path. It hadn't changed. It was still as mysterious and over-grown and attention drawing. Taking deep breaths, I stepped forward, only to be stopped by a mewling noise. I spun around and saw nothing. Pawing on my leg, drove my head down to stare at Jinta. "You want to come with me?"

"Auw!" That meant yes. I picked him up and placed him on my head. When he got comfortable, I continued my quest. "Susume." I muttered. The path wasn't anything spectacular. Just as the entrance was, the path was untended and never ending. Finally I reached a clearing with lined up monuments with animals chiseled into the front of each. The clearing was a circle shape. On closer invetigation, the animals were dogs, except for the largest one, which was a wolf. (like from zombie loan!)

I heard about places like this. These were shrines for the deities that were messengers. What struck me odd was that wolves were the messengers, not dogs, yet only one was a wolf. Maniacal laughing caused me to spin in a full circle. On top of the wolf shrine, Takeda sat. _The people who built this shrine believed dogs worked under the wolves. This place still holds powers, but was long abandoned. _I knelt down to pray. Being half dog demon, I felt at home, in place.

I prayed. I prayed for Rei to find his memories and Orochimaru to be forgiven for his sins when he died and for me to remember. I felt woozy. The whole world was spinning in a circle. I, for a brief second, saw a silver wolf staring down at me with red, piercing eyes, then I fainted.

I woke up with a splitting migraine and noticing a crack on the face of the wolf shrine and the full moon shining in the dead night. I tried to stand, but fell on my side. My entire left leg was numb. It felt weird to not feel it but I could still walk once I got used to the sensation. I stumbled half way through the thicket before I bumped into Kimimaro. "Orochimaru sent everyone to look for you. He's mad that we weren't moved out by now. Where were you?"

"I was visiting a shrine before we left." He was looking at me strangely. "What?"

"What happened to your eye?" I gave him a questioning look and he explained. "It's clawed closed." I touched my eye and sure enough, I felt three scars covering my eye. It didn't hurt at all, but I could tell it was fresh because it was still bleeding. I took bandages out of my backpack and wrapped my eye messily.

"Ikimashoo. I don't want to be killed on sight and cause a massacre." I was happy truth be told. With every passing moment, I was gaining my missing memories back.

**Sorry the beginnings confusing but I was half asleep and didn't feel like redoing it. Review. Oh and on another note someone commented on how he hated the story but why, tell me why did he read until chapter 22 to complain?**


	18. Ability to Remember

Down on my hands and knees, coughing up blood, a scoffing voice rained killing intent on me. I coughed up blood and before I could wipe it from my chin, a kick to my ribs sent me sprawling into a tree. I stood, but my curse mark burned so bad I needed the support of the tree to keep me up. "Koto-san, you wouldn't happen to be mad at me?" Scowling, Orochimaru dropped the genjutsu (we were half way to our new base.), returning to his original form. I shouldn't of had such a smug expression on my face, but how could I help it? My memories were coming back. It was a painful process though.

My migraine grew worse as the world spun and forced what seemed a lifetime worth of memories into todays time. It was like cramming 100 people through a door. Pain from Orochimaru's vicious attacks mingled with my existing pain, so I could bear it quite well. A hand squeezed my face and bashed my head against the tree about 7 times. I bit his thumb so hard, he would need stitches to stop the bleed. Blood seeped into my mouth, making me crave it. The cannibal in me was coming out because of my fresh memory of the taste. _I must be going mad! I want to taste more! _

Aggravating my sense of right and wrong, I fought back. The chains around my wrists were summoned. Scythes, at the end of the chains, swung towards Orochimaru. He dodged it gracefully. "My, decided to play with me I see. This should be fun." I yanked on the chain and brought the scythe back in my hand. I charged forward rapidly, my claws out-stretched and my teeth baring. "Kaji right?"

I laughed like a hyena. "You wish." This was like Kaji, but it was me. I had no sense of anything; I was running on pure animal instinct. I jumped and tried to drop kick him. He only half dodged. The ground where I kicked brought a storm of earth spraying in every directions like meteors. One struck Orochimaru and shattered his knee cap. I attack using my claws like a sword. I thrust my hand forward and made a only scratch on his chest. Kimimaro stepped up and blocked most of the impact with a bone dagger. "No fair! I still wanted to play with Orochimaru. He wasn't even getting serious, now were you?"

"So you could tell. I was hoping to see you at full potential, but I suppose you wouldn't have shown me knowing I wasn't." Kimimaro and I danced. Neither of us could land a hit on each other, nor did we tire. I kept my head facing my opponent, but let my eyes drift towards Orochimaru, sitting on a rock. He was happy and fascinated, without letting a hint of boredom show. Finally, when I landed a kick on Kimimaro's chest, I jumped in front of Orochimaru.

"I wanna play with you." Straddling him and leaning against his body, claws tore through his gut like paper. As snakes poured out of the gaping wound, I screamed and jumped back. A snake still clung to my arm. I kept screaming hysterically. Memories of poisonous snakes biting, sinking their fangs in my flesh, were fresh in my mind. I kept screaming until I fainted.

Feeling normal and rational, I looked around the room I was in. I was in a hospital room, restraints on my arms and legs. I took a few deep breaths and concentrated. I remember every single thing I did. Of course I was detained! I heard a weird croaking sound and turned my head. Iro was laying on the floor making noise like a wounded animal. "Aaakaaaan."

"Iro-kun! Doushita? Iro-kun!" I thrashed wildly against my restraints. "Iro-kun! You sadistic fucker! Come out! I know your somewhere around here admiring your handiwork! What the hell did you do to Iro-kun!" Iro-kun scratched the floor, breaking off fingernails. He stared at the ceiling, eyes wide and faded. Drool spilled out of the corner of his mouth.

"You know me too well. You know this is your fault. Messing with Iro-kun is the best torture for you." Cold laughter kept ringing in my ears. Tears stung my eyes. I didn't care. I let the tears flow freely. I tried to speak, but I couldn't form words. "If you want to know what I did to him, I'll gladly say. It was an accident really. I grabbed him by the neck and kept squeezing until I crushed something. It probably hurts to swallow, but Kabuto can fix that. Unfortunately, he won't be able to fix his voice. Gomenasai. Demo, Iro-kun won't be able to talk beyond that damned squeeking."

"Not-why- It wasn't right to do that to him. If you were pissed off, you should have taken it out on me. I'm no doubt the cause, right?"

"Ahh! But it wouldn't have gotten through to you if that happened. The only way to get you to understand is to hit you where it really hurts." A silence gave me time to grieve. "I hate to bother you, but can I ask what happened on our merry little way our here?" I wasn't sure what to say. Why is it, all the questions he asks, I don't know the answers. Not won't answer. Don't _know!_

"I'm not sure... I was praying, then I fainted. I woke up with a messed up eye and went crazy. I'm don't know what else happened. I guess I was reliving a few memories." That was my only explaination and it did make sense. Takeda's voice echoed throughout the room. _Honestly, when he decides to let you go, check out your eye! I think it got upgraded! _"Oh, URUSEI! I have enough problems dealing with Orochimaru. And I don't need your sarcasm! What-"

"Who are you talking to?" Orochimaru wore an annoyed frown. I didn't realize I was talking out loud.

"Takeda-sama, he's an imaginary friend that started visiting me again." I turned my attention back to Takeda. "What if I went blind in that eye? You would be laughing your ass off!" I glared at empty space before realizing what I had done. I moved and saw an Orochimaru with a I-am-not-amused look plastered on his face.

He grabbed my hair and leaned close to my face. "Love you, sweety. I'll send Kabuto in to fix that worthless trash. I'll also be nice enough to show a friendly face to keep you company." I didn't think he noticed the flash of fear on my face, but he must have. "Kimimaro, not me. I don't want to permanently traumatize you! I will, however, visit everyday. And everyone is instructed to leave you be, so you get anywhere beyond talking with anyone."

If I was screwed, why not take a risk? Maybe I'd be put on probation for good behavior. "What if I wanted you to stay and keep me company? Tomaru. At the very least." Iro's eyes widened in horror as he tried to scream in protest. _Auuhhkkaah._ "Just promise not to hurt

Iro-kun anymore. I'm sorry that I didn't know my place before, but I do now."

He stood still, as if he was considering. Without turning, he brought his hand to my face and traced his fingers from my cheek to my neck. His hand lingered a moment before scratching my curse mark. As the red welts appeared, pain seared up and down my body. I bit my lip to prevent myself from crying. "Groveling isn't your most appealing quality. It's pathetic to watch you reduced to such a state. I must of already broken you. Pity, I thought you were stronger."

Broken? What did he want me to do with Iro within killing distance? Besides, maybe I really did want his company. I would enjoy Kimimaro's company just as well, but... "How was that groveling? Do you assume that I'm just kissing up to you so I can protect Iro-kun and I? I haven't gotten that desperate, I can assure you. Don't worry about it though. I'd appreciate Kimimaro's company just as well."

He left without bothering to reply. 7 minutes later, the lonely room was blessed with 2 new guests. Kabuto moved quickly, running over to the patient and placing his hand on Iro's neck. He tried to crawl away but was too weak. He stopped his useless struggles when he suddenly figured out he was being healed.

Kimimaro walked calmly over to me, throwing a simple 5-second glance Iro's way. The screeching of the metal stool, that he dragged to my table, against the floor, were nails screaming on a chalkboard. We sat in an akward silence for 10 minutes before I broke it. "I'm sorry for fighting with you. The other day I wasn't myself. Gomen." He stared at me blankly giving no indication of continuing the conversation. "Nani? I'm apologizing. I know I can't take yesterday back, but this is the-"

"Yesterday, during the fight, you said I was a freak who should still be locked up." His eyes were dead serious and filled with hurt. _What!? I don't remember that! Am I still missing pieces of what happened yesterday?_ Why not? I had plenty of things occuring and was acting like I was on drugs. I returned my thoughts to Kimimaro. What could I say that could make him feel better? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. It was already said and done. There's no way to take it back.

"Kimimaro... I'm sorry. I didn't mean it! I was off. I can't even remember saying it. You're one of my best friends here! You know I would never say something so hurtful to you! Onegai! Shinjiru!" I knew even if he did, he would still act differently around me.

"I do believe you. It still bothers me though. Gomenasai."

Sudden realization struck me hard. " Where's Rei? He's alive right? Right? Kami-sama! Where is he?" As Kimimaro gave me another blank stare, another thought hit me; he doesn't know who Rei is. There's a good chance Orochimaru didn't even bring him. "Umm... did a man with red eyes come with us? He has-"

"I know who you're talking about. He's being processed by Orochimaru-sama to find his place in Otogakure. He could either be a shinobi, container, medic, experiment subject, scientist to help with experiments, or opponent in a practice session. Only positions that have a good chance of long-term survival are medic or scientist."

"Kiki-san" Kabuto interrupted our conversation, with a tone in his voice that showed how serious he was, "Iro-kun needs immediate surgery or else he'll die."

**Well this chapter looks longer... Shinjiru- believe me . Doushit****a****-whats wrong. Notice the E is an A now so the meaning changes. Learning's fun! Review. This isn't my favorite chapter but I think it's still pretty good.**


	19. Iro

I stared at Kabuto in disbelief. After being informed that Iro needed immediate surgery, the only followed actions were him being prepped. I stared down at a incapacitated Iro, crying. I had broken through my restraints when I heard Kabuto say he couldn't operate without Orochimaru's permission. It took all my self-control to not kill both men.

_"Why can't you do the surgery? You said so yourself! He needs it immediately!"_

_"Hai. Demo Iro-kun's problem is he needs a heart transplant. I have to ask Orochimaru-sama if I can use one of ours, go find a new one, or leave him be. There is a very good chance that he did this to Iro-kun on purpose."_

_"So go get him and ask all fucking ready! If you don't I do the fucking thing myself!"_

_"Orochimaru-sama specificly asked not to be disturbed by anyone for any reason what so ever. As for your other statement, go ahead and try. I hope you find sterile supplies, a compatible heart, fresh blood, and enough chakra left over to heal what needs to be."_

I burst out of the room to search for that twisted teme. My wrists and ankles bled from the earlier struggles against my shackles, but my palms were bleeding from my clenched fist. I was seeing red and refusing to hide my killing intent. I was pissed and going to let him fucking know. "OROCHIMARU-FUCKER!" I screamed at the top of my lungs,"COME THE FUCK OUT AND PLAY! I JUST NEED TO TALK TO YOU REAL QUICK!"

This being a new base, I didn't know my way around. It didn't help that I hadn't time to explore because the second I came here, I was unconscious and hospitalized. The scent of blood was everywhere and everything, making it impossible to derive anything from anything. The sight of depressing hallways, with not even enough light to read by, reached for miles in every direction. Sounds of faint pulses and agonized screeches pushed through the walls. The feel of the damp air surrounding me drove shivers up my spine.

But the taste, the taste was a different story. As odd or impossible as it may seem, I could taste him in the air. I craved that taste since I had already had a sample bite. He had such a wonderful taste, like nothing I ever tasted. I followed it to a room that reeked of blood. I hesitated a second, but thought of my reason for my decision.

How many years have Iro and I been together? The funny thing about years is they fly by so quickly after dragging out for so long. I've lost track of time so I stopped bothering with it. I barely remember my own age. Time goes hand in hand with memories, yet I desire one and not the other. Ironic.

How did I meet him? I met him at the edge of the forest near my old village. (I wonder if any proof of the village stands. We weren't very well-known, but we could get by with the few missions given to us.) He was so young, too young to be left alone, crouched under the tree. His clothes were torn and ragged from traveling around. It visibly showed how long the boy had gone without food. Scrapes and bruises covered his limbs, but his torso only brandished older, permanent scars. And maybe this was only my opinion, but the worse thing about him was his glassy eyes. They looked as if they feared everything, like there was no life in them.

I didn't ever want to see those eyes again, but they came back. Ever since he came here, that's all I've seen. He tried to hide it behind his hollow smile, but it was so obvious. I don't know why I smiled back to him all those times. Both of us knew how fake each other were and how it didn't help anyone, yet we stayed in denial. I wonder if we hurt anything by lying so.

_Age 5: Iro was chasing a dog, who was chasing a cat, who was chasing a mouse. After 8 minutes, Iro finally fell on the dog, who fell on the cat, who fell on a rock next to the mouse who got away. Rolling over Iro declared," Never walk again...never." I put a plate of chocolate cake 3 feet away and after 2 sniffs, he jumped up and shoved it in his mouth._

_Age 7: Iro is bouncing a ball by himself. Annoyed he throws it so hard, it bounces on the rooftop. 20 minutes later he convinces all the village kids to help get it down. After making a pyramid, it falls and someone lands on Iro. The kid stands blushing and spurting out apologies. Iro blinked. "I don't swing that way. Sorry mister." The kid starts to beat up Iro within an inch of his life. "I'm a girl, jackass!"_

_Age 10: Iro brought a stray cat home. He hid it in the attic. I heard it and thought we had mice. I told Iro and he suggested we get a cat. After one night with the cat I told him the cat was just as bad as te mice. I succumbed to his pleading to keep the cat in his room. Iro caught rodents and put them at my door so it looked like the cat caught and dumped them there._

Now wasn't a time to stop and reminisce about Iro! Doing that is acting like he's dead! He won't die. He won't die. Tears tumbled down my face, blurring my vision. He's one of the few good things in my life! How could God take him away? My chest started hurting at the thoughts of him being forever gone. I absently clasped it, hoping to dull the pain, with no prevail.

That's how Orochimaru found me when he opened the door, crying and clutching my chest. "Iro-kun needs surgery. Kabuto-san won't do anything without asking you for permission. Just give me the okay and I promise I'll be on my way and not bother you ever again."

"What if I say no?" He wore a sadistic smirk. In that moment, in that smirk, accompanied by the look in his eyes, I understood, he did that to Iro on purpose.

"You bastard." My voice was a whispered until anger took a hold. "YOU FUCKIN' BASTARD!!!" I swung my fists blindly, only to be struck down to the floor. I tried to move but his foot came down hard on my ribcage.

"I have some quick questions. One: Who untied you? Two: I'm sure Kabuto mentioned I didn't want to be bothered, so why are you here? Three: Why are you crying? And by the way the quicker you answer the better."

I was planning to answer without causing any problems. Taking deep breaths, I started. "I broke the restraints by myself. Iro needs surgery immediately, and I need your permission. The third answer is the same as the second. Please Orochimaru-sama..."

"Surgery? The poor boy! He's just an innocent child! What on earth happened?" The mock innocence and concern was pissing me off, but I controlled myself for Iro's sake.

"I don't know exactly. Why don't you fill in the blanks when I'm finished? Something's wrong with his heart. Kabuto-san didn't go into detail, but Iro-kun might die soon if you don't help!"

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're accusing me of something. I don't think you should blame me for God's mistake."

"And how the hell is this God's mistake? Did he speak to you and tell you to totally decimate our village? Did he tell you to ruin our lives?" He started his dark chuckle.

"Making you the way you are: defiant, feisty, and emotional. And making me the way I am: sadistic, dark, and cruel."

"Please stop it! Just help me!"

"Me? How could I help? I'm no doctor." He was fucking with me. I explained the situation how many times? And all I get is this man, if you can call him that, leading me in circles.

"Please! I'll do anything, Orochimaru-sama! I don't care! I'll pledge entire loyalty to you. I'll listen to all your orders, anything! But please Kabuto won't do anything unless you say it's alright." I sounded pathetic and desperate, but I didn't care! Iro was my last real family. I wouldn't let him go without a fight.

"Come here." Beckoning me with his finger, he removed his foot. I sat up quickly and leaned my ear close to his face as he whispered 10 special conditions to me. "Do you agree? There is no exceptions or negotiating, understood?"

"Hai, Orochimaru-sama. I understand and agree, no questions asked." Grinning triumphantly, he handed me a folded note and after that everything felt like it was going in slow motion. I ran. I ran straight to Iro, but the faster I went, the more it felt like everything was standing still. Seeing the flickering lights ahead dancing on the wall, renewed hope and excitement filled me. I ran faster and faster and faster until I made it. I collapsed on the floor in the doorway just in time to see Kabuto lay a white sheet over Iro's face.

**I'm sorry people. This is my last speedy update. Now it'll be every saturday, once a week. Review. and don't complain about my updating! Fair sized chappie I think.**


	20. Conditional Coping

I lay in bed naked, for I just came out of the shower. I let my mind wander to Iro. After his pulse stopped, I had to slap Kabuto across the face for trying to use his bodies for experiments. Iro wasn't given a proper burial. In fact I burnt his body myself and swept the ashes into a vase I made. I then left the village, without permission, and buried the urn in my original village. I sat and stared at the cairn I built ontop his grave, my mind was blank. Rules of a demon: 1. Bury your own 2. Keep what you kill. 3. Follow through with your deals. They're just rules everyone knows that no one says.

I had buried my own. The keep what you kill part didn't apply to me; it applied to... that man. Though he would probably take my actions as those of spit, rather than respect, I stuck to the law. I took a ring off Iro's finger, placed it on a chain and left it with a note: _Keep what you kill._ The third law is a doozy. It means if you make deals with demons, you couldn't weasel your way out. I thought about making a deal to resurrect him, but I didn't. A long time ago I remember telling someone when a loved one died you can't rewind the past or else you can't move to the future. I still missed him but at least I had Rei.

He works in the kitchen because apparently he cooks to that man's liking. I think it's only so he could get closer to Rei. I don't want him to die so I keep an eye on him and forced Rei to have someone else take that man's food down to him. Rei stays in my room and I can't help but think it would be so easy to run so very far away, but I can't.

_Condition 10: Not matter if Iro dies or someone else dies that you know, you are to stay in Otogakure with me._

I visited Kurogane immediately after Iro died. It wasn't much. Just sitting in his company, no talking, no eating. It was calming, how Kurogane held me against his chest. Why I felt so at ease with him, I don't know, but it was nice to lose yourself every once in a while. Kurogane never asked what was wrong. He looked in my eyes when I came to visit and saw the mourning in them.

When Iro died, I saw that man, when I had the urn in my hands, he smiled at me. "Oops. Looks like we were too late. Gomen." Tears ran down my face. I turned my head and stared directly in his eyes. With the even voice I said, "I hate you.". Those eyes widened and the smirk dissappeared. I walked calmly passed him and refused to look back.

I wonder what would happen if I tried to kill myself? I knew I could. I knew I should. I could here his footsteps coming closer. I had cut myself when I was young, but I wasn't a sadist. Funny, cutting was an alternative to drinking for me. I always stared at my scars and wondered why I put them there. I stared at the scars when I felt bad, at least until it faded.

That man stopped outside my door and after hesitating he opened the door without knocking. He had a frown on his face, but still let his eyes wander on Kiki's nude form. "Come on. It's time to go." He leaned on the wall and waited for me get ready. "You have 3 minutes."

_Condition 1: At 6:00 a.m. every morning we go to the training grounds and spar._

He stayed still until he finally broke the silence. "Whats this?" Out of the palm of his hand slipped a necklace holding a ring. "It wasn't my fault he died. The boy was a sniveling coward, who kept trying to run away. From me _and_ the village. I did the best to stop him, but it would seem I went overboard."

I, too, stayed put. I refused to acknowledge him or be at all intimidated. A second went by and then my face was smashed against the wall. "Times up." I didn't move and I didn't cry and I made sure not to look at him. If I did, I would definently cry. He kept bashing my head in the wall. I wasn't thinking when I grabbed a kunai from his pouch and attempted to slash open my throat.

_It was white. Everything was white. Nothing was white. This was everywhere and nowhere. Where was I? I was there! No, I wasn't there... This wasn't it. There's no way someplace as empty and lonely had a chance to be holy. I was in limbo. The world between. Not quite heaven, not quite hell. But this meant I wasn't alive, but I wasn't dead, yet. _

_I took a deep breath, but I couldn't. My lungs felt fine though. It took me a while to realize I should try here. I let my eye's flutter shut, and almost immediately felt another presence. I shot open my eyes and moved my head up to see the face of Iro. "Okaasan shouldn't be here." I tried to speak, but tears ran down my face and no sound was let out. "Okaasan should be living and helping people until it's time to go. It's not time." I don't want to go back! I thought, vigorously repeating the sentence, hoping it could reach him. I think it did, but he kept that meloncholy face._

_"You can't stay. I'm I dead? No. I'll be kept alive in a different in a perspective, and I'll protect you and be by your side even if you can't see me." He gave me a quick kiss on the forehead and waved goodbye._

My neck felt warm. I felt a hand resting gently on it, but I knew I didn't need to be afraid of it trying to kill me. I didn't feel the pain anymore because it took it away. _This must be heaven. _I took the hand in my own and entwined our fingers together. With the back of the hand, I rubbed it on my cheek. "You're in a different mood now." I tried to respond but I was cut short by running feet and the subordinate that burst into a room.

"There's a problem! The priosners... th-there... gone..." The man was out of breath. It was obvious that fear of Orochimaru was the only thing that kept him standing.

"What!? How? Explain now or I swear-"

"Kurogane...had... something...dish. Broke out. Let others... ran. So many... heading out border..."

It took 5 seconds to kill the man And 5 minutes to drag me by my arm and force me to help round up the escaped prisoners.

_Condition 3: You will follow all my orders._

I found 3 and whats worse I handed them over. They screamed and begged me to let them. They told me all that would happen to them if they went back. I listened to so many horrible, gruesome stories. It sounded more merciful to puncture a lung and leave it unattended. One man managed to kill himself just as I dragged the trio to Orochimaru's feet. He was dying slowly, but he didn't care. I gingerly picked him up and snapped his neck and whispered to him," You don't have to suffer anymore..."

Orochimaru stared at me like I had done the stupidest thing in the world. He silently wrapped wire around them. He pulled it tight and walked back towards the base. The wire cut into their flesh, going deeper with every step. "Yamete!" I shouldn't have yelled but I couldn't do nothing!

He stared at me annoyed. "It's not your business. There are 8 other prisoners to track down. You better get to it, because if one gets away... You might have another tragedy on your hands." Like that he left and I gritted my teeth and run to find the others.

The wheel of fate was set into motion when I happened to find the next prisoner: Kurogane. I wasn't sure what to do. He saw me approaching and smiled. He grabbed me and gave me a big hug. "Come on! Iko! Hayaku. Demo shizuka ni shite."

"Hai." That's all I said. What could I do? I was so scared. We ran to the very border I should have stopped him at. Before crossing it, I sensed Orochimaru's chakra signature. I stopped, making him follow. "Doushita? Yo? Kiki-san?" Paying sudden attention, I looked at him. "Iko. You honestly don't want to stay with him do you?" _My dream... I guess I do need to chose._

"Run, fast I'll hold him off. Don't question me, just run." He stood paralyzed for a moment, then he kissed my cheek and ran.

He turned his head back and yelled, "Hope to see you soon! Maybe your breasts will get bigger! I swear they do every time I see them! Though they might not be as squeezable as they should... JAA NE!" He started runnig like hell.

"...HENTAI!" I swear to Kami-sama when I see him again, I'm gonna... I-

_By the pricking of my thumbs_

_Something wicked this way comes_

I saw Orochimaru biting his thumbs. As blood dripped down, I saw the look in his eyes. The voice in my head was screaming, _SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES!!!_

**You people are great! thanks for reading. See? I had a purpose for that chapter with Kurogane way back when. Everything gots some purpose. And review. They don't have to be from someone who saved it. It doesn't need to be nice. If you don't like it specify where. And this chapter isn't the best. Something seems off. Maybe I'll redo it someday. **

**Iko- Let's go**

**Hayaku- Hurry**

**Demo shizuka ni shite- But be quiet.**

**Doushita- What's wrong.**

**One more thing. In earlier chapters I used Kimi instead of Boku which is You instead of I, sorry if anyone cares. and condition are out of order and will all appear gradually.**


	21. Stability

A tidal wave of snakes slithered towards me. Tiny jaws flickered open, revealing the tip of something metal. Whether fortunate or un- that was all I could see because I fainted. My escape into the dream world backfired as it turned to nightmares that mangenkyo sharingan could have been proud to host. I didn't realize it at first that something was off but the problem presented itself almost immediately. But my screams couldn't be heard, or made as a matter of a fact, here.

My endless dream- no nightmare- was filled with demonic snakes smothering me and that damned voice, taunting me with that echo, "_Something wicked this way comes, something wicked this way comes, something wicked this way comes." _That voice alone was the only sound that could be heard. And those charging snakes are the only things able to move. It seemed as though my only sense that would obey me was my sight.

When the snakes finally reached me, they bound me, squeezing me, crushing my bones. During this torture a startling, and disturbing, thought popped into my head; what if this was what was happening in the real world while I was unconscious? I couldn't delve further into my hypothesis due to the lack of oxygen. My lung were on fire, but what was worst was the snake constricting tightly around my neck. Desperate for air, I opened my mouth, trying to suck up _anything! _My prayers were answered but only differently then I had hoped. Instead of air, my mouth was filled with the largest snake in the room.

Weird cries that sounded animalistic made my throat vibrate. It took me long to figure out it wasn't the snake but me. The snake kept sliding down into my throat, but it couldn't fit. My jaw started to tear as it forced it apart. As my neck bulged, I began to choke and see black spots gather in front of my eyes. _Dasukete... It hurts..._ Everything began fading, but the tears that burned my eyes splattered on the ground, making a dripping noise.

The first thing that I heard when I regained consciousness was the IV drip. I turned my head to the sound, but then the familiar scent of medication filled my nostrils. I groaned, not bothering to concealing my emotions. The fact that I was so frequently visiting the hospital made me feel weak and inferior. I tried sitting up, but it was useless. At the sound of the opening door, I closed my eyes and feined sleep. I heard rustling and things being moved, but when he came over to me, he stopped for a second and walked back out the door. I felt light headed and all logic ran away.

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I passed Kabuto in the hall as I walked to Kiki's room. "How's her condition?" When I last saw her, her face was contorted in fear. She was so beautiful that way... I think she fainted when I summoned the snakes. Not before laughing like a maniac and yelling, "_Something wicked this way comes. Open locks, whoever knocks!"_ She had something in her hand, but I never got a clear look. It was paper or...

"Orochimaru-sama? Did you hear me? Are you even listening?" I snapped my head up to meet with Kabuto's confused gaze. After staring with an equally confused look in my eyes, he sighed and re-explained. "She's fine. She had some fractures all over her body. Your snakes did quite a number on her. I just gave her some medication, so she might be out of it."

"I'm sorry Kabuto-kun I think you may have made a mistake. You said my snakes hurt her? That's impossible because they never attacked her. She almost immediately went unconscious when the fight began."

"Did you do something to her while she was unconscious, then?" I narrowed my eyes at the implication. Realizing his mistake, Kabuto quickly added," Not that I mean to imply anything! I just want to get to the bottom of this! It's just, if she was hurt like this before the fight she wouldn't have been able to stay standing. And it's not possible for her to have been so badly injured when she collapsed."

Though I was still angry at Kabuto, I see his standpoint. How did she get so injured? I looked towrds her room and decided to get the answers myself. "Kabuto, don't disturb Kiki-chan's room until I tell you so." He muttered a quick , Hai, Orochimaru-sama and ran about his business. I heard something from the room that sounded like a child's laughing. I went in and saw Kiki alone, but with a odd look about her. She smiled at me and patted the seat next to her. I checked the room thoroughly and found it completely empty. Wearily I closed the door and walked over to her. The air became chilled and shivers trailed up my back. I made a mental note to inform Kabuto. Focusing my Attention back on Kiki, she cocked her head and took the hospital sheets off the bed. As she handed them to me I registered two things: 1. She was naked. 2. Her body was riddled with scars I never noticed.

"Was someone else in here? I thought I heard something." She went into giggling fits and cooed in my ear," I'm soo cold Orochi-kun," she stopped to lick my ear," Can get under the covers with you?" I stared at her for a moment stunned. _This isn't anything like her- The medication! She's probably high on the drugs Kabuto gave her!_

"Kiki, recite the poem about the two men who died fighting." She gave me an odd look like I was the one on drugs. She pounded her fist into the palm. "Oh." She took a deep breath and began:

_One bright morning, in the middle of the night_

_Two dead boys got up to fight_

_Back to back they faced each other_

_Drew their swords and shot each other_

_A deaf policeman heard the noise _

_And came and killed the two dead boys_

"Yaaay!!!" She began clapping her hands together like a child. "Owie." She held her bandaged eye. My eye began to twitch in annoyance. I felt like killing her, but I refrain knowing it wasn't completely her fault. Kabuto on the other hand...

I looked up at Kiki and she was holding her hand to her eye. I reached out to see the problem but she winced away. "Hold still!" I hissed, making her stop squirming. I unwrapped the bandage and look at her eye intriugued. It was a hazed over amthyst color ,normal yes, but it was just a slit. "What happened to your eye?"

She giggled loudly and I lost my patience. I lifted her out of the bed and bashed her against the wall. "Answr me when I speak to you! Wakarimashita?" She nodded meekly as tears rolled down her face. "Good. Question 1: How did you get so injured?"

"The snakes."

"Wrong answer." I took a senban and shoved it into her arm. She screamed as it pierced through her into the wall. I almost lost control of myself. Almost. I did however, force my mouth on hers to silence her before I went crazy.

"Shinjiru. Snakeys from my dream hurt me. Onegai don't do it again Okaachan. Gomenasai... Gomen." She started whispering and sniffeling incoherit words about her mother. To grab her attention again I slapped her. "Pay attention! Question 2: What happened to your eye?"

"Woof- woof gave me an upgrade."

"Bad response." I growled and shoved a different senban into her other arm. Ignoring the screaming (as hard as it was), I moved away from her, knowing in the state she was in she wouldn't try to escape. Besides both arms were pinned to the wall.

"Big doggy gave it to me. That's all I know." Her sniveling was pissing me off.

"Question 3: Who were you talking to? When I came into the room I heard someone who didn't sound like you."

"Those were my friends. You scared them away though." Following her gaze, I look at the open door and listened to the echoing footsteps and laughing of children.

**The conditions aren't in this chapter sorry. Maybe next time. And I really like this chapter. Tell me what you think or else I'll spoil the movie one missed call for you! and that newish national treasure. and hurt your head with math.**


	22. Ghosts Never Die

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I walked down the hall, away from Kiki, knowing in her state she wouldn't be able to help much. I reviewed my thoughts on previous events and smiled. I couldn't help it. I began to laugh, causing my shoulders to shake. I must of looked like a madman. But who could help it? Things were getting interesting. I reached my room and pulled on the door; it didn't budge. I knew it wasn't locked or otherwise the doorknob wouldn't have been able twist.

Annoyance got the better of me as I tried to break down the door. First, I bashed against it with my shoulder. I'm not entirely sure what happened, but it seemed I was hit with a recoil because in the next moment I was bashed into the opposing wall. The door stayed intact, but before I could attempt another try, a female voice drew my attention away. I didn't catch what she said and I didn't catch sight of her, so I just stared at where I heard the sound originated. Empty space.

"Mister?" I jerked my head around and stared at two children. They couldn't be over twelve, ten at the most. They looked very much alike in their own way: long, black, stringy hair that covered most of their faces (save for a space that let their eye pierce through.), eyes black and fogged over, and both wore torn, white dresses, if you could call them that. The clothes were more like rags. The one that spoke wasn't pale or barefoot. She had worn-down sandals, but no socks. Her eyes held curiousity as she stayed leaning in to my face. Both hands stayed behind her back.

The other one was a different story. Her eyes were cold and emotionless. Her skin was not only pale, but a sickly blue. She was sitting down with her knees to her chest and her arms wrapped around them. Her dead-serious gaze remained focused on me, her eyes never blinking. She held something in her hand, but I wasn't exactly sure what. It looked like a sewing needle. She kept quiet as the other one spoke. "Mister, why are you mean to Oni-chan?"

I felt their quizzical eyes analyzing me as I answered. "Onee-chan? I suppose that your refering to Kiki. I was just getting information from her. If she would only cooperate, she wouldn't get punished. Now who are you?"

"Us? Bokutachi wa Oni-chan no tomadachi desu. This is Li-Li-chan. I'm Mimiko. Oni-chan doesn't want to be here."

"But she is. I don't want her to leave and sadly this is about what _I_ want. She could if she wanted to, but it's not in the expected way. Why are you here?" The game of quid-pro-quo could have lasted forever a far as I was concerned. I only put up with it because I was receiving valid answers.

The curious glow in the girl's eyes faded to a dark, twisted bloodlust. "Bokutachi Oni-san desu. Oni-chan doko? Onee-chan no kikan desu."

"Time for what?"

"Clap, clap Oni-chan. Time to clap. We came to find Oni-chan because we thought she quit playing with us, but you're stopping her. You shouldn't interfere...unless you want to play?" It was an offer, but I'm not stupid enough to agree to something I don't fully understand.

"No." A simple answer, but given in a firm tone to warn them to avoid me. I didn't like these two. Something about them was off. And I don't mean that last look in both of their eyes.

"Fine, then. _Oni-san kochira te no naru hou e. Oni-san kochira te no naru hou e_." She began chanting over and over again. Li-Li followed her example and began to clap her hands in a steady, matching rhymth. In the process they revealed what they had in their hands. Li-Li did have a needle, but it was larger then normal and sharp. Mimiko had a butcher knife. Suddenly, they stopped. Mimiko laughed. "Tell Oni-chan the game will continue, and we promise to include her new friends." A harsh wind blew by and just like that, they were gone.

I stood and walked to my door knowing it wouldn't give me anymore trouble. I went in and sat at my desk. It was crowded by scrolls, books and files. I looked through them and quickly found the one I was searching for- Kiki's. It had all the history on her I could find. Honestly, it wasn't really much, but I could probably get a lot more information from her. The easy or hard way.

**Next Morning:**

I strode into Kiki's hospital room with many ideas forming in my head. I had already told Kabuto not to give her anymore drugs, so she should be fit for questioning. I looked at her sleeping form and smiled. Mimicking what Li-Li and Mimiko did, I began to chant and clap. I didn't get far when Kiki fell off the bed and tried to scurry in the corner like a trapped animal. "Is something the matter? Don't you want to play with me?"

"Orochimaru-san?" I frowned at the titling of -san. I walked towards her and with my foot pressed her chest against the wall. I stared at her face and saw her eyes closed tightly.

"_Sama_. Address me properly or I'll make it impossible to adress anyone."

"Is it really you?" I heard the confusion and uncertainty in her voice. "If it's you, tell me what my okaasan's name is!"

"I was never told a name. Why don't you actually look at me and check normally?"

She hesitated, only for a second, but I caught it. "Sight...can be deceiving. I assume that you've met them. Or did you just hear them? Or did you get some sort of kinky fetish involving hide and seek? Either way-"

"Why did you hesitate? Remember our agreement? _(Condition 3: Answer every question I ask and truthfully.) _If you know something, by all means tell me." I pressed my foot harder against her. She coughed and wheezed a bit, but I finally was given a truthful answer.

"When they find me, I go blind because they don't trust me to not peek. It's all a game to them, but it gets dangerous. I have to find them or else something bad will happen." She finally opened her eyes to show me a hollow, blank stare.

"Care to enlighten me? I think you should elaborate, especially if it involves me or endangers any of my plans in any way."

"They aren't exactly human. They're spirits that died violently, but since they were kids they didn't want to move on, so they find people to play with. Most of the time they force people to play with them. They especially enjoy playing hide and seek with me. When they get bored of playing with _me_, they just follow me around or sometimes, rarely, they find others to play with."

She wasn't herself. She wasn't calm or collected like she always was, she was panicking. It was a delicious sight, but, unfortunately, that meant something and I couldn't afford to waste time. "What happens to the losers? Surely they don't drag them into the game and leave them in the same position as you?" Her breath hitched.

"If you don't agree to play, they usually play with you anyway. If you play and lose, penalty. I'm not entirely sure what the penalty is-" I released my foot for a second and kicked her in the stomach. Falling foward, she choked up saliva and gagged. I took my foot, put it to her head, and pressed it down, making her breath in her own drool.

"What did I tell you about lying to me? I can tell when you do, so why bother?" I listened to hurried footsteps outside the room, but paid no attention. I saw no need mainly because something is always happening.

"They-" Kiki's explaination was cut short by ninja charging through the door. They were my own, and I was somewhat surprised to see they wore the same expression as Kiki. "Orochimaru-sama! They has been an emergency. One of your shinobi was attacked and killed but we haven't found the perpetrator. We're certain that whoever it is, is still inside the base somewhere."

"Take me to the body. Round up some shinobi and have them search every inch."

"Hai. We never moved the body from the scene. It's in the north wing by Lab 4. The shinobi have already been deployed."

As the shinobi turned to leave, I grabbed Kiki's arm and pulled her from the floor. "You're coming too. I think it's only fair, seeing how you're the only one who might understand what's going on." We walked until we found are destination.

The body was overed with random, and deep, cut marks. The right leg was dislocated with a cut in the achilles tendon, the left broken. His left arm was skinned, his right one three feet away. The finishing blow was the slit across his throat, ear to ear.(It was obvious it was done as the very last thing because of all the blood.) His eyes were gouged out and his mouth sewn shut. Above the body, in the victim's blood, _Oni-san kochira te no naru hou e_ was written.

**Explanation time! **

**Bokutachi wa Onee-chan no tomadachi desu We are demon's friends.**

**Oni-chan doko Where is demon? **

**Onee-chan no kikan desu It's big sister's turn.**

**Oni-san kochira te no naru hou e Demon, come here to where my hands clap.**

**In japan's version of hide and seek the seeker is an Oni. The Oni cover her eyes and looks for the hiders by listening to them clap. Sorta like marco polo. **

**Review! It mkaes me happy. If you don't I will make my next chapter my last and kill off Orochimaru and put in a magical lollipop land.**


	23. The Dark

Unless you were born blind you can't possibly understand what it's like, but at least I can do my best to explain it. No matter how many times I went blind, I still am not used to it. The first few minutes of terror, of panic, racking through your brain. The horrible insecurities and the feeling of being so pathetic. The last thing I need to do is second guess myself while with Orochimaru. An chuu mo saku. (1) Have you ever closed your eyes and walked around for a little bit? The brewing fear makes you open them practically immediately. What's worse is in my condition, I survive by memorizing the layout of a place by touch, sight, sound, and smell. Every few weeks we move, so I can't do that. Not to mention, the overwhelming scent of blood and sounds of screaming prisoners kills any possible chance of getting a quick memory. I don't want to rely on Orochimaru, but if things get any worse, I might have to...

Already, I was forced to ask for his help. At the crime scene, I was afraid of tripping over the body or getting lost and attacked by the more unpleasant ninja here. Now usually I don't mind a little humility, it is a virtue after all, but with him, the invalidness that creeps over you is more painful than being stabbed. Maybe it's just me who doesn't want to be deemed weak in his eyes. If it was anyone else, I'd just shrug it off. I wouldn't give a damn! But it's not anyone else! It's him! It's the man that I fell in love with and because of that I already know I am weak.

In a small whisper I tried to overcome my embarrassment,"Orochimaru-sama?"

"Hmm?"

"I need..." I could feel that bastard's smirk crossing his face, "I need a little..."

Refraining from laughing, it didn't stop the utter amusement dripping from every word. "You need what? Don't tell me you need help? That can't be it, can it?" I nodded meekly but that wasn't enough for him. He wanted me to say it. "What? Kikoemasen.(2)" Hearing the mocking tone of concern made sudden anger overtake me. Anger at him. Anger at me! Mostly me. I might be weak, but do I really want to fuel his happiness, his sadistic side that caused me so much grief? Flashes of Iro-kun flooded my mind. I forced the threatening tears, that stung my eyes, back. I couldn't, _no I wouldn't,_ show this weakness!

In a more defiant tone, I began again with mock respect to match his own. "Orochimaru-sama, could you please help me back to my room? Since I'm blind, I may have some trouble."

There was a thick silence before I was roughly grabbed and dragged back to my room. Maybe, I felt wreckless or maybe I still was high on drugs. Either way, when we got to my room, I felt for his face and draggd him down for a kiss. When at last his lips were on mine, I forced my tounge in his mouth and explored. I broke the kiss panting. A voice that wasn't Orochimaru's interrupted my gasps. "Hey sweetie I'm happy to help anytime, but thanks."

I wasn't stunned. Rather I broke out into a wild grin and answered, "Your welcome! Come visit me anytime 'cause you're one hell of a kisser!"

**Kimimaro's POV:**

She helped me when I was in trouble. It's only fair that I help her, ne? Of course I have to ask Orochimaru for permission to put missions on hold so I'd have more free time with her, but I'm sure he'd agree. I walked, slowly pacing myself, to Kiki's hospital room. I had nothing assigned to me right now so I could help Kiki as much as I wanted. While I stood in the doorway, I saw Kiki trying to kill Kabuto with his own scalpel.

Dried blood clung to it, but not Kabuto's. I heard a quiet mutter, "I need to clean it before it stains." Her teeth were clenched and her lip bleeding from biting it. Kabuto just played with her by coming near enough to be struck and jumpimg away at the last second. Finally when he got tired, he activated his chakra scalpel. I intervened at that point.

"Kabuto-senpai, don't you think you should ease up on her? She is probably under a lot of stress and playing with her could only frustrate her further."

"It's her own fault. I was only trying to give her medicine I was directed to give her."

"What medicine is that? I'm fine. The only thing that's wrong with me is my eyes and you can't fix that. They'll fix themselves in time."

A caught a glint in Kabuto's eye that I wished Kiki could see to better prepare herself. "Orochimaru-sama instructd me to give you these pain killers. He said he likes you better when on them." A brief blush covered her cheeks before the splash of blood. She had jumped out of bed and wildly slashed out until she hit him. "Damn it! Kimimaro-kun? Was there something you needed?"

"I plan to help Kiki around. I came to get her so we can go see Orochimaru-sama."

Kabuto nodded his head in understanding. "Fine, just let me-"

"No! I don't need that shitty medicine! I'm almost already healed anyway. See?" She pulled off her hospital gown to show a body with no recent damage. Slowly she stood up and wrapped a blanket around herself. I walked over and held out my arm for her to grab. When she locked on to it, she calmly stated," Let's stop by my room. I need to grab a new pair of clothes."

The entire time walking to her room, she was latched on to me like a lost child holding on to her last lifeline. Though I knew it might make her feel worst, yet I couldn't help but speak. "It's okay. I'm here to help you through this. Rei-san probably will, too." I almost regretted mentioning Rei. Orochimaru didn't like him. He was running him rigid, giving him dead-end missions, work, and do the work over and over. Kiki hadn't seen Rei since they had returned from the shrine and she might not ever.

Kiki disregarded my remark and kept by my side in silence. After a few more twists and turns, we landed in front of her door. Once inside, she asked me to help her dress. I searched around and finally found a black kimono. I slid behind her, draped it over her shoulders, and put my arms around her to tie a knot. She pushed my hands away almost immediately. "Don't worry I can tie it on my own."

"Hai, gomen."

"Don't be. You we just trying to help."

"And I might be the only one who could help you right now. Most of the other shinobi are on duty looking for the killer of that one guard." She stopped dead in her tracks. Her kimono was properly on but about one size too big. It was wrapped tightly around her, showing the sudden trembles her body made. I decided against my better judgement to keep talking. "The security has become tighter because we are unsure how the intruder entered or if it's one of our own. Considering the brutality of the attack, I wouldn't be surprised if someone already inside did it. Orochimaru-sama doesn't realize the unloyal, bottomfeeding, low lifes that serve under him are there. I-"

Suddenly she fell to her knees, breaking out into uncontrollable sobs. "It's my fault! I brought them here! I should have known better! But I felt so guilty, the pain, the wishing, the hoping that I could make it up to her. I was so naive! Not realizing what I was getting my self into! Eagerness to right my wrongs. It wasn't compassion! It was god damned selfishness!"

"What do you mean? You're surely not saying you let the murder in? If this is true," Out of my shoulder, I pulled out a bone sword and uneasily pointed it at Kiki," I have a duty to fullfil by bringing you to Orochimaru-sama for interragation and punishment." Her crossed arms squeezed her shoulders as if trying to stop the shudders.

"No. In a sense, I did and didn't. They follow me around, but they're not alive. They're dead and it's my fault! I might ot have directly murdered them, but either way it's my fault!"

"I'm not sure I understand you completely. How can they be dead, if they alive and killing? And how did you bring them here unintentionally?"

"How? They _are_ dead. They're soul wandering around because of me. They follow me around to play with me. It's a game of hide and seek. They only kill as a pass time, when they're waiting for me to find them."

At once I understood the meaning of her rantings. But if it was true, that would make her a liabilty, wouldn't it? That would mean I'd have to kill her. I didn't want to! In an attempt to find a reason to spare her, I gave her a command. "Start from the beginning and explain."

_A twelve year old Kiki stood in front of a bleeding girl crouched on the ground, beside an old oak. The girl shrunk away from an extended hand heading her way. Long, black, stringy hair covered her face, but still it was obvious she had been crying. A dirt-smudged white dress clung to her, because of the rain that had only ended six minutes ago._

_"Don't be afraid of me. I wanna help. Why are you here in the middle of the forest?" Kiki dropped down her hands and knees. Using one hand to moving the girl's hair behind her ear, she ignored the flinch and focused the attention on the small gash on the girl's forehead that let a miraculous amount of crimson blood stream down. "Oh my god! What happened!? It looks like someone threw a rock at you." Once stated, the girl avoided eye contact. "Someone did, huh?" A weak nod was the only reply. "Well come on! Take me to your house so I can bandage you up! Can't you stand?" Kiki forced her to her feet. "Now what direction?"_

_A badly bruised arm raised and pointed west. "God, you're unnaturally pale. You should go outside more on sunny days!" About half a mile of walking went by before a tugging on Kiki's sleeve made them stop. Shyly, the girl pointed south. "Go there now?" It was a quiet noise that could barely be considered a whisper and after the girl uttered it, she turned away, her face flushed. "Hai..."_

_Her house was at the far side of town. The town was quiet and seemed deserted save for a few flickering lights in the village. It wasn't very late, probably 7:00pm. Maybe something had happened._

_**Kiki:**_

_Inside her house, I bandaged her head, taking note that she lived alone and had been living alone for quite sometime. The house didn't stand out or have anything thing special about it. It was plain and dreary, giving you the sense of sorrow. "Well, there you go. Happy to help!"_

_I turned to leave, but my arm was grabbed. "Stay, please..." She turned her head away, but I heard the loneliness in her voice. I suddenly understood that I must have been the first person in a long while to be nice to her. I agreed. "Hai. By the way, what's your name?"_

_"Li Li."_

_Everyday I went to go play with her. I noticed how she started looking healthier: smiling more, less pale, her clothes we less dirty, too. One day something happened. It started as any other day, so I couldn't tell what would happen. Some other children stood off to the side as we walked past. Honestly they were the first children I had seen besides her. It was only until that moment things went downhill. A shove to our backs sent us sprawling into the mud. A call made me turn my head. "What the fuck are you doing with the demon?"_

_"What?"_

_"That bitch!"_

_"Hey! Don't talk to my friend like that!" I stood up and shoved him back._

_The boy stumbled back and with a snarl, raised his fist as if to punch me. I brought my arms to my face to shield the oncoming blow. I almost didn't notice that it never came. I glanced up and saw Li Li, holding and squeezing the boy's wrist, effortlessly. A voice darker than her own drifted in the wind. "In 4 days you will die, bleeding at the mouth. As did your onii-chan and as did your otousan." The look of terror on the boys face crushed me._

_"Li Li! Yamete! What's wrong with you?" I shook her by her shoulders which made her jerk her head towards me, almost as though she didn't know what she did. The boys ran away. In 4 days, the boy collapsed on the floor, coughing up blood. The next day, I didn't see her anymore._

_**Li Li's POV:**_

_I screamed for her, but she never came. They grabbed me by the arms and dragged me toward the cave. So many twists and turns with me futilely kicking and clawing into people who refused to flinch. Jagged rocks cut into my flesh leaving a thin, yet unmistakable, trail of blood. Finally, we reach another passage way that looked like a smaller cave. The sunlight barely breached through the darkness, if at all it did. Lamps glistened in the people's hands. The more hysterical I became, the more the light looked like hell fire. They thew me on a chair. A fear-stricken man with gray hair and a growing mustache told them to hold me down. A woman who worked at the restraunt Kiki and me went to often, grabbed my arms and held me in place. Wire was tightly wrapped around me, preventing any fleeing attempts. _

_I screamed louder and louder for Kiki. Why didn't she come? My voice was hoarse, but I was scared and had a right! She was the only person I could trust. The only one who gave a damn! Did she know about this? Is that why she didn't come today? She promised she'd come earlier today and take me to go live with her family. Usa de(3). I should have known. There no longer was a God in this forsaken world... I gasped out in pain as the wires dug into my skin, drawing more blood._

_A young man with red hair clenched his hand around my jaw and forced it open. The older man directing everyone came near me with scissors. I tried to struggle my head away, but the red head's grip was iron. The old man grasped my tounge and cut it out. Blood poured from my mouth as a scraggled, animalistic scream escaped my throat. That pain wasn't enough. A giant sewing needle swept towards me. They proceeded to sew my mouth shut._

_In a dark haze, my thoughts and sight began to fade, most likely from blood loss. I heard hammering as wood blocked the splinters of light that gave me the little hope left in my heart. Do leave me here! I tried to scream but nothing happened, no sound came out. All that was left was to let the darkness overtake me... Iie! I refused to give up. I forced my throat to produce noise. It was raw and sore but I didn't want to die! I wanted to believe in the life Kiki promised me to have. I wanted to believe so bad. I died after 23 days of screeching like a banshee, just as Kiki broke through the wood._

_**Mimiko's POV:**_

_That bitch locked me in here. My medicine is all gone. I wonder if okaasan knew that when she trapped me here. My breath became shallow, at the time what I thought was a hallucination of a girl appeared to me. "Do you want to live?" The voice was dark and seem to come from everywhere. It was...omnious._

_"Hai..." I was barely able to say it._

_"Would you like to come play with me and have revenge on our antagonists?"_

_"Hai..." She reached into my chest and in an instant I looked down at myself, lying on the floor. She led me away and I smiled. I couldn't wait to begin to play._

_**Li Li POV:**_

_Both of us found her- Kiki. I searched hi and low playing with boring people to find her. She saw me and immediately understood I had changed. "Kiki-chan? Do you wish to be forgiven? I can."_

_"Onegai. Gomenasai!" Tears rolled down her cheeks as I saw red rimmimg her eyes. "I never meant to... I looked so hard... I was too late!" She fell to her knees and bowed begging forgiveness. I tried to smile, but a twisted smirk was all that was shown. My eyes held an emotion I didn't understand. I'm not sure how to describe it. It made me feel so happy, but I knew it was bad._

_"Then come play with us forever."_

_A moment's hesitation and then, "Hai."_

**Kimimaro's POV:**

I lowered my bone sword. I wasn't sure what to do at this point. I looked into Kiki's eye (she rebandaged it) and refused for even a second to think she was lying. "You know we have to take you to Orochimaru-sama and tell him."

"Hai." Those damning words... Ironic how saying so little, could destroy so much. "After I agreed, I found out she had killed all the villagers in her town, even ones not invovled in her death. Other people she came across, too." Recomposing herself, she stood and wiped her tear-streaked eyes. She turned to me and smiled. "Thank you for listening to me. I feel better talking about, I suppose." With light footsteps, she walked over to me and gave me a hug and a lingering kiss on my forehead. That's how we were when Orochimaru came inside the room.

I turned towards him and saw the flash of anger and possessiveness in his eyes. "Orochimaru-sama, Kiki and I have a few things to discuss with you of importance." I returned my sword back in my arm and asked Kiki to repeat what she had told me. Word for word, Kiki began to retell the story with obvious reluctance. Orochimaru kept his eyes trained on Kiki, but it didn't look like he was paying any attention. Every once in a while, he would nod his head in acknowlegdement or way his hand to signal her to continue.

When the story ended, Orochimaru cast his glance between me and Kiki. "Shouldn't you go and find them? Or at least try to control them? Are you so much of an idiot," He stood and walked in front of Kiki. Knowing she couldn't see him, he tilted her head up,"that you'd be so easily guilted in to this massacre? A pathetic sinner like you-"

"Don't speak to me like I'm completely at fault! You don't know what it was like to watch her die! To be 5 minutes too late. To perhaps be the reason she died! Some people give a damn and feel remorse when someone dies!" In a swift gesture, she slapped him hard and pushed him to the floor. "I'm no more pathetic then you."

The kusanagi slipped out of his mouth and was flung in Kiki's direction. Kiki meerly grabbed it in mid air. She stepped foward and crashed the blade down into Orochimaru's shoulder. I involved myself by restraining Kiki from behind. She didn't struggle. She went limp in my arms. "Leave Rei-san alone. He didn't do anything and you're treating him badly. I'm sorry for jepordizing anything you've done. I'll fix it as soon as possible, but please stop punishing Rei-san for my mistakes."

_Condition 7: You're opinions won't ever matter unless you're asked to give it._

He chuckled loudly. Slowly melting into the floor, Orochimaru appeared beside us. "Kimimaro-kun, drop Kiki-kun, please. It's quite rude to treat her so harshly." I let go of her and stepped away. "Kimimaro-kun, can you please us alone for an... hour or so?"

"Hai, Orochimaru-sama." Bowing out of pure respect, I left the room. Out in the hallway, I heard the faint click of the lock. I walked to Kabuto's lab, but stopped when I sensed someone behind me. I turned to see a girl in rags, her black hair draped across her entire torso as her head hung low.

She lifted her head and stared at me with hollow eyes. A smirk replaced the emotionless face. Her lips were sewn shut and without moving them, a normal voice sprung from her. "Play with me?" She stepped foward as I put my hand to my chest and felt the blood from the meessy cut.

I pulled my bone sword out again. "Fine, asobimashoo.(4)"

**Hey!!!! Enjoy. Review. I might not be able to write for a while so sorry! **

**(1) To search blindly**

**(2) I can't hear.**

**(3) A lie.**

**(4) Let's play**

**My new definition system, suggested by... black... one sec. Darkness- Aura of fire . Uhh. Any questions? Oh and because Dark. (for short) acted like such an avid fan is the only reason i did have lollipop lands. Oh and I didn't bother to spell or grammar check sorry. I got lazy.**


	24. Fear

I heard the faint click of the lock and fear coursed through me as my heart beat faster. My hands shook. I wasn't sure about what would happen, but what I did know was I was alone, weaponless, blind, and no one ,even if I wasn't alone, would protect me. I did all that I could do at that point; I waited. Three minutes passed and nothing happened. I couldn't hear anything. As far as I could tell Orochimaru never moved away from the door! I felt such relief! I- Almost in a cruel irony, two arms wrapped around my waist and hissed in my ear,"You're not scared, are you?" The knot on the front of my kimono was undone.

**Orochimaru's POV:**

That look on her face was fucking delicious. I was getting tired of waiting and the lust surging through me didn't help much. I don't think I was thinking when I cupped her breast or bit her neck. She jumped back, which was only landed her closer to me. Both of us fell down so we were laying in the bed. I sucked the blood from the wound and then was slapped hard. She pushed away and grabbed the sides of her kimono, pulling them together. "What is fucking wrong with you? I- you- why?" She had a blush on her face, but anger and confusion in her eye. Suddenly, she grabbed her changed eye and doubled-over in pain. "Stop fucking with me. You fucking-" Next she clutch her breast, where her cursemark was located. "Fuc-"

"Both your eye and cursemark are reacting to your emotions. You should try to tone it done. Besides, it's not a smart thing to show your weaknesses to an enemy, or anyone for that matter. Come here." She stayed in place, attempting to shake her head no. Sad, no choice then. I stood and walked over to her. I tried to force her to stand up, but her legs gave out completely. I dragged her to the bed and flung her on it. I took a small silver case out of my pocket and opened it to reveal a needle and two small vials. One was a seditive and the other...heh, we can get to that later. I measured the dose carefully so she wouldn't be too lucid. Instead of using a cotton swab and antiseptic, I licked her arm and injected the needle, making it as painful as possible. She squirmed in discomfort, which caused her to bleed when I pulled the needle out. It was only a matter of minutes before she calmed down.

Once she relaxed, I slid the hand up her thigh, feeling the radiating heat and a small moan that came from her. "Why do you do that? Why touch me? You do realize it's only because you can't have me. I'm not up for grabs, so just go fuck Fuiro-san." I laughed. Jealousy, was it? How cute. Her envy may have amused me, but what about what she said earlier? I grounded my teeth and clenched my fists. Something about that sentence hit something inside me. "Orochimaru-san, I only put myself in my current position to help Rei-kun."

I snapped. "Don't you ever disrespect me again!" I shoved my hand into her stomach and squeezed a few organs and breaking a few ribs. When I pulled them out, I saw (and got so turned on by) Kiki's blood drenching my fingers. I wanted her now, but something inside told me not to unless she agreed. The voice wasn't leaving so I had no choice. I watched blood drip from the corner of Kiki's mouth and absently began to lick my palm.

I didn't see her eyes drift to me or notice her moving hand that grasped my arm. I didn't pay attention to her getting up. But I noticed her sucking on my fingers and dragging her tounge across each one individually. "Well are you going to?" She avoided her eye contact by staring at the blood she was lapping up.

"I suppose so, just live up to Condition 8, wakarimashita?" _(Condition 8: You will assist me in any and all of my experiments.)_ She nodded slightly. I took out the second needle, not bothering to measure the amount this time. I didn't know how much to use, which was why I'll use her as a guinea pig. As I approached her, I stared at her already healing stomach. Her healing abilities were amazing- they maybe even rivalled Kabuto's. When I placed the needle in her arm I thought it unfair and cruel so I began to explain,"Well it's a truth serum in a way. It calms the mind and blurs it at the same time so you can't lie. That's the idea anyway. I think me and you have a little bit of a trust issue. It kills me to even consider that. And tell me if you get any sudden pain or somethings wrong, okay. I need to list the side effects." I finished with the needle and began. "Question 1: What happened to your eye?"

"I prayed to the god at the shrine. It came and answered them, or maybe just one. I'm not really sure. I prayed for my memories to return, all the one's I forgot."

"What were they?" I surprised myself. Her past, now as far as I knew, wasn't exactly relavent. Probably they wouldn't ever be.

"My sister for one, actually all my family. They died a long time ago, except for Sakura. We were separated a long time ago."

"I assume Sakura is your sister. Continue."

"I remember my friends from my old town. I remember what happened and why. It's funny how painful memories don't hurt as badly if you forgot then found them. I feel so happy now."

"What did happen?"

"They were all massacred. First Satako-chan's uncle came and abused her. She was at the brink of her sanity. Thats when Rena killed him with her cleaver. We all hid the body. Then we all started dying, being killed by someone we trusted and treated as one of the village. I watched each of my friends die."

"Is that all?"

"I already told you of the Mimiko and Li Li ordeal so, yes. For now."

"What did you mean by for now?"

"More memories will come. You know, you honestly didn't need to give me a truth serum. I would have answered willingly."

"I doubt that."

"I'm under it's effects now so you know I'm not lying. I would have 'caused I love you."

I stopped dead. "Wha-" She kissed me and pulled me on the bed. Flipping our positions, she was on top of me now. Slowly she discarded her kimono and was left with her panties. I saw the stomach fully healed as cut my shirt off with my own kunai. Her tounge roamed my chest. When she bit my nipple, my entire body shook uncontrollably. Her fingers glided through my hair. It felt nice. Her knee pressed into my erection and then-

"Orochimaru-sama, hayaku! It's Kimimaro-san!" Loud banging almost broke down the door. My precious Kimimaro... He was still oh so useful... I put my shirt back on and slipped the kimono back onto Kiki. "Iko."

**Kimimaro's POV:**

I'm unsure what to do. Kiki was right about thse children not being normal. They probably aren't alive. I've attack with utmost effort. When I attack them in front of me, they appear and attack behind me. I once managed to land a blow. No blood came from the wound. I turned my attention away for a mere second to defend against the other girl. I turned back and the injured was fully healed, even her clothes bore no mark. They were wearing me down, but they couldn't completely for a very long time.

They gave me a few insignificant scratches, one wouldn't stop bleeding, but I was otherwise unharmed. While fighting an odd thought popped into my mind: Kiki, maybe, could perform a jyorei (1). I quickly dismissed it, or tried. Kiki did mention how she was a miko when she was younger. She said when she got older she only occassionally kept up her studies. But still... Sudden realization blew all other thoughts from my immediate attention. I was once again alone, but I heard something. A song being sung? A little ways away footsteps began to echo through the hallway. Maybe they'd be here in 10 minutes.

A push to my chest flung me to the wall. No one was there. Deep cuts and scratches were suddenly beginning to be etched into the wall beside me. With my eyes, I saw no one. _An illusion? _A jagged line went down my arm before blood started pouring. Pain spiraled down my body. This was no illusion. My feet were pulled and I was dragged to the opposing wall. Rocks cut into my back, but that was fine. Finally, I was let go. Cautiously, I stood only to fall to my knees, coughing up blood. This wasn't the same as the tuberculosis though. It looked the same, but somehow it didn't feel the same. I don't know how else to describe it. I saw a shinobi come to me and yell to get Orochimaru. _No... not here. Not safe..._ Why couldn't I keep my eyes open?

**Kiki's POV:**

We began walking down the hall, but why? What was I doing before? It seemed so distant and hazy..."AHH." I moaned in pain. I tried to remember, but it hurt too much. Orochimaru stopped walking and tilted my face up with one hand.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing you need to be concerned about."

A didn't hear him that well since he was muttering, but I think he said,"It must be wearing off." His hand dropped from my face and in a clearer voice, "Tell me."

"My head hurts like a bitch and I can't remember what's happening or when I got into the hallway." Someone in the room tensed in fury. I sensed it, but not who was emitting it. My guess is...tada, Orochimaru!

"Iko."

We proceeded to walk again in an uneasy silence. I was about to break it, but I smelled such a strong scent of blood. Kimimaro's blood. And I smelled Li Li. Not thinking about consequences, I ran forward with bursting adrenaline. I stopped a few feet short of Kimimaro. I heard ragged breaths and him coughing. "Are-"

"You found me. Too late, I still need to finish playing." That meant she needed to kill Kimimaro then she be gone to look for me once I hid again. All over again, the cycle starts, never to be stopped. Why? Why can't I stop it? It's not guilt for them, is it? No. It's my own god damned fear holding me back. No more. No more. "NO MORE!" Everything slowed down again, just like with the village massacre. I ran infront of Kimimaro. I felt the needle shove through me. I felt my blood. I felt my tears. I put my arms out and pressed Li Li against me in a hug. "No more..." That was my last whisper.

_The pain, it was gone. Where was I? I blinked, my eyes being burned by sunlight. Tall trees everywhere... I could see again. I smiled big and took in my surroundings. I was in the middle of a forest next to some short brush. The ground was soft. I pushed my fingers into the earth and felt the dampness. It rain a few days ago. So familiar... A sudden flashback of memory hit me. It wasn't exactly a flashback, but it was a short scene with me talking to Keiichi-kun, from my original village. (The massacred one.) _

_"Remember history tends to repeat itself in the endless circle until you choose to stop it." Thats all I said to Keiichi before it ended. Was Keiichi planning to do something? Wait, history tends to... "Oh my God! I'm here!!! When? Why? How?" I heard Li Li's frantic screams echoing throughout the village. "Am I too late again?"_

**HI! Good update I hope. REVIEW! I'm serious! I will screw up the next chapter so bad if you don't. HA! and now you got a cliffie. If you don't understand the end, don't worry. It's gonna be explained in the next chapter!**

**Jyorei- exorcism**

**Jaa ne.**

**PS. And I teased you people. Maybe they'll never have sex. Maybe they'll never... save Kimimaro. HAHAHA.**


	25. Moving Forward

_I ran towards the screams, tears streaming from my face. Is this what happened to Li Li? It's said when you don't move on, you relive your death over and over again. It's no wonder she's the way she is! But why was I here? And a more important question: Could I change anything? It's better to try and fail than to not try at all. I ran in random directions, panicking too much to think straight. I began to hear her screams more clearly,"KIKI-CHAN! DASUKETE! KOWAII DESU! ONEGAI KIKI-CHAN!"(1) The whole time she was dying, was she relying on me to save her? That's not fair... How could I know what was happening? How was I? In this hell, Li Li resides. Now I'm here in the past. I can help her, I will help her this time._

_Thoughtlessly I charged forward. I tumbled when the forest ended and I saw a mob of people outside a cave. I heard the hoarse screaming, feeling daggers in my heart. I looked around this dreary memory, hoping an epiphany. Everything seemed so dead. There was no color. There was no sun. No warmth. Bleak and cold. I pushed into the crowd only to be forced backed and shoved on the ground. "LI LI!!! DON'T WORRY! I'M COMING!!!" I began to claw recklessly at the backs of the villagers. I didn't see how deep I cut them. A man tried subduing me, but his attack was so forward and expected, I easily countered it by ducking low. I slipped off to his side and, by the shoulders, lifted him up and tossed him into a tree. I heard a sickening crack as he became part of this world. A pic axe dug into my shoulder. I broke the handle and pulled it out. I threw it aside, deciding to use my own brute force against them. I was soaked in their blood and not giving a damn._

_I finally made it through the mob that was blocking the entrance. Now I had to find the mob that was going to torture and kill her. I desparately flung my head from side to side, looking for anything to point me in the right direction. This cave had so many passages and rooms in it, it would be almost impossible to search all of them. "LI LI! IF YOU CAN HEAR ME, SCREAM!" I heard a muffled cry and raced to the second passage on the left. Halfway through, I tripped and ripped my leg open on an old, rusted bird cage on it's side. Red blood seeped out of the wound. _

_I stared at the dead bird laying down. I touched the cage's door and the bird sprang up. Yellow eyes, sleek, black feathers, a sharp curved beak: this bird was a demon. I looked at the very bottom of the cage. A seal was badly drawn to lock the demon in. It worked, so I shouldn't worry. I looked at the aura it emitted. It was so powerful! I couldn't believe it was confined in a caged birds form. "You're why this is happening, aren't you? Your aura is attracting demons and they're possessing and killing the villagers. Your aura changed Li Li, not only by giving the power of knowing death, but by making the killing demon-spirit she is now." I heard Li Li's screaming just up ahead. I turned away and stood ignoring the pain. "I'll be back for you."_

_I lost her again. I listened carefully but again she was gone. That demon was probably hiding her from me. In frustration a slammed my fist in the wall. I lowered my head in anger and shame as tears rolled down again. I opened my eyes just to widen them. On the ground, Li Li's blood left a trail like Hansel and Gretel's bread crumbs. I ran, keeping my head low to stare at the new found path even though it hurt my neck. I saw a swinging lantern hanging right outside a smaller cave. I rushed in pushing passed so many people just in time to see a man with a knife holding Li Li's tounge. "Yamete!" I ran forward and shoved the man over. I stared at Li Li with so many tears in my eyes. She was bleeding so badly. She had so much fear in her eyes. I fell to my knees and hugged Li Li. I felt the wires with my arms. I tried to pull at it. She cried out in pain as more blood dripped down her sides. Frantically, I groped for something to cut them off. Remembering the knife the old bastard had, I ran to him. I picked up the blade and swiftly kicked the man when he stirred._

_"Don't do that! You don't understand! She an evil demon that kills us. She needs to be stopped before it's too late!" I spun in circles everyone and everything blurring together. The killing intent pouring out of them. The look in their eyes. Bits of wood, hammers, knives, and metal scraps were in their hands. They advanced towards Li Li. I couldn't fight them all off. How the hell could I protect her!? "What should I do?" I whispered to myself. Letting go of all my fear and doubt, I relaxed. "Chotto matte. (2)" They stopped and turned to me, ready to kill me if I tried to intervene again. "Chotto matte! Onegai! Hear me out!"_

_"Nothing you can say will change our minds. It's kill or be killed." I briefly clossed my eyes. When I reopened them, I had a plan all ready. Most people are cowards. If they're not prepared they won't fight._

_"All of you are idiots. Truely foolish. Lost in your own paranoia, you dare to turn on your own kind! Humans are so petty!" They all stared at me confused. Putting on an Orochimaru smirk, I tore my bandage of my eye and the hat I was wearing off my head. They all fell back and tried to escape me. I laughed. "If you want to kill someone, kill me! Try. I dare you!" They all ran away. Except for the man behind me. I didn't see him stand up or take out another knife until it was too late. I flipped around and face him only to feel something puncture my kidney. When he stabbed me, I started to feel so cold. I didn't feel anything when I hit the ground. "KIKI! KIKI! KIKI! WAKE UP! PLEASE..."_

"Kiki? Kiki?" A gentle hand on my shoulder shook me awake. I opened my eyes(I could still see!) and stared at Kimimaro. He was sitting on a stool beside my hospital bed. I tried getting up, but I was push back down."You shouldn't try to get up. You just came out of surgery. Kabuto-sempai had to give you a new kidney because that girl stabbed into it. She's gone right now. Is she coming back?" His face didn't look worried, but I know he probably was.

"I don't know." Was it all a dream? I didn't want it to be. I wanted to save her so badly. To stop repeating history. But then again, if it wasn't a dream, she would still be alive or undead going around killing people. I turned to Kimimaro. "Shouldn't you get going? I'm sure Orochimaru wanted you to go get him once I woke up. Don't bother denying it." He turned his head away for a second, before nodding, standing, and walking to the door. He turned to me in concern. "Will you be alright alone?"

"Hai. Hai. Just go and don't worry about me. No one else really does."

"Orochimaru-sama does. He just doesn't show it much. Pay attention and look closely and you'll see it."

"Kimimaro... you only see Orochimaru-san through rose-colored glasses. If you saw him in reality, you wold understand."

"Rose-colored glasses, huh? Maybe you don't see him at all. Maybe in some aspects you're still blind." He left before I could say anything more.

I thought hard about what Kimimaro said. Is it really true? No. All I've seen him do is kill with no biaism. _He killed my husband to be and my ex-boyfriend._ So? All that meant was he gets a special thrill out of torturing me, right? My thoughts were interrupted by the quickly declining temperature of my room. I felt sick because that meant they were here. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Counting to five, slowly I opened them. Sure enough Mimiko and Li Li were standing by my bed.

"Kiki, don't be alarmed. I came to apologize. You were my only friend. I thought you left me to die. I got really upset. I still don't to leave you. Please don't say I have to!"

"What can you do? You need to move on. Both of you."

"We both are willing to become your summons. We can fight for you and protect you in battle. Let us! Think of it as our penance."

"But I-"

"We won't kill unless it's an enemy trying to harm you. We don't want to be alone."

They looked so sad and sincere. I did help her. I fixed a few things in the past but she shouldn't stay any longer. _You know if I say no, they could just follow me around, so whats the point? _"I won't let you be lonely." Behind her back, Mimiko pulled out paper. I bit my finger and drew a few things in blood. Next they bit their fingers and signed their names in the center. They came and gave me one last hug before disappearing. I folded the contract and ate it. At that moment, Orochimaru came in.

I swallowed it quickly, but not before alerting him that I had done something. Takeda appeared by my side and whispered in my ear," This mission is dangerous. I'll come with you. Be careful. He'll try to push you to your limits. And you'll meet up with a few old friends." I nodded.

"Kiki-chan I have a mission for you."

**TADA!!!! And you'll get another chapter next week. ha! ha! REVIEW.**

**(1) Help me! I'm scared! please!**

**(2) Wait a second!**

**There you go! Update, now don't kill me. REVIEW!! Next chappie will be fucked up otherwise.**


	26. The Truth About Demons

"So, what is the new mission?" Orochimaru eyed me, annoyed. With arms folded across his chest, he walked closer to me.

"What did you just put in your mouth? You ate something the second I came into the room. In case you didn't notice, I am not in the greatest of moods right now, so please don't bullshit me."

I drew a blank. I didn't want to tell him about the contract, mostly because he was a twisted bastard who would probably have me summon them to do God knows what to prisoners. On the other hand, if I don't tell him and I summon them later, I'll have a lot of explaining to do, get the crap kicked out of me as punishment, and then have option one come into play anyway. I suppose I could not use them in front of him. I don't know how much good that would do since he keeps such a sharp eye on me, but it was an idea. "I had some food with me. I was starving, so I ate it. It's only by coincidence that you came in at the same time."

Orochimaru was now within touching distance. I felt the intense anger radiating off of him, immediately knowing that he wasn't kidding about his mood. Before I could move, he grabbed me by my hair and brought my face near his. "Well, you see I don't believe in coincidences, but I believe in consequences for your lying. I'll give you one last chance." His free hand snaked around my body and rested on my numb hip. "So? Would you like to change your answer?" My hip was numb because that's near where my kidney was replaced. This would hurt, but I couldn't say anything.

"It was only foo-" I dug my teeth into my lip as his hand trailed down and buried his fingers inbetween my stitches. The stitches ripped through my flesh and came completely free. Blood covered a majority of th bed and his hand. It didn't hurt that much because of the meds, but I faked the pain by drawing blood from my lip and "trying" to call back and stop my tears as they fell. I thought I saw Takeda, for a moment, lay his hand on my head. Next thing I know, I feel so drowsy, it's hard to keep my eyes open. I thought I heard a voice hiss and tell me I would be sorry if I fell asleep. I tried to open my eyes and stay awake, but everything was blurred. _Kiki go to sleep! We all need to talk._

All? Who was all? _But I- _

_This is important! I'm sorry but you'll have to ignore Orochimaru-san._

_Hayaku (1) Kiki! _Kaji's voice screeched through my mind. No choice then...

_I looked at Kaji and Takeda, who stood in the center of my mind. I had no recongition of this place though. It seemed darker, more agonized, and just plain unfamiliar. "Enjoy the decorations? Funny how you don't even reconize your own head! You may not have realized this, but you've changed a lot since we last spoke in here. And sorry about Iro-kun. I loved him like a pet dog." Takeda stepped forward, giving Kaji a warning look. It didn't even phase her though. "And one thing about precious Orochimaru-"_

_"You said that you had an emergency issue to speak with me about? Or is it you want me to be brought to near death?"_

_"Excuse me, but I was talking. Orochimaru stole that red necklace thing you had. (From chapter one) He knew that's what connected us in the outside world. Without it I can't come around and it gets harder to exist. It holds my power, my essence."_

_"First, how did he know it connected us? Second, I fail to see the problem in that."_

_"Well, I may have told him when I tried to get into his pants."_

_"NANI!?" I advanced ready to kill her._

_"Calm down. I said tried. He only wants you in his pants. Sadly, he thinks of us as two different people." I stopped. I felt relieved and flattered and confused. "But if it makes you feel better, I did grab his cock and give it a few good tugs." She was a dead bitch._

_"Kiki-chan." Takeda stepped in with genuine concern on his face. "Listen, you may not like Kaji, but this is important and it does affect you. The world survives by balance. Balance can be separated into 3s: the good, the bad, and the soul in between. Kaji obviously being the bad-"_

_"Iie, wakarimasen (2)... 3? I'm only one, well two. But I hate counting Kaji as me."_

_"You are 3. The youkai form is your bad. The human form is your good. The hanyou form is your soul in between. Kaji. Hayashi. Kiki. Without one, the other cannot exist. Kiki, face it, Kaji is a part of you. She dies, you die. There is no getting rid of her, ever."_

_Kaji smirked with a gleam in her eyes. She knew it was actually painful for me to except this truth even though I had known it all along. Kaji came to my side and patted my back in false sympathy, as I dropped to my knees. I dragged my fingers across the stone floor, slowly tightening them into a fist."Just think of me like your sister, who will always be there for you." Slowly Kaji squatted down next to me and whispered quietly and secreively in my ear. "Do you want to know the truth about demons?" I shot my head up to meet Kaji's amused face. She wasn't lying._

_"What truth?"_

_"Yes or no. 5...4...3...2..."_

_"Fine."_

_"Demons are-" I doubled over in pain as Takeda attacked Kaji. Usually, when Kaji was hurt, I was hurt. That was one of the downsides to being linked. Blood spewed from Kaji's lips as did mine. Like a pike, Takeda's arm had completely shot through her. I felt blood pouring from my chest. I looked down and saw no wound. Removing my clothes, I saw black pooling under the skin on my chest. Internal bleeding. I heard pained snickering. "Baka, didn't you forget something?"_

_Takeda thrust Kaji into the wall. Not waiting for her to collapse on her side, he rushed to me and healed my wound (but not Kaji's). "Gomenasai. You know how I get when I lose my temper. But hey, more proof on how you are one with Kaji, ne?" A smile was forced on his lips. "Pay no attention to Kaji. She isn't exactly the most reliable source. Even if there was a truth, what would be the importance?" I pondered his words carefully. Wouldn't it depend on the secret? Besides if it's being kept secret, it has to be important, ne? As my pain disappeared, I groaned outwardly as thoughts of what Orochimaru was planning to do to me consumed all thoughts._

_"Why couldn't this wait until after, when Orochimaru-san was in a good mood? I'm sure all this could've waited an hour or day."_

_"Ima dare wa baka desu ka? (3) In a day, your cycle repeats again. We don't know exactly when the mission will start, just that it's soon." During my cycle, when I become human, Kaji is completely repressed and for some reason Takeda has a harder time connecting with me. "You can go now, but promise to be careful." I was about to leave, but Kaji appeared in front of me with the smuggest grin. Takeda was kick hard in his chest, which knocked him into the far back, into a wall._

_"Demons are the ones who fall from grace. Anyone can become one. Angels, humans, hell even animals. Sometimes souls merge together. Don't look so surprised. You've had some idea. Fallen angels. Humans losing their humanity. Animals becoming animalistic. You know, Orochimaru is a demon now, but once he was human."_

_"So?" I said it in a calm confident voice, but I wasn't. Demon? Him? It made sense, but something was off. I couldn't pin point what, but still... His eyes weren't human. Are humans who are demons ever truly human? I wanted to ask, but with Takeda against this I couldn't waste time. With my hands I motioned for her to hurry as I continously looked over my shoulder, like some sort of junkie suffering from paranoia._

_"So he's not to be trusted-"_

_"And you are?"_

_"I'll let you in on a secret. Your husband-to-be is still alive. He never died, nor was he going to die. And Orochimaru already knew about your past. Partially. What he didn't tell you was about that nasty little disease. The massacred villagers had a disease and that was what Orochimaru experimented with on him. You're the reason the other village was destroyed. He was looking for the last survivor of that village that held the virus. You hold it, but are immuned. He never really knew it was you though. He thought it was a false lead, which is why he let you let the others go. He figured it out when you went into your seizure. Ta-ta." Roughly, I was shoved out of my own mind, back into a harsh reality._

I kept my eyes closed to fein sleep as confusion held me down. Annoyed tapping made me wonder if I chose wisely. Before I could decide, my cursemark burned so bad I sat up and clutched my chest. "How nice of you to join me again. Just so you know, I consider pretending to sleep lying to me." The voice was anything but amused. While you were busy, I took the liberty of searching through your room for some... entertainment." I cocked my head in his direction to see a vaguely familiar book in his hands. He tilted it up for me to get a better look, but it was pointless. The book was a hard-cover and faded green. On the spine, back, and cover, the same worn-out color dominated. No words were present. " Don't remember it, ne? Let me refresh you, " From a randomly selected page, he began,

"When he had spoke, the sinner raised his hands

Pointed in mockery and cried: "Take them God!

I level them at thee." From that day forth

The serpents were my friends; for 'round his neck

One of them rolling twisted as it said,

"Be silent, tongue!" Another to his arms

Upgliding, tied them, riveting itself

So close..."

The Divine Comedy of Dante Alighieri: Hell, Purgatory, Paradise. It was an old book that I hadn't read in years. I had almost forgotten it existed, after stuffing it away in my hope chest! Funny, especially since it was my favorite book. That particular book was given to me by an old woman in the village. She ran into some money trouble and needed to sell a few of her things. She told me that that book was... in my hope chest. My hidden hope chest, specifically being hidden from Orochimaru. No. Maybe I had reread it and left it out. Maybe it fell out when I last looked in or moved my chest.

"...But spaked not; yea, stood motionless-"

"Where did you find that book? I don't think I remember it being in my room."

"Come now, don't lie to me of all people. You know where I found it; in that hope chest of yours. It took me a while to find it, so don't be discouraged about your sneaking abilities. I had a lot of free time, though, with you asleep."

Panic consumed me. It was doing that a lot these days. Was there anything in there I didn't want him to see? No. Yes! I had that picture I drew... "O-orochimaru-sama? What all did you find in there? Did you look through all of it?" The grip on my blankets that so horribly hurt my hand was my own. I wasn't sure if I could believe his answer, if he even gave me one.

His eyes narrowed in suspicion as a frown creased into his face. "Why? Is there something you're keeping from me? Or just something you don't want me to see?" He stood up and towered over me with anger glazing over his eyes. I don't understand why he's so angry!

"They are my personal belongings that are dear to me. If anything happens to them..." I stopped there. There wasn't anything I could do. I sighed. Sometimes the only strategy left is to swallow your pride. "Please don't do anything with or to my things. I'm terribly sorry for upsetting you and undermining your authority. Please forgive me Orochimaru-sama." His eyes never wavered. Leaning over, he placed both hands on both sides of my head. I was forced to stare up, directly into those eyes. Slowly, he moved his head down in preparation to kiss me. I had the sudden urge to pull him on to the bed and fuck him senseless. Sometimes nearing my cycle, my animalistic side tried to take over. Once, I stopped on a roadside just to howl at the moon. I had a bunch of other dog join in on the fun, just to be chased for 5 miles so the nearby village could sleep. It was fun.

His lips barely brushed against mine before he stopped and hissed,"Slut. I bet you're a good fuck." A smirk graced his unoccupied lips, now.

I was desperate to turn the tables, but also curious. There wouldn't ever be an exactly proper time to bring up the subject, so why not sooner rather than later? "Where is my fiance?" His body jerked up into a normal position. He looked down on me surprised. Quickly, a second short of immediately, regaining composure, he frowned.

"He's dead. He's been dead for some time now."

Now I was angry. It's one thing to lie to my face, but to lie to me when I know the truth... well it pissed me off. "Don't lie to me. I know the truth. He's alive! What have you been doing to him? The last time I saw him, he was traumatized enough. Now with him alive, only God knows what's happening to him."

The corners of his mouth turned up as fangs glistened in the light. "God. God. God. You should be a preacher. You speak of God so often and pray and is his perfect little slave. Tell me what has God done for you so far. You're stuck with me, aren't you? Your friends are dying left and right or just going through hell. And there is the fact that now you'll be an active participant in all my experiments. I hope you don't have hemophobia or are squeemish."

"God works in mysterious ways. Just because our lives haven't gone the way you want them to, doesn't mean you should turn your back." Quietter than before she whispered, thinking Orochimaru wouldn't hear, "Why is being stuck with you so bad?"

He leaned over and whispered gently and almost soothingly,"I'm glad you feel that way." He stood and walked to the door. Without turning back he said, "Come to my room to pack your stuff. I'll be there to supervise you."

"Chotto matte! Why is my stuff in your room?"

"Actually it's our room now. I can't trust you alone, so here's my solution. Plus I tore up every floor board until I was able to find it. I hope you don't kick in your sleep. We have to share the bed. And I hope you don't mind that all I sleep in is my boxers." His face held a dirty smile as I noticed the erection in his pants, straining to break out.

**Yo.**

**1. hurry**

**2. no I don't understand**

**3. Now who's the idiot.**

**Review. Sorry. I know it wasn't that good. I planned for this chapter for a while but it just didn't seem to come out right. tell me what you think. 2 people favorited my story this week. I fully expect them to review. Jaa ne.**


	27. Murders, Mikos, and Monsters

I uncomfortably began to pack my bags as Orochimaru stayed in the doorway to watch me do so. Luckily, the mission had something happen and we had to leave sooner than expected. I packed four days worth of food, three books (the two I bought on my last mission and The Divine Comedy), two machetes, and a partridge in a pear tree. (okay, my sketch book) I stared at my fully-stocked bag. I was briefed on the point of the mission, but only told that we would travel with Fuiro (fuckingshittygoddamnedsonofabitchscrewedupwhore) and Nana while Orochimaru once again posed as Koto-san. We were not going back to the shrine, but still we accepted a mission from them. I would be fully-informed by the time everyone came together. None of us were to wear the traditional miko outfit because we were undercover, so I had on a sleeveless, button up shirt and partially worn out blue jeans. For some reason, I also wore a tan cowboy hat. An ironic realization hit me and I badly suppressed my giggling fit.

Orochimaru's eyes narrowed. He walked up behind me and peeked over my shoulder to see what I was laughing at. Unfortunately, I was holdind my sketch book. I had it half put away in my back, but I never completely finished it. He snatched it out of my hands before interragating me. "What in here was so funny? Please share." I saw him flip through it and stop on a page with widening eyes. But with my cat-like reflexes the second he stopped, I grabbed it from his hands. He rose an eyebrow. "You my dear have a twisted mind." A hand began to slide down the back of my shirt. "But don't worry, I still love you." A calloused tongue lapped at my cheek.

"Nani? I was laughing at the irony of the situation. You keep accepting jobs from a place of religion when you happen to be void of it. What did I do so twisted?" He smirked and grabbed my sketch book once again. He turned to the page he was on before and - behold! The picture I drew of Fuiro. Yes well, what was left of Fuiro. You see in the drawing, she may or may not have met an unfortunate accident concerning rabid dogs and swords and weapons that may or may not have spontaneously attacked her. "I never saw that picture before in my life." I drew it the day after I saw Orochimaru with Fuiro. Towards the back was one I drew after Iro died. It had Fuiro _and _Orochimaru in that one. Them, plus a few yards of barb wire. "I swear."

"I don't care when, where, or whether you drew it. I just never knew you had it in you." He kneeled down behind me and started groping my breasts. "After the mission, if you want, you could kill Fuiro any way you desire. The only thing is, I would like to be present." His tongue was travelling up my neck. A few of his fingers were moving down my stomach. Destination? In between my legs. I did all that I could in that position. Being as swift as I possibly could, I took my elbow and planted it in his gut or at least tried. In my current position I missed and hit him in the kidneys. **(A/N: Karma!) **He fell back, but only an inch, landing on his back. Propping himself up with his elbow, I went back to the old topic we were discussing.

"I don't want to kill her. She's sometimes a real bitch though. She may piss me off a lot, but to slaughter her like in the picture? No, but hey! A girl can dream, can't she? Besides, killing someone in cold blood is accepting and embracing evil. I'm not like, nor would I ever want to be like you." Something flashed through his eyes, leaving as quickly as it came. A shove with his hand and I was against the wall. He was kissing me forcefully, too forceful. I bit his lip hard and pushed him away.Blood dripped from my mouth and mistaking it for my saliva, I absently used my tongue to lick up it up. Orochimaru stared, followed by him lunging at me once again. Now I was prepared. I held out my hands and put him in a headlock. His eyes were animalistic when he charged me, so I decided to calm him down. I didn't want to anger him since in a little bit the cycle would start and I was horny. I nibbled on his ear and whispered in my sexiest voice,"Not interested. Sorry. But maybe later... If your a good boy?"

A smirk crossed his face. "Later, I'll be posing as a man of God. How can I not be a good boy?" I felt sick. Seeing the nausia on my face, he 'comforted' me. "Don't worry. I wouldn't do that to you! I made plans with Fuiro, so calm down." I felt worse. I replied by saying fine. "Follow me. We're heading to the rendezvous point now." I was about to ask 'where would that be?', but since he was one step ahead of me he began to answer," It's at a bar in the town of Naraku. (1)" Naraku? Sounds so inviting and safe... We walked slowly on the way there. I happily walked hand in hand with Rei and he made sure to walk close to me. I kept noticing Orochimaru peer over his shoulder to look at me it utter annoyance.

Rei shifted in discomfort often on our trip. "Kiki?" I turned my head in acknowledgement. "I don't think that man... that Oroshimaro-san? likes me very much. Are you sure it's okay to travel with him? Maybe we should have stayed behind or-" His voice trailed off and I realized with a start we all had stopped and Orochimaru was sending a violent glare our way. Rei noticed, too. Unfortunately... "Is there a problem, sir?" I removed my hand from Rei's, pulled his head towards my mouth, and whispered in his ear," Don't make him mad. We didn't really have a choice in the matter. And his name is Oro_chi_ma_ru_-sa_ma _but on this mission call him Koto-sama Try not to talk to him, too. Things, no matter how small, can easily set him off. Promise to be careful. Please?" I moved his face and gave him a quick peck on the lips. I realised my mistake only when Orochimaru's killing intent poured from every direction.

I turned to Orochimaru with a bored look on my face. He was absolutely livid. I saw his palms drawn up into fists and his eyes... God couldn't even describe the fury held within them. I was unsure what to do at that point. If I made a wrong move Rei would most likely end up dead. If I did nothing Rei would end up dead. If I did the rightthing we would carry on our merry little way, but there was no right way here. "I'm sorry for displeasing you and holding up the mission by idle chit-chat. I won't let it happen again." With Rei hands clutching mine once again, Orochimaru turned away and continued walking. I was surprised, but I remembered why he couldn't do anything. I leaned in conspicuously towards Rei and whispered," The only reason he's not doing anything is because he's undercover. He needs to maintain a certain... identity. We will feel his wrath eventually, though."

The vegetation surrounding us, died down as a town came into view. It seemed like a nice, quaint town. Glowing flames flickered invitingly. Upon entrance, a nice young man said hello and welcomed us into "our humble little home." "Eeto... Is there a library here?"

"Hai. It's downtown. Sadly, it's one of the few buildings here that weren't renovated. It does have a wide book selection, though. And a bookstore is joined with it."

I turned to Koto. "May we go there?"

"No, but don't worry. I have a better place in mind. Follow me." Koto motioned for us to come to him, but I persisted.

"Doko?" (5) I was a little suspicious and I had no reason not to be.

A smirk played on his lips as he playfully stated, " Hi-mi-tsu." (6) Putting his hands in his pockets, Koto walked forward. I waved good bye to the nice man who helped us, but he wasn't there anymore. I had a bad feeling, but shrugged it off when I chased down Koto.

We stood in awe in front of a decent-sized bar. It looked like a bar. It was made of half rotten wood. A few of the planks were missing here and there and bad patch jobs covered the holes. There was no paint on the building except for an illegible sign on the door. Only one small window graced the side of the wall. Sadly, I think it may have been broken. I couldn't tell because of this weird brown stain. I was scared and reluctant to see the inside. It was obvious why this certain location was chosen. No one in their right minds would expect mikos, or anyone with a soul, to even consider going into or near this bar. Taking a deep breath, I walked inside behind Orochimaru, holding on to the back of his clothes. In the corner, Fuiro sat cross-legged, at a table, part of her leg exposed. On the other side was Nana.

Smirking, Orochimaru shook me off, ran over to Fuiro, and made sure to caress her bare leg. Oh how I missed her. Fuiro moved over and made room for Koto. He graciously took her up on her offer. Nana moved over, too, except I gave up my seat to Rei. Akwardly, he stared at his suddenly interesting feet. Using the silence between all of us as an opportunity, I took in my suroundings: chairs shuffled and screeched against the wood floors, bottles of saki clinked together, drunken slurs blew into everyone's ears, and many men with cheeks tinted pink by alcohol stared shamelessly at me. "Go enjoy yourself, Kiki-chan. We'll all talk more at our hotel room."

I glared, but decided to go look around. Maybe get Orochi- Koto jealous... "Okay. I'll go look around. I wouldn't mind getting wasted... So what hotel are we staying at? The Usade (2) Inn? ( This place has wonderful names.)" I nod was the only reaction. "Okay, then." I walked over to the counter and sat on a bar stool. Reaching into my pants, I found a very hungry wallet. Of course I had no money! Why should I? It would probably help me escape. Building up confidence, I devised a fool-proof plan in 2 seconds. "Anyone here care to buy a lady a drink?" Everyone looked at me, (including Koto) and it wasn't long before five fairly sober men came to me with an offer. I let a man named Croatoan treat me. He was a beautiful man: pale green hair with bottomless eyes to match, a long sleeved shirt hugging his girlish yet masculine figure, loose pants, and dark brown sandals. He had skin that seemed to reflect the moonlight that shown through the swinging door, yet it didn't seem unnatural. His eyes... they lured you in and kept you there.

After two cups of saki, we went out for a walk. Dew already stained the grass, quenching the thirst of the thousands of crickets singing for us. We talked about our interests, likes and dislikes. We spoke of our families and friends and what brought us to this town. I didn't concentrate on his replies though. Spiking pain from migraines plagued my every move. Desparately, I tried to block the mental images rising to sight. My attempts were proved unsuccessful as glimpses of something to quick to see flashed before my eyes. I stopped walking which alerted Croatoan. "Doushita?" (3) I tried to wave him off, but the last flash came so clear, it was as if I was there. Blood everywhere. Croatoan is sitting in the corner trying to stand. Blood. He's covered in it. One hand clutches his leg, revealing the splintered mess of bone. His long hair out of his ponytail, askew across his face. The moist wall behind him covered in moss and black sludge.

I sit up in an unfamiliar bed. The world passed by like a painting being drenched in paint thinners. Images of blood and black fade and melt into a pool slipping in between the cracks of the wood. On the floor Croatoan sat in perfect health. "Kiki-san, you are awake." As Croatoan jolted his head up in surprise, I turned to look at Kimimaro sitting by my bedside. "You collapsed."

"Kimimaro-san! I didn't expect you here. Why didn't you come with us earlier?"

"I had some things to attend to." I turned back to Croatoan, knowing Kimimaro wouldn't talk much more. "Kik-" Croatoan tried to speak. As soon as he stood, he tripped on his own feet, face first into the ground. Hopping up and scratching the back of his head in an embarrassed manner, he continued. "Kiki-chan, I was so worried! Suddenly you collapsed and then that guy was walking in the street and we brought you here."

"Arigatoo. Anoo... I suppose you want an explanation, but I can't give one. I don't know what happened." In mock realization, I put my fist in my palm. "Chotto matte, I just got out of the hospital. My sister needed a blood transfusion and we have a rare blood type. Anyway I gave her a few pints of my blood. I must of collapsed from anemia!" Relief washed over him, drowning me in guilt. And to make matters worse, Koto-san walked in the room. He was without company, so I assumed our two parties had separate rooms. Before he could speak, Croatoan filled him in.

A questioning eyebrow was pointed in my direction. "Well, Arigatoo. You took excellent care of my Kiki-chan. We need to speak of private manners though so if you would be so kind..."

"Hai. Jaa ne, Kiki-san." He left waving with a contagious grin on his face. I never noticed the blush on my face, but Koto did and that's all it took.

Koto sneered. "Worthless moron. Better off dead." I outwardly flinched. He took no notice. "Here is the mission." A manila envelope was handed to me. "The miko's hired us to help them with a job. Murders have happened frequently in this area-"

"So let the police handle it."

"Bakena. (4) The murders weren't done by _humans. _They believe it was a demon. What I want you to do is catch him. Alive if possible. If you can't, just take a few samples, or better yet bring the whole corpse back to me. Kabuto would be estatic." He spoke a little longer but I paid no attention. That vision... It meant the demon was coming to kill Croatoan.

**1. Naraku - Hell**

**2. Usade - It's a lie.**

**3. Doushita - What's wrong**

**4. Bakena - Impossible**

**5. Doko - Where**

**6. Himitsu - Secret**

**Review. It's a okay chapter I think. Sorry that the numbering is messed up. **


	28. Croatoan

All through the night, I sat up in bed wondering about Croatoan and what might become of him. So many questions raced through my head, but none were answered. I thought about telling someone about my visions, but it just... They would probably think it was ludicris. Something about Croatoan seemed off, yet he was the most normal person I met, especially considering lately. Knowing a sleepless night was ahead of me, I stood and crept to the window to look out at the moon. I opened the window and jumped out surprised at my actions. I calmed myself down about any problems with Orochimaru because he wasn't there tonight.

I stood staring at the moon, ignoring the damp chill endless winds blew in my direction. What did I know about Croatoan? He was 23. He was born on May 6, 1983. His parents died when he was little. He had no brothers or siblings and not many good friends in this town or anywhere nearby. (It seemed odd when you thought about it, so I didn't.) He had a weird little birth mark on his lower back that looked like a bunny. (So cute!) He had 50/50 vision and hated milk. (It was odd how deep that hatred ran...)

Was that it? It was... Why didn't I know more? Why was that dream nagging me so? It wasn't saying ,'save him before it's too late!' It said ,'You're not understanding! Try seeing the whole picture!' Ignorance is bliss. Sacrificing one is keeping the other. What was the worth? _Open locks, whoever knocks. _I was too scared to open them. Growling in frustration, I began wandering around. What did I want? Something inside me... changed whenever Croatoan was around. I second guessed myself. I feared many things. Vunerable. That's it. I felt vulnerable, yet so safe. I expressed my emotions so freely. It was the opposite feeling Orochimaru gave me... yet the same.

I was too far lost in my own spinning world, I stopped paying attention to what was around me. I was drifting into the darker side of town. Had I noticed, I would have ran. Looming buildings were menacing, so intimidating. Creaks and moans were emitted from strained floorboards and the shameless whores with customers. Wavering light blinked from inside stained glass windows. (Some were broken.) Shattered bottles littered the ground. Lucky or not, the pain in my left foot broke me from my stupor. I winced and hopped on one foot until I landed on the side of a building. I bit back tears as I pulled out an inch of curved glass. I discarded it by throwing it under a building.

I wasn't carrying bandages and I surely couldn't walk without risking horrid pain or infection. I made a solution to walk home now and keep my left foot balanced on my toes. It wasn't as easy as I planned in my head. First, my foot was bleeding a lot and the more force I exerted, the more blood. Second, I was losing a lot of it, so I was feeling dizzy. Third, I (not that I had a crappy sense of direction) had no idea on how to get back.

I felt like bashing my head against anything solid I came across. How could I be so stupid!? It's not that easy... I suddenly got a bad feeling.

Now, whatever happened next, I've spent a lot of time trying desperately to convince myself, 'it wasn't my fault' or 'I had no control over it', and shit like that. In all honesty tell me, when, with so many times in your life, you almost get raped, who's to blame? It gets real difficult to point your finger at your attacker.

In the haze I was in with the anemia kicking in at half-power, I stopped to listen to ragged shuffling that (I was thirty-six percent sure) was behind me. An odd melody of humming and hiccupping made me cringe. I twisted my head back to watch a burly man with wild, long, white hair in spikes, dancing by himself down the road. "Sumimasen, sir!" He spun on one foot and stared at me. His eyes scanned me head to toe, causing an odd smile to creep onto his face. If I had been thinking straight (or at all), I would have realized the approaching danger.

"Hai, hai?" Dropping to both feet, he walked unsteadily over to me. "How cans I heelp yo?" Alcohol was worn as perfume. This was sign two. I paid no attention.

"Well, anoo... I'm lost and injured. Can you help me get to my inn? It's the... It's the... I can't remember. It was on the other side of town though." His smile grew. I saw approximately thirty-six sharp jagged teeth lined up in his mouth. (Sign three?)

"Well I suppose we should just look around and wait until we find the right one."

"Oh! Arigatoo..." I left a pause suggesting he should fill in the blank, but after two minutes I asked more clearly. " Your name is what exactly?"

"Boku wa... Arashi desu. Anata?" He hesitated on saying (or choosing) his name. Sign four.

"Boku wa Kiki desu. Arigatoo Arashi-san!" I hopped over to him. "Which way first?" He gaze landed on my foot. He was smiling and now it was accompanied by an odd look. Sign five.

"What happened to your foot? It's not broken or anything is it? Are you able to walk?" He seemed eager to know if I was incapacitated. Sign six. "Here, Let me take a little peek at it!" Fingers ghosted across my skin as he examined me. Something wet slid across my ankle. I thrust my head down, but never saw anything unusual. Sign seven. "You should walk on that. Listen, just lean on me and I'll help you hobble around. Sound good?"

"Hai! Hai! Hai! Arashi-san! I don't know how I can ever repay you! When I get to the inn, how about I buy you... dinner or lunch or something?"

"Well ma'am, you might end up repaying me a lot sooner then you think." Sign eight.

I cocked my head to the side. "Nani? Doyu koto de? (1)"

He giggled. "Iie, iie. Wasuremashoo. (2)"

"Okay..." I leaned against him and he directed the way we went. He kept that twisted grin on his face throughout the whole duration of our time together. Both of us stayed quiet. I was uneasy, but never spoke up. It seemed as though he was driving me deeper and deeper into the bad part of town. Finally I knew something was up when he had us headed to go into a dark alley. "Anoo..."

"Iie! Don't worry! I knows a short cat Kiki-chan!" I began to panic a little. We headed into the alley with my thoughts running wild. The alley was clean, well unusually clean. Garabage wasn't staining the ground, and it didn't smell that awful. At the very end of it, a wooden (and locked) gate climbed high enough to make it impossible to climb. And so it began.

My collar was grabbed and I was forced into the gate. My hair was twisted into Arashi's hand and pulled back. He forced me to stare at him. "Don't worry. I won't hurt much... I promise." I took a good, long, hard look. I was ninety-five percent sure that this was the man who tried to rape me all those years ago. "I mizzed you. Did you mizz me?" He stroked my face with his cheek, covering it with grime.

The tender moment turned bad as I tried to bite him and got punched in the face. He seemed unaffected. "YAMETE! TASUKETE (3), ONEGAI!" I wasn't screaming exactly and I didn't sound scared. By noticing this, I saw an image of a frustrated Orochimaru running through my head. And now I began to cry. In some part of my head I heard the quiet pleading to Kami-sama to send Orochimaru to me to save me. I might not be able to trust him, but he would be possessive enough to kill this man for even having perverted thoughts concerning me.

Arashi-san's lips were on mine as he pulled down and discarded my pants. (and panties) I opened my mouth to call out again the second he moved from me. I, unfortunately, didn't know he only moved away to remove his pants too. As soon as he did he penis was shoved in my mouth. He was forceful, rocking his hips and using one hand to grope me. The other hand squeezed my thigh, roughly enough to bruise it. He tore my shirt badly as he looked for my tit. My stomach was left exposed, along with my breast that bore the cursemark. _Is it throbbing?_

I kept choking on it, but he wouldn't move. "Has't it gottan biggar?" He slurred at the wall. He took his fist and punched between my legs. More tears. He twisted his hand around until he was bored and then moved away from me. I spit up a little cum, making sure to aim for his feet. "Ur a big gurl na, right? So it's okay to pley wi yo like ones?"

I was injured. I had a badly bruised arm, my messed up foot, a bloody nose, a bloody mouth, a slightly bleeding head, and between my legs I was bleeding, too. I looked at the hand he sodomized me with. It had an odd ring with a tree on it. I had seen a ring like it before. I saw it... somewhere... I can't remember exactly where though... A punch to the stomach woke me from my muses. Drool slid down my chin. I lifted my hands to cover my face.

Why wasn't I doing more to protect myself? I was strong enough to survive against Orochimaru wasn't I? I was able to conquer my shikigami, right? So why? This is long overdue. It was meant to happen so long ago. Maybe this is my fault that it's happening again. History tends to repeat itself. My history will repeat, so I can't run. I'm still that same trapped child. I'm still that weak child. Maybe it's time I die.

Arashi hit the wall beside us with such a thud, the bricks behind him started crumbling. Orochimaru's foot pressed down on his face slowly, adding more pressure with each passing moment. He would do the same thing to him as he did to that doctor on the floor in Kimimaro's room all that time ago. It hurt to, but I stood up. I stumbled over to Orochimaru and held on to him from behind. "Please, don't do it." He turned his head only a fraction, but I still saw the terrifying look in his eye.

"Give me a reason why. Don't tell me he was just some secret boyfriend giving you a good fuck."

"Oro-"

"Was he or was he not raping you?"

"He was but it doesn't give you the right to kill him. Please just-"

"If I let him go, you do realize he'll just rape someone else or maybe do worse. Tell me, what do you know of this man? Nothing. For all you know he's a murderer."

I never meant to, but my eyes betrayed me. They told him I knew. They told him something had happened before. They told him he was right about so many hunches. They sent me through hell. "If you want to kill him, but make it quick."

"Fine." Arashi's head was gone in a matter of seconds. Before getting ready to leave, Orochimaru saw the man's ring. He took it off to examine it and after a few minutes, pocketed it. He took off his jacket and then draped it around my shoulder's. It was long and reached to my knees. Pale fingers zipped it up, while feeling my cold skin. He took me on his back and carried me to the inn in complete silence.

**Well, I need a shower... Sorry about last week. Be happy though, tomorrow there will be another new chapter! This is 2007 words long so be happy.**

**1 - What do you mean?**

**2 - Let's forget it**

**3 - Stop it! Save me! Please!**

**Tasukete is the same as Dasukete. Just saying. And people seriously review! I think I had a drop in reviews lately! I'm crying and it's your fault.**


	29. A Reason to Worry

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I stared up at the words, Usade Inn, and sneered. _What a stupid name._ I dug my fingernails into my palms in frustration. I wasn't precisely happy with the current change of events. Kiki was being careless and I suppose she always was, to an extent. I wasn't sure what exactly happened to her, but it had to be something odd. . . She was diffferent somehow. I guess I'd have to talk to her.

I had left to go into the worse part of town, hoping to find information on the demon, but unfortunately it wasn't meant to be. Instead I found a beaten, bloody Kiki almost being raped. Or was she raped? I was going to ask her but she was asleep for now. As soon as we got to our rooms though, she would have to take a shower. A horrible experience, rape is. In Konoha, I met quite a few rape victims. None were ever right in the head for a long time. They'd jump or scream at any and every creaking noise they heard. They broke down crying for the littlest things and some committed suicide. Their husbands got it bad too. They were utterly screwed, or in this case, not.

I smirked. She didn't scream though. She called for help, but never screamed. That meant I still had the pleasure of wringing it from her slender neck, all on my own. It also meant this didn't affect her so horribly she'd go crazy and do some foolhardy action that could expose us. Luck was on our side, I suppose.

Shaking my head, I walked in and headed straight to our rooms. However, apparently I wasn't moving fast enough. In the middle of the hallway, three feet from our room, we were stopped by none other than Croatoan. It was annoying how he appeared where ever Kiki was. It was like. . . It was like. . . It was like. . . they were an _item_. The bastard loud mouth was trying to talk to me _and her now! _"What happened to you, Kiki-chan? Koto-san is she okay? She looks a little sick."

I had to get passed him before he noticed the obvious abuse. I tried to think of an excuse, but I kept getting sidetracked by the way that man continued to look at her. It was the final straw when he reached out to touch her face. I felt his hand brush my shoulder as his thumb glided over her lips. She began to stir. "Well, Kiki couldn't handle me as well as she thought she could. I guess she bit off more than she could chew. But considering she _was_ a virgin, she wasn't half bad." I pushed past him and entered my room.

It sure didn't end there though. That would have been too easy, ne? He grabbed the door before it closed and forced his way in. "You sure she'll be fine? I mean, she looks really beat up."

"Yes, now lea-"

"Well if you need anything, I'm in the room next to you."

"Nani!?" When did that happen? It sure as hell wasn't like that yesterday!

"Yeah, quite a coincidence! Come visit me anytime!" I so planned to. I slammed the door shut, but it wouldn't close. "mY FinGERs! TheY're IN tHe DooR!" His voice sounded weird, raising and lowering of it's own accord. I reassured him I'd get them unstuck. I pressed the door harder in and listened to the wonderful hissing he made. I managed to torture him a little bit, while still seeming kind and concerned before I decided to get back on track.

I opened the door with worry in my eyes. Croatoan's knuckles were badly bruised and bleeding. I grabbed his hands and inspected them closely. "Should I go get some bandages or anti sep-"

"No. It's fine. I have plenty in my room. Ja ne. I hope Kiki-chan gets better." I watched him retreat to his room. My eyes hardened as I quickly became sick with being kind and gently with bumbling idiots. I turned back around and headed into the room absently licking my finger clean of the exotic blood. It tasted. . . different. The flavor was thicker, sweeter.

"Koto-sama, What happened to Kiki-san? Will she be fine?" Kimimaro looked up from the tea he was staring at when I left him.

I gave a small acknowlegding nod. "She'll be fine. Help me. Open the bathroom door and start running some hot water." As soon as Kimimaro left, I was surprised to learn that Kiki was fully awake. She muttered something under her breath. It was hard to make out but it sounded like a poem of some sorts. It wouldn't blow me away if she was. She did like poetry. I quieted and strained my hearing.

_Our Father, who art in heaven,  
Hallowed be thy Name.  
Thy kingdom come.  
Thy will be done,  
On earth as it is in heaven.  
Give us this day our daily bread.  
And forgive us our trespasses,  
As we forgive those who trespass against us.  
And lead us not into temptation,  
But deliver us from evil._

She was reciting the lord's prayer. The lord's prayer wasn't exactly the 'Now I lay me down to sleep' prayer. It was something people said as a final right. "Idiot," I hissed (I couldn't help it)," You're not going to die anytime soon. Pull it together." I turned my head towards her. When I finished my lecture, she kissed me. It wasn't much; just a light peck, but hey it was something. The only problem is her lips tasted... tainted.

I hurried her in the tub. This tub was only big enough for one, meaning I couldn't join her this time. It was plain white and contained a dozen hair-lined cracks. The ground it rested on were tan tiles with no picture or design on it. There was no window or curtains. The sink resembled the bathtub but was even smaller. The bathroom itself was fairly small and archeic. Nothing stood out. It was decorated in such a manor that Orochimaru himself would enjoy it.

Taking a washcloth into his hands, Orochimaru scrubbed at Kiki's skin until it was red and raw. Kiki was still awake, but not talking. She had her mouth shut and her head up facing forward. She didn't even flinch, even though I knew what I was doing was way uncomfortable for her. In simpler explaination, she acted like a corpse. The one time she moved was towards the end to mumble her gratitude.

She never made a move to get out of the tub, so he never made a move to leave."Why didn't you fight back?" I was no idiot. I knew Kiki and she was strong enough to defend herself against a _civilian_ of that caliber.

"I wonder." Two simple words. Oh, how she could amuse me at times.

"Why is it you never show emotion? You never listen to others unless you like what's been said. You're such a weak fool. You're a mockery to all ninja and especially as one that serves me, the most feared. You're so strong and smart and independent and that's what makes you so damned irresistable." I kissed her lips more forcibly than necessary. I let my hands wander, but it made Kiki flinch. I didn't let up. I don't remember her being that strong, but in a second she was.

Her hand was around my neck pushing me against the wall even though I was already against it. She was out of the tub now. It was fun to watch her try to kill me, especially when she's naked. Her grip loosened suddenly and she pulled away. "Leave, now." I chuckled, but all the same left. I needed to do a little research on something...

Orochimaru unconsciously fingered the ring in his pocket.

**Kiki's POV:**

I quickly put on a pair of clothes and rushed out to the main room. Orochimaru was already gone, but Kimimaro was sitting down looking into a tea cup. I'm not sure why or how long he had been doing that, but it probably meant something was bothering him. "Kimimaro-kun? Doushita? Are you sick?"

"Iie. I was just wondering about Orochimaru-sama. . . What are you doing to him?" He stared up at me and when our eyes met the impact of the question hit me. I don't know what he meant exactly. Something is wrong with Orochimaru? It didn't take a genius to figure that out.

"I don't understand what you mean."

"Well, he acts differently around you. He pays a lot more attention to you. And he's always touching you. Even when your asleep. You are always treating him like he's the trash and yet you are still kept alive. What have you done?"

"Nothing. . . It's complicated to explain. . . Have you asked Orochimaru-san about it?" He slowly shook his head in the negative. "Well. . . If you're so concerned, ask him. I'm sure he'll have an answer."

"Hm." My intentions weren't that pure. I was secretly hoping that if someone brought this up Orochimaru would tone his actions down a bit. I had a right to dream. Kimimaro probably wouldn't bring it up, though. I knew him. He wouldn't want to upset his master.

I left to next door after giving a quick call to Kimimaro to say I was going to my friend's room.. I was awake to hear the whole fiasco with Croatoan, but due to my tiredness, did nothing to save the man's fingers. I would so apologize for that. I stood in front of his door and knocked. "Where are you going?"

Who was behind me? Who else, but Orochimaru! "Koto-san, I was going to have a little visit with my friend. Is there a problem with that?" Orochimaru never moved from the wall he was so nonchalantly leaning on. His eyes remained closed and his arms were folded across his chest.

"Maybe I do." He opened his eyes and moved towards me. "Maybe, I know what'll happen if I let you go. Once a slut, always a slut. I won't say much, but if I find out that he touched you, I'll kill him. I'll kill him slow and painfully and in front of your eyes that will be forced open. Do you understand?" His arms worked as bars as his body pinned me to the wall. His voice held such danger and vigor I thought it best to listen.

"Hai."

The door opened behind me and before I could move, Orochimaru was touching me. His knee pressed between my legs, his hand was grabbing my ass, his other hand was fondling me, and he was violently kissing me. Croatoan stood watching dumbfounded. I continuously struggled against Orochimaru with no avail. Partly because he was acting like my rapist, and partly so Croatoan wouldn't get a wrong idea. Too late, ne?

Suddenly, I was released. "Ja ne Kiki-chan. I'll come to the door to pick you up if I need to." He gave a small nod to Croatoan and walked into Fuiro's room. Five seconds later Nana was forced out the door. She picked up a blanket and pillow that were tossed out beside her and made a neat bed outside the door.

I blinked. "Ummm Nana-"

"I'm fine. Please don't worry about me."

"Okay. . . You might want to move your makeshift bed over, away from the door. Otherwise you might get hurt."

"No, I won't."

"If the door opens, it will slam right into you."

"Oh yeah. . ."

I turned and walked towards Croatoan's room. "Ya know, you should stand up to that loose priestess." I ran inside before Nana could respond.

I stared at Croatoan as he poured the tea into my cup. I had only been in here for fourteen minutes yet already something was off. I just thought I might be feeling a bit akward because I told him the truth. About what had happened in town, not about Orochimaru or Otogakure. He had stayed silent and went to get me a drink. The silence hurts so bad, but I have no idea why. A horrible feeling crept inside of me. In a way, I had a sense that told me he was like Orochimaru. I couldn't lose the feeling. I was afraid of him for a brief moment. "Sugar? Cream?" He handed me a cup of tea.

"No thank you. Sugar and cream? That's odd stuff to put in tea. . ." I gave a stout, nervous laugh. Croatoan did nothing. His hands stayed wrapped around his cup, obsorbing the warmth it held. His eyes were casted down onto my hands gripping the tea cup in such a way. Reaching over, he took a spoon, dished out some sugar, and stirred it in his cup. He took another container and poured a little cream in it, too.

Quietly, he spoke. "It isn't a way the Japanese prepare it I suppose. I'm not exactly from around here if you haven't guessed." More time passed of akward silence. "Why didn't you go to the police? Or the hospital? So he just brought you here after you were traumatized and thought 'well she'll be fine!?' And then he goes and ravishs you in the hallway like nothing was wrong? What's the matter with that man!?"

"Nothing. Croatoan-kun, you wouldn't understand." I wasn't sure what to say. There wasn't much I _could_ say. One little slip up would jepordize the mission or reveal too much. Both wouldn't go well with Orochimaru. "Listen. It's very complicated and I don't think you need to get involved or burden yourself with my problems. It's not like they're important." I took a deep breath. "I should go now." I stood and tried to turn away.

Clinking and the sound of splashing slowed me down, but what stopped me was the hand that grabbed my arm. Croatoan had leaned over the table, knocking over the cups and kettle of tea, and latched on to me with concern in his eyes. "How could you say that to me? You _are_ very dear to me. I know we haven't known each other that long, but still I trust you. Don't you trust me? And you can't just leave. If your psycho, possessive boyfriend isn't going to help you, then I sure as hell will. Please stay."

He sealed the discussion with a lingering kiss. In case you're wondering how this was accomplished, he pulled me down onto the tea-soaked table and our lips met. When I pulled away, I was dazed. I had forgotten to breath. "I trust you...If you think I'm together with Koto-san, why would you touch me like that? Why do you care so much?" I felt so sad and confused and slutty. _I felt like I was his property! I felt like I was betraying him! _With my mind twisted, I sat down and cried. _Damn tears!_

Warmth encircled me. At first I was startled, but then I relaxed and let it take over me. The hug Croatoan had forced me into was so calming. "Maybe, I was living on the fantasy you would leave him for me? Maybe because for some unknown reason, I fell in love with you the second I saw you. Maybe because you're so good to touch..." His hand roamed up my shirt and rested on my stomach. His lips skidded across my neck as I leaned away to give him access.

He stopped and brought his hand to my face. "Don't cry any more. I can protect you, if you let me." Gently, he wiped away my tears. I finished my meloncholy a while ago, but the tears had still stained my face. "Possesive bastard." Something rough brushed against my neck. Across the floor, a cat collar was tossed. It was a dark purple and held a circular tag that said: _Property of Hibana Koto. _I stayed still for a second. My body was killing my mind. I couldn't think straight through all my yearning. Maybe, it wouldn't kill me to succumb...

Mentally, I slapped myself, over and over again. What was I thinking? I promised to hold out for marriage!_ But it's sooo nice to have a snack before dinner... NO!_ An argument went on inside my head for five minutes before I felt spiking pleasure surge through me. Croatoan found my breasts and kindly thought enough to play around with my hardened nipples. It felt so nice. I stood and absently repositioned my self ontop of him. Now I was straddling him while he still sat. My tongue darted around his mouth, fighting with his, as I threaded my fingers into his soft hair.

This was going to happen. It didn't matter whether or not I was caught in the moment or was ready. Something in my head said this was my last chance to be with him and I would regret it otherwise. I took a plunge as I moved my hand down and grabbed his cock. His body went completely rigid. He was so hard. I began to take off his pants. When I did I pulled down my underwear, not bothering to remove my skirt, but he stopped me. "No. Is this really how you want it? A quick fuck on the floor?" His voice came out as panted breaths. He was trying to sound kind. Partially

"N-no but please! I need it so bad! You do too. Guys can't every deny it." I grabbed his cock and gave it two good pumps. He moaned so loudly, before he pushed me away. He stood, pulled up his pants, led me to the bedroom, and sent me to the bed. When I sat down, I quickly undressed. I laid there naked as he tried not to stare or jump me and talk to me, all at the same time. I waved my finger at him, hoping he would listen to the beckon. He didn't. Part of me was relieved at the thought that he held morals and self-control. Even better was his respect and understanding of me.

"I'm not like him. Okay? We should get through this like adults. Like uhhh... talk about your sexual history. I need to know if you have any STDs. And ummm... there's birth control... And there's... are you bi? Not that it matters... And then I should tell you about mine... Umm. I am perfectly healthy. I once had gonnorhea, but you know I'm good now. Ummm... I don't have any condoms. Or birth control pills...because... yeah..." It was so cute watching him squirm around like that. I gave a laugh at his expense.

I quited down as I began rattling off useless details. "Well, let's see... Where to begin... I know I'm a virgin...Unfortunately, I'm only three percent sure that I don't have a STD... I'm pretty much sterile... the chances of me bearing your child is slim. Yes, I am bisexual. Mostly, it's just men, but once there was a woman. Satisfied?" He nodded vigorously.

"V-vir-virgin!?" Sudden realization hit him in the face like a ton of bricks. "You're a virgin!? How? Why? He- you- said and what?" I was so tired of the questions. Plus he was speaking so incoherently, I didn't understand him at all. I pressed my lips to his, dragging him onto the bed and then it began. Croatoan's body hovered over Kiki's. At first it was only kissing and a few carresses here and there. Things started getting serious after six minutes.

When he finally penetrated her, she screamed. It was an odd pain she had not expected. Sex for what she had been told, was good. A thought in her head told her it ws because she was a virgin. After a little time passed, the pain turned to ecstasy(somewhat), but enough to encourage her to be more active. She began to push her body closer to his and grinding her hips in a steady rhythm. Blood poured from her legs. _There goes my innocence._ Croatoan didn't seem to mind. Kiki tried to keep her composure as she dug her claws into his back. She didn't want to worry him, but it still hurt. A lot. The pleasure was fading away again.

Hands groped her thighs, forcing her legs apart more. A bite on her neck made flinch and hiss out his name. As his teeth retracted from her skin, he began sucking. Unknown to Kiki, he was leaving his mark for Koto to see. "St-top!" Croatoan happily ignored her Everything was beginning to become painful. Fingers entangled in each others hair. Rough, bruising kisses were forced on her flesh. Kiki pulled Croatoan's head down to her breasts and called out his name as he sucked them. He took everything the wrong way.

Kiki was tired of not doing enough to help out and pushed Croatoan on his back, taking control. If she was having sex she was damn well gonna make it right. She forced Croatoan deeper inside her. She nipped at his lip, drawing blood. She took her finger and wiped it away. She moved back and stroked his cock. When he shivered, he went animalistic and took control all over again.

Through all the moaning both did, neither heard the knock on the door. When it got demanding even to the point of not being able to ignore, a breathless Croatoan merely brushed it under the carpet. "Don't worry. I wasn't expecting anyone or anything. It's probably not that important." Kiki looked up into his eyes and for a second saw Orochimaru's face with a mixture of sadness and anger. She blinked and it was Croatoan's smiling face.

The night continued for four hours until Croatoan finally came. The whole night was actually klumsy and uncomfortable, but I pretended to be on the top of the world. When it was over Kiki got dressed and excused herself. Outside the room, Orochimaru sat on the ground and tossed shuriken at the opposing wall. Eyes lazily trailed over to her. Anger flashed through them and he turned away in disgust, throughing the weapons with more manevolence. Kiki walked silently by. She was tired of justifying herself.

"Slut. I told you so."

"Gomenasai."

I sat on my bed and wondered. I wondered about the people living in such a mechanical world, running like clockwork, who long ago lost the freedom of thoughts. Thoughts that mattered. Thoughts that made no sense and had no place. I wondered about the woman who sat alone and dreamed. They dreamed and dreamed, but never would they think to take action, leave the warm, safe cacoon they built their lives as just to venture into such a cold, unforgiving world.

I wondered what freedom was. I wondered if we are free, or have we just trapped our mind and forced ourselves to work like the ones around us. I wondered to stop from wondering about Orochimaru, but my thought kept leading to him. _Orochimaru is free. Orochimaru and Kiki. That's how he wanted it. Reality. Kiki. Orochimaru. Both alone. _I couldn't argue the truth.

Last night I lost my virginity to Croatoan. Orochimaru has abandoned me in his own way because of it. He's colder, avoids any if not all conversation, and he has no acknowledgement of me now. _I crossed the line. I have always belonged to no one. Where do I belong? _Small racing thoughts of me outside on such a beautifully sunny day sitting happily on a grassy hill, watching little children run by and play with each other. _Reality. _I sit alone in a cold room collecting guilt for loving a man, other than one who lov- wants me. _Such a stinging pain._ I pulled my knees to my chin and hugged them, hoping to find a warmth to melt the ice that formed from the gathering emptiness and confusion. It didn't help. Nothing could help because I could never understand. I could never let these feelings, emotions, and thoughts free, for the fear and cold refused to stop restricting me.

I'm the lost lamb of the sheperd, curiousity leading me farther away, fear forcing me onward. _Susume (1), Kiki. Nothing's left behind you._ What was left? Memories. Memories of a woman who died a long time ago. I was a sad, pitiful shell of a woman who would go forward or back if she pleases, who loved whomever she wished, who had unwavering faith. I was broken. In his displeasure, his hate, torture, and abuse he broke me down into this hollow ghost I am today. _Nonexistant. You were given your own hell. _Hell. I have created my own hell. _Drowning in your sins. _Forgiveness. Absolvement. _Your virtues? _Kindness. Humility. Temperance. Patience. Charity. Diligence. Chastity? _Chastity opposes Lust. You aren't pure of body anymore._

I was bleeding. Blood seeped through the cloth covering my arms. I couldn't feel the pain from my nails digging into my flesh. _It's numbing to not know yourself anymore._ I stood and headed to the bathroom, spending the duration bandaging my arms. I wanted forgiveness, but I would never recieve any from Orochimaru so all I could do was try going to next best thing. I changed into a wool, (or perhaps cashmiere) turtleneck sweater. It was so soft to touch that I ignored the dreary color of gray that matched the mood. My pants were long and black. I walked out of the inn into the cold night. It wasn't precisely night, but the sunset was almost over and the usual explosion of colors long faded. I walked foward, staring at the small clouds I blew mix in with the densing fog.

I headed to the cathedral. I was planning to absolve my sins by relieving myself through the confessional. I stayed still for a second to watch the only tree that was left with a blend of orange and golden leaves. The light that was left from the sun glittered onto it, creating the small flickering equivilants to a candle's blazing flame. _God made Moses' destiny clear when he spoke to him as the burning bush._ A burning tree that would not burn. I trudged forward to the church with uplifted spirits and stronger hope. _Sacrament of Penance. _Why was I low on faith in the first place? My thought sounded so rebellious as I stared up at the archaic building in awe. His house was truly the most beautiful sight in the world.

A tan brown was the color of the slowly disintegrating brick that towered at least three stories. Wooden shingles neatly were lined up at the top as were the windows. A display of art was written on each different stained-glass window. Colors of blue, red, yellow, and green highlighted the saints that guarded His home. There was no threat here. There was no black or white, but the beautiful combination gray. I walked up the steps, somewhat surprised to see that they had no cracks or crevices.

The inside was just as miraculous. The saints were still seen, leaving me reassured for some reason. Mahogany pews stretched for what seemed a mile. That came as no surprise though. I felt so very small here. At the very front, behind the place where the priest delivers his sermon, a large crucifix rested peacefully. _He died for our sins. _Candlelight not only brightened the shadows and darkened corners in here, but illuminated the serenity. Spotting the rows of confessionals near the top right corner, I treaded lightly on the red carpet outlined with gold. The inside of it was small, but after settling on the kneeler, I could fit better. The curtain from which I entered was black while everything else was brown.

I heard the sliding of wood and stared at the "window" that showed a brief look of what the priest's outline was. "Forgive me Father for I have sinned. It has been..." I hesitated because for the life of me I couldn't remember. Suddenly, everything was a blur. I took a few deep breaths and calmed down. "It has been about one year since my last confession. I'm not completely sure why it's been so long. Perhaps it's because before, I never doubted myself or God." I stopped. I would risk a lot talking to this man, but I came for a reason and nothing could make me lie or withhold myself from Him. "Father, please promise me that no matter what I tell you, you will NOT break the sanctity of the confessional. And promise to believe me! I cannot nor would I ever want to lie to God or a man who serves Him."

"My child, I choose to believe in the best of people. I will believe what you say. I let others confide in me and send God's grace to the ones who truly have regret and wish to atone. And breaking the sanctity of the confessional. I am only here to serve as the lords apprentice." He had such an enthusiastic, trusting voice. He was a good man. _Will you carry the burden of his death?_ I shook my thoughts away. It would be as simple as this: Orochimaru would never find out.

"The concept of time has long left me. Maybe it began months ago and maybe weeks. But I do know it all began when my original home, the Village Hidden by Wolves, was attacked and then burned to the ground by a man named Orochimaru..." I calmly spoke the whole story, holding back all my building up emotions. I calmly stayed still and spoke the story. Even through the intimate parts. Even through my demon phase. Even about my current mission. I finished by telling him a vague antecedent of my experience with Croatoan.

I broke down sobbing. "Dear God! Please forgive me! I told you this story only so you would be able to better understand what I'm about to tell you. I feel so lost. I don't understand myself anymore! What's worse, I'm so tired. I keep going, but I'm so tired! I'm starting to give up. Nothing makes sense anymore. I'm always surrounded by people, yet I'm always alone. Dear God, dear God..." I trailed off, no longer able to speak coherently through the sobs.

A speechless priest stayed still on his side, not even breathing. When he exhaled, he spoke in a calm yet horrified voice. "I believe there are no coincidences, accidents, or mistakes in the world. I believe God has a plan for all of us. God put you there to do a job, but you must figure out your purpose yourself... Maybe, if you don't mind me saying so, the hell you're living in, is one you've made yourself. Maybe your trapping your own mind." _Nonexistant. You were given your own hell. _The words echoed back until I pushed them down. "Guilt is a horrible feeling that can devour you. God will forgive you, but you need to forgive yourself." A pause. "Suffer through and the lord will protect you. He will always be with you." The priest finished up, and I left. The confessional, not the church.

I sat down on the pews. My back was hunched over so my head could lean on my clasped hands that rested on the back of the pew in front of me. Somethig broke. All my frustrations, all my anger, all my emotions were finally released in a steady stream of tears. A smile broke out on my face and I prayed. I prayed for everything and nothing. I prayed for everyone and no one. I prayed to thank the lord for letting me find myself. I sat like that for what seemed like hours, feeling better than I have for years.

Noises didn't bother me, but the shrill voice of some preppy girl on a date did. "OI! Isn't it pretty here. Ya know, there's a _lot_ of history in here. You see..." She rattled of meaningless information like when the church was built or who built it and why. Apparently she didn't see me because she accidentally hit me with her handbag. After hearing me groan, she tossed out endless apologies that quickly became annoying. "I'm so sorry! I didn't see you! You should really let people know when you're around!"

"It's okay." I wiped away my tears. "I- Fuiro-san!? Doushite kimi wa koko desu ka. (2)" Yes. The couple on the date were none others but Koto and Fuiro. How lucky. Koto stared at me like I wasn't important, but that was fine. (3) I had moved on and refused to look back. "I am very sorry. You and Koto-sama are obviously on a date, so I should leave you alone." Koto's eyes widened at my nonchalant attitude. I walked past him without faltering once.

Outside it was dark. The starry sky shone bright enough to light the quiet town. The fog was long cleared, but the air I breathed out still looked like clouds. It was fun to try to see pictures in them. I stared intently at what looked like a bunny, until I heard someone hacking up blood. Blood. Suddenly I noticed the all-to-familiar scent of blood that clung to the air. (About 14 hours ago, I regained some of my demon powers back. They aren't all there because Orochimaru still holds my necklace.) I ran to it because it was so familiar. _This scent... I know this scent..._

I didn't need to run far. After only five minutes, I reached the center of a cobblestone road. Right off the bat, I recognized two people: Kimimaro and Croatoan. Kimimaro was three feet away lying in blood, while Croatoan sat against the wall just like in my vision. But it wasn't..."Kiki-chan? You should be here..." He began to stand, but something was off. His splintered bone in his leg, wasn't in his leg. It was in his hand and it looked more like a splintered sword. There were so many others scents of blood that didn't match. Bodies were hidden in the shadows. Croatoan smiled sweetly and said with that same voice that told her he cared for her," Go home, Kiki-chan. I'll join you soon."

"Dear God, Croatoan! What have you done!?"

**Orochimaru's POV:**

She wouldn't shut up. I was praying and praying since I was in a church, but it wasn't working. I was trying not to kill her so I could keep my cover, but I was about to snap. I misread her slutty signals she sent me. Apparently, she doesn't want mindless sex, she wants a _relationship_. Who could have guessed. It would be fun killing her. I came here because bloodied money was dropped into the collection box on the night of each attack. A religious demon? I only knew of one before. It came as a total shock, when I saw Kiki there.

Kiki. When we returned, I would make sure it wouldn't be all roses and candy for her. She will have a real punishment, and will learn her place. She will know she's my property! "Koto-kun! There collections haven't been gathered yet! Money with blood on it is in here!" I moved my thoughts from my rantings on to the yen in between her fingers. I ran up to her to inspect it. The blood was still wet so it was put there recently. Something else in the box caught my eye. I lifted it up and everything clicked into place.

"Fuiro-san, hayaku! I figured it out! We have to get to Kiki before she does something stupid."

**Kiki's POV:**

"Croatoan! Answer me!" I was trying to stay calm. I was trying to understand everything but it was so hard. Croatoan! He- _What do you know about him?_ Nothing. "Croatoan. . . At least answer me this: How much of it was a lie?" A miko. The one hunting him. His lover. Was I a cover up? Was I just being used? Or was it my demon chakra he sensed and was attracted to? Maybe he was just attracted by the power. Honest-to-God, I loved him. I know it. I wasn't just attracted to his power because when I met him, I couldn't sense it.

He smirked at me. "Kiki-chan, go ho-"

"HOW MUCH!?"

He began walking towards me. I was scared of him, but I didn't run. I stayed there and planned to fight him, if it came to that. "Kiki-chan... How could you ask that?" His blood-covered hand caressed my face and pulled my head towards him. "Kiki-chan..." He was kissing me and I was kissing back. His tongue licked at my mouth and I granted him entrance. His second hand landed on my hip. He pulled away and stared at me. For a second I thought he was going to say something, but instead he just leaned back in to lick the blood from my face. "Kiki-chan, I can't stop now. I've tried but I can't. I did something bad. I accepted a deal with a demon. Now I can't stop. Kiki-chan kill me? I'm not human anymore. Kill me."

"I can't! Please, don't make me!"

"Do you know what it feels like to lose control. No. To not have control? I don't want to live like this. You don't know how it hurts. The pain. It's what keeps me killing. Stop the pain. Please sto-" The needle went into his neck. "Kiki-chan please know, I love you." He put something in my hand. "Don't forget me?"

I was crying, because I was so weak. I felt so selfish. I sat down and rested his head in my lap. Tears fell onto his face, washing away the blood. That's how Fuiro and Koto found me. "Congradulations, Orochimaru-sama. Mission complete."

"Orochi-" She was cut off by the snake himself. Her confusion to soon be answered.

"I asked you to catch him alive. I said only as a last resort should you bring him dead."

"He's not dead, he's just sleeping. The sedative will wear off in eight hours." I stared at his inert body. In my head I still heard his frantic pleas for me to kill him. I closed my eyes and stared at the ring. _Bokuno Hatsukoi (4)_ . It was an engraved wedding ring.

**Yeah... Real ansty, preachy, and Sorry. Well one thing I need to mention. Review. **

**(1) - Onward**

**(2) - Why are you here?**

**(3) - This doesn't mean she's now out of love with him. It means she not feeling guilty anymore.**

**(4) - My first love**

**Yeah Kiki's a bit screwed up in this chapter but we still like her, ne? **


	30. Twisted Love

**The poll was taken and TA-DA! It was (imagine drumroll in your heads)... ... ... ... ... ... ... SASUKE! Coming in with five votes. Enjoy! He'll show up eventually... And so far I have two winners for the contest: Nightingale-san and Lilian Masoch**

I stroked Croatoan's hair and watched his chest rise and fall. Would he hate me for screwing up so badly? I kissed his cheek really quickly and heard Orochimaru's jealous snort. "Orochimaru envy is quite the deadly sin. Only it's opposing virtue can cure it. Unfortunately it's kindness, not sadism. Gomenasai." Everyone forgot about Fuiro for a second. The poor girl was hopelessly lost and confused. 

"I don't need patronizing sluts around. Watch what you say or I might need to fix you up like how a fixed up Iro-kun..." He watched my sadness and smiled. "Don't cry! I won't kill you, just crush your throat."

"I don't understand! Koto-kun? Who is Orochimaru? What part of the mission are you talking about? Kiki-ku-" She was cut off because of the punch to her stomach. Falling to her knees, she coughed up saliva and desperately tried to catch her breath. Her head was tilted down while her hands clutched her gut, so she couldn't see the kunai in his hand or the way he licked it, anticipating the coming blood. I hated Fuiro, but death by Orochimaru? Not on my watch.

I tried to be swift, but I tripped over Croatoan's legs. I did manage to grab Orochimaru's feet though. I went through total humiliation because of this, but what's right is right. Orochimaru looked down to me with a raised eyebrow, stopping the attack with seconds to spare. "Don't kill her. Think about it. She doesn't know where any of the bases are. She doesn't know any of your plans. Hell, she barely understands what your name is! She is absolutely harmless!" Fuiro tried to nod her head in agreement, but all it looked like was her trying to lower her head further.

"True, I suppose... But, my dear, She annoys me something terrible and I need something to take out my pent up anger on. Or would you rather it be taken out on you?" He smiled wide enough to show me his fangs. I fisted my hands and let go of his legs. Crawling, I scooted closer to Fuiro and hugged her. Unseen by everyone, chakra flared from my hands healing the dealt damage. In her ear, I quietly whispered, "Nigete (1) . You'll know when the right time is." I heard a small whimper and assumed that meant okay.

I stood from Fuiro's fearful eyes, turning all my attention to the damned hebi akuma (2) with the glint in his eyes. Now or never. I kissed him. Hard. More like I forced him back by having our mouths collide. Fuiro ran like the gates of hell finally opened as Orochimaru tried to push me off him. He wasn't in a playful mood, but I couldn't stop until I knew she was a safe distance away. I pressed my knee against his groin and found out he wasn't aroused, not even in the slightest. The bites he gave me were just to warn me to move my mouth away.

We bothe fell to the ground, but I continued my idea. I hugged him tightly, making sure my hands were clasped tightly around him. He kicked and struggled until he realized by now she would be too hard to catch. He stopped and in a dangerous voice told me to get off of him. I stood and was scared by the look he gave me. His gaze... I felt like I was being devoured. I felt powerless and vulnerable. "Kiki. Go to the inn immediately. Start packing. We are to return to our new base ASAP. We talk more after the move." Like that, both he and Croatoan were gone.

I ran to my room and packed. It didn't take long, especially since fear was my adrenaline. Rei-san wasn't with me. Apparently, Orochimaru got here first and took him away. Kimimaro was here still. I wasn't looking forward to dying or being tortured, but if Croatoan or Rei did instead, I would die of guilt. "Kiki-san, I need you to know that you have greatly angered Orochimaru-sama. As of now, he sees you as disposable trash. Be careful. He will punish you for whatever you've done." I nodded. I didn't need him to remind me.We left the same way we came, except now I could turn back and face the village and regret ever coming.

He walked inside the new base and heard things smashing against the wall and angry yelling. Time to pay my dues. I ran ahead of Kimimaro to the room being dismantled. A stray shard of glass flew out at me, cutting into my leg deeply. Orochimaru didn't notice me and continued his mad ravings. "Fucking incompetence! All of them have it! None could complete the simple task!" I crept up behind him and was rewarded with three broken ribs. That wasn't the end, only the beginning. He grabbed me by the hair and bashed me against the wall seven times. "What are you doing here now!?"

"You seemed... troubled. I came to offer my assistance. I was hoping to relieve some of your tension with some training. How long has it been? A month?" I saw his deadly smirk and chose to willingly ignore it. "Have you perfected that last move?" A curt nod. "Iko." He grabbed my shoulder and led me to the outdoor training ground. It didn't differ much from the last. The type of trees were different, but thats all. "Show me the move. If you mess up, I'll help you."

He... tried. Trying counts, ne? He built up his chakra, started spinning, and released all his energy at random moments. I called for him to stop and when he did, he was madder than before. I ran to him and calmed him down by messing with his pressure points. "Calm down first. The trick is even when your spinning, you hold that last hand sign until the very end." I placed my hands over his to give an example. "Then release. Depending on the chakra used, it could flatten an entire forest. Listen, this attack won't hurt you but it'll... never mind it's not important for someone like you to know."

"It'll what? It'll kill others around me? You're right. That not important enough to bother me with. So what is the minimal amount of chakra I can use so it'll kill an enemy about... ten feet away?"

"Well, you only need to use about one percent. Maybe less. Are you planning to kill me?"

"So what if I am? What would, no what _could_ you do? Accept it. I'm stronger, faster, smarter than you. You are _my_ property you can't do anything."

For once I could surprise him. I raised my arms to form a "T" and smiled. "You're right. I belong to you. I'm your tool. He stared skeptically. "However. I belong to Croatoan." I dropped my arms to my sides. "I am his lover. Get over it." Pain. Blood. Perfection. It happened so fast. In that one moment of defying him, he perfected that move and directed more chakra my way, making the attack only attack me and not the surrounding area. I fell back, bashing against a tree. With the five bleeding scars that almost killed her, the battle began. **(A/N: While reading this battle listen to theVirus of Life by Slipknot...)**

"I hope it didn't hurt you too badly. Odd how in your own move, you didn't know how to figure out how to use it properly. Live and learn, ne? You've said that before, many times." Rushing forward, Orochimaru disappeared from sight. Kiki knew what was happening, but the way her back hit the tree left her temperarly paralyzed. He came beide her and kicked Kiki harder. His foot dug in to the cut running across my chest, forcing dirt and other grime inside it. I noticed his arousal as he manuvered in front of me. Rapid punches were delivered to my face and chest. As he attacked, I tried to block with my limited movements. Every once in a while a caught a punch, but not enough to protect myself. I jumped away. I couldn't feel my legs, but I could move oddly. I ran towards the forest, sensing his released killing intent. "Run, run, run. It just adds to my fun."

I did run. Sudden chips and minor cuts that were appearing in me and the tree let me know the danger of the situation. I quickly made a shadow clone and sent it in the opposite direction. A futile try because a giant black snake already found me and bit into my neck. I used the substitution method to get away. Or at least tried. It latched on before the hand signs were completed. I grabbed on to his neck by the head and ripped it off like a leech. Half of my neck went with it. Blood spurted in many directions, soaking the bark and turning the serene dew on the leave red. It didn't heal because of Kaji's necklace being gone. Holding my neck, I kicked out behind me only to scratch Orochimaru's face as he parried to the right.

"My, my. Why so aggresive?" For a moment, I thought I saw concern on his face as he watched my neck. The feeling left the second he pushed the Kusanagi from his mouth. He charged at full speed, not bothering with the fact that I had dodged, and cut the trunk that was behind me, down. I hid in the foilage, breathing slowly for minimal sound. Crunching leaves and snapping twigs left me in a paranoia that he was approaching, already knowing where I hid, knowing I knew, but still drawing it out. No sound except from my beating heart. It was getting louder and louder. Something grabbed me from. It was a snake that after catching me warped into Orochimaru. A kunai shredded my flesh writing in Kanji : Property of Orochimaru.

I tried to kicked him, elbow him, bite him. He wouldn't get off of me. "I hope you're not pregnant... Just to be sure I should check, ne?" I struggled more madly, like a cornered animal. His lips covered my bleeding neck as his kunai slashed into my stomach. He whipped the blade around like he was looking for something. "Wait, what part is where babies grow? In a hyster-" For the first time in my life, I snapped. I screamed and kicked despite the pain. "_No! No, Orochimaru! Please no!"_ When he loosened his grip on me, I shoved him and began to focus all my chakra to heal my stomach. From my position on the ground, I stared at Orochimaru, knowing why his grip weakened. When I screamed, he came in his pants.

**Kabuto's POV:**

I was a little annoyed at our new guest, but now not only was Orochimaru closer to his goal, but he could relax and calm down. "Where is he? I don't have time to waste."

"Hai. Kochira desu. (3)" We walked to the training grounds and watched quite a display. Orochimaru jumped backwards as snakes were destroyed by black wolves. They advanced towards the real target without orders from the unseen master. Orochimaru punched through one and it exploded into black goo that dragged his fist down into the ground until his whole left arm was away from sight. "I got you now, fucker!" A bloody Kiki leaped from the tree tops and tried to punch Orochimaru's face in. Her killing intent and released chakra level was astounding.

Activating my chakra scalpels, I rushed to my master's side and placing a healing hands on him and a scalpel to Kiki's throat at the split second her feet reached the ground. Orochimaru laughed. "Kabuto-kun, have you really so little faith in me?" The figure on the ground melted into mud." He appeared next to the boy in the doorway. "Come Sasuke-kun, we have much to discuss."

**Well, well... Uh yeah hafta hurry review... umm so of thekey are screwy o sorry. I tried to correct well but i gott go now**

**1 - run away. might be misspelled**

**2 - snake devil**

**3 - Yes. Thisway. Bye. review.**


	31. Adjustments

_A hunter of those wolves, upon the shore_

_Of the fierce stream; and cows them all with dread_

_Their flesh, yet living, sets he up to sale_

_Then, like an aged beast,to slaughter dooms_

_Many of the life he reaves, himself of worth_

_And goodly estimation. Smeared with gore_

_Mark how he issues from the rueful wood;_

_Leaving such havoc, that in a thousand years,_

_It spreads not to prime lustihood again._

I woke up with a cold sweat dripping down my back. I wasn't surprised. Even though Kaji's power was diminishing, my own was strengthening as if for compensation. I looked over to the other side of the bed and found it not only empty, but untouched. Orochimaru may have forced us to share a room and bed, but he wasn't around much. I don't even think that since he came back to here, he sleep in this bed. At night he was in the labs, working on test subjects. At dawn he was training Sasuke or discussing things with Kabuto.

I shifted, making my covers fall away. There are so many ways to be haunted. So many ways to be cursed. Hearing the breath, the rhythm of life. Feeling the pain of others. Living the lives of others. Lately, my powers have had numeral odd effects on me. I am haunted by dreams, horrible dreams that never belonged to me. Ever since Sasuke came, these dreams have become worse. Warped by eyes of red and black. They destroy everything. They create anything.

Worse than the eyes, was the the bloodshed. The screams. The fear. The overwhelming grief. The pure hate and obsession. The vow for revenge. Obviously something really bad must of happened to Sasuke to lead him here, but what I don't know. Uchiha. The name had a familiar ring to it...I would have to look it up later, maybe after I check up on Croatoan and Rei. I paused my thoughts. With Sasuke around, how was Kimimaro holding up? He reacted calmly and accepted it with as much grace as one man could possibly muster. His eyes couldn't betray his emotions.

**Kimimaro's POV:**

I sat quietly on a metal table, watching as Orochimaru worked on Croatoan. He wasn't doing much; just taking blood and other DNA samples. Any hardcore experimentation would be held later. The time was 1:39 AM, but I didn't mind. This early (or late) was the only time I had with Orochimaru now that all his free time was occupied by Sasuke.

Sasuke was my savior's dream. Sasuke was a step forward in his plans. Sasuke was worse trash than the Sound Four members. He had no respect, gratitude, or acknowledgement for Orochimaru. And to add to the confusion, Orochimaru _tolerates it!_ "Orochimaru-sama?"

"Hmm?" Orochimaru didn't bother to look up from the microscope on the counter. He wore a white lab coat and had his hair pulled into a ponytail. Seldom does he put his hair up, but on certain occasions, when he wasn't around others, he would.

"I was wondering, am I still of use to you?" The question nagged at me since my disease started and even after I was cured. All important or slightly difficult missions have passed me by, leaving genin-ranked jobs or missions with escorts. Now with Sasuke around, I feel as though I've been buried or hidden from the surface.

Orochimaru stopped shuffling papers in the spread out files. He straightened his back and craned his neck to stare at my unrevealing face. "Kimimaro-kun, why are you so worried? Don't you know that your importance won't dwindle in my eyes? Did someone tell you otherwise?"

I broke the eye contact we established. "Perhaps... an opinion was stated that led me to a negative conclusion." I didn't wish for Kiki to get in troubleto get in trouble. Already, she seemed to be in hot water. Orochimaru stepped away from his research to caress my face and force our gaze to meet. The world around melted away. "Kiki told me that the second something better comes along I'd become obsolete. I feel as though I've lost my usefulness. Gomenasai."

"Kiki-kun said? We've found the problem, then. She hasn't accepted me like you or any of the others that serve me. Give her time and her tune will change." After a quick chuckle, he frowned. He began talking in an annoyed tone. "You called her Kiki. Why didn't you add a suffix?"

I felt uncomfortable in the situation, but answered because I was still looking into his eyes. "Kiki told me that if people are really close, they could drop it. She told me not to do it in front of you... Gomenasai." She never gave me a reason why. She only said 'if you think Orochimaru-san is listening, keep the suffix.' I hope I didn't do anything too bad.

**Kiki's POV:**

I mindlessly pulled out drawers, sifting through them, searching for false bottoms, a journal, or something that would help me find my necklace. Painful headaches that plagued me have gotten ten times worse. My chakra is becoming unstable. I needed to find it quickly or else... If I couldn't find it, I would have to go to Orochimaru and beg (or persuade).

The door swung open as I was putting a drawer back in, causing me to jump and slam it closed. Angry eyes combined with a stoic face. Orochimaru's soon-to-be vessel, Sasuke, stood in the doorway. "Girl, where is the Snake?" I could tell he wasn't planning to leave anytime soon, especially without an answer. His arms rested by his sides near a kunai pouch waiting for an excuse to attack.

"He's in the labs somewhere. Try lab four." All I got as a response was a 'Hn.' I made a quick decision that if Sasuke was going to be the Queen of Sheba, I could ask for something myself. "Hey! Even though I know you don't care, have you seen a necklace with a rectangular, red stone?" The chances of him actually knowing where it was, was slim. Orochimaru probably wouldn't have told anyone because he knows I have ways of making people talk...

He looked me over without interest. "He wears it around his neck." In a flash he was gone. _Why is he up so late?_ I sighed and put my hands over my face. _It doesn't matter... On his neck, eh? It'll be easy to get it._ Doubling over in pain, I hit my head on the wall in front of me. The taste of blood invaded my mouth. I didn't have much time left, so I had to work fast. The Art of Seduction. I hope Croatoan can learn to forgive me.

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I went to the bedroom with the full intent of punishing Kiki, not for jealousy, but for going behind my back. When I got there, all previous thoughts flew out the window. Kiki was sitting on the bed like she was waiting for me. Her legs were spread a little and her yukata wasn't completely closed. Her nipples were covered though. Damn it. With a raised hand she beckoned me to go to her. I wasn't one to pass opportunities by so I happily obliged.

She spread her legs further before wrapping them around my waist. "Orochimaru..." The suffix was dropped. I could feel that demented smile appear on my face, but was powerless to stop it. Her hand grabbed at my crotch and trailed up to my stomach when I began caressing her leg. "You really are a _bad_ man." As kinky as it was, I wanted her to start calling me daddy... Her hand was gliding over my chest. A finger stopped over my nipple. _"Taking things that don't belong to you!"_ A stinging sensation similiar to rope burn covered the back of my neck, while on my chest, small cuts bled. "Bastard!"

"Make sure to be sure, Kiki." I grabbed her arm and twisted it until her grip loosened on the jewelry. "See?" It fell on the bed, slightly bouncing and cracked. The charm was orange-red and shaped like a parallelogram.

"That's not my necklace." She went into some sort of coughing fit afterwards. Blood dripped from the corner of her mouth as both hands clutched her stomach. "I need it. Please!" _"Fucker!"_ Kaji? I wasn't sure it didn't exactly seem like her. "Where is it? You won't even need to get it! I will!" Her skin started to burn off as an odd chakra burst from her body. She, in a nutshell, was killing herself. "The necklace stabilizes Kaji's and my power. It hurts!" She was transforming. The curse seal was taking over. Her claws were growing long and jagged. Her teeth were fangs. Her irises, her pupils, they were gone, only the whites remained. The chakra swirled like a tornado, leaving burn marks on things around it. _At this rate, she'll collapse or set fire to the building._

I walked slowly to the experiment rooms relishing the sounds of Kiki in such pain. I should have hurried up because it would take a while to actually find the necklace. You see, I never _stole_ it, I found it on the ground during a time when I wanted to kill Kiki. A let my evil intentions out the window and put it safely in the arm of one of my ... helpers ... that assist me with experiments. I put it in a subject from experiment fifty-seven. Unfortunately, that experiment bin is filled with cut up people and the stitches I gave the guy afterwards weren't the only ones given around. I would need to kill off have of them just to save Kiki._ The things I would go through for her._

**Sasuke's POV:**

She lied to me. Whoever the girl in Orochimaru's room was lied to me. I went to lab 4 and ran into Kabuto. "Kabuto, where is Orochimaru? Tell me now." He stayed still, only moving visibly to look at his scalpels in the light. This lab was surprisingly clean for a place reeking of blood. A light on the ceiling flickered bright to dull, bright to dull in the annoying way where quietly you're hoping it'll just go out. "Kabuto."

In mock astonishment, he spun around. "I'm so sorry Sasuke-kun! I didn't hear you. Is there something you need?" He wore a smirk similiar to Orochimaru's and rested one hand on the side of his hip while the other was at his side, holding the scalpel.

"Where is Orochimaru?"

"Why do you need to know?" He checked the clock on the wall. "It's very late. Shouldn't you go to bed?" He turned back to finish his work. "You should go to bed. After all, you'll be up early to train, ne?"

"I need to speak to him now."

Annoyanced flashed across Kabuto's face. "You know you need to learn respect and manners. Such insolence won't be tolerated for long in the Sound. Orochimaru-sama might be in a good mood now, but that can seriously change." Kabuto held up a scalpel and stared in wonder as an idea formed in his eyes.

"Touch me and you will die, but not from my hand." Orochimaru needs me. I'm untouchable. I left without another word. I needed Orochimaru now because that screwy red head might find me soon. I left the village, but I still had fan girls. Most just looked on, but she, this Karin, was a psycho obsessed bitch. She snuck in my room and watched me sleep. I had to wake up to use the bathroom and there she was, staring at me. I thought I heard her say, 'You're five minutes earlier than usual.' I just got here. How could she know!?

**Kiki's POV:**

Orochimaru came back with my necklace, soaked in blood. (both him and the necklace.) I was back to normal by then. Kaji and I pooled our remaining chakra together and concentrated really hard until it stabilized. That would have probably have been the last time we would have been able to do that. It didn't matter now since I had the necklace back. "Thank you." I murmured it, but he heard and then refused to give it back. He stood still, moving his arm up and down to make me jump for it.

"I was wondering, what would you give me for it? I mean, to try and steal it, you risked your body. So what would you do to get it for real?" He watched my face intently, smirking at my anger. And then frowning at me happiness.

"Do you want to know a secret? It's a secret that I would never tell anyone, because, well it's not very proper." His eyes held curiousity now. He stared a little longer than necesary and lowered his arm to give me the necklace. When I touched it, it glowed a soft red. I got behing Orochimaru and whispered in his ear, "Croatoan's bigger than you." I ran like hell, not bothering to see the look on his face.

In front of me was a very pissed off Sasuke kicking some servant boy in the gut."Hey Sasuke-san! He's in his room now!" Sasuke turned to me and walked to Orochimaru's room, sharingan flaring. I ran to the kid. "Are you okay?" He gave a quick nod. He flinched when I extended my hand to him, but eventually took it. "What's your name?"

"Dark." Dark was a thirteen year-old boy with ice blue eyes covered by long, black bangs. He was dressed in all black, from head to toe. _I wouldn't be surprised if his favorite color is black._ Next to him was a spilled meal of dangos and cokehey. "Gomenasai for causing you trouble. Thank you for helping me."

"Your welcome. Don't even mention it. It wasn't any trouble. And don't mind Sasuke-san. He's screwed up." We both chuckled a little bit. This kid was so nice and innocent. It was hard to believe he was from Sound Village. Then again, people are taken against their will and forced to serve Orochimaru (or are tricked), so it's not their fault.

"Where are you headed, senpai?" Senpai? Why would he call me- Oh. I forgot to tell him my name. That was rude of me. " 'Cause I was wondering, can I come along? You're the first nice person I've met for a while! It would be easier to hang around you." How sweet! I stared at the boy with a warm smile on my face. This kid in a way reminded me of Iro-kun.

"Well, first off, don't call me senpai. My name is Kiki. You don't need to say -san or -sama, so don't bother. I'm going to the lab's holding cell. I'm looking for a friend. You can come along if you want." I started walking and he followed like a duck. "Can I call you Dark-chan?" He smiled and nodded. "Good."

We only walked a little bit before Dark tugged on my hand. "Go down this way. I know a shortcut." The hall he was dragging me down was more narrow, longer, and darker than the other hallways. Every few feet, half-melted candles dimly lit the rest of the way. We finally came to a four-way crossroad, where only one candle was alive on the north wall. Dark looked back and forth and every which way before he was kicked onto the the last candle. The lights were only temperarily out. The shadows receded as the candle's flame came back. Dark was on the floor, clutching his side in pain. I could tell he fractured his hip.

Orochimaru sighed and looked at me. "Was there something you needed?" He grabbed my arm and squeezed it. He stared impassively and me before his eyes drifted to Dark. "Well, Dark-kun? Are you going to answer? I know I taught you how to diffirenciate between rhetorical questions."

I wriggled my arm out of his grasp, though it wasn't exactly a feat with Orochimaru so distracted with Dark. I touched the spot where he held it and found it wasn't bruised or sore at all. _ That's new. Is he not mad? _"Orochimaru-sama! You don't need to be so, so violent with him. He's only a kid! Besides he was just-"

"Going to kill you." Orochimaru finished my sentence and then brought his eyes to meet mine, showing the seriousness in them.

"NO! He was-"

"Going to kill you." Orochimaru again insisted without interest in his voice. "Never judge a book by his cover. You of all people should know that. Dark-kun is one of my stronger, more experienced ninja. He travels to different villages and scopes them out for me. Usually he carries two swords on his back, but he just got from a mission. He's an expert with wind jutsus, so he barely needs them anyway. Even before I found him, he was a mercenary. A cheap one at that. You shouldn't be so trusting, even to the children." He grabbed my arm and led me away. "Dark-kun, I expect a report. Please don't keep me waiting.

I walked alongside him in silence, until he broke it with his casual conversation. "Rei-kun is dead. A test subject of mine attacked and killed him about three hours ago. Kabuto took the body so you won't be able to cremate or bury it. And we might have to kill Croatoan. He's not a very cooperative fellow."

I almost broke down and punched him. "What do you mean? Why? How? And you can't kill Croatoan after I brought him in alive! You bastard! You were planning this from the start, weren't you!" He was talking as though it wasn't important as if it was an everyday thing that didn't matter! I stopped. "I bet you did it! You killed Rei-kun, didn't you! And I bet you already killed Croatoan!" It wasn't fair. Why does everything bad happen to me? "Why-"

He dragged me along by forcefully grabbed my shoulder. "No I didn't kill him. Either of them. A subject escaped. Before I could catch him, Rei-kun came in. The man killed him and fled. I caught him again so don't worry. Croatoan is atacking anyone who come near him, so he's going to be deemed useless soon. I'm taking you to go talk to him. I know you don't want your ... dead." An akward silence overtook us. There was something Orochimaru wasn't telling me. _That's why he's acting so calm and smug._

We stopped in front of the lab, neither of us noticing my tears. I took a deep breath and prepared myself for the worst as I walked in.

**Cliffie! Umm. Early update! Smile! This chapter is about five or six pages long. rejoice my loyal readers.**

**Congradulations to Nightingale-san! All owning rights of Dark go to her. She won the contest and there's her character. He'll show up every once in a while. And as for Rei, well more info on him will be given on the next chapter. Review. I live for them. **

**And Sapphire-Jewels favorited my story.**

**I know your name so ha! you hafta leave a review! And thank you all my other reviewers! I think I got a new one a little while ago... so thank you all!**


	32. A Day of Absolute Random Nonsense

A stared at Croatoan in disbelief. This made no sense at all. I turned to gape at Orochimaru, who just leaned against the wall in an uncaring manner, inspecting his nails. "What-? How-? Why-? Is there any particular reason why he's drunk!?" Yes. Croatoan was drunk. As was Jinta. As was Takeda. They were all drunk together in the holding cell doing the Macarena. (A/n: Go to youtube and look it up if you have no idea what the Macarena is.) " Jinta was wearing a top hat and a red bow with a white collar. Croatoan was holding on to the bottle of burban. Takeda was singing the macarena while laughing. At me. At them. At everything. I stared at Orochimaru once again noticing his sneer and annoyment at them. "Did you-? How-? I thought this was a a a secure place were liquor _wasn't be given to people! _"

"I didn't do this, but I hope you enjoy your hopeless lover. He's a foolish idiot." I admit he looked ... odd while putting his hands on his hips and shaking them. He saw me and beganing waving furiously with one hand. This didn't stop his dancing. And well, Jinta was drinking from the bottle again.

"Com jain meesh! Kiki-chaaan! Com onss! Dur tha dansh wif mee. Takeda-san did!" _THE BASTARD! _Takeda did this. He probably thought it would be funny to to AHHH! I don't even know! I walked closer to him and through the bars he grabbed me and started touching me. Everywhere. He tried to undress me. I wouldn't let him. He looked at Orochimaru with nothing but innocence gleaming in his eyes. "Wanna dur a freesome wif ush?" I turned my head to tell Orochimaru not to bother with him because it wasn't his fault, but he acted as though he was thinking about it.

"Offers off the table, so back off!" Croatoan lifted up my shirt to expose my boobs. I had to do what I had to do; my elbow, his face. I took a black senban fron my hair (I hid them there because they blended so well.) and picked the lock with extreme ease. "Croatoan, we need to discuss something important." He fell to his knees and began rubbing his head against my thigh. I _could_ justify the upcoming bloodbath, but then Orochimaru might be proud of me... "Croatoan do you know what happened to Rei-san? Croatoan?"

Bright eyes looked up at me. "Didn't Ithat im for snake likey you!" I shook his shoulders wildly. " Wat! I sid the snakey likes yu so hekill the guy!" He stared. "Ur look diffrannt! Ur you okays?" He was worried, but I didn't care. He said Orochimaru killed him! The lying bastard! Why!? I know he didn't like him. So what? He's an antisocial fucker. Rei di-

"I hope you are not actually listening to the ravings of a drunken demon? Foolish..." He ran his fingers through his hair, laughing wildly. "Besides, let's say you do believe him. Why? Because you don't like me? That's right! He _is _your most trusted lover, after all! But guess what! Guess who the escaped and killed him. Go on and guess! Croatoan! Of course he blamed me. So naive... Sometimes I wonder why-" His voiced trailed off or I let my mind wander.

"Snakey...ur a gurl gaishaaa, ne? Cun yo do a fn dance?" He handed me two giant black fans. "Givem to snaky."

"Where'd you even get these?"I looked up. "Authoring bitch! Whaat? You under the influence or something." Silence. "Hey! I'm talking to you!" Silence. "Answer me!"

"Shut up dumbass and follow the storyline I set down! I'm the author and could totally mess you up in there."

"Fine bitch. Where was I?"

"Croatoan."

"Oh, yeah." I realized in a second what was wrong. Something that may or may not incriminate Croatoan. "Croatoan!" I hunched down to level with his face. "Croatoan! Can you actually _see_ Takeda-san or do you just hear him?" He made soft mumbles as his eyes drooped closed. His head bobbed up and down. "Hey wake up!"

Psychos came running in, suddenly, being well... crazy. It was none other than Sasuke and some red head. " Get away from me before I kill someone. I came here for power not to be molested in my sleep! Karin, I'm warning you!"

"No! Wait Sasuke, I was just taking some meaurements! Ask Orochimaru-sama! He told me to! I swear it!" Karin gave Orochimaru a pleading stare, begging him to back her up.

"You! You fuckin' snake! You told her to do that!" Sasuke faced Orochimaru glaring with wild eyes. His chakra flared at a high, dangerously crushing level. His chakra was so powerful, which was unusual for someone his age. His body was in great fitness. It was no wonder why Orochimaru chose his body.

"Yes, in the morning when you were awake. She was to write down your height, weight, and width. Shewas to give you a normal check-up. Karin-chan... What exactly were you measuring?" All eyes were on her.

"Stuff. You know... We are all scientific professionals here. I was just being extra, _EXTRA_ thorough." Karin began fidgeting and messing with her hair. The nervous smile on her face was reduced to her showing teeth.

"Sasuke, from now on you will report with Kabuto-kun for any medical exams or health related issues. Understood?"

"Hn." Sasuke stared with disgust over at a crying Karin

"Chald molester! I just figured it out" Croatoan's sleepy voice called out to me, "He obviously is a chald rapist! 'Cause hez all obsassed wif youf and stuff! And haf youz sheen one olds guy her? NO! And, and he always wanz to take a youngur body right? What better way to than-" Sasuke and Karin moved to their left, away from Orochimaru.

"Croatoan! How wonderful to see you awake and still not sober." I said this out loud with hopes of relieving the tension in the atmosphere. Yeah, didn't help. I began whispering to Croatoan. "Can you see Takeda-san or not?" _Please sat no! _He took a breath and tried to process the question. He looked like he might hurt himself. "The demon with black hair, creepy eyes, doesn't resemble a snake? Any of this getting through?"

"YESHH! I CAN SEE THE DEMON GUY! YOU CAN SHEE 'IM TOO!?" He screamed this at the top of his lungs and made everyone turn to stare with confusion. "DEMON MAN! WHY CANS THE SEXY LADY SEE YA!?" My hand went over his mouth. I laughed nervously. "Heh, heh... My oh my. He really is wasted, isn't he? Well, just don't bother with him until he's sober, okay? As a matter of a fact, we should all leave him alone for a while." Nobody was buying it. I needed a patsy to lure everyone's attention away... "KARIN-SAN! Whatcha doin'?"

Poor Karin was ... had her head between Sasuke's legs and her hands were up and Sasuke was wearing a simple yukata. "Well... I was... Orochimaru-sama? I... measurements?" Sasuke kicked her from under him. "Oww!"

"Karin leave immediately. You're a hinderance. And leave Sasuke-kun alone." Karin huffed, but ran out, hoping Sasuke liked her. "Now Kiki-kun, how about we discuss the odd behavior of your lover." The spark of jealousy lit up his eyes. He crossed his arms across his chest and leaned against the wall. "What demon is he talking about?''

I didn't understand exactly ... If I... Why did it feel like I would betray Croatoan by talking about him. I couldn't talk to Orochimaru without talking to Croatoan. It was a bad idea, especially since Orochimaru has the ability to warp everything he says. "First you tell me the truth. Was Croatoan the prisoner?"

"Yesss." The signature smirk was planted on his face. My sorrows. My pain. I was fueling his joy. It hurt to know, no, to think that Croatoan may have hurt me, whether intentional or not.

"I have no idea what Croatoan is talking about." I watched Croatoan for a long time before choosing to kiss him on the lips. I whispered in his ear," I forgive you. I'm sure Rei-san does, too." I hugged Croatoan tightly. What would make him act out? He knew Rei. He probably wouldn't have attacked him and he probably wouldn't have been able to stand up to Orochimaru; he wasn't exactly a high class ninja. "Croatoan... What really happened?" Deep down I couldn't deny the fact that Croatoan _could _kill Rei. He made a deal with a demon. He's capable of anything.

"Orochimaru-san? Can I make a little request? Please? We can resume your training tomorrow." I heard the desperation in my own voice, so there was no doubt he heard it.

"It depends. What do you want? I'm not letting my speciman go and Kabuto will keep the body of Rei-kun." I flexed my hands from a fist at the mention of Rei. He shouldn't have died... There was no helping it now. Kabuto might... if I ask him. Maybe I can talk to him and trick him into giving me Rei's body.

"Iz he a necrofiliac toe?" I put duck tape on his mouth. God! He was ruining the one serious scene this chapter.

"No. I wanted to spend the night with Croatoan. Please?" I added the please because I saw his eyes widen and his body go rigid. "I promise I won't have sex with him. I promise not to fondle or kiss or hug him. I just want to stay by his side for a while." He was trying to come up with an excuse, any reason as to why I shouldn't. He was failing.

"Just let her. Both of us are going to train in the morning. Neither of us need to be tired." We both jumped at the sound of Sasuke speaking up. After all the drama unfolded, we forgot he was still here. "So shut up the both of you, and let's go." Orochimaru was amused at Sasuke's behavior. He left silently, but not before flashing me one last warning glance.

"Wuz that boi woring a wig or ix he jus word?" He ate through the tape. Damn it all.

Down to the very last milisecond, when he was gone, I kissed the top of Croatoan's head. I hugged him close and ruffled his hair._ Now all I have to do is wait for him to wake up, fondle him, have five hours worth of sex, then I'd really be sticking to the man! BWAHAHA!! _I looked around and sighed. _Kami. I'm going crazy._ I hugged him again and sneezed. He smelled like blood.

**Yes. This is a screwed up, weirdo chapter. I've been reading many random things lately. You don't need to review on this chapter...**


	33. Sharing Disappointment

_Cold. Consuming. There is no escaping it..._

I didn't mean to wake and jump up so abruptly, but I did. I couldn't remember what my dream was about and it bothered me to no end. Not the fact that I couldn't remeber or that it startled me so, but because I felt as though the dream had already taken place. I shivered as a sudden cold wrapped around my body. Clutching my arms, I stared over at Croatoan. He was awake and pretending to be asleep. "Croatoan? Please wake up. We need to talk. Please."

"Hmmm? What about?" A pause. Understanding was setting in, conquering his hangover and desire to lay back down to sleep. "This is about Rei-kun, ne? Orochimaru-san told you I did it?" Silence. "Kiki-san, you need to comprehend the fact that I'm not exactly human. I- I loose control so easily. I can't hold back." Orochimaru was telling the truth. He- The bastard! How? Why? I'm mad at _Orochimaru!?_ That made no sense! "Oi, Kiki-chan?" I heard the worry laced in his voice, but I needed to get away.

"Croatoan? I need to go. I'm sorry. I'll be back to visit you in a little bit, okay?" I wasn't sure if that was the truth or not. I needed air. Maybe I could go for a walk around the outside of sound. I don't think Orochimaru would object to that. Unless he thought I would try to escape or send for help. That would make him paranoid. (What? Am I going to send a bottle with an SOS down the nearby stream?) "Umm... Jaa ne." I scrambled to my feet or made an attempt.

He lunged forward and made a grab at me, catching my right arm. "Chotto matte, Kiki-chan. About Takeda-san..." I ceased my actions and thoughts telling me to struggle. "Kiki-chan I _can _see, hear, and talk to Takeda. He always usually hangs around for however long, and whenever because he's the demon I made the deal with. He mostly just checks up on me. Before I took out the hearts of my victims and fed them to him. My part of the deal was I feed him and make him stronger. I think since the bodies were so mutilated, they never really noticed."

I took back my spot next to Croatoan. I pushed at his shoulder until he fell into my lap. I began to pet his hair and stare at him. I didn't know what to say. I believed Croatoan of course. Takeda always said that he needed more power, so I don't see why he wouldn't stoop this low. "I. Croatoan? I forgive you. I know it wasn't your fault. I understand you can't help it, but you need to understand, this is a lot for me to take in. I just need some time, okay?" He nodded his head.

"Goo-" He propped himself up on his elbows and kissed me. He pulled back and looked me in the eyes. "Thank you..." He kissed me again. He repositioned his body so now he was sitting on my lap. He gave me another kiss and now with tongue. His hands went to cup my face as mine held on to his back. His shirt gone. I noticed his pants were kinda baggy. I could see the hem of his green boxers at his waist. As he was working on my bra, I pulled down his pants as much as I could. (Down to right above his knee.) He had an erection and now his frantic hands were so uptight, the bra was winning.

I put a had around the member in front of me and gave a few slow tugs. He breath hitched a little, but I didn't want that reaction. I tightened my grip and began a continuous, fast rhythm. "OHH! GOD!! KIKI!!" This of course was the exact time when the door swung open to reveal Dark with a tray of food. "I'll be back in five minutes, and Orochimaru-sama will be here in seven. Ganbatte. I hope you can explain this." He left with a smile. Seven minutes that was fine! That gave us enough time to- After the seven_ seconds_ past, Orochimaru came in and saw a incriminating sight. Me. Croatoan. Clothes missing.

"Kiki. Up. NOW. Go to our room." He stared at me, but I couldn't see his eyes. Somehow they were hidden even though his hair wasn't blocking them. Both me and Croatoan stood. He fixed his clothes and I hugged him carefully. I faced Orochimaru again, preparing for my death sentence. "No." All hell broke loose. Orochimaru lost his temper in simpler terms. But either way, I was pushed into the wall and he attacked Croatoan.

"She was MINE! Mine! You fuck!" Croatoan couldn't defend himself. Punches. Kicks. Head bashes. Croatoan would be lucky to survive this. He was hacking up blood now. And red. I saw the red. I forced Orochimaru into the wall and poofed us out of the room into ours. He hit me in the face. "Let go of me this instance!" I didn't. Rather I decided to experiment with a different approach. I kissed him. A log, deep, passionate kiss. He responded by pushing me to the ground and wiping the kiss from my face. "Whore!"

I laughed and laughed. "So... It's exactly what I thought. You can't stand my touch anymore, yet you refuse to let anyone else enjoy it. It repulses you knowing I've been defiled by another, doesn't it?" I knew his anger was rising. And only an idiot would push their luck here.

"Do you want to know the _real _Croatoan? Honestly, he's practically a Kagame!1 He's fucked every single women he's met. Not to mention he's a distraction from your work." Before I could ask how the hell he interfered with anything, he answered. "That night you gave him your virginity, I came pounding on the door, but you didn't answer." I blushed and tried to speak again with no avail. "Kimimaro was coughing up blood again-"

"Oh my God! Is he okay? H-" He slapped across the face splitting my dry lip.

"Don't interrupt me when I'm talking. Or ever. I'll give you permission for when you can speak. Understand?" I nodded. I was only being obediant to see what happened to Kimimaro. "Good. Now where was I?" He paused to recollect his thoughts. "Oh yes. Kimimaro was coughing up blood again and I didn't know what to do. I was so _worried_ that my little flower was wilting away again. Luckily it wasn't the case. Eventually, he came to me during my furious poundings and told me that he hacked up a fish bone stuck in his throat."

"Thank God. At lea-" His hand enclosed around my neck. I extended my claws and cut into his arm. He didn't flinch. He pressed me up against the wall. "What did I say about talking? Don't. At least not without my permission. I thought you understood." I kicked him in the chest and he fell over.

"What's the BIG deal!? At least he was fine. At least nothing happened. Why are you so pissed? I told you before I don't belong to you!" I rubbed at my neck, willing my pain away.

"All that time, I was outside listening to you and him. Outside the room, the noises so loud, putting the most vivid images into my mind. I found you first. You're mine." He forced his lips on mine. Her pressed himself onto me so hard and roughly. He forced my shirt off. I tried to hit him but he grabbed both wrists. He moved to attack her neck. He bit down and lapped up her blood like a vampire.

Suddenly Orochimaru tossed her on the bed and with wire tied Kiki down. She kicked wildly, but he was able to get her pants and panties off. He stared at her naked form with an impassive glare. He soon stripped down and got on top of her. His tongue roamed her upper body. When he called it back into his mouth, he began to suck on her breasts. Then he stopped and spread Kiki's legs wide open. "Please Orochimaru. I may belong to you, but please don't do this to me." Welling tears ran down her face.

He stared at her. With the Kusanagi, he cut the wires and then beat her. A slap across the face. He grabbed her by the hair and ramming her consecutively against the wall. He kicked her in the stomach twice, threw her in the general direction of her clothes, and then went to attack the walls. Kicking and pounding. The walls groaned and cracked as his fury was unleashed.

I was stunned. He was? I wiped my tears away and hugged him from behind. "STOP! JESUS, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!? YOU'RE A FREAKIN' BABY!" He punched me in the face, all composure regained. I laughed. "Glad you're back to your old self! Tomorrow I'm gonna teach you the..." Crap... What was it called? "The... Dance of the Dead (2)"

"And tomorrow you'll be punished for today. Rest easy." Smug bastard. "And put some clothes on. People will confuse you for a whore."

**Sorry. Bad Chapter. I know. I am hurrying. Ummm...**

**1. Kageme - Male prostitute**

**2. Sorry! borrowed from Inuyasha because I forgot the one I planned out. Review! Dark belongs to... Nightengale-san.**


	34. Bittersweet Thoughts

_It hurt so badly. It was almost time. She could feel it. The pressure in her stomach grew and grew. The cell she was kept in had so many others in it, yet no one to help or consider her. Coughing fits because of moist, dark room (if you could call it that), plagued her. A surge of pain knifing through her stomach. She leaned against the wall, her arm grasping the nearby corner, to stop her staggering. The brick behind her soiled with moss and fungus. A clear liquid ran down the sides of her legs as she cried out in agony, desperately clutching her stomach. Her water broke. The baby was on the way and it was too late to stop it._

_._

Kiki stared forward as she walked towards Croatoan's cage. Though, in all honesty, she had no real reason to go back, she decided to learn more about the wedding/engagement ring thing he gave her. Don't get her wrong; Kiki wasn't planning to look a gift horse in the mouth, but a ring like that, so suddenly? It seemed like such a cheesy, rushed ending in some sort of romance movie! What answers could she possibly get? Who knows... But said man (or demon. Does it really matter? He has thoughts and feelings, so he's more human then some) on the spotlight wouldn't say something stupid like, I got it for another girl, but she left me. Right?

Staring at the ground, I noticed how the patterns on the floor were. Every five bricks, one slab of marble. On the ceiling there was no pattern, just a random stack of bricks fitted together. The walls had no real patterns either. I thought hard about this mundane place. What if someone had gotten lost in this endless labyrinth? Are they still lost? Will I find there bodies? I shivered at the thought. I made a turn right at the fork in the road. I stared down. _One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Ceramic._ I made a turn and found a new kind of stone to replace the marble. A think a found my pattern and means of finding my way around.

I took some extra time for detours to scope out the rest of the base and memorize the routes. Every new corridor had a new stone after every fifth brick. Except at the entrance. It was all brick. Satisfied that I earned my gold star for the day, I skipped down to Croatoan's. I made it there and he was waiting for me. "I heard scampering footsteps, so I assumed it was you. Does this mean we're gonna cut off on the sex?" He stared hopefully at me, putting on puppy dog eyes. I smiled warmly and held out my arms in a welcoming embrace. He ran to me with a bleeding nose. Right before he reached me, I punched him down into the ground.

"Get off the perverted thoughts. And sadly yes. It would probably be safer seeing how we have no privacy whatsoever." Noticing my bare fingers, I stuffed my hands down into my pocket, scavangering for the ring. It was gone. I thought of Orochimaru screwingaround with my clothes. _He stole it! _"Anoo... Well I was wondering about that ring you gave me before I ruined your screwed up life. I don't have it with me, but... What's it's story? Naturally I'm just curious." I acted all suspicious and defensive ( I can tell), but I have no clue as to why. I turned my head away so he wouldn't see the blush on my face. I wasn't really sure if I wanted to know or not.

Croatoan stared at me, confused. "Story? You mean like how I got it?" I nodded weekly. "Well, it belonged to my Okaasan. My mom's first boyfriend gave it to her. She was so in love. _Bokuno Hatsukoi._ That's what's written on it, ne? Well... My mom found out how the first boyfriend was just sweet talking her so they could get married. You see the guy was deep in debt. He figured the only way to fix the gambling problem was to marry a rich gal. He almost did, but when Ma figured out the bastard, she took the ring and ran like hell. She told me to give this ring to the first woman I fell in love with. She also said, 'If you go an' break 'er heart, she might have enough sense to run like hell with it too."

I listened to the story with a feeling of disappointment. I felt left down in a way. I suppose it's better than what I thought the possibility was. But... I suppose I was hoping for a romantic, epic story... Hey, I'm a girl so I have idealities! "Oh... That's an interesting story... Thank you for telling it to me. I'm glad that's settled now... I have to get going. Jinta-kun is gonna be mad that I'm late with my therapy session with him. Don't ask. All I'll tell you is before I got into the room, Jinta-kun found me and scheduled manditory therapy sessions for me every night."

"Jinta-kun... Jinta-kun!? Chotto Matte! Isn't Jinta-kun your pet fox, dog, or cat thingy-magigy? Why is- No! How can your pet be your psychologist? It makes no sense!" Croatoan sent me an accusing glare. A therapist pet? Yes, a lame, last second thought up excuse. Sadly, this excuse wasn't made up. Jinta was a weird messed up pet. I was pressure into a session with him and if I didn't go he threatened to tell Orochimaru about a little incident involving a beaker or two... or eight.

_It was not only late, but pitch black. The light was broken and no candle burned on the wicks. To make a bad situation worse, I wasn't wearing any shoes. Why? I have no clue. I snuck down into the lab looking for Rei's body. I suppose I was just rushing. I had such high hopes about finding him..._

_I put my arms out in front of me and slowly moved them to and fro. I pressed my foot against something not quite squishy and scaley. I jumped back, all my limbs flailing. The snake straightened itself out (happily showing me it was taller then me), it's tongue flickering out from it's (what looked like) closed mouth. I screamed. One arm hit and shattered an empty beaker next to me. I heard and saw it break, which gave me a brilliant idea. (It was a spur of the moment thing. Not my best plan)_

_I picked up one beaker at a time a chuched it as hard and fast as I could in it's general direction... (I'm pretty sure most of them hit him) Three of the beakers were empty like the one I broke except for they weren't washed out very well. The other five had chemicals of various colors in them. (I didn't have time to admire the pretty colors so I can't give any details) The snake was already hissing in pain and about to lauch itself at me, so I threw the eighth beaker directly at it's face. It hissed as it's face collided with the floor. The chemicals around it mixed and TA-DA the whole lab had an out of control fire raging on. I ran like hell._

"Gomenasai! I know right now it looks like I'm trying to stay away from you or something but I got to go." Reminiscing about my flaws made me anxious. "How about this, let me go now without making a scene and I won't ask about how many women you slept with before me. Hayaku! Jinta cancelled an appointment with Kimimaro and some guy named Nato-san. And he only temperarily rented out that room." When I mentioned the women, his face went pale.

"Fine. You can go. But only because I think I don't to mess with a messed up in the head Kiki. Visit me soon." I nodded and dived out the door. Jinta said he was going to wait in Lab B2 and to meet him there within twenty minutes. I didn't have my watch on so I wasn't sure if I was late or not. I took a deep breath and entered. I wasn't too sure about this. What were we supposed to talk about? I had a limited mind right now meaning I was giving a limited amount of answers.

**(A/N: For This next part, the translations will be given to those not fluent in gibberish)**

"Auuw eeu oohea ahh." _'Glad you're here. Please lay down on the sofa.'_ I understood Jinta perfectly clear for some reason... The office he was using was really an examining room. The 'sofa' was actually an examination table and Jinta (wearing professional-looking glasses) was sitting on a mere stool. I sat down and only after recieving the stern look, layed down. "Eaahh Ouuwwahh?" _'Where should we begin?'_ I stared. "Eyyuae yeeaw Ogrinaaayuu?" _'How about with Orochimaru?'_

"Oh, please! What's there to talk about? Orochimaru is a creepy, sadistic freak of nature. There's nothing else to it than that. Oh, except he gradually got that way." Jinta moved his paw around on a notebook like he was, well... taking notes. I tried to look at what was being written, but he stepped on the paper and growled. "Okay! I get it! No peeking. I understand. I don't care either way." It was eating me up alive inside.

"Hooaww eawwaoh? Weeeaahhh Awwww Auuuughwa. Ogrinaaayuu aww." '_Why were you so quick to jump into bed with Croatoan? You knew Orochimaru much longer and had a crush on him, but you never slept with him. _That was a good question. I never really thought about it or noticed much. So why? Why? Why...

"Probably because I didn't want to fall in love with him. Who the hell falls in love with some sort of sadistic snake demon!? He's not human at all, you know. Croatoan was, well, the exact opposite of Orochimaru! He's kind, considerate, not-creepy-sexy, smart, and the list can go on forever. Why shouldn't I be in love with Croatoan?" I wore a triumphant smirk on my face. In a court of law, I would see that as a flawless rebuttal.

"Awww. Euuaww." _'That wasn't the question.' _Damn him. "Awwwww AAAAwwwww Aeeeaauww." _'Is it possible that, you're forcing yourself to fall in love with Croatoan?' _I sat up. I stared at Jinta a while, hoping to dissect his brain, realize his logic. I couldn't see where he was getting at.

"Doyu koto de?" (1) I stood up, realizing this would lead somewhere that I wouldn't like. I tried to leave, but Jinta transformed into his demon form. An elegant white fox with nine tails and a mane of red flames. **(A/N: Umm. Think of Nine tails from pokemon. I tried to think up my own, but with my cousin watching pokemon, I got the image stuck there)** He was quick and got to the door before me. He bared his teeth and pushed me back onto the table.

A growling voice that could barely be made out, gave me the surprise of the year. _"I'm trying to help you. You're scared. Why? You can't figure it out, can you? You're scared of 'Birds of a feather.' _I never knew Jinta could talk, in demon or animal form. I never knew he knew so well...

"No, stop it!" I covered my ears in hopes of muffling the nonsense from poisoning my mind. _If it's such nonsense, why are you so bothered? _Why? Why? Why! Why why? That damned word! Why? Why can't things be left alone? Why do things need to be torn down? The safe walls you've strived so hard to build up, shattered so slowly. To the point where you know it will fall but can't save it. It can't happen! But it was. The words could not be drowned out.

_"You're scared that why you're attracted to him, is because of something you have denied for so long. That you've tried to forget. You're scared that you might be evil. You're scared of yourself." _And there it was. The truth. The unspoken truth that was forbidden to be spoken, was now out in the open. Pandora's box had just opened and now it couldn't be closed.

.

I walked away from everything, my soul waging war against itself. Evil. I may not seem evil, but evil can come in so many forms. All the times I've killed, tortured, and enjoyed it, was it just Kaji doing it? Kaji and I are one. Birds of a feather flock together. Were Orochimaru and I birds of a feather? Evil is attracted to evil one would suppose from that idiom. Orochimaru had been attracted to the Akatsuki. Kabuto to Orochimaru. The snakes to Orochimaru. Me to Orochimaru. My husband to me. Kaito to me. Thy, at the end, seemed like real douchebags.

My thoughts roamed over to my husband. I should look for him. I don't love him, but being engaged to him left an odd bond that I can't ever explain. I wonder what he's been through. A flashing memory of when I first found him here darkened my mood further.

_Smeared with blood, a restrained man lay on a table, needles beside him in a tray. Large gashes were covering his body (where his chakra points were, I noted), and left unattended he could die._ _I stared at his eyes. They were looking at me but they weren't seeing me._

I grabbed my forehead and cleansed my mind of all thoughts. (It wasn't as easy a task as one might think.) I had to face my fears and overcome them eventually, but now, I decided because of my weaknesses showing, was not the time nor place. Where was this place? I had wandered around without glancing at any of my surroundings, so I wasn't quite sure. It looked like the dungeons he keeps prisoners in, but I could have sworn I walked in the opposite direction of them. _Maybe he has more than one? It's possible._ I took a look around, noting the striking similarities to the other dungeon. I started thinking about Kurogane. Since he was gone, I had no best friend. He was the friend who annoys the crap outa you and was so perverted you can't believe he was straight, but missed him when he was gone. I sighed, turned to leave and then I saw her.

The woman looked like she was in pain. One hand was clutching the wall she leaned against, the other, her swollen stomach. Her dress that she wore was soaked. It wasn't urine, so it had to be... As soon as reality slapped Kiki in the face, she rushed over to the side of the woman in labor.

"Okay, first things first, ummm lay down." Kiki had been in a room seeing first-hand the wonderful miracle of child birth. Seeing. Honestly she never really helped except when she was told to get warm towels. Taking a look around, Kiki realized this wasn't a very convienent place to have a baby. _What part of Otogakure is?_ "Okay, have you ever been pregnant before?" Irrational shaking wasn't a good communication for me, but I took it as a no.

It almost felt as though God had answered my prayers. A lackey of Orochimaru patrolling the area, I'm guessing, walked by and saw us. Well, actually he saw me with my hands between a woman's legs. He sat down crisscross to watch the show. Thats when I noticed him. "Hey, you! Over on the ground!"

The man was coughed and was currently sneezing. As I called to him, he not only wiped his nose on his sleeve, but smirked. "What? Don't mind me. Just go back to what you were doing." He put his elbow on his knee and propped his face up with his hands.

"She's in labor! Go gt a doctor! Any doctor!" The man looked surprised. He hopped to his feet and started running. _Good. . . CRAP! _"NO!!" The man stopped and turned towards me. "Don't get Kabuto-san or any of his subordinates." He nodded and began to run again. _Good. . . CRAP! _"WAIT!" He stopped again. "Don't or try not to tell Orochimaru about this!" He waved and started his run again. _Good. . ._ Well, it didn't matter if I forgot something, the guy was to far away to hear, or could get away with pretending to not hear.

The womaned screamed, causing my attention to turn to her again. I pulled her panties off. She was dilated. . . a little. . . I think. . ."M'am, gomenasai! I have no idea how to help you! Just bare the pain for a while! Tell my about yourself. What's your name? How old are are you. Who's the father? What do you like?" The woman's eyes held only pain and scars from long-term suffering. I wasn't sure if I was getting through to her.

"Aaa-kaa-naaaOH GOD!!... It hurts! Do soOOmetThinMNgnnnN!" Her words started coming out scraggled and eventually turned completely to screams.

I moved my hands, forming meaningless gestures and frantic waves. I was about to go into some sort of panic attack. The only reason I didn't was because I heard the echoing footsteps running closer and closer. _Good. . .CRAP! _The bastard nin screwed me over big time! The calvary he brought was consisting of Orochimaru, Kabuto, and one of Kabuto's subordinates. I glared daggers at the condemning helper. "Could you screw me over anymore?" The man bit his finger in a nervous fashion and when no one was looking, nodded his head with an unbelievable vigor.

_Today is just peachy._ I stared at Orochimaru, who ignored me for the expecting mother. Before I could speak, he answered my forming question. "I think I'm the father." A simple answer with no hint of surprise or panic laced into his tone. "I'm pretty sure I fucked her nine months ago. But then again, anyone could of." He rolled back his head and smiled at the memories he reviewed. "If I recall correctly, she was a virgin. She was horrible in bed, but the screaming, blood, and knowledge that I deflowered her, made it all worth the while."

"Don't you care you bastard!" He turned and gave me a look that told me he was angry.

"No."

"What the hell is wrong with you!" He tensed. He was reaching a boiling point. "So tell me, what have I done wrong to piss you off now?"

He was absolutely livid now. I couldn't believe he was holding it in. Later wasn't going to be too fun. "It's not the time nor place to discuss it." He ended the discussion then and there. He continued to want the woman in pain, being turned on, and not caring who noticed.

.

It was about twelve more hours of watching woman scream, before it actually came out. When it did, I was so happy I stayed and watched. I could tell Kabuto didn't want to hold it, so I took his burden away. It was a girl. Her head was nearly bald. Black tufts of hair were visible though. Her eyes were golden, but not snake-like. "I think it is your daughter..." I whispered, not intending (or wanting) Orochimaru to hear. Orochimaru did stare at her.

Her frail arms reached around until she saw me. She tugged lightly on my shirt and when my nipple was exposed began to furiously suck on it. I laughed. "Sorry, sweetie. You won't get any milk from me. That's your mother's job." I turned to the mother. She was dead. She bled out and no one bothered to try and help her.

The baby was lifted from my arms. "She was expendable. It doesn't matter anyway. I doubt it will survive the experiments it'll go through." I noticed two things in Orochimaru's heartless declaration. One: He called her "it". He wasn't referring his own child as a human or person. Two: HE WAS GOING TO EXPERIMENT ON HIS DAUGHTER! What the hell was wrong with him!? His own daughter. His own flesh and blood!

"Come now Kiki, we have much to discuss." The baby stared up at her father with curiousity and awe. She began laughing and playing with his hair. He stared impassively.

"You have to name her. You can't keep going around referring to her as an it." He gave me his trademark smirk.

"I can."

I ran up alongside him. I whispered in the baby's ear soothing words to uplift her, knowing she didn't understand anything. "Shhh. I'll be your new mommy for now. I'll protect you from Daddy. Your name will be Akana. That's your real mommy's name." I pressed my hand to her cheek. She responded by smiling and wrapping all of her five fingers around my one. _I'll protect you from Daddy. _I kissed her head and then in the heat of the moment kissed Orochimaru's cheek. He glared and practically clawed off his face to wipe it off. It was going to be hell.

We entered his room and he locked the door. "I'm going to repeat a story I heard and I want you to correct any mistakes I make, clear?" He stared at me. "Clear?"

"Hai. But wh-"

"Don't speak until I tell you. And only speak the answer I want to hear. I belive we've been through this before. So do you understand now or should I force the concept into your head? Don't speak just nod yes for you understanding." I nodded. "Good. The story has a prelogue first involving a few conditions that were not fullly completed." The conditions I agreed to. I had hoped he forgot about them. " But the main story starts with a blind woman who needed help back to her room..."

**OKAY PEOPLE! REVIEW! This is the best, longest chapter I have ever written! I will continue other plots that you people thought I dropped and maybe i'll cut Croatoan from the picture to keep the Oro x Kiki pairing. Maybe. Review. Bye.**

**P.S. And I know my last chapters weren't very good, but I'M BACK!! I feel better.**

**1 - What is the meaning?**


	35. A One Night Stand, Standing Against You

It was the hissing in his voice that tipped Kiki off that he was _mad. _Not even mad, livid. "Let me give you a total recount of what happened that night. Just in case it slipped your mind."

_There was a thick silence before I was roughly grabbed and dragged back to my room. Maybe, I felt wreckless or maybe I still was high on drugs. Either way, when we got to my room, I felt for his face and draggd him down for a kiss. When at last his lips were on mine, I forced my tounge in his mouth and explored. I broke the kiss panting. A voice that wasn't Orochimaru's interrupted my gasps. "Hey sweetie I'm happy to help anytime, but thanks."_

_I wasn't stunned. Rather I broke out into a wild grin and answered, "Your welcome! Come visit me anytime 'cause you're one hell of a kisser!"_

"Tell me, do you love playing a slut with all my subordinates? Have you gotten any action from Kabuto-kun or Kimimaro-kun?" His hand was wrapped around my throat. "And what of my conditions? You didn't forgetthem, did you? I haven't."

_Condition 1: At 6:00 a.m. every morning we go to the training grounds and spar._

_Condition 2: Answer every question I ask and truthfully_

_Condition 3: You will follow all my orders_

_Condition 4: You won't ever betray me_

_Condition 5: You won't keep secrets from me_

_Condition 6: If you go into some sort of episode, I can kill or sedate you and keep you monitored_

_Condition 7: You're opinions won't ever matter unless you're asked to give it_

_Condition 8: You will assist me in any and all of my experiments_

_Condition 9: If any of these rules are broken, the consequence will be your death or the death of a friend_

_Condition 10: Not matter if Iro dies or someone else dies that you know, you are to stay in Otogakure with me._

"Is it sinking in yet? As far as I'm concerned, you've broken 5 of these rules that I know of. Tell me, have you actually broken all of them? WHY!" Kiki made out scaggled gasps as the oxygen couldn't reach her. "If you're wondering how I figured it out, it was simple. My dear, you were quite careless. That man from the dungeon was the one who escorted you to your room that time. He told me it on accident. He said the hot chick who shoved her tongue down my throat is with some pregnant girl. Did you even bother to get his name? Want me to give it to you? It _was_ Katsu. Hanhikari Katsu. Funny name it was, ne?" He tossed her against the wall. "Anything to say?"

"IT was supposed to be you." The whisper came so quietly, she knew she had to repeat herself. "I was so doped up on drugs. It was supposed to be you. Always you. Damn it. I love you and for that I hate you. What in God's name have you done to me? Nothing was supposed to be like this. I had hopes and dreams. But now, I'm a caged bird. You've taken all my reasons to sing or even stay alive.This is all your fault. I HATE YOU." I punched him in the face and shoved him away. I ran out the door. I ran down the halls. I stopped in front of the door that I prayed could lift these burdens.

What were these burdens? I don't even know. I was so confused. I always was. Even in that false happiness that I had lived in the Village Hidden by the Wolves, I had some sort of happiness. Ignorance is bliss, ne? I wanted to go back to those times, but I couldn't. And I never would. I lived freely, where ambitions grew and dreams were infinite. When she came here, it all went downhill. She gave a heavy sigh and twisted the knob in front of her.

Now maybe it was her racing mind. Or maybe she honest to God didn't hear them. Or perhaps she didn't want to hear them. The obnoxious giggling and moans. Either way see wished she didn't see. She walked in with eyes holding trust and stood there with eyes widened because of betrayal. She had no idea who the woman was. She hadn't even seen her around the base. But then, she saw enough of her to last an entire lifetime. Croatoan stared at Kiki from underneath the naked woman. Kiki dwaddled a little longer than necessary, before shouting, "Gomenasai, I didn't mean to intrude", over her shoulder and running like hell, as Croatoan shouted for her to wait.

Eventually she collapse on the floor crying. She heard and saw the feet in front of her knowing it was Orochimaru, but she refused to move. After more sniveling, he picked her up bridal style and brought her back to their room. She didn't fight back. She didn't protest. She stayed still and cried silently. At the room, he set her down on the bed and whispered in her ear, "Why is it, out of all the ones you love, I'm the only one still here and not betraying you? Do you even notice that?" She heard him, but didn't quite care at the moment. He was so warm up against her. And his silky hair was caressing her face. She heard the screeching of a chair being dragged across the floor. She looked up a moment and saw him sitting in front of her.

"My sister she was the exact opposite of me. That's what my mom always said. Oneechan's name was... is Sakura. A common name, ne? She was all white. Pale skin. White hair. White clothes. Dog ears like me. I never showed you my ears, have I? That's funny. I used to use, well I still do, genjutsu to fix my appearance. I barely know what my true form is. My eyes, when I was younger my eyes changed colors. They went from black to purple and sometimes turned into slits. I used the genjutsu to keep them black and hide the scars on my body. I have many. Funny. I could have probably use the technique to cover my dog ears up. I wonder why I didn't..."

"What scars? I've seen your body, time after time, but you had few." Neither knew why they were rambling on pointlessly, but they kept it up. Orochimaru stared intently at Kiki trying to understand what game she was playing, but he couldn't find the answer.

"I know. But I told you, I use genjutsu to cover them up. I might seem tomboyish at times, but I'm a girl at heart. I can get self-conscious, just like anyone else." She stopped smiling and returned Orochimaru's stare with the upmost seriousness. "Do you want to see them? My scars, I mean. Do you?" Before he could respond, she began to completely undress. When she stripped to her panties, she stood up from the bed she had been sitting on and released her jutsu. In a puff of smoke she temperarily vanished from sight. The clouds thinned out leaving her exposed. Almost all of her body was covered in scars.

"I truly am a pacifist, but sometimes I can't help the fighting. Over the years I've gotten into countless fights and never left one unscathed. You gave me this one." She pointed to her left shoulder. When she lowered her index finger, she fell silent, but not for long. "Did you know I'm really alot older than I look? I look seventeen or nineteen at the oldest. Guess how old I really am!" She paused for his answer.

"I don't want to. Just tell me if you're going to." His mind was elsewhere at the moment, staring at her exposed body. The size of the scars varied and were horrible, but weren't the only interesting things there. She had a tatoo, on the opposing side of her curse mark, on her shoulder. It was an upside down pentagram. As confusing as Kiki was, he highly doubted her being a satanist. During his musings, Kiki stopped talking, thinking he wasn't listening. "Fine, I'll guess... twenty-two."

"Nope. Thirty-eight. Surprised." At the time no. Orochimaru always knew that someone like her couldn't be as young as she looked. She acted too much older than a teenager. "You know at my village, a few months before you raided it, there was a man who was hanging around town. He had white hair, green eyes, was taller than me, and always wore a ratty cloak that he wrapped completely around himself. When I first met him, I thought he was so weird, but I talked to him anyway. We had some of the most interesting conversations. Most of the time we didn't even agree. Odd, ne? I had a little crush on him. He seemed like such a nice man. Was he you?"

"Do I match that description?"

"Genjutsu. That changes appearance. You were scoping out the village before destroying it., weren't you?" A smirk covered his lips.

"It's sad how you figured me out too late. If only you were sooner-" Kiki sat on Orochimaru's lap and kissed him. She pressed her body tightly against his. After ending the kiss, she worked her way down his neck. She stopped when the shirt got in the way.

Everything in the room was still. Orochimaru was still trying to understand her game, but it was becoming hard. _He_ was becoming hard. Kiki rose her head to his ear. "It always will be you. Because I belong to you. Take me? I want things to go right and not to fight with myself anymore. I want to be able to have what I want. Please Orochimaru?" He wasted no time tossing her off of him, to the bed and swiftly tossing his own clothes off.

Orochimaru panted heavily as he looked down at Kiki's naked body. A blush was permanently burned onto her cheeks. She kept trying to look away, but Orochimaru forced her head to stare at him. She had a small smile gracing her lips, challenging him to make her scream. Her plans included torturing him with her silence, he could see it in her eyes. But he wanted that scream, no. He _needed_ that scream! He needed to see that scream ripping from her throat as she writhed uncontrollably beneath him. He smiled sweetly and kissed her. When she put her arm around his shoulder, he shoved as hard as he could into her. Being so unexpecting, she screamed in pain and dug her claws into Orochimaru's shoulder.

Blood sprang up from the wounds an sweared on Kiki's body, unleashing a more animalistic side to the snake on top of her. He went faster and put her in as much pain as possible by biting and sucking and scratching. After a while her cries of pain turned into moaning. He saw the overwhelment in her eyes, but tortured her worse. He held down her arms so she could move and watched her reaction. She breathed heavily, digging her nails into the palm of her hand. Then suddenly he couldn't track her expression. She began screaming his name over and over again, and she couldn't keep still. Her head moved wildly back and forth as if saying no. And her legs. They thrashed around until I lifted my body a little. Then they wrapped around my waist forced my into her again.

She took control. Somehow she managed to flip them over so now she was on top. Now she was holding his hands down. Now she was going to make him scream. Kiki bit his ear while breathing into it. Then she attacked his neck. For someone with such little experience, she knew what she was doing. She let his hands free and kissed him. Her claws dragged down, making more blood. Orochimaru took his hand and forced her head to bite his neck again. He wanted the moaning and whispering by his ear again. She pushed away now covered in his blood. She sat down on his length and began to rock her hips. She held on to his waist and squeezed. At some point she tossed her head back and screamed again, and thats when Orochimaru noticed.

Her teeth were turning into fangs. Her normally sharp nails were claws. In small ways she was turning more animal. The sex they were having was awesome. Orochimaru was estatic and in pure ectasy over it, but he realised she was a hanyou meaning part of an animal. She was probably in heat. His thoughts were interrupted by his owning screeching noise. It was feeling so nice, he didn't care what she was in, at the moment. She stopped and began licking blood off her fingers, but she was still drenched in it. His blood. He had a right to her blood then. He pulled himself from under her and used his fangs on her and cut into her body with the tip of the Kusanagi.

Eventually Orochimaru reached his orgasm, after two hours of fucking each other in their own blood. As Kiki layed beside a sleeping Orochimaru on the bed, she struggled to remove the possessive hands from around her waist and shoulders. In the corner on the floor she heard the baby crying. A sudden sadness overcame her as she realized being with him took away her dreams of the family and love. The baby was left alone to wail.

**Okay. Here it is the moment you all wanted. **

**.. Now ... based on both lemons ... who do you think Kiki considers better in bed ... Oh well ... next chappie will be about the man who raped her. yeah he's dead but ... my story. and about Rei ... he's dead too. and Kabuto and Kimimaro and Katsu ... again ...**

**REVIEW!!**


	36. A Mistake

Her eyes fluttered open the next morning as she awoke in a daze. The first thing that hit her was the scent of blood. The second was what she had done last night. Last night she had sex with Orochimaru. Last night Croatoan cheated on her. Last night she helped a woman give birth to Orochimaru's baby. Last night. Was it a mistake? Dear god what have I done? I screwed up and Orochimaru is right behind me, isn't he? I turned around and sure enough a half naked snake sannin stood in all his glory. With his shirt off, I noticed the cuts I made still on him. "I'm planning on having Kabuto heal the too deep ones." He rummaged through his drawer in search of a clean shirt. "Don't pretend you're asleep. I know you aren't. I already took a shower. I suggest you do the same. You smell like sex."

He walked out the door. Something wasn't right. Oh yes. He was happy. On the drawers Orochimaru was previously at was a note. Kiki assumed it was for her since if it wasn't it would be better hidden. I opened it up, hoping it wasn't about last night. _Go to Kabuto and get me one male body in his twenties and one female body in her twenties also. _At the bottom was something else that I almost missed. _P.S. Bring the child with you. And I hope tonight will be as fun as last night._ It wouldn't. I can assure you that. I read the note again and devised a plan that would solve two problems. I know it would get me into a lot of trouble, but after all when haven't I? The closest village was over seventy miles away. It might take hours to get there. Kiki sighed in exasperation and took the suggestion about hopping in the shower.

It took her an hour to get showered, dressed, and work out a few kinks in her plan. Finally, though, she was ready. Ready might not be a good word. Prepared was more like it. Ready would mean she wouldn't linger at the door or be scared to face the world today. One night, and now she was a frickin' scaredy cat. And that was an insult. She was partially a dog demon! Cats are EVIL. Period. She sighed. Arguing with herself wasn't helping anyone.

The plan began with Kabuto. Of course she was going to comply with Orochimaru's orders to an extent. Kiki took in a deep breath and let go of the door way. She walked silently over to the medical room Kabuto was in, playing scenarios of her plan over and over again. "Kabuto-san? Are you here?"

"Hai. Was there something you wanted?" Kabuto looked up from a corpse he was dissecting. I looked at it. It was a she and she must have just recently died because her complexion was still peach and held some warmth. Her eyes were lazily mov-

"Oh my God. Kabuto-san! What the hell are you doing!? That woman isn't dead yet!" It was true. Still spilling out shallow breaths, her eyes told the whole story. She was paralyzed and could feel it all.

He smirked at me. "I know. Live subjects are always more... more... Well it's hard to describe to someone like you. You needed...?" Kabuto did his habit of pushing his glasses up again. I wondered why he did that. Whenever he did his eyes were blocked out.

I regained my composure the best I could and tried to carry out my orders. "Orochimaru asked me to get him a thirty to forty year old man and woman and a twenty year old man and woman. He wanted sets I suppose." He looked at me strangely before preparing the bodies. "What's with that look?"

"Nothing. It's just odd how Orochimaru-sama wouldn't pick the corpses up himself. He was in here earlier to heal a few scratches." He smiled while pushing up his glasses. "Any ideas where the scratches and bites that covered his torso came from? Or why he didn't mention his needs to me?"

I sighed deep. "Well last night, there was this fight. I attacked him, but he just shook it off with his utter amusement. He knows how much things like this bother me, so I guess this is his revenge. Can you just make this quick? After I retrieve these guys, he wants me to help experiment on them or something. I just want this to be over."

Kabuto gave me a fake comforting smile. "Of course! I understand completely! So it was two pairs of bodies, age ranges thirty and twenty? Coming right up." He dug through a drawer behind him looking for a particular scroll. "Ah-ha! Hai, doozo! (1) Enjoy!" He waved his hands in a shooing manner as he escorted me to the door. I stood outside and alone in the hallway. My plan worked. If it truly did, Rei's cadaver was preserved and in my possession.

_. Space_

It had taken only half an hour to get to the village. I was really surprised at how far off my previous calculations were. I was going to do something risky. I looked at for a nice house with a nice couple in it and then waited for them to go inside. I set Akana on the porch with a note:

_Dear people,_

_I'm really sorry about this. I never wanted to part with her. She's so beautiful. Her okaasan died after birth and I was there. I can't take care of her nor is where I'm staying safe. Please take care of her like your own. Her name is Akana like after her okaasan. If you want to keep her or can't, please make sure she goes to a good home._

_From a friend_

I hope she would be okay. Next was Rei. I searched around for half an hour for a shrine of some sort. Wouldn't you know it was at the very end of town? I opened the scroll that had Rei's body in it, unraveled it, and brought out the corpse hoping it was preserved. It was. I brought him inside the shrine and asked a priest to give him a proper burial, but I couldn't stay. "I'm sorry but I have something important to do. Can I at least have a few moments alone with him to say goodbye?" The priest was an old fellow. Big ears, white, bushy eyebrows, and beard. He had a bad hunch and a large, wooden stick for a cane. He gave a curt nod.

I stared at Rei. His clothes had blood splattered on them, not to mention the gaping hole where his kidney should have been. I closed my eyes for a moment. "Rei-kun, I'm sorry. So sorry this happened. I wish I could at least have had this moment knowing you died with your boots on. Good-bye. Say hi to Iro-kun for me." I left without bothering to tell the old man. I already was gone too long. I must of raised suspicion by now. I'd have to run like the devil himself was after me.

_. Space_

I had made it back to the complex in twenty four minutes. I made it to the lab in four. If I was lucky he forgot about the scheduled meeting. I opened the door and was greeted. "Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. My poor little seductress. I thought I could trust you. Such a pity." Orochimaru was laying across the metal operating table, holding his head up with his hand. His legs were crossed.

I felt naked suddenly. Again guilt overwhelmed me, after a thought that I had betrayed him tainted my mind. I avoided his eyes by acknowlegding my surroundings. The room was blood-splattered. Corspes were littering the floor. Some were fresh. Some were decayed. Some were missing chunks of flesh. In the center of it all, like a king, was Orochimaru with those eyes. "I'm sorry I was so late. I was-"

"You missed it. The whole experiment. I fell asleep waiting for you. Tell me honestly. How long were you gone?" He stared expectantly.

I had a few excuses up my sleeve. They were believable too. "It was for maybe an hour or two. I'm sorry I was-"

Rage that was absent spontaneiously burst forth from him in a second. "With him weren't you! Don't think I don't know your plan! Kabuto told me how you brought out two extra bodies about your ages! You were planning to fake your deaths and escape. Did you enjoy fucking me Kiki? Were you thinking of Croatoan the whole time?" He sat up and stared at me with disgust. I tried to defend myself, but as he always does, didn't let me. "I don't want to hear it. Take these." He handed her a white, paper cup with two pills in it.

I gave a questioning glance. "And this is for...? I'm not sick." Was he going to use me for part of an experiment? Was that my punishment for missing everything?

"They're birth control. You were in heat, meaning you were fertile. I don't want to deal with a second newborn in the complex. Take them and leave."

I took the cup and stared at it as though it was poison. His child... The thought brought a blush to my cheeks. " I stole Rei's body and gave it a proper funeral. Then I gave away your daughter." It came out a mumbled whisper.

"What?" He furrowed his brow, making it hard to figure out if he had heard me and didn't believe me or was truly caught off guard and wasn't really listening.

"Why can't you ever fucking trust me! I know I betrayed you, but not in the manner you're thinking of! I took Rei's body and gave it to a shrine! I took Akana and gave her away to a new family. I'm not telling you where either of them are though!" I through the pills at his face. I turned to leave but he grabbed me and threw me to the ground. He stomped down on my stomach matching words to the rhythm.

" How. Dare. You. Contradict. Me! You. Filthy. Worthless. Whore!" I rolled away at the last attack but couldn't move much. He didn't go after me. "Understand you belong to me. I don't belong to you. Don't ever disrespect me. Ever." I clutched my gut. It was hurting so badly.

"That's why this loveless relationship is my hell. I have no place but as a doll to look at and play with. I refuse to be a doll. At least with him, I had a mind. At least while making love with Croatoan-" His foot pressed down on my neck.

"Don't ever speak that name. But now that you bring it up, who was better in bed? Hmm? I've been so curious." I choked. "I can't hear you. Speak up Kiki-chan! Me or Croatoan!" Truth be told, I had no answer. I never kept track. Even if it was only two times that I did it. I forced Orochimaru's leg to the side and knocked him to the ground. I rolled on top of him and forced him to stay steadily in place with a kunai.

"If you're jealous, do something about it! Get over it! You expect me to accept my new role as a doll so easily? It can't be done. I'll speak his name whenever I want! I had something with him and-"

"What about with me? What do you have with me?" He gazed at me solemnly. The anger was still there (then again it was always there), but had died some.

"You decide that remember? It doesn't matter what I want. I'm just a doll in love with you." He kissed me. His hand pushed on my head, causing his act to deepen. His body pressed so close to mine. The friction. The heat. No. Not like this. Not here. Not with the dead, emotionless eyes staring at me with such accusation. Not drenched in the blood of people I ignored. No. NO! "GET OFF OF ME!" I pushed him away and ran. All the way out the door I slipped on blood and dismembered limbs. I ran without evident care, except for the blooming tears. Erasing my mind as usual until I crashed into something.

I cocooned my stomach with my arms. It still hurt pretty bad. Orochimaru might have broken or at least fractured some ribs. I jolted at the familiar voice before staring up into the eyes of Katsu. "I thought you were dead. He said... Well he used past-tense a lot." Katsu backed up, holding out his arms as if to say, Woah! Steady girl! "Hey!"

"Stay back! You almost got me killed, you psycho bitch!" He turned to run away, but Kiki's voice stopped him with the beginning of a conversation. The tear were long forgotten as the new topic at hand consumed her thoughts.

"What the hell!? You almost got me killed! Or screwed over pretty badly. Why or how are you alive!" The guy caused this messed change between me and Orochimaru. He forced me to confront me and my feelings. He screwed me over big time!

"I'm alive because Orochimaru left me to die, but a medic came along and I lied my ass off to get him to heal me! Idiot... HOW DID I SCREW YOU OVER!" My eye twitched.

"Exactly! You got him mad at me and it ended up with sex and me giving away a baby!" I almost hit him. But sweet temptation caught my eye. His lips. Between those parted lips, the billowing smoke. Cigarettes. I quit. I swear. I never will touch another one. But I couldn't find anymore here. So long since I had one... Such I stress reliever. "Where'd you get that?"

"Huh?" I was drooling a little. From here I could smell the sour taste. Invading my nostrils. So intoxicating. Such a tease. If I killed him for it, would it be so bad? _No. Take it. Take it now! _**Shut up Kaji.** _Trust me it'll do us both good. _**I could just ask. **_If and when he says no? _**We'll do it your way. Deal? **_Deal._

"Gimme a cigarette. Dear God I need one. Please?" His eyes said he was considering it, but everthing here came with a catch. Even then I couldn't trust him to hold up his end of the bargain. I should get my stuff right off the bat.

"What do I get out of it?" Oh this was too easy. Never start out on asking what you could get. First rule of bargaining. You need to start off at a reasonably high price and then the other guy will bargain down. This guy was terrible.

"Okay, how about I don't bring it to Orochimaru's attentions that you're still alive? Sound good." He tossed me the whole pack. "Don't suppose you got a light?" I moved the cigarette from my mouth and someone else lit it. I turned around to face Orochimaru. The lighter he held between his thumd and index, flicked closed and his other hand grabbed my arm and led me to our room. He opened the door and shocked me with the emptiness of it. My stuff was gone. "What did you do?"

"I moved you out. Isn't this want you wanted? Freedom? Trust? This is all I can give you for now." His mouth dipped closed to my ear, nuzzling my cheek. "I want everything you gave Croatoan-kun." He barely managed to cough the name out. "I want everything you gave Kaito-kun. I want it, so why won't you give it to me?"

I shook my head. "You can't have it that way. You're not that person. I'm sorry but it's true. Someone like you can't understand what I had with them. No one owned anyone. And there was complete freedom and trust. Orochimaru if you want what I gave them, those conditions have to go. And you can't beat me to near death. Or rape me. Or threaten to. Or cheat on me. But you propbably won't want to be limited to one woman, ne?"

"Sex often and it'll be fine. The conditions stay until you prove yourself loyal. I can beat you if I want to. You deserve it when I do." He got roaming happy hands. "How about tonight..."

"Orochimaru. Oyasuminasai. (2) 'Til tomorrow." I left to search for my new room. I knew it was probably close by. He didn't grow perfect trust in five minutes. It comforted me all the same to know I would stay near him. I wished I could have asked if I could move back in, but my shyness wouldn't let me.

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I was reading when the knock came. It was so late. 1:47 AM to be precise. I had no idea who it could be. Kabuto wouldn't disturb me this late. Neither would any of my subordinates. I walked to the door and opened it after adjusting my robes. It was Kiki in black lingere (sp?). A blood red shape of lipstick covered her face. She was wearing too much make up. _She looks like a whore... _"Why are you dressed like that?" I eyed her. She was sexy in that but didn't exactly turn me on as she usually does. Maybe it was because that shyness in her eyes was replaced with pride and confidence.

"Oh , Orochimaru..." The name rolled off her tongue in playful syllables. "I've dressed up for you. I want you now!" She launched herself onto me with a ruthless attack of bites and tearing off my clothes. The lipstick was smearing over my ear as her tongue trailed inside it. This wasn't like Kiki! What was going on!?

**You'll find out later! BWAHAHA! Wait for next chapter. I dare you to guess! Review please.**

**(1) Here you go.**

**(2) Good Night.**


	37. Overcome

**Kiki's POV:**

Three rooms down. Yes, that was close. So very, very close. I sighed thinking about ideas Orochimaru might suddenly harbour. All of them were perverted. At second glance, I saw my room had all my things in it, but nothing was organized. Actually it was like they threw everything into the center and left with twenty bucks. (My wallet wasn't there) I turned to face my antagonist and saw the look of eagerness in his eye. I smiled warmly, sliding up beside him and putting my hand in his. I kissed him on the lips.

He smirked and clenched my hand, trying to tug me in his room. I moved so close to his ear, breathing my warm breath on the shell of it. "Nope. Not tonight big boy." I pushed him away and ran to my own domain, making sure to slam the door to show my finality. The chill in the air should have foreshadowed the events to come, but all I did was become uneasy and nervously rub my arms. You could tell it was a lot colder in here than out there. I could see my breath spreading out in foggy puffs. I stared at the door and wondered if I should open it again. I shook my head and decided against it. How foolish is it to be scared of nothing?

I got to work on reorganizing my room. I took all my clothes and folded them neatly, putting them in particular piles for later. I pushed my hope chest in the center of the wall on the opposite wall of the bed. The chest of drawers, I placed next to the door and began setting my clothes in it. The last object was a mirror. I never really owned one. At my old village one was always hung on the wall. 'How else are you supposed to pretty yourself up?' They told me. I don't were make up. I don't mess around much with my hair. I barely noticed that one because I rarely used it.

This mirror was different. It had an unique quality about it. An attractive pull luring you in. It wasn't very special though. It was an oval shaped one with black wood rimming the edges. Gold writing was enscribed on the side:

ミラーによるパス

新しい精神は現われる

ガラスによるパス

そして犠牲は見過ごされている (1)

I mumbled the words to myself. The breeze that evidently froze my room passed by me. I gripped the mirror in both hands and prepared to hang it on the wall. _Don't look into it. Leave now! _The small pleading voice sounded so familiar. So close, but as if in a trance my hands moved to their own accord. I hung i slowly and stared at my reflection. My eyes, my face. Her eyes, her face. The second face in the mirror. Behind me but not. I couldn't turn. I could close my eyes. Shut out reality? She grinned. Her eyes filled in black. The black engulfed me as I passed out.

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I tried to push her off, but she pushed herself back on. "Kiki stop! I warn you, I won't tolerate you not listening." She gazed up at me from her position ontop of me, on the bed.

"Spare the rod, spoil the child."

I was trying to be nonviolent towards her, but the rage burst forth and I lost my thoughts. "God dammit Akana! Stop trying my patience!" I hooked her jaw with my fist. She fell limp but I didn't stop. "Perhaps I have spared the rod one to many times, ne? I should listen to you, Kiki, so much more often. So what punishment would you propose? A) Your blood bath. B) My experiment help. C) Help village raid. You weren't gone so long, when you got rid of that baby, which means you went to a nearby village. Am I close?"

"I choose the experiments. They sound fun." She smirked and walked over, gliding her hand along my bare chest. That sly smile. Those eyes. None of it seemed like it belonged to Kiki. "But can't we have some fun first.?" She disgusted me. I slapped her hand away, but she only smiled. She wasn't right.

"Go. Get out of my face."

"Where? Should I skip over to the labs and wait-"

"No. Go into your room and stay put." She was dissappointed to say in the least. I walked away with Kiki stuck in my mind. I hadn't called her Kiki. I called her Akana. She reminded me of that annoying bitch. She wasn't some one easy to get along with. Not to say she wasn't easy. She fucked me at every opportunity. A damned nymphomaniac. I leaned by the wall, tossing back my head, remembering Akana.

_I walked by her room. It was winter, but not so cold. I looked in Akana's room._ _She was Kabuto's latest assistant. She had reading glasses that unattractively added years to her face that she luckily hardly ever wore and the look in her eyes said she was just as twisted as I was in a sense. She wore a shirt that showed an inappropiate amount of cleavage and a skirt that showed too much thigh, all hidden by her lab coat unless she and I were alone. Are eyes met and the lust grew to an infinite high._

It was after that day, that the fooling around started. It was after a month or so that I realized how obsessed she was with me. Other women I flirted with or raped ended up dead. People I began to criticize or look down on dissappeared. She showed up everywhere I went and before long I connected everything. I may have figured it out, but I showed no regards to her actions. It was no bother to me at first. Many of my subordinates have blind faith or love for me.

Her craze then took a change for the worst. People who I praised and acknowledged more so than her began dying. I thought it went to far when she attacked Kimimaro. He was well and my next body at the time. I dragged Akana by the hair down to the dungeons where I had my way with her. And where I let nine other men take her. I stripped her of her rank and kept her as a lowly prisoner. I beat her half to death and warned her about interferring with my plans.

_I kicked her harder in her ribs. I was trying to teach her a lesson but it wasn't sinking in. "Akana, because you were such an effective worker, I'll give you a chance to redeem yourself. But first, why were you trying to sabotage me?"_

_Her eyes widen as she shook her head wildly. "No! I would never!"_

_"Then what is it?" I forced her head to face me. "Answer me."_

_"I love you! Oh Orochimaru, I love you! Other people are trying to break us apart, but I'm not letting them!" She kissed me. I forced her back onto her stomach._

_"My dear, I need you to realize, I don't give a damn about you. Sex and love two oh so different things. You only need to understand your position here and do it well."_

_"No . . . No! You can't do this to me! I- We- together!"_

_"Get over it." I found it annoying to watch her blubber so idiotically. I turned to leave. _

_"I'm pregnant! Your child. It's yours! I can tell. I know it! What are you going to do?" I stopped. I didn't exactly believe her. You see, she somehow managed to grasp on to the dillusion that we were in a relationship and I noticed that woman in an ending relationship blurt out all sorts of rubbish in an attempt to save it._

_"I don't care. Have a happy motherhood." I left her locked down in the cells._

I never gave her a second thought until now. When Kiki helped her with the baby. Now Kiki acted so much similiar to Akana. I had to work on this. I headed in the direction of Kimimaro's room. He knew Kiki. He was a very close aquaintance. Not so close, it bothered me, but close enough to keep tabs on her. Kimimaro's room had been placed near the medical ward in case of emergencies. Yes, Sasuke was going to be my next host, but after that maybe Kimimaro will be confirmed completely cured and then become my host.

I stood over his bed. He was asleep. It was funny the way he slept. He was a light sleeper. Not to mention it was hard to tell whether he was awake, asleep, or unconscious. That dignity about him was odd since he was really quite mindless. Blindly loyal as I said many of my followers are. I shook his shoulders gently. "Kimimaro-kun. Wake up. I have something important I wish to discuss with you." Immediately his eyes opened without conflict. It had been as though he had only recently closed them.

"Hai, Orochimaru-sama?" He sat up and looked me directly in the face with his childish glow. Lately he seemed more detached then lately. He probably was upset with how I didn't need him anymore and I devoted all my free time to Sasuke or Kiki. He never said it. It was written on his face.

"Something is wrong with Kiki. Something not quite normal. She seems to be- Do you remember the woman Akana?" I watched his face for a reaction. He never reacted, but it was a habit.

"Yes. She was the woman who tried to kill me about a year ago, correct?"He moved his hand to brush stray strands of hair from his cheeks.

"Ten months actually, but time doesn't matter."

"I heard she recently died. Was that not true?"

"Yes, it was. She died in child birth." I fell silent, waiting for Kimimaro to make the connection between the two conversations.

"What links does Kiki have with Akana?"

I smiled. "That's precisely what I need to know." Kimimaro looked at me with an expression saying he didn't understand. So I began to state my hypothesis. What kind of man would I be, not to view this as an experiment?

**Kiki's POV:**

_It hurt. My head. I felt weird. A tingling sensation covered my body. I saw my room as if I was looking in from the doorway, except I could from this angle. I put my hand forward and felt glass. Glass. I pounded on it, but no sound, no movement. I felt so weak. I knew the mirror was responsible. It trapped me. Sucking out my energy. I knew I had to try to escape now or else I wouldn't be able to at all. I wasn't breathing. I didn't need to... I was fading. I felt that. So little energy._

_I reached out to touch the glass again. I took both hands and pressed my palms to the freezing surface. I concentrated all my energy. This had to work now or I might not be able to survive much longer. A faint purple glow escaped her as she exerted all her power. It was all or nothing now. She refused to collapse. She refused to. . . But it was so hard. . It was all fading. . ._

**Review. Now. No shirking off. Or else. HA! You are all confused!**

**(1) The pass by the mirror**

**the new soul appears**

**The pass by the glass**

**and the sacrifice is overlooked**


	38. Mirror, Mirror On the Wall

Kiki sat up dizzy. She looked at her hands, her body. She seemed fine. She tried to stand and found she could easily. She tried to leave her room but decided to sit back down after hearing someone in front of the door. Orochimaru came in with Kimimaro at his side. "Orochimaru-san! I'm actually glad you're here! The oddest thing happened to me and I'm not sure-" Kimimaro headed to the bookshelf, fingering each title slowly. "You know, you don't have to be completely silent when I talk. It makes me feel like you're ignoring me."

"Orochimaru-sama, I found the books I was telling you about. This one is the demon and spirits one and this one is the exorcism and sutras. Which would you like to look at?" Kimimaro held both in one hand, eyeing the mirror rather than Orochimaru or me. I think he could tell to some degree something wasn't normal with it.

"Better be both. Damn her. Didn't stay in her room like I told her to. Should have figured. Come now. We need to resolve this quickly." Orochimaru gave a quick wave and left with Kimimaro trailing behind. The door shut quietly with only the soft click of the handle heard. _What the hell! Ignoring me like I'm such a minority! And taking my stuff without permission! I feel sick enough as it is but-_ Kiki's thoughts wee cut off as she noticed her activated chain around her wrist. The purple glow absent. _That's strange. . ._

Needless to say, Kiki made the split second decision to follow it. It should have been activated and it seemed odd that no one acted like they noticed it. She passed by so many people, but they just tended to their own business. In a way that was a relief, considering how she didn't want to stop for chit-chat or be told someone was looking for her and she had a mission. The task at hand was first a priority. Mostly because of her intuition. Deep inside her a voice screamed, 'Somethings wrong! Why can't you see what's wrong!?' The light-headedness came back briefly. It felt as though she was still trapped in the mirror getting her energy taken away.

Holding her head, she came to the end of the trail and stopped dead. Literally. She was staring at herself, up and walking around a medical lab, conversing with Kabuto. Mimiko and Li-Li were watching her intently, like she was a prisoner ready to make the life-altering dash. _Oh Kami-sama! I'm dead, aren't I? _Both of her summons looked up at her in a questioning manner. They solemnly shook their heads. _Not yet._

_That's not me is it? It can't be! I'm here! _ "Kabuto-san, I was wondering how the experiment with altering a patient's blood flow to see how it altered chakra flow went." Kabuto stopped organizing his work space and looked up momentarily confused at me (or the me that wasn't me). He passed the manner off as trivial and continued his tinkering.

"That experiment, ne? I suppose you were told to look through the old files. I never thought Orochimaru-sama would actually trust you enough to let you mess around with his experiments. I want you to understand, he takes these things very serious, so don't mess around, okay?" He accepted an overly happy nod as an answer. "Well that theory didn't go so well, for the patient anyway. Reversing the blood flow slowed down the rate at which chakra was summoned. At some point, the chakra began reversing itself and backed up the chakra points, did a little internal damage, and eventually the patient died. Orochimaru-sama was able to transform it into a very useful jutsu."

"That's woderful! How so exactly?" _How so did this happen!? _Li-Li answered. _You chanted the spell, looked into the mirror, and your soul was absorbed. Someone else took over your body and is posing as you. You managed to escape the mirror before it devoured you completely. That chain is all that's connecting you to your body now_. _You're surviving off of the little spirit energy you have left. If you don't get inside your body soon you're going to die. I'll give you four, maybe five days tops. We might be able to extend the deadline a tad bit if we give you some of our energy, but there is a possibility your form could reject it. Let's wait and see._

_How am I going to fix this? _"Oddly enough patients didn't seem to be able to feel the problems taking place. So in battle, exerting more energy and forcing chakra to go against the newly established flow, will have them kill themselves. Even if an opponent realized something was wrong, they wouldn't know what or how to fix it. Not to mention how the heart isn't meant to absorb blood. There are valves that prevent that so the heart starts moving slower, hindering most of their moves." Kabuto smiled as he remembered that experiment. "Good times. . . That was when I worked with my lab assisstant Akana. You met her already. She was the one who gave birth in the dungeons."

I stared at Kabuto. Is Akana the one who's possessed my body? They always said nice gals finished last. "Yes. That's right. What happened to her baby afterwards. I seemed to have forgotten." She dug her own grave there. Seeing how I was the only one (besides Orochimaru) who knew what happened to her and everyone knowing it, there was incriminating evidence pointing to her not being me! "Oh and I can't remember what the name was." I named her. Kabuto was definately there when I did, I think. Or was it Orochimaru? Well he might have been told I named her. Also, Akana probably doesn't know if it's a boy or girl.

"You tell me. From what I heard you named her yourself and hid it somewhere because you were scared Orochimaru might do something bad to it. That's why you're here right? As a punishment for that?" Akana shook her head. "What? You honestly, sincerely came here of your own free will because you wanted to? My, my Orochimaru has finally made you see things his way!" She smiled and chuckled softly continuing with a new topic. All the while I help but think she was saying 'Dear God this woman was one hell of an annoying goodie two shoes' over and over in her head.

I slumped to the floor defeated. I was like a ghost right now, couldn't talk, couldn't touch, couldn't be seen. _Wait, Li-, No. I know what you're thinking, but we can't. We agreed to be your summons so now people can only see us if you summon us. She can't summon us. You're cut off from your chakra so you can't summon us either. Gomen. _I retreated back to my mind, praying for a miracle. I wanted to do something, but there was nothing to do. Part of me wanted to go investigate the mirror, but I know if I got trapped inside again I might not be able to get back out.

**Kimimaro's POV:**

I could tell this wouldn't be easy. The books we borrowed from Kiki's room had no index or glossary so we couldn't find much easily. We were looking for a section on spirit possession. The exorcism book had many different types of things to try but we needed a specific answer, which we didn't have. A small piece of me was saying I had to look else where. That mirror. It wasn't. . . It made me feel uneasy. It had part of Kiki's chakra signature, along with part of Akana's, but there was another one that I could reconize. I felt as though I should bring it up but I didn't. And he could tell. Out of the corner of his eye he stared at me suspiciously. Finally he spoke up.

"Kimimaro-kun, I can't help but notice how on edge you seem. Are you feeling ill. I know you wouldn't hide anything from me, but I'm curious. . . If something's on your mind I would likefor you to speak up." I stayed silent. "Very well then." He went back to reading and I felt a intense aching in my chest as I betrayed my master. I don't know why, but something was holding me back from sharing my thoughts. It may have been the mirror itself. That third chakra signature had been strong and dark. I couldn't see how Orochimaru missed it. Maybe it was because it was only calling to me? It was only reaching out to me. Why? I searched through my book, these thoughts in mind.

"Orochimaru-sama. I think I found something useful! I'm not sure though." My voice perhaps showed too much eagerness but I wanted to prove my loyalty and worth. "What if we use this sutra to draw out Kaji? If Akana-san took Kiki's place that means Kaji might still be there. She wouldn't have known about her. Kaji is usually dormant, but wakes up whenever. If Akana-san is suppressing her without knowing it we could do it."

"How could she supress Kaji without knowing? That doesn't make much sense." Kimimaro stayed silent, thinking of an answer his master would approve of. It took him a while because he had to go through all that he knew about Kaji and Kiki in his head. Truth be told, he didn't know much, meaning he wasn't given much to go on. There were tidbits he learned from Kiki and comments made by Orochimaru or Kaji herself.

"If Kiki is part of Kaji and she is being supressed and overtaken that must be weakening her. It is worth a try. We won't lose much if we don't gain anything." Kimimaro sighed in relief as Orochimaru smiled after considering his thoughts.

"You're absolutely right Kimimaro-kun. At least we'll learn one plus two doesn't equal four. May I see that book?" I nodded and handed it over pointing out the part of the page where it explained how to draw another soul forward. He began skimmimg through, furrowing his eyebrows at hard to understand parts and twisting his lips into a smirk at the simplest ones. "Let's start preparing."

**Quick update. Short chapter. Sorry. Sick and staying home from school. Review please. If by now you don't understand what's going on in the fanfic, I'm crying.**


	39. The Thin Line

**Kimimaro's POV:**

I wasn't sure what Orochimaru had in mind as bait, but I gained a suspicion that he would use himself. It killed me to think of his selflessness. I wasn't let in on all of the plan. I was only told to help him prepare the nessecities for drawing Kaji out and to go get here. He stressed the importance of me not interfering while the ceromony was ongoing. I walked down five corridors already, but there was no sign of Akana or Kiki. (Was it still even Kiki? I'm not too sure.) I peeked into every room on the way and asked some of the people strolling about. I heard Kabuto-senpai's voice and hope renewed.

"Kabuto-senpai, I was looking out for Kiki. There's something important you should. . ." I stopped before I spoke too much information. In the room with him was none other than Kiki (Akana?). They were sitting together having a normal conversation. It seemed plausible that it could really happen. Akana had taken an immediate liking and held deep respect for Kabuto since they were introduced.

"Go on Kimimaro-kun. Just because I'm here doesn't mean you can't continue. We're all friends right?" She stared at me with a hollow smile, but I could tell by staring in her eyes, she was studying me. Questioning herself if I knew what happened. She was leaning to 'Yes, he does.'.

"There's no need. I was going to ask Kabuto-senpai if he saw you, to redirect the message that Orochimaru-sama wants to talk." I watched her with interest. My first instinct was she knows something is up and to get out. The manevolence in the room was building itself high. It was getting hard to breath or remain standing. And then just like that. . .

"Fine. I'll go. Care to show me which room I'm needed in?" She placed her hands on her hips, slightly swinging them in an intimidating way. One hand moved to run her hand through her hair, not noticing the ribbons tied on tightly. When she did, she stopped with a surprised look on her face. Her hands moved infront of her quickly. "Anoo. . . I-I need to . . . use the bathroom. I'll be back in a second." She stumbled to a different room.

Kabuto and I waited in silence for Kiki to come back, neither of us quite understood what just happened. Nor did we care much. It probably wasn't important. Kiki came back, confused, but normal enough. "Come on. Let's go." She grabbed my arm roughly.

**Akana's POV:**

I pulled at his arm but he wouldn't budge. He shook his head slowly. "No. Orochimaru-sama requested he see you alone. He's in the labs by the south entrance." He pointed out the door, even though that obviously would help. Was he nervous? _He knows._

"Huh? Aren't those labs abondoned?" Kimimaro shrugged. _Orochimaru wants to see me alone in an abondoned lab? This could be fun. _I skipped off after making sure (with no one else noticing)I had a kunai ready, my head with ribbons tied tightly and securely. Whoever this girl was, was a freak of nature (and from what Kabuto said) liked pissing off Orochimaru. But then again maybe that's why she was given a cursemark.

_Why the breast? Why not the neck? _I fingered the marking, feeling the steady beat of the heart below. Jealousy. Surging through and through the body. _Force bad thoughts down. Down. Down. _I stepped into the dark room and immediately was trapped between two arm. I left my guard drop after the kisses traveled down my neck. "Gomenasai Kiki-kun, I was in a bad mood before, but now I'm feel like having fun." He pressed against me, but wasn't aroused in the least. Men can't lie. I rubbed against his body. He shivered and led me to a chair in the middle of the room. A rug was under it. "First in the chair. Then the rug."

I was pushed into the chair and the rug was removed to reveal the circle of blood. It was some sort of occult satanic thing. **(Like Supernatural) **"Since when were you a cult member. Orochimaru don't tell me your mind went? How sad."

"You think my mind is gone? Only you would think that. Akana-chan, you're the one who possessed my woman after you died. I had to do something to get rid of you once and for all." He smiled and picked up a book. The circle was small enough so I couldn't move out of it. _Why can't I move out of it? _"Kiki, being a hanyou, won't be able to leave this. Since it's still her body, you inherited all of her weaknesses." He read out of the book and I faded. I was fading BUT HOW!? That mirror. I can't leave like this. The mirror made this my body now. I'm conneected to it. I can't be tossed out!

**Orochimaru's POV:**

She gritted her teeth and screamed a little but Kaji was already taking control. Kimimaro was right about this idea, but I couldn't help but feel he was keeping something from me. "_Orochi-kun. . . Thank you for summoning me. This bitch is so annoying."_

"Stop Kaji. We need to fix the problem before Akana takes control again." She began laughing at me. I threw a kunai at her face to shut her up. She caught it and stopped the chuckling. She slumped in the chair, apparently bored, fiddling with the weapon.

"Don't do that or we will lose this connection. This is technically her body now. Feeling pain will jolt her senses and wake her back up. It'll be harder to take control again. Otherwise, I can stay as long as I want. Why did you pretend not to know about the scars? Kimimaro-kun told you about them a long time ago. You never asked about her tattoo on her back either. Going a bit soft don't you think? Oh, wait. You thought if you spoiled the moment, you wouldn't get laid, right?"

"Maybe. I don't need to talk to you. I can wake Akana-chan up and still be able to fuck Kiki's body senseless. The only one who would lose is you and Kiki, so I suggest you cooperate." She smirked with closed eyes and took off her ribbons, letting her ears twitch about.

"That's better." She tossed the kunai in a random direction, sat up straight, eyes opened and focused on the man in front of her. "That lie is a load of shit. The bitch annoys you too. Don't deny it. You would of fucked her before if she didn't. Get over yourself. I'll tell you the solution if you answer a question: What did you find out when you investigated the ring?"

My turn. "What ever do you mean? What ring?"

"So you want to beat around the bush? Fine. Let me simplify this for you. The. Ring. You. Took. From. The. Man. Who. Tried. To. Rape. Kiki. You do remember that, right? You smashed his head in and stole a ring off his finger." She straightened up in the chair and almost looked like a proper young lady. Almost. I frowned after repeating her words in my head. She dared to mock my intelligence!? After this is over and done with, Kaji would get punished for sure.

"Why do you want to know? It doesn't really concern you much. He tried to rape you because you were stupid enough to ask for directions from a drunken rapist." I was so happy when I saw the hit to her pride. She teeth gritted as her hands clenched at her pant legs.

"First off, that was Kiki. Second off, we knew him from before. That time he attacked us, was the second time he tried to rape Kiki. We have a right to know about our attacker." She regained her composure after taking deep breaths.

"Nothing much. He belong to a group of rogue ninja in the Bingo book that only recently became any sort of threat. They collect women to sell to brothels after testing the merchandise themselves or rob cities and take hostages. Before, they were just a pathetic campsite practically. Power came when a new leader was appointed. And now. . .?" I leaned forward a bit.

"The mirror."

"The mirror? Is that all?" I felt angry that after all this trouble, she didn't have any useful information. Now who was beating around the bush?

"No. Not exactly. That mirror is like a portal. It traded souls so now Kiki is basically a ghost wandering the halls right now. All you have to do is get Akana-fucker to look into the mirror with Kiki looking in too and _your woman _is back in her proper place. Simple as that."

I turned to leave. "I'll go get the mirror and you can look into it. You're right. It is simple"

"No! You ARE an idiot! There are rules and other things you don't understand. Right now, I'm the dominant consciousness. If I look into the mirror-"

"You're soul is the one transfered out." I finished her thought. "So, just relinguish your hold on her."

"Let me finish my explaining before you totally fuck this up." No. It didn't have to be Kaji I beat. If I attacked Kiki, Kaji would also feel it. I can make that sacrifice. Kiki would have felt it any way. "First, with this circle any kind of evil force, except human scum, is trapped in here. If we just showed her the mirror in this circle, the mirror wouldn't absorb her soul. Second, do you know how many restless spirits there are wandering around this hell-hole? Who knows what spirit could take over Kiki."

"Then it's not so simple. You should have mentioned all of this earlier. And how are we going to get Kiki in on this plan? You said she was like a ghost and I have a feeling that I nor any of my men can see her."My patience was wearing thin.

"I'm mentioning it now, aren't I?You need to understand, there's a very thin line we're walking on to fix this problem. Luckily the line is slightly thicker than in most cases because Kiki is smart and has been following her body around." She grabbed air and in her hand a purple chain connected to her wrist glowed and led behind the chair. The glow surrounded nothing and then I saw Kiki for a second.

"Kiki? Is that you behind Kaji?" She looked at my face surprised. Her mouth began moving but nothing came out.

"Don't bother talking to her. You won't be able to hear her."Kiki stopped and directed her gaze to Kaji. "Think of it like this, she's in a different dimensional plane and I'm only showing you part of it." The image faded.

I sighed exasperated. "What do we need to do then? What's your brilliant idea?"

"Why do I have to think of one?"

"Because you keep failing to give me all of the information and forget a few details every now and then and I can't figure anything out. You on the other hand know all you need to know, so-"

"I'm in charge?"

"I wouldn't go that far."

"Oh too bad. Oh well, wouldn't want to push my luck much further."

"Exactly. So what does your plan need? Nothing too difficult to obtain, I hope." Kiki I may have broken down a little, but how could I with Kaji? I looked back at the book I set down on the nearby desk. _Maybe there IS a way._ I smiled and laughed a little but Kaji didn't pay any attention, but she should have. I half-listened to the suggestions she spurted, making plans of my own.

**Ta-Da. This was hard to do because I have to give up the computer soon because my cousin is here and using it. I will write next week. Review please. And no spellchecking this week. Sorry if it seems too rushed.**


	40. Plan B

Orochimaru wanted to humiliate Akana the best he could with the given situation, which he did easily. Erasing the occult symbols on the ground, he placed her body on the floor and knocked the chair over. He loosen and ruffled his clothing and put on a dissatisfied face. "What are you planning? We should help Kiki soon. She doesn't have too long or didn't I mention it?" Kaji watched Orochimaru carefully. She knew he wouldn't screw things up on purpose but still she couldn't trust him.

"I'm making plans. Now will you please lay back down the way I positioned you? And go back into the dark corners of her mind. I have a theory I'd like to test." He paused a second to let Kaji comply, before getting impatient. "Now." She gave one last stare and then she was laying on the ground and waking up as a certain annoying bitch. First her eyes fluttered open, blinking rapidly rather then staying motionless. Second her hand came to her head, holding it gently thinking that it could soothe the pain. Third she was trying to sit up.

"What happened? I don't, can't remember, I think." She was so confused, it was _delicious_. His guess was right though. All the times when Kiki was taken over by Kaji she had a difficult time remembering, so it was only logical to assume Akana would have the same reaction. "I was here with you and then I was in the chair? I think." She looked around the room for something to spark her memory. Desperation flickered through her eyes. She held her head tighter now with both hands.

"What? Don't tell me you don't remember. That won't help you. Kiki, I know you were practically a virgin still, but that was pathetic. Klutsy and good-for-nothing. Lately, I've beeen wondering 'what am I doing with you around?' " He kept a taunting tone and a sickening face on when he was smirking that damn smirk inside. He was really getting to her because she wasn't Kiki. She technically wasn't a virgin. Technically she was an accomplished, studious scientist who strived for his approval.

Akana stood up steadily, an angry blush spread across her face."I've made plenty of advances in many areas. What gives you the right to say that?" Orochimaru leaned on the back of the wall, inspecting his nails picking at the grime beneath them. He couldn't care less about her rantings. He was going to wait for silence before he continued. It honestly seemed as though he couldn't care less for Kiki's well-being either.

Silence. "Are you quite finished?" More silence. "Good. We have a mission to go on. It starts-"

"We?" The defiance in her eyes was caused by the thoughts of Kimimaro tagging along. That bastard didn't know when to die! Even after she exposed him to that strain of the tuberculosis virus, he was up and walking around like nothing happened. She had spent a long time developing it without contagious side effects.

"Yes we. Please don't interrupt. You, Kabuto, and I are to go to a shrine in Rice Country tomorrow. Actually it's not too far from my hidden village. There is something there that I must retrieve. Granted it is just a D-ranked mission a genin could perform to my liking, but I would rather take you." His index finger was bleeding. When had that happened?

"But, why?" Her body straightened itself out, unconsciously showing her heightened interest.

"The mission may be simple, but what I'm planning on getting back is very important. Come get ready for a two day trip." The trick to this order was that Otokagure was about four days away. Akana might suffer more from this, but Kiki would be in ill shape when she took back her weakened body. Akana bowed and skipped out the door. Orochimaru's nose crinkled as his mouth curved into a frown. It was so distasteful to watch Akana.

Orochimaru went into his room and packed everything he was told to have in his backpack. A few items were missing, but they were simple herbs and insence, easily obtained. They were going to the shrine because it was holy ground so bad spirits shouldn't be around. Then again his whole village could have tainted it by now. He didn't consider this possibility for long 'cause he was an optimist, despite what people think.

A jutsu didn't work out right. Rome wasn't built in a day. An attack failed completely. He found another way not to make it work. The holy ground is jacked up. Kiki dies. He kills Akana. He masterbates until he finds a different hottie to break down and fuck. Yes. He was very care-free at times.

He rechecked his items. The book. Black clothe. That was all he really needed, that and the mirror, but he was bringing stuff to bother Kiki with. Like the insence. He stole her diary and started reading it a day ago. In it, stated very boldly, were the words: **DEAR LORD I HATE INSENCE.** It also gave a short story as to why and some few other things. Skimming ahead, he saw good chapters came in around age 13. He would read a lot more after the current ordeal was over and done with. The herbs he was taking were to increase her stamina after he beat her within an inch of her life. He would still remember Kaji because he didn't forgive or forget.

A big problem was to keep Akana still long enough for the transfer to be completed. She would probably realize what was going on the second he whipped out the mirror and something was telling me she wouldn't stay still. All this was confusing him, but he would never admit it out loud. The plan to get Akana to the shrine was easy and the fundamentals were as simple as could be, but it wasn't scientific like the rest of his world. New information and new factors came in at random. Worse yet he was sure he needed a Plan B, yet he didn't know everything so he couldn't make one.

The more he thought, the more he felt an approaching migraine. He paused everything and ran his hand through his hair as an old stress-relief habit he picked up from Konoha. All thanks to Jiraiya of course. That man was born without a brain and growing up he learned to live by his groin. He believed heavily in ghosts and superstitions. Wonder what he would say now...

_"Baka! If ghosts didn't exist, explain the Village of the Swamps! They swear that all this weird stuff is going on and can't explain it!" Jiraiya stood in his face spitting as he yelled, getting more frustrated by the second. His fists pumped up and down, risking a blow to Tsunade's face._

_Orochimaru's hand combed through his hair, his face calm."Yes I heard of it. The banquet that was set up in the reserve room, the weapons room being redecorated, the carrier birds being set free. It's sounds like sabotage. The back up rations being used up, weapons gone missing are being filed down, types of communication being destroyed. Read between the lines, moron." Jiraiya screwed up up and his fist flew into Tsunade's face as was predicted._

_"That's it! YOU ARE DEAD! GET BACK HERE! STOP RUNNING AND FACE ME LIKE A MAN YOU-"_

_"Come on you flat chested girl! You're man enough for the both of us! You'll- . . . UNCLE UNCLE SOMEONE!" That should teach the imbecile. Honestly he thinking he could take on Tsunade._

Orochimaru's eyes shot open. It had been years since he thought about his old life. How odd. Moving his hand from under his chin, he caught a glimpse of his watch. Damn! Apparently he had dozed off. He stuffed his back pack with everything on the desk, not bothering to check what was what. He had things to do. He shifted before standing up. Thinking of the old. . . disturbed him. It wasn't unpleasant or happy, more like he was neutral. Still. . . He was up and moving in a matter of seconds. His head hurt.

He ran into many people, each bowing and showing their respect. Not that he really cared at that moment. His head was too filled, he shook it angrily. Thoughts, emotions were filling in. One last shake, his head was clear again. He stopped in front of Kiki's door. Wasn't he going the other way? Too late to turn away. His body moved of it's own accord. He knocked on her door, showing no hesitance. Kiki opened the door slowly, still in slutty clothes. She seemed surprised. "What do you need?"

"Get ready. We're moving out now." He voice betrayed him. He wanted to stay a while and finish left over work.

"But I thought-" She didn't stutter. She had no hint of surprise written on her face not counting the drawn out voice.

"It doesn't matter what you thought. Something came up. We need to move. NOW." His stern, unwavering voice told her not to mess around. She gave a curt nod, not showing her disapproval, and shut the door to get ready. It was then he felt it. The gentle breeze blowing softly on his hair, whispering seductively in his ear. "Kiki. . ." He breathed ragged becoming aroused without even realizing it. Cold trailing down his neck, gliding down his chest, caressing his thighs. It stopped as suddenly as it started. "Motivation was it? What a kinky girl you've become." He smiled happily, knowing she could hear him. He stayed for ... Akana to come out.

It took a while, but she did. Immediately, she was given complex instructions that kept her distracted from her room. It would be inconvenient for her to walk in with him trying to walk out with her prized mirror. He took the black clothe out of his backpack and wrapped it around the mirror, as some do during mourning. Blood. The mirror had scratched him? He shook his head. Lately he felt so off. Was it the mirror? He stopped his train of thought, redirecting it to fitting the mirror so it won't be noticed.

He left the room and it looked as if he hadn't been there at all. He then went to wherever Kabuto was, since he needed to tell him the change in plans. That was Akana's first set up. He had gotten to the door, but heard the moans of his right-hand man. They weren't of pain either. He stared through a narrow crack in the doorway and watched Akana and Kabuto fool around. He was getting pissed because he was fooling around with Kiki's body, his property! "I hope I'm not interrupting anything." I walked in casually, ignoring there current state. "We have no time for this. We need to move now. Come now Kabuto, don't let the wench pull you down."

"Hai. Gomenasai, I wasn't aware of the changed schedule." He ducked his head as he bowed, so it was impossible to see his face. Then he poofed away, leaving me alone with _her_. She was staring at me oddly. She knew something was up. She knew she was in trouble. She knew how dangerous defying me would be. Yet, SHE KNEW NOTHING! The empty suspicions caused by pure instinct. Ninja's, of course, are trained to follow their instinct, but it couldn't help her now. Suddenly I noticed how we were circling each other like a predator-prey thing. It was in her eyes. Her instinct told her to run. She made the movement and caught him off guard. He ran, into him. Both fell. Luckily his back pack with the mirror inside was on the ground already. It was a good thing he decided to leave it outside the lab, when he came in.

"What is-" Anger. Flashing anger and fear.

"YOU KNOW! DON'T YOU!!"Her claws extended. I doubt she knew she was tapping into Kiki's demonic side. My arm stung as it was ripped into me. We rolled around a little until I got my footing. Then I kicked her in the stomach and she flew into the cabnet behind her. I ran to the door and unsheathed my weapon; the mirror. The poor girl didn't have time to react. A shard of glass punctured her side and sll she saw was the pain. It didn't help that who-knows-what in chemical flasks had poured onto her wound. I forced her head back and put the mirror in her face. She tried to close her eyes, but the second she saw her reflection it was over.

**Kiki's POV:**

It wasn't much of a fight, mainly because she had no idea how to work my body or chakra. There were presences in the room but none I could see, only sense. I wondered if this would work. It was risky going against Kaji's advice. I could tell that because I felt the presences through their malice. If something went wrong. . . There was nothing I could do. I put my hands in front of my face.

I screamed. My side burnt worse then fire, yet it was getting so cold. The chains on my wrists tugged. Chains materialized and wrapped themselves around me. I was being pulled to my body as Akana was being pulled into the mirror. I didn't want to fight it, but I was lashing out against my will. The pain. It hurt so much that my astral body was flinching away like one would do when you've got a scrape and are trying to put anti-septic on it.

It wasn't working. My claws dug on the floor. The marks stayed and Orochimaru could see it. "Come, come. I don't have all day. No use delaying this." His hand reached over. "I can see you..." He was whispering so huskily. His hand roughly rubbed my burning side. I spasmed and my grip loosened. I didn't have a chance anymore. I screamed again and then woke up in my normal body and kept screaming. A hand came crashing over my mouth and my head bashed into the ground. Back to sleep. Before drifting off, I heard shattering glass and wood. I felt the anger directed at me before dissappating.

My eyes opened and I saw a bloodied man in the doorway. "BABSARE! BABASARE! HELP ME!"

**Sorry. This is it. Keep in mind I was sick when I wrote this chapter. And the beginning is supposed to make no sense. i think. anyway. Review. SUMMER VACATION IS THREE SCHOOL DAYS AWAY! CELEBRATE!**


	41. Just A Dream

Bloody. The man was so bloody, it didn't seem possible for him to be conscious, much less standing. His face hid in the shadows as the frantic cries concerning Babasare continued. "Babasare! He's coming. He's coming! He came for the heart filled with unrealized fear. IT HURTS!!"

"Who are you?" I shouted at him. It must have seemed so dispassionate for me to scream at a cringing man. His body stilled with him crouched down, head bent low, hands holding his ears. His body shook with silent laughter that seemed to radiate off the walls.

"Watashi? Dare watashi? Watashi wa messanjaa desu. (1)" He straightened out his entire body and for the first time stared at me, revealing his whole face. There wasn't one. _Before he had one when he came in the room didn't he? I thought, my eyes? _I reached up and clawed at my face. Clawed at the clothe holding my eyes. I could see? But I was blind!

"Tasukete! Aruhito! (2)" I clawed at my face, removing the bandages, but drawing blood. I stared at a man with a smiling face, but I still didn't recognize him. I panted, cursing myself for showing weakness, slowly calming down. "What do you want?" He cracked his neck to the side and I almost threw up. It was broken now, pieces of bone pressing against the skin, wanting freedom. He kept smiling. "Why are you doing this to me!?"

"Babasare... Watashi wa messanjaa desu." He repeated it slowly, prolonging each syllable. My frustration and panic spiked. Something wasn't right. I could feel it. Hell, I didn't need a sixth sense to figure that out. The man's head cracked again as he straightened up. I looked away to my right to avoid the gruesome scene. I let out a short screech. Black ... It couldn't possibly be liquid, it was too thick like dilluted mud. Black mud? Dripping down the I V into her blood. Another scream. I pushed it over ripping the needle out of my arm and the blood spurted forth like a geiyser (sp?) It spread and covered the floor. Then the black. Expanding. Feeding on the blood, mutating.

For a split second something was odd. A bright flash came from nowhere. From the man's mouth erupted a hazy voice. _Pupils dialated. Blood pressure rising. Bring that over here. Quickly! _It was gone as quickly as it started. But the world wasn't back to normal.

Mutating. Pooling around the man's feet. He pressed his finger gently to his lips. His eyes mocking her. They said he knew what she didn't. "Kare wa koko desu... (3)" The thing on the floor surrounded him, raising a little as if saying they would devour him. Suddenly, his chest ripped open and he turned inside out. The sludge jumped up covering him. But now it was his turn to go through a metamorphasis. It became a part of him, burrowing into his flesh, entering his body, until he wasn't a man anymore.

I stared at a decrepit man. Gray skin, bony hands, a cloak covering most of him from sight. The worst was his eyes. The eyes that glowed purple directing the attention away from the sickle in his grasp. The lights flickered and flashed off. The walls. The room. They no longer existed. No light yet I could see the swirling shadows around me. "What do you want!?" I hugged myself tightly as the chill of death entered the air.

"Your fear... you drown in it." The voice was so old and quiet. He raised the sickle in front of my face. "Dying. Repress it. Controls all... I can taste it... Deep down... Too entangled..." Purple glow from his hands trailed down the handle into the blade. He turned it to the side and had me stare into my reflection. I screamed as random thoughts and fragments whirled uncontrolably through my mind. _Left. Right. None. Existance. Memories. Everything. Falter. Dreams. Disappoint. Where? Everywhere. What? The fear. Why? The black_. And there it was. Throughout my racing mind, there the answer stood in the serenity. I gazed on and fell to my knees. _Repress. Deny. Consume._

I jumped up in bed panting. The hospital room. I was here in the room. I turned to see Orochimaru staring at me, legs crossed, finger resting on his lip. "Finally awake, I presume? This whole time you were tossing, turning, clawing, and begging. It must have been a horrible nightmare. What was it about?" _The answer._

"You bastard! You saw me suffering and you did nothing to stop it." I whispered it softly, clenching my sheets. I sighed, dropping my anger completely. I looked at him. I knew what I needed to do._ No! _It would hurt in the end. _No! _Just one last time... Maybe one last time. _STOP! _I blinked. All gone. "Are we going to the Sound soon?" His head bobbed up and down as he analyzed me. "Am I all packed?" A nod. My head hurt. I took his hand and rested it where the gash was. "Heal me?" He smirked but when the chakra poured into the wound, he frowned. He yanked his hand free, recoiling as though she was attacking.

"I didn't mean to." He stared confused at his hand. Kabuto left the room (I hadn't even noticed him there) muttering about _'what were the chemicals_?' I found it odd how it was hard to hear him at such a close range. I kissed him on the lips. When I pulled back, he resumed his smirking. He shoved me back on the bed, jumping on top. "Good thing I healed you, otherwise this wouldn't feel as good." He started with kissing down my neck to my shoulder. He tugged at the hospital gown and I pulled it off. He stopped for a second and slid off the bed with out a word.

"No. please. I want...you to be in bed with me tonight. Please." I tugged on the arm of his sleeve. I pressed my legs closer together, trying to will the burning pain away. "Please. I need this more than you realize."

I saw his cock twitch in his pants. "I wasn't really planning on leaving. You. Are. Mine. I don't need someone coming in here and seeing you exposed. From now on no one, excluding your doctors, may see you in a state." He wrapped me in the bed sheets and dragged me off to his room. "Tonight, you are mine completely." As soon as he laid me on the bed, he began to undress. He stopped to listen to my voice.

"Tonight. I think love is an odd thing to say the least and things aren't always able to be said. One last thought to keep together I suppose. I don't really expect you to understand, but that's fine as long as you listen. Tonight, I give myself fully to you. No restraint. That's the best I can explain it." I unwrapped my body and showed him myself. I was naked and it felt weird showing him my body, even though he's already seen it, and embarrassed, but as I said I will give myself up completely.

"I like the way that sounds." He moved quickly, rubbing his hands up and down my back as he sat me up on his lap. The kiss on my lips lasted a long time, but moved to my chest. His face rubbed against my breast drawing his attention to my curse mark. He bit into it and pain shot throughout my body. I screamed, knowing that what he wanted. "God, that's it, louder!" He pushed me on my back and entered me in a slow pace knowing how frustrating it was, until he stopped completely.

"No. Don't stop! I need this so bad." He began _tsk_ing me. He ran his hand through my hair. It wasn't tangled or uncombed, so he could withdraw it easily. Leaning down by my ear, he blew into it and flicked his tongue across his lips.

"Now, now. If you need it so badly take care of it yourself." I blushed and stared into his eyes waiting for the punch line. It never came because he was serious. I slid my hand hesitantly down my thigh and ran my fingers down inside me. I shiver ran down my spine. I let out a little moan. I began moving my fingers around faster, biting my lip. "No. Don't do that. I want to hear you." I panted and groaned, pressing my face into his shoulder, careful not to face him. He grabbed my hand when I cried out and pulled it to his mouth. He licked them. "I could do so much better, isn't that right?" I nodded. He smirked. He slammed so fast into me, it hurt. I pressed my legs together, but he forced them apart again with his leg. My neck became cold as his tongue dragged itself to and fro.

"Stop! That hurts!" I felt him tearing into me. His body rubbed against mine, creating a distinct smell of sweat and sex as his lust took over. I doubt he heard me. I tried to push him off me realizing how bad of an idea it was. Suddenly that when it happened. He thrust to a spot inside me that changed the surging pain to pleasure. I grasped tightly onto his arms. "Orochimaru!" He heard me call his name and rammed into the spot again and again until there was too much heat, too much fire spreading to every nerve. I didn't notice my deep throated screams and his name that I called over and over. I couldn't think straight. It became too much for my body to handle.

Not planning to get up, he laid down on top of me. He kept a strong hold on my thighs and ghosted his lips down my stomach. "Funny, I always wanted a pet dog to play with, but I never thought it would be this fun." He raised himself to his knees, motioning for me to do the same. He grabbed my waist and forced me on my hands and knees. He leaned on top of me and kissed the back of my neck. "Good dog. Bark for daddy." _Kinky bastard! _Still I heard myself 'woof'. His hand ran up my side and he squeezed my breast hard. Wet fingers rolled my nipple around, perking it up. I moaned as it aroused me. I felt his penis against me and it was barely semi-erect.

"Enough. I'm tired right now. Maybe later." I laid down on the bed in hopes of going to sleep. His nails dug deeply into parts of my back, like he was reaching into my skin, piercing my organs. He did this seven time in different places but I only felt blood drip from one wound on my arm.

"Not until I say so." Threads often used in battle, that could cut through flesh and bone wrapped around my wrists and ankles connecting to the bed posts. Blood seeped down my skin. "Do you know how beautiful you look covered in blood?" He sighed inhaling my scent. "Forever you belong to me and tonight I will make sure everyone knows that." He got up slowly without redressing. In a drawer was a senban and a bottle of black ink. He dipped the needle inside the ink and walked next to me. "Say you love me. It always sounds nice coming from your mouth."

"I love you." He sat on the bed, smiling in a dark, twisted way, leaning his head back, letting my voice flow through him. Wordlessly, he brought out the needle and set it in between her breasts. He pressed his lips to hers, but in no way could it be called a kiss. The needle dragged down, the ink stinging the newly opened wounds and mixed with the blood.

_Heart's failing!_

_We need to operate._

"I made the ink myself. It's a special mix infused with my chakra." The curves, the straight lines, the quick dashes, they all hurt the same. I stared down at his handiwork. It said his name: 大蛇丸."But that won't stop you or others, will it? No. You belong to only me now. I'll make sure of it." His cold hands wrapped themselves around my neck. They tightened. I couldn't breath or speak or move. It started to darken, but I heard more voices in the distance.

_She's waking up! Careful her blood pressure is dangerously high._

_The swelling in her skull isn't going down! We might have to drill a hole in it. _

_That's the last of the blood. No more AB negative._

_That's fine. I'm AB negative too. Lower the dosage of morphine that's way too much, especially for a patient with brain trauma. We're losing her again!_

Random words to me. I was too groggy to care. I stared at Orochimaru, smiling at me with that alluring smile. I wanted to kiss him again, even though he was killing me. The voices came back.

_You incompitent idiot! The artery needs to be clamped and the skin stitched. The blood we gave her was for nothing!_

_A blood replenishing pill?_

_No, in her condition she won't be able to swallow it. Her throat is swelling shut. Should we perform a tracheotomy?_

_Can't. The equipment has been contaminated._

_Then sterilize it! Damn it!_

"Don't you understand yet, Kiki-chan? If you did you wouldn't be here." _Repress._

I tossed my head violently. "I don't know what you're talking about!" Tears formed in my eyes.

"You know it. You already learned it, but here you stay." _Deny._

"Stop! Why are you doing this?" I faded. Pain. Couldn't breathe.

"You have to stop first. But you can't, can you?" _Consume._

I was losing feeling, except for the numbing cold, the burning in my throat.

_She's flat-lining! Shit! Change of plans. Do the trach!_

_But you said-_

_Forget what I said then and listen to what I'm saying now!_

"Why is this happening!?" I shut my eyes. It started flashing all over again. The memories. The racing thoughts. Tears slid down. "Doushite? It's not fair!"

_"Do you understand now?"_ I turned and stared at Iro-kun, nodding my head and splashing tears. He extended a hand.

"But I fell in love with him..." He blinked. I took his hand.

_"Life never was fair."_

I heard the voices clearly. There were four different ones, one belonging to Kabuto. The others sounded like doctors I heard around the base. "Finally, she's stabilizing. Kaijiro-san, go inform Orochimaru-sama." He turned to me. "Go back to sleep. Your body needs to rest." He turned in a half-circle writing down some notes. Knowing I didn't fall back to sleep, he explained. "The chemicals that dripped on you, caused some sort of reaction that cause numerous problems, especially since it got into your bloodstream. You had us worried for a while." As if he had the ability to show genuine concern.

"This whole time I was unconscious and being operated on? Wow... I must have been really hurt this time." I closed my eyes to think, even with my protesting head.

"You seem surprised, no confused. Is something wrong?"

"No, just a dream. Just a dream." It's message was sent and haunted every thought. I remembered what I needed to do, but now I knew I wasn't allowed to avoid it. "Why are my arms and legs tied up?" I looked down at my legs. It wasn't thread or wire, but rags from by bedspread. "There is a good explanation, right?"

"Yeah. You don't happen to have REM or something? You started kicking and scratching while unconscious. Do you mind me asking who Babasare is? He was one of the names you were screaming in your sleep." Kabuto unbound one arm. "Do the rest yourself, please." I did as told, rubbing at the reddened skin.

"One of the names? What was the other?" I shifted uncomfortably. The only name I remember ever calling was-

"Orochimaru-sama." He pushed his glasses up his nose as he said this, making the light reflect and hide his eyes. But I could tell by the smirk he was trying to wipe off what he was thinking. I blushed. I know why in my dream I called out his name, but how did it sound here?

"Is that so?" An akward silence ensued. I broke it with the answer he wanted to hear. I would do anything to change the subject from something this messed up. "Babasare is the demon of fear. He enters nightmares to show victims their fears and when they wake up, he feeds on it. He starts appearing to them frequently and then creates more fear so he may exist. Once the fear is relinquished or they no longer believe in him, they no longer can see him. He then moves on to find someone else."

"Hmm... And I suppose the ones who fear and can see him are mostly children? How old are you again?" He began subtle laughter, but I still heard and was angered by it. I wasn't humiliated. As a demon half breed, I have seen many odd, horrendous things that I don't expect humans to comprehend. In this day with advanced technology, war tactics, and knowledge, superstition has died out. Only a few can see the truth and they pay for it in there own way.

Before I could respond with a snappy comeback, who should walk in the door, but none other than Orochimaru himself. "How is her condition?" Kabuto walked over to Orochimaru and they began discussing things in a hushed whisper, meaning there was something I shouldn't know being said. It better not be something like 'She's dellusional.' or 'She's needs to be medicated.' Orochimaru waved his hand and Kabuto bowed before leaving. "And you. What am I going to do with you, my little jinxed woman." He walked up to me. "Today, we're going to the Sound to fix some problems. Akana was nice enough to already pack for you. Get well soon." He kissed me, well, rather tried. I turned my head to the the side. He paused and left.

**CHANGE OF SCENERY or LATER**

I stared at my room as I prepared to leave. It wasn't fair, especially now. I held my mouth as I felt vomit rise to the top of my throat. The morning sickness had started a while ago, but I had made an effort to hide this little fact. My room was emptied of all my possessions. Croatoan wasn't coming along. He would stay in this base and undergo whatever Orochimaru saw fit. I sighed. He would come with me, then that was the least I could do. Maybe outside this hell, our relationship could take root and restart. I put my hands together making many handsigns. A double of me formed. It had all my features down perfectly. I gave it half of my chakra and half of Kaji's. My shadow clones were special. They could withstand a couple of hard blows and last for days. It was a flawless jutsu. I sent my clone out the door to meet up with Orochimaru. I placed a note in the back pocket.

I turned towards me, picking it out and inspecting the folded slip. "What is this for?"

"When it's time for you to... Well when the jutsu wears down, give this to him, before going poof, okay?" She nodded in understanding. She was me so chances say she knew what it said. I hid in the closet, planning to wait for a few hours. When they left, I would find Croatoan and go somewhere far away. To a place where no one has heard of the Sannin. Where there are no ninja, nor wars breaking out. That would be nice. I sat in the closet and closed my eyes. If it's a girl, I'll name her Ao Honoo.(4) If it's a boy. . .

**Orochimaru's POV:**

The trip was quiet. And I enjoyed it. I brought Kiki, Kimimaro, Kabuto along expecting some form of chit-chat. Kiki was so social, well more so than others in the village and bases. We had to go work out some issues concerning that fool Jiraiya, the weakling Sasuke-obsessed girl, and the Kyuubi container. I heard Jiraiya was snooping around and bringing them to search for Sasuke. They need to realize he left of his own accord and has no desire to return to that pathetic village. Besides, do they think I would keep my most prized vessel in such an easy to find and infiltrate place? Fools. Sasuke right now was in a base by water country. I was going to meet up with him shortly after dealing with his 'comrades'.

I watched Kiki from the corner of my eye as we walked. She seemed fidgety and had a guilty expression on her face. "Are you curious as to why we are traveling to my village, instead of preparing to move bases?"

"No, not really. I assume it has to do with your village being in ruin or test subjects gone on a rampage." I knew something was wrong by her tone. We were past the half way mark, so I thought it would be fine to have a little detour. I turned and stopped. Her chakra was low. It could be because she came out of the hospital a little bit ago and then is exerting herself so much. Or it could be a shadow clone. I spun 'til I was facing her and punch her in the face. She flew back, hitting a rock. Blood dripped from both of her nostrils. She held her face in pain and spit up a tooth. She didn't go poof. "Gomenasai, I was getting a little even for something Kaji did earlier. Get up now, we need to get moving."

She stood unsteadily. "I would think that time in the hospital would declare us even, considering you put me there. The wounds still hurt and you battering me worse doesn't help them heal." The words were laced in something bitter. I grabbed her neck and squeezed.

"Something's not right. Tell me now or else." Meloncholy etched itself on her face. her grip on my wrist loosened considerably. Taking this as a submission, I dropped her. She stood slowly, wrenching her hands around a piece of paper.

"I never could get anything by you, could I?" She brought her arms around my neck and kissed me, pressing her entire body into mine. "I'm sorry. You can never know how much this hurts me." She gave me the letter in her hand and poofed away. I was livid that she pulled the wool over my eyes. _She better have a good explanation for this. I'm not letting this go so easily. _I began reading the note.

_I refuse to stay with you any longer. I've taken Croatoan and we're getting married. I am pregnant, but the child isn't yours. I'm sure of this because I'm too far along. It's Croatoan's. By the time you read this, I will be long gone and won't ever see you again. _

_Not ever yours, _

_Kiki_

"That bitch."

**Kimimaro's POV:**

He was so angry. He took out so many trees with one jutsu. Suddenly he calmed done and started walking again. "Kabuto, we need to hurry to the village. we need to gather men together to hunt down Kiki and Croatoan. They know too much to be allowed to live and I don't want to waste time on her." Kabuto nodded and followed him. I'm not sure I understand though. Kiki wouldn't just leave like that. She wouldn't do that to me or our master. I know her.

We arrived at the village sooner than expected. A woman greeted us. She in no way resembled Kiki except fom black hair and eyes. The trash never saw it coming. Her head rolled off and surprisingly, the Kusanagi was stainless. Every woman we came across with black hair and eyes to match was killed. At that point I wasn't sure how to react. Why should Orochimaru-sama exert such force thinking of trash like Kiki?

**Kiki's POV:**

It was nice here. The town was called Saisei (5). Ironic. It had a nearby forest, green grass, friendly people, and a large house for sale at a cheap price. It was like this was meant to be. Croatoan grasped her hand tightly. There was a small chapel at the edge of town. That was where they were heading. A holy union of two souls that would hopefully last. Kiki was going to tell Croatoan she was pregnant later on, but she could never find the right time since technically they were on the run and had to do things to lead pursuers off the trail.

Croatoan looked a little different from before, because of his ime in the dungeons, but he still was handsome. His once shining hair had dulled considerably, but was still long. Dark circles were under his eyes, showing how unpeaceful his sleeps have been. His skin was a deathly pale and smudged with dirt. His voice was a little cracked. "Nice looking place."

"Yeah. Do we need to worry about the demon pact you made?" He shook his head from side to side. Unbuttoning his shirt to expose his bruised chest, I saw an ink tattoo of a binding spell carved into him.

Kiki's appearance had changed drastically in the last town they visited. First her hair was cut short with neck-long bangs hanging at the side of her face. Second, she had new contacts that gave her one eye gray and the other one blue. Third, she got a tattoo of Anubis on her right arm. She put on boots that made her look a little taller and wore baggy clothes that made her look a little more fatter. She was safe and everything would be fine for now on_. It's not fair._

**The Dream**

_Throughout my racing mind, there the answer stood in the serenity. I gazed on and fell to my knees. I saw two different possibilties of my fear. One: I was on my back giving birth, in so much pain. Orochimaru stared at me watching this whole scene unfold. The baby was out now with Orochimaru holding him. "Congradulations, Kiki. You have created my new vessel._

_Two: I saw my son. He was older, about 15. He was drenched in blood. That look in his eyes they were Orochimaru's eyes, but worse. And I could tell it wasn't Orochimaru. "I got bored with playing with the others. Daddy said I could help him work in his labs. Can I? Can I? I already found him subjects in the village._

**Review Please. The chapter might be a tad confusing. If you don't understand it tell me so. I like this chapter. It's over 4,000 words. . .**

**1. I? Who am I? I'm the messenger.**

**2 Help me! Someone!**

**3 He's here.**

**4 Blue flame**

**5 Rebirth**


	42. A New Life

**Kiki:**

It was an interesting life she carried on from the moment she left Orochimaru. The house she bought she shared with another girl by the name of Emine. She was a pretty blonde, with long, braided hair, about 17 years old. What happened was she bought the house from Emine, but her plans fell through in the Land of Birds when some demon ghost started attacking and she had nowhere else to go. They quickly became good friends. Emine was the only woman who attended Kiki's wedding and was her trusting bridesmaid.

What brought them closest was an embarassing incident with her noticing Emine's eyes. They were a clouded blue-grey. It started like this: Emine was feeling a little sick, but still she and Kiki went to a cafe. She accidentally poured mustard instead of honey in her tea. Then she ran into a pole. "God, Emine, the way you're acting, people would think your blind."

"I am. . . Has this never come up? Sorry, Yamahara-chan." She never really mentioned her past and because the information wasn't volunteered, she didn't press for it. I knew she had some sort kekkei genkai that helped with her blindness, and I know she grew up somewhere else. I also knew that her blindness was cause by an accident in her old village. I offered once to try and heal her sight, but she turned me down.

Kiki of course didn't use her real name anymore and neither did Croatoan. The new names were Obana Yumahara and Kitotsu Himiro. And since they were getting married Yumahara would adopt the Kitotsu name, so there wasn't much need for the Obana. They had new identities and life stories and backgrounds so they would raise suspicion. Himiro was a carpenter who lived in fire country. His parents died in a war and there were no siblings or other family members around. He met Yumahara on a job making extensions to her family's house. The parents didn't approve of her marrying beneath herself, so they ran away together.

No one questioned their story and they lived in peace for a while. Orochimaru didn't need to be there to ruin everything. It started three weeks after the wedding, when Yumahara decided to tell Himiro she was pregnant.

"Cro- Himiro-kun?" Yumahara, Yuma for short, had a hard time remembering the names they gave themselves. She much liked their real names better and sometimes in private they used them. "I need to talk to you alone. Can go speak in our bedroom?" Currently, he was practicing carving stuff. The occupation of a carpenter was used because he had a past time of making stuff from wood. He was working hard to make it look like he had been doing that his entire life.

"Sure." He set down the mangled block. It looked like he was cutting it to look like a dog. Next to the wood was black paint and a thick bristly paint brush. He stood and walked in the doorway. "So what is this about? It looks important." The look on Yuma's face didn't seem close to relaxed. "Does this have to do with. . . dieser Mann? Kam er zurück oder zeigte Jäger nin wie Sie Gedanken? (1)" When they had to talk about the past and their lives from before, they spoke german, a language they both were familiar with. When asked, they said they were speaking about personal problems.

"Nr. Nicht genau. Dieses ist über mich meistens. Ich bin mit Kind. . . Es konnte nicht sein. . ." (2) It was hard to finish the thought. They could be many possibilities, worst case scenarios ran through her head first. He wouldn't except the child if it wasn't his. I leaned close to his ear and whispered, "That night you cheated on me I slept with Orochimaru. It might be his."

I wasn't sure what to make of Cr, Himiro's (the more I use the name in my head, the more I can say it out loud) reaction. First, there was none. I stayed still, not badgering him, letting the information sink in. Suddenly his eyes widened. He began sputtering incoherent words and fragments of sentences. Til finally, "I have to go for a walk. I'll be back eventually." He got up and ran out the door. I held his jacket in my hands. It was really cold outside.

**Croatoan's POV:**

A BABY! That's what she told me. Oh, and I doubt she learned this the other night! I don't want kids! I mean I can't, WHY IS GOD PICKING ON ME! Now I'm trapped in this marriage with kids. I can't be a father! I don't know what to do. If I leave, I might get caught by Orochimaru and if I stay. . . God. I need a drink. A nice cold one and then I can think straight.

He stopped in front of a bar and went inside. Oh man. A kid. And she said it might not be mine!? That would mean the kid might be a freak of nature. I might end up raising a screwed up sadistic psycho-sociopath thing. He grabbed his drink as soon as it was handed to him and downed it in one gulp.

_One dinkx maight ave been da palan, buut now I think I hads fives_. Himiro went to the bar to drown in his thoughts. Honestly, he wasn't ready for marriage, but he thought sticking with Kiki would save his life. He took another sip. "I dun rember ordin on the rox." He swished his drink in the glass forming a whirlpool. He scanned the room around him and thats when it happened.

"Hi handsome. I don't suppose you could by a lady a drink?" Dirty blond hair. Blue eyes. She wore a tight black and white dress that showed most of her legs and squeezed her visible bosom. She put her hand on his leg and smiled.

**At The House:**

I had fallen asleep waiting for Himiro to come back. I wonder if he would. The news was really shocking and probably overwhelming, especially since that first night we were together I said it was really hard for me to get pregnant. I had a lot of scaring in my falopian tubes which prevent the eggs and sperm to meet. How was I to know the first time would set me for life?

Then again the Orochimaru thing probably didn't help it much. I could probably lie and say I was raped, but I wasn't sure if I could go through with it. One thing for sure is I need to have a talk with my husband. Maybe I should get an abortion for now. . . NO! I shook the thoughts from my head. I wanted this baby so bad it was a miracle I was getting it now.

I heard the door open and slam shut. Himiro came waddling in with no shirt. "HONEY, I'M HOME!!" He was obviously drunk beyond all reasoning. The condition of marriage gives disadvantages to many women, so what happens next won't be held against him. He skipped to my side. "Come on, let's have sex."

I fought the best I could after he ignored my 'no' eight times, but me being in love with him, that wasn't much. While going easy on him, he found the opportunity to bash my head in with a lamp. I didn't go unconscious, but it hurt too much to move, so I was helpless to him raping me.

I woke up the next morning, naked, bleeding, and alone. Himiro had packed up his things and ran for it. I suppose he sobered up a bit and realized what happened. Emine somehow figured out what happened, and I tried to beg her not to file a report with the police, but she was too stubborn to listen. Luckily nothing bad happened and no attention was drawn to me.

**Quick Summary:**

Over the next few years, Kiki had new loves. The more serious relationships were with Yuzura, Kurogane, and James. Yuzura turned out to be a creepy stalker who after the break up, went psycho torturing Kiki and Emine, which scared her to no end. Sadly, the way the problem was solved was by killing him. Emine did that when he tried to hurt her. Kiki never understood how exactly, but pieced together it was her kekkei genkai at work. Emine felt horrid and held on to guilt for some time now.

Kurogane she was happy to meet up with. They married and stayed that way for seven years. They had a child named Doneko-kun, two years into their partnership . Kurogane teased Kiki about the spelling and the fact that she wrote kun on the birth certificate, but Kiki messed up only on account of her Dyslexia and being doped up on medicine. Doneko-kun's name stayed Doneko-kun. Her hair was black and her eyes red. She looked a lot like Kiki.

Kurogane left about when Doneko-kun was five. An old girlfriend tracked him down and begged to be taken back. As it turned out, he still had feelings for her. Kiki made no struggle to hold on to him. She saw how happy they were together and didn't want to ruin it.

Currently, Kiki is married with James. He has black hair stretching to his neck, black eyes and a bony face. He's tall and skinny and hot (even though some say he wasn't very). He had a questionable past, but she overlooked that. (He helped an old girlfriend bury a body. He felt guilty about it and told the police. He of course was arrested and was out on paroll.

Kiki gave birth after Croatoan left. After hours of painful labour, she produced twins. One had black hair and green eyes. She named him Iro-kun. The other, black hair, deathly pale, black eyes and strange, purple markings around the eyes. She named him Hebi-kun.

Emine was wonderful with children. She loved them and wanted one of her own, but when she first saw Hebi, she froze for a bit and didn't act as cheery as usual. She got over it, of course. They all became very close over the next fifteen years. Still they had secrets between them.

**Orochimaru:**

Whatever before gave himself control, broke. He did wild dangerous experiments on woman with Kiki's features. He would rape them and kill them slowly. Once he came to the lair drunk, but not the goofy, irrational drunk, the irrational anger drunk. He did autopsies on women who were still alive. He changed their faces to look like Kiki and mutilated the corpses.

Things started calming down, after five years, though his grudge with Kiki was still put out on women. He just had more control over himself. He redirected his anger, converting it into motive and energy.

Kimimaro had no effect. He was alive. He was well. He helped Orochimaru when needed. Most of Orochimaru's free time with Kiki had been divided into a little more time with Kimimaro and a lot more time training Sasuke. Sadly, Sasuke got the shit beat out of him on a regular basis, until he actually started to show improvement which took a long while.

It all started back up after fifteen years, when a cold trail heated up again.

**Crappy chapter I know, but this was just a fill in chapter to fill you in when I write the good chapter. More Orochimaru in the next chapter. More Kimimaro and Sasuke too. More twists and all that cool stuff. Sorry this one sucks but don't worry. **

**Emine a character from In Too Deep by Lillian Masoch. If you can just read that story and ask her not to be so mean as to stop writing, that would be great. Oh and don't be mean. Some reviewers that review here (maybe just one) reviewed on FoxDemon303's story and were mean.**

**(1) that man? did he come back or send hunter nin like you thought?**

**(2) No. not exactly. This is mostly about me. I'm with child. . . It might not be. . . **


	43. 15 Years

He stared up at the ceiling with bloodshot eyes, avoiding the intense glare of the demonic ones threatening to tear him apart. Croatoan didn't know what he did to bring him to this moment. One second, he was passing alongside the border of rice country, the next he was ambushed. It didn't take a genius to understand he had been found by Orochimaru, it was only confirmed when a nin mentioned his name. Now he was stuck in a prisoners cell, being interrigated. "Where is she?" A hissing came right by his ear. Was it the man speaking? Or was it a snake?

"Shirinai (1)!" I should have stayed married to her. I knew leaving her would lead to this. I wasn't left with much a choice after beating her up so badly. The rape I could have gotten away with. . . My answer wasn't accepted. Part of my foot snapped back and foward. I screamed both times.

"Usa shinai (2). All those years ago, she left me a note saying how she was running away with you to marry and bear your damned child. **(A/N: Remember no one here knows she had twins.)** Where is she?" His hand slid up to my leg, the grip tightening. "Last chance."

"Shir-," the leg up to his knee twisted backward," ONEGAI, SHIRINAI, HONTOO! (3) She said she didn't think the kid was mine so I left. The last place we were in was at. . .," The grip on the leg moved higher, "Saisei or Seisai or something like that!" The hand stopped, then tore his leg back around. He ignored the screaming that echoed in the room rather than savor it.

"Take him to the labs. I have been missing my experiment for some time now and I wish to catch up on my work. Chain him up for the time being. I have some business to attend to." Orochimaru stood and left. Fifteen years may have passed, but too many things have been left unsettled.

**Kiki's POV:**

"Stop that! Hebi-kun! That snake is probably poisonous!" I was still freaked out by snakes, but my son was fascinated by them. I shuddered as worry that he might be- No. It wasn't possible. I raised him to be a kind, caring boy and the lessons stuck. He did do too many dangerous things for someone his age. AND somehow he got it in his head that he wanted to train to be a ninja!

"Sheesh, Okaasan, You're being way too paranoid. Red next to yellow can kill a fellow, red next to black is a friend of Jack. That's a poem to help people tell two snake types apart. One is a California King Snake. I can't remember the name of the other one off the top of my head, but I know for a fact it isn't even close to indigenous to the area. It's odd how many nonative snakes I've seen around. I hope we won't be having a problem with invasive species." He was the splitting image of his father, just as Iro-kun was the splitting image of Iro.

Iro-kun was Iro. At least thats what I like to believe, he reincarnated himself to be close to me. _Was that why he had helped convince me leave? He always fear Orochimaru._ I shook off the worry of my old life.

Emine came outside with a smile on her face. "Oh, Yumahara-chan! Someone is inside with a present for you. I think you should come see." I smiled briefly. I knew it was James. He was the perfect man: Kind, quiet, peaceful, shy, caring. Never once has he forgotten our anniversary. Ever year he gets me the perfect present and I give him something I made by myself. It's not always the best, but he treats it like the Mona Lisa, just because he knows how hard I worked on it. I love that man. "I'm going . . . somewhere else to give you some time to yourselves.

I ran inside, searching each room. Sometimes he was easy to overlook since he mostly didn't like to be noticed. I found him in our bedroom, hands behind his back. I walked toward him, but bumped into the chest of drawers. A picture fell to the floor and shattered. I mentally cursed as I leaned to pick it up. It was a wedding picture with just me and James. "Bad omen." I muttered, I wouldn't want him to hear. He was worried so easily.

"Here let me help with that." He set down the box he was holding and kneeled on the ground to pick up the shards. I kissed his forehead and placed my hand on his cheek. He blushed and smiled modestly.

"You're starting to grow a beard."

"Anoo. . . Hai. That's okay, right?"

"Right. You can do whatever you want and I will love you the same." I kissed him again and after a brief pause we kept kissing. I trailed my hand to his crotch. He jumped at the advancement. I grabbed his shoulder and forced him to kneel infront of me again.

"Wait, not here. Not now. The kids are-"

"Outside. Come on..." He blushed and pulled me to the bed.

**Kimimaro's POV:**

It was a moment of de ja vu. The bodies, the fire, the screaming. It was just like the Village Hidden by Wolves. Orochimaru was off looking for that woman. It was harder to take down the first village. They had decent ninja. This place was filled only with civillians. I stood infront of a child wielding a kitchen knife. "D-don't come any closer! I'm warning you." He wasn't worth the effort. I put away my bone swords and walked forward. Getting my own grip on his weapon, I pushed it into his neck. Too much trash accumilated in the world.

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I managed to keep Sasuke's body this long, but no more. The regenerating jutsu I was working on wasn't working anymore. I suppose I could always rely on a transplant to keep the Sharingan. **(There's your Sasuke for this chapter) **I could barely hold on as it was, so a good upside to pillage this town. I'm sure I could find a decent host here even if no one is a ninja. Their bodies could produce chakra right?

Kiki's (or should I perhaps say Yumahara's?) house was on the outskirts of the town, close to the forest with a space of meadow separating them. I saw him there, sitting down with a snake wrapped around his wrist. He looked just like me, except for the eyes. That covered who "Hello."

The boy stirred, barely shifting his eyes to me. "Hello."That was all the acknowledgement he gave me. His finger went under the snake's head, caressing his chin.

"Snakes? You like them?" He nodded, trying to ignore me. He was annoying me but I didn't want to kill him yet. "Where is Ki- your Okaasan?"

"Why do you want to know?" Instead of him having the decency to face me while I spoke, I was thrown a suspicious glance at the mention of her real name. I wonder if he knew? Unlikely.

"I'm a friend of hers." I smiled as I saw his eyes darken with annoyance. Maybe he was like me.

"Wait a while for her to come out. She's in the house with my Otoosan. Today's their anniversary." I felt angry for some reason. A man was stepping on my territory! I paused. She would always be mine. I marked her. I teleported myself to the front door and went inside. Now I know why he said to wait. Kiki was ontop of her new husband, having sex. The man froze when he saw me, but Kiki was too far along in her orgasm to notice anything going on around her. I grabbed her by her hair and tossed her to the floor. I'd deal with the man later.

"Remember me, Kiki-koi? It's a little mean to fuck, someone, run, and forget them. Especially after bearing my child. By the way, I met him, he's not very sociable, ne?" Orochimaru's gaze traveled her body with no restrictions.

Kiki couldn't process the information fast enough so all she did was yell to James," GRAB THE KIDS AND RUN LIKE HELL!!" Jame already had his clothes on and complied. I tried to stop him but Kiki tackled me. "Why the hell can't you just leave me alone! Doushite, doushite!?" She was crying so hard. She stopped for a bit and began talking again much more composed. "Just kill me or whatever and leave them alone." It sickened me. The Kiki from before would have stood up to me and put up a fight. She had become so pathetic.

I kicked her hard in the face. "Get up now." She stood quickly fumbling repeatedly, trying to cover up her body with her arms. "You've been expecting this, ne? You should have known better than to settle down here."

"It was Croatoan, wasn't it?" She spoke slowly. "I-is he still alive?" She avoided all eye contact. I smiled. I knew how to fix her. I nodded with a sneer. Her eyes widened. "You met Hebi-kun?" I nodded. Kun? Family doesn't usually use the prefixes with each other. How odd. "Oh God. What did you do to him?"

"Cover yourself up." She did as told, wordlessly. It might have been part of the plan, but she was angering me so much, I couldn't help it. A mindless doll, doing whatever she was told. Didn't she swear never to become like that? "What is wrong with you?" She stayed still. I grabbed her hair and demanded she answer. "Well!? Answer me unless you want to be in pain!" I pulled the hair hard. It was so short, I kept coming close to losing my grip.

"I'm a mother now. I can't do dangerous things anymore if it could possibly destroy my children's lives. You're the worst danger around. Leave my family alone. Your grudge is with me, not them. Is Hebi-kun alright?" I stayed silent. "It was Hebi-kun you met, right?"

My eyes narrowed. "Is Hebi the one who looks just like me? That must have bothered Croatoan. Probably why he left. How many children do you have, exactly?" She stared down at her feet, admiring that interesting speck on her big toe. I clenched my fists. "Come on!" I dragged her out the door. I stopped when I saw_ her_. I was killing many birds with one stone today.

**Kiki's POV:**

Emine stood in the doorway with Doneko-kun on her back. Her eyes were wide and fearful with recognition. "You." One word. One meaning. Emine knew Orochimaru and by the looks of it, Orochimaru knew her. Doneko-kun was half asleep, but still more or less active. Emine tried to hold on to the squirming child, but in her state couldn't.

"Mama? Tired... Wanna go sleep." She shuffled towards me, rubbing her eyes and making an attempt to stifle a yawn. She stopped and stared, for the first time seeing what was going on. "Mama? Who that? Where Daddy?" Maternal instincts took over. I elbowed Orochimaru (it was an insult that he left his guard down) in the stomach, spun around 180 degrees clockwise, and kicked him backwards. He flew a few feet back and landed on his back. I grabbed Doneko-kun and ran. My shoulder bumped into Emine's but she stayed still.

"Come on. We have to go before-" I saw Kimimaro in the corner of my eye, along with Iro-kun, Hebi-kun, and James. Then I didn't see anything. Kimimaro is still a strong, loyal shinobi, ne?

**Kimimaro's POV:**

I knocked out everyone. I waited for Orochimaru's order to kill them. He was slowly starting getting up off the floor. I watched Kiki. She looked different, weaker. Orochimaru must have noticed that too. All the grace and dignity, that used to be embedded in her face was long worn away. The feeling of trust, empowerment, the ability to look up to her no longer existed. She mingled in perfectly with the other people in the village. She was a ghost slipping in and out of the world.

"Kimimaro-kun, help me grab them. And I need a new body. Find a decent one in the town." I did a I was told. I like to believe I not a burden to my lord, but I think I am. I can't be his vessel because I risk becoming disease-ridden again. I flinched as a man temperarily overpowered me. He would do fine. I appeared behind him and hit the back of his head.

"You should be honored. You have been chosen to be a part of something wonderful."

It took a while, but we made it before sundown. The bodies we carried were dead weight. Only twenty shinobi had accompanied us to the attack, but research was done that showed how that town was mostly ignored and they, therefore, saw no reason to train soldiers. I turned to Orochimaru. "What are you planning to do now? At least one of those children belongs to you. And-"

"And? And nothing. It doesn't concern me. I have no plans in particular, but I am going in there to talk anyway. I can be very good at winging it."

**Done! Sorry if it's not so good. I've been left uninspired. Sooo Review.**

**(1) Shirinai - I Don't know.**

**(2) Usa shinai - Don't lie**

**(3) Onegai, Shirinai, Hontoo - Please, I don't know, Really. **


	44. The Siren's Song

He stared at Hebi-kun and Hebi-kun stared back. "Hello, Hebi. Do you know who I am?" He held no sense of understanding in hi eyes, but then again his eyes weren't telling Orochimaru much. Hebi-kun sat criss-cross on the floor of a well enough furnished room, doing nothing but stare and keep his hands resting flat on his knees.

"I'll take a wild guess and say that you're my biological father. Where's my Okaasan, Imoutochan, Niisan, and Otoosan" Orochimaru smirked but was still surprised by his answer. I suppose before he was just playing dumb. The only thing particularly interesting about the ongoing conversation is Hebi refuses to show a reaction.

"How did you find that out? Did your Okaasan tell you about me? Somehow I doubted that. She didn't like me enough. She ran away with someone to start a new life. Why open old wounds?" Hebi turned his head to the side, moving his palm to hold his head up high. He completely averted my face.

"It was obvious, seeing how I look almost exactly like you. She mentioned you once, but that was only because I confronted her about knowing Kurogane-san wasn't my real Otoosan. She told me my name was given to me in remembrance to you. Mimashoo (1), your name is. . . Orochimaru, correct?" I nodded and waved my hand to encourage him to continue. "She said you were a cruel person. Anoo. . . Beautiful eyes, Silky hair, and a bunch of other stupid things. . . You were a powerful man." He concluded with a hint of admiration in his voice.

"Is that all she told you? Nothing about why you never met me or something like that?" He said no and I saw opportunity. The immortal S-class criminal sannin part she apparently left out. There was so much he didn't know and so much he wanted to. Why else would he be taking an interest in our little chat? "When your mother left me," I could tell he was surprised by that little fact, "I spent a great deal of time looking for her. I should of guessed sooner that she would purposely go to some town away from ninja and any great villages."

He was growing more confused by the second, cracking open his mask wide. "Doushite? What reason would she have to do that?" His tone was getting angry.

"Do you not know who I am? I am Orochimaru, the Otokage of this village and one of the three Sannin. I am the strongest ninja alive and I am your one true father." Hebi's face danced with his anguish from betrayal, knowing that all these years she lied to him about something like this. (Though technically she didn't lie, she just didn't bring it up) His fists clenched, stretching his pant legs. "I brought your mother here to ask her back and to know my child-"

"Children." He cut in abruptly, disturbing my storytelling mood. I hated people who interrupt me.

"What?" I was momentarily confused, until the ages dawned on me.

"Children. Iro-kun is my fraternal twin." Twins. She bore two of my children. _Two. _Him telling me this without provoketion meant he trusted him.

"And so Doneko is James' child?" I concluded, wanting to hurry off the topic of her love life. "And shouldn't it be Koneko?"

"Well since Okaasan is dyslexic, she never learned the alphabet very well. She mixed up こ (_ko) _and ど (_do)._ And her father is Kurogane. He ran off with another woman. Why did Okaasan leave?" Kurogane, Kurogane, Kuro- HIM. I remember now. He was a prisoner that she let escape. I should have known she was fucking him when I saw her let him pass. And why didn't I know she was dyslexic!

"Your mother was involved with three other men (Katsu, Kurogane, Croatoan) while she was with me. When she found out she was pregnant, she ran away with one. Well, I'm finished with my questions. Why don't we go visit your mother?" He looked deep in thought.

"No. I'd rather stay here and catch up with my Otoosan." He looked up at my face with a smile. I smirked, sat quietly down on floor next to him and ruffled his hair.

"Good boy."

**Kiki's POV:**

I woke up next to Emine in a room, not cell. It looked like a room a host would give a dear guest. Neither of us bound or gagged, but the sliding door was guarded by some kind of chakra seal. If I wasn't so out of practice, we would be long gone. There were no windows, yet there was a cold breeze.

I looked down to see how badly torn my clothes were, but saw I was wearing an elegant kimono. Purple and black with green snakes winding around my body. It showed my figure a little too well. Emine was still asleep and wore the same clothes as at the house. I blushed, realizing that to change my clothes, someone saw me naked and touched me. I sat on the bed, breathing into my hand.

"Do you think we will be killed? Orochimaru isn't the most merciful of men, but I suppose you already know that, ne Kiki-kun?" I turned my head to watch Emine still laying on the ground.

"How did you know? I tried so hard to destroy my past and it's still there." I closed my eyes. Nothing today could surprise me. I landed back in hell when I already escaped. I thought that was impossible. My love life got royally fucked again. I thought that was impossible. I wished Orochimaru would come in and slide his hand in between my legs. I thought that was impossible. Why would this be any different?

"I grew up in Germany. I moved to London later, hence the accent, but I still remember some of the language. I also at one point was sold to Orochimaru when travellling with my father," I saw her flinch at her memory," and I know he recognized me." I wanted to ask about her time with him, but I wasn't given a chance. "Y-Your children. How did you. . .acquire them?"

"What?" That question made no sense, and she said it with such vigor and uncertainty I found myself wondering what was running through her mind.

"I mean, did he ever. . . " She sat up and faced me, teeth clenched and grinding together, "Did he rape you when you were here!? If he did I'll protect you for now. I won't let him hurt my friend! I swear." I smiled. I had a good friend, but I wasn't sure how to bring up that situation. I'm not sure I'll be able to make her understand.

"I'm guessing you were raped by him? He does tend to do that. Did he get you pregnant and take your baby?" I saw that fierce expression and knew she probably did have it happen. "No. It wasn't rape. That night. . . I'm the one. I removed my clothes and his and I pulled him into the bed. It was screwed up and wrong and part of me regrets it completely. I'm sorry. I-"

I was cut off by the door opening. At first, I thought it was Orochimaru, but then I saw he was too short. Hebi-kun! "Hebi-kun! Thank God you're all right!" I ran to his side and tried to hug him. Tried, but he backed away from me into Orochimaru, who put his hands on Hebi-kun's shoulders protectively. I looked up at that bastard's face, just in time to catch that malicious grin. "Hebi-kun, come over here."

"No." I stared dumbfounded. Not only had he straight out defied me, the way he said it, was he angry with me?

"Hebi-kun, nows not the time to argue. So please listen-"

"No, I'm through listening to you, when all you say are lies or half-truths? Why didn't you tell me about him!?" He _was_ angry. I realized I was walking on dangerous ground. I had no idea what Orochimaru told him and a piece of me agreed with him. The distinct feeling that I couldn't talk my way out of this came in the form of a knot in my stomach.

"Heb-"

"I had a right to know!" He did. If I had explained everything to him earlier, we would be stuck in this situation. I felt guilty, yes, but mostly sick that Orochimaru turned my son against me.

"I know you did, but . . . he isn't a part of my old life that I'm proud of. He was a mistake!"

"And where does that leave me?"

"No! I never meant it like that! It's-" I shook my head in frustration,"Please! Let's just go and-"

"I'm not going." My mouth hung low and I couldn't move my jaw. "You heard me. I'm going to stay here with my Otoosan. He said he would train me to become a sound shinobi." He paused, obsorbing the silence." I won't change my mind." I was stunned. I was speechless. Already, Orochimaru had Hebi-kun wrapped around his finger. _If he stays I can't protect him. _

"Hebi, leave. I wish to speak to your mother alone. Just go back to your room." Hebi smiled as he nodded and left. "My, my such a good boy. Did you know he wanted to be a ninja? I'll guess you just didn't want him to learn? Pity. Such a promising boy." He was fucking with me. I know how painfully obvious it was, but I was falling for it anyhow.

"Leave him alone. Your grudge is with me not my children or my friends. Or James."

"On the contrary! They're my children! The beautiful Miss Emine belonged to me a long time ago. And James' death would hurt you."

"You bastard! Understand this! My children will never be yours! You know nothing about them!"

"I know enough to turn them against you and recruit them as soldiers." He leaned up against the wall, watching my movements.

"Hurt him and I'll kill you."

"I doubt you can. Face it. You had it coming starting from the second you left." He watched me and then attacked. At first it was just a punch in the face. Then he pinned her to the bed, holding her hands above her head. "BITCH! DOUSHITE? HUH!? YOU KISS ME, YOU MAKE LOVE WITH ME AND THEN YOU SAY YOU LOVE ME! THEN YOU LEAVE ME! TELL ME WHY! YOU SAID YOU WOULD GIVE ME WHAT YOU GAVE THEM. YOU SWORE YOU ONLY BELONGED TO ME. DAMN YOU!" He let go of me and pulled back, not before bruisingmy wrists. "It doesn't matter. Soon you'll know what it feels like to wonder why." He turned and left.

I collapsed on my knees. Gruesome images ran like a horror movie marathan in my mind. I did the one thing I could do to distract myself. Sing, but even that sounded morbid:

_It's not fair_

_I've been trapped here_

_Darkness surrounding_

_Shadows consuming_

_What have I done now?_

_Slit my wrists_

_Dug my grave_

_Put shame on my own name_

_So long abandoned_

_So long lonely_

_So far nowhere_

_So much nothing_

_Living for this fantasy_

_That I'll find a destiny_

_Lights are glowing_

_Love is near me_

_So unknowing_

_Shunning it clearly_

_People around me_

_Passing by serenely _

_So why am I_

_Waiting for them _

_Waiting for me_

_Waiting to finally see_

_Beyond this door_

_Behind this mask_

_Light will shine through_

_And let me be_

_Now I see I'm alone in the dark_

_Buried down deep_

Emine listened quietly. I had forgotten about her, which, given the situation, is an awful thing to say. "That song doesn't have a very happy ending. Or is it a poem being sung. Is that how you really think? Come on! Think silver-lining!" At the same time we sneezed and then blinked cluelessly. "Allergies?" I shrugged.

**Elsewhere**

Orochimaru was in the shower, thinking horrid, impure thoughts. The thoughts were perverse, but had a twisted side to them. He grunted out Kiki's name everytime he pictured her naked. He shivered every time he pictured her dying. He shifted his conflicted fantasies to a new subject. And thinking of Emine became easier after seeing her again. She was a good specimen.

**(1)** **Let's see. **

**Took up most of this chapter with a song, but it made it look longer. So ****HA!**** Review. Here's a small taste of whats to come: No idea!! I shall be winging it.**


	45. Payback

It was just the three of us: Orochimaru, James, and me. We were at the training grounds. "Kiki-kun, you can fix this. Kill James and everything will be fine. I won't necessarily take you back, but you can go on living here with your children and have your old position." His hand was cold and wet with blood. I couldn't see the red but I could _feel_ it as his hand lifted my face to stare back at him.

I spat in his face. "I love James more than anything. I'm not going to kill my husband because you're a bitter, self-absorbed fuck!" His eyes moved to the side as if trying to see his cheek. Seemingly unphased, Orochimaru used his hand to wipe my saliva away. His calm expression refused to change even though he was obviously angry. The snakes that emerged from his sleeve twisted twice around my neck.

As it strangled me, Orochimaru leaned in whispering with his warm breath tickling my ear. "Since when has love mattered to you? Has it ever affected your judgement?" His hand groped down to my thigh. "All I've seen your love do is weaken you. Look at you, the poor little victim." His hand moved up uncomfortably higher. "Do as I say, and I'll fix everything. You can be as you once were."

"Go to hell! Don't lecture me about weaknesses, when you're still obsessed with something that happened fifteen years ago!" It literally hurt to say that. The snake was still trying to kill me and I was using the last bit of my oxygen to talk. The rest dissapeared when I started hyperventilating, which was a terrible habit I picked up and only do when I am mortified.

The snake dissapeared, when Orochimaru stood up, though I was still gasping for air. He waited for me to stop before speaking, which I found patronizing. "I gave you a chance, but you rudely declined it. Let me just say, there can be worse things than dying." Behind him I saw James sitting on his knees, untied, but in a trance. He turned and walked over to him. A snap of his fingers and James came to life. All at once I understood.

"Stop it! Stay away from James!" I fell forward and landed on my face. Orochimaru didn't bother to look back. He kicked James in the face, causing not only James' jaw to break, but for him to fly backward and twist his ankle. James never was a shinobi, fighter, or scrapper. He never had it in him to strike another person, which is one of the reasons I loved him so much. "James! I swear I'll fix this!" I was crying now.

I could only watch helplessly as James slowly started to die. It couldn't be a quick death, no! Everytime a fatal blow was thrown, Orochimaru healed him enough to keep him alive, but in pain. Hebi-kun was nowhere around, which gave me hope that he didn't know about his father's extracurricular activities. A kunai through the gut. James screamed out, tears falling directly to the ground as he stayed akwardly bent over. I struggled with the metallic strings restraining me. Every suspicious movement I made, made them tighten by themselves.

James lay still on the ground. Blood soaked his head, but he wasn't bleeding. Why wasn't he bleeding? He should be bleeding. . . Unless his heart stopped beating. "If this is all he can take, he really is weak."

"Oh please God, no! Is he dead?" Orochimaru squatted down and put his fingers to the bruised neck before him. James' body was so mangled. It wasn't fair. All because he knew me, he befriended me, he loved me. I wanted to fix this but it was impossible, wasn't it? I dragged him in too far.

"He only passed out. What a disappointment. Oh well, it wasn't like I was having fun anyway. He was much too weak." I sighed in relief, but my happiness was cut short. James' body was propped up against Orochimaru's. His head rested between two hands: one under his chin, one at the back of his head. Orochimaru was planning to break his neck. Frantic thoughts brought last second ideas.

"Stop! Let's make a bet!" He actually stopped. His hands stayed in place but he looked at me with interest.

"What kind of bet?"

"You and me fight. Whoever can pin the other one down for ten seconds, wins. If I win. . ." I paused to think. If I didn't make the terms to something he would approve of, he would ignore the bet. He wasn't a hot-headed idiot. "Instead of killing James, I get to erase all his memories of me and let him go. If you win. . ." This time my pause was to let him fill in the blanks.

"If I win you have to fuck me in front of James and then kill him with your own hands. Strangulation, preferably so his last sight will be of you slowly murdering him. And you can't tell him it's part of the bet. Of course he would have to be conscious at the time so when you lose he gets to be alive a little longer." If I lost not only would I be in pain, but James would feel so betrayed.

_And if I win, I lose yet another love, but he'll at least be alive. _"I'll agree." Orochimaru smiled innocently and in a flash he and James were gone. I was stabbed in the back. (Whether literal or figurative I still think of it as a dirty thing to do.) I whirled around and saw Orochimaru alone with his Kusanagi unsheathed. (Would it be proper to consider Orochimaru's mouth as a sheath?) "James? Where is he now?"

"Gone from the battle field. Wouldn't want him in the way. You might kill him." He reached behind his back and I moved into a fighting stance. "Relax. I just want an exciting fight. I always found them _arousing._" He tossed a familiar belt to me. "It's yours. It has shuriken, kunai, explosion tags, thread, and soldier pills." I strapped the belt around my waist. "Go."

Kiki charged at top speed. Fist raised, she punched at an empty wall. A huge crevice broke into the side of it. She withdrew her bloodied hand and bent her head to the side. The sword whizzed by her neck, leaving her with basically a papercut and uneven hair. She spun around to kick the figure behind her, creating a cloud of smoke from the popping of the clone. Kiki quickly turned to see the sword, still in the wall, meaning it was the real thing. Orochimaru materialized out of the wall, grabbing the Kusanagi in a hurry.

He slashed her side open, putting Kiki close enough to hide an explosive tag on Orochimaru's blade. Afterward she jumped back to heal herself. Boom. She was half-healed when two hands sprung from the ground and clutched her ankles. As he rose from the gravel, he pulled Kiki's legs above her head and flung her near a lake. She managed to land on all fours. "Kokuangyou no Jutsu! (1)" The shadows quickly overruled the field, leaving an impressed Orochimaru. "Kuchiyose no Jutsu. (2)" He could hear the dog growling.

Closing his eyes, Orochimaru listened to his surroundings and tried to sense nearby chakra. He ducked down low as Inugami lunged. Swinging left, he forced a kunai to cut across his underside, causing the summon to go poof in mid-air. Now that the current threat was gone, he disspelled the genjutsu, using a large amount of chakra. His eyes widened as the darkness dissapated and allowed him to see the final hand sign Kiki made. "Suiton Suiryuudan no Jutsu. (3)" The water beast rose high, using all of the lake's water, and crashed onto Orochimaru's head, splashing water in every direction.

Kiki stared at an Orochimaru passed out among the rocking waves from the attack's water, with his mouth a gape. It poofed into a log. "Suirou no Jutsu. (4)" The water encased me without air or my belt. The ricocheting waves had washed it away. "Think thats bad? Ever hear of jutsu combinations? Chakra Kyuushuu. (5)" The breath Kiki held, was released as her energy was sapped away, to strengthen the water.

Her words went by unheard, because of the water, but he was none the less mesmerized. "Youso no Onban: Hikari." The ray of light that collected in Kiki's hand, shot upward and burnt Orochimaru's right side. His jutsu cancelled out the second he recoiled. Kiki teleported behind him and hit the back of his head. As he fell down, I jumped on top of him to pin him down. Physically, Orochimaru was stronger, but hey technically the tortoise was faster than the hare.

He tried to force me off of him, but I played a dirty trick by using his weakness against him. When he kicked I grinded my hips into his. When he tried to hit me I slid my hands under his shirt. When he tried to regurgitate the Kusanagi, I kissed him. His lips parted as I slipped my tongue inside his mouth. My fingers brushed a nipple. His back arched. "Orochimaru . . . It's been ten seconds. I win." I got off of him as fast as I could. "Take me to James."

He layed on his back for a minute before getting up which just led to staring off into nothing. His eyes looked momentarily empty. "James-" Fury. He punched my face, catching my eye. I could already feel it begin to swell. "You agreed to the deal, you have to-"

"Nuh uh uh. I believe you agreed and I attacked, therefore the agreement is void." He smirked at me as he pulled me up by the collar. "Sorry sweety." His tongue ran up my neck to my cheek.

"Orochimaru, fuck me. Right here and now. You don't mind a little mud, do you?" I untied the bow around my waist, letting my robes slide down my shoulders. "It's been so long. You've tried to substitute me with others, ne, but it didn't work. That's 'cause you want to break _me._ You want to hear_ my _screams. You want to touch _my_ body. Too bad. I'll give myself to you, but only if you let James go." He outwardly flinched at my name being mentioned. He moved to touch me. "No. James first."

"How do I know you'll follow through with your end?" His hands dropped to his sides.

"You don't. Maybe I will. Maybe I won't. Just like I can't trust you. And our past doesn't prove either one of us trustworthy. But still my demands come first. I want James out of harms way as soon as possible."

"What makes you think I want you back anyway? That's a bit full of yourself."

"I don't. I think you want to humiliate me, use me to aleviate your sexual frustrations, and kill me slowly, painfully to get revenge for fifteen years ago. You won't let it go because I humiliated you and betrayed you. You can't let a grudge like that go. You have such an anger problem." I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and nibbled on his neck. "I suppose we can start with your demands this once."

"Why the change of heart?" He grabbed my ass. Truth be told, lately exhausting my chakra has had a weird side effect. I gained empathic, telepathic powers. I think it had something to do with that miko that wandered through my village. Creepy, preachy lady.Oh well. Anyway, Orochimaru was horny and thinking perverted thoughts, I was horny. I wanted . . .

To fight it. I didn't want to go back to all those years ago where I was tempted to give in to the darkness. I slapped his hands away. "Sorry just fucking with you." I slipped my kimono back on and headed out the door. I knew he would follow and take me to James. Why shouldn't he? This is how we play our games.

**Well, some kick ass fight scenes, I think. . . REVIEW.**

**(1) Bringer of Darkness **

**(2) Summoning Jutsu**

**(3) Water Dragon Blast**

**(4) Water Prison Jutsu**

**(5) Elemental Disk: Light**

**(5) Chakra Absorption**


	46. Painful

Back in the dungeons. They didn't change at all, except for the moss on the wall looked more black rather than green. James was laying on the floor, not bleeding, but still badly wounded. A purple glow emitted from my hand, gliding over his body, while I concentrated. As the color seeped into the his flesh, that which was once was there, faded from view. When I finished, James woke up, startled. Sweat glistening, huffing his breath, he looked like he had just awoken from a nightmare. In a minute, that's all it'll be.

I rested my forehead against James. "Hey sweetie. Feeling better?" He barely nodded. "Good. Like I promised, I'm going to fix this." I kissed him. A long goodbye kiss. In that one moment he understood. When we married, I told him certain parts of my past. He didn't know my true identity and he barely was informed about Hebi's otoosan. All he really knew was most of my jutsu and I used to be a shinobi.

"Will I remember? Any of it?" I shook my head. "What if I don't want to? You can't destroy something this important, just like that!" He snapped his fingers to emphasize his point. "I don't want to forget you." We had been through so much together, but what he doesn't understand is the pain he's feeling now won't be there because he won't remember what we've been through.

I held his cheek and kissed his forehead. I placed my hands across his eyes. When I removed them, his pupils had fogged over. "Close your eyes." He complied. I wasn't exactly putting him in a trance. I was only calming him down to make this task easier. If he voiced his objection through the whole thing, I wouldn't be able to finish. "Aishiteru. No matter what, deep downin the back of your mind, know this."

I entered his mind and picked all his memories with a fine tooth comb. Anything that even mentioned Kiki will be erased. But that would leave a good five years with huge blanks. It was over after forty-seven minutes. He fell asleep immediately, his breath ragged. I layed him on the ground like he was before I came in the room. I kissed him on the lips and left. I, at least, had my memories.

Out the door, Orochimaru stood condescendingly. "And is it done?" I nodded slowly. I found myself feeling jealous of James. He won't remember or have the pain. I will. I briefly dwindled on the thought of messing with my own memories and wiping out the feelings of love. . .or Orochimaru. Yes! Make it so he doesn't exist. No more love for him or anger or anything! But then no Hebi-kun, Iro-kun, or Doneko-kun. (Keep in mind she met Kurogane through Orochimaru.)

"Just put him back . . . in the . . . town. Which you destroyed." I put my face in my hands. "Okay, okay. Drop him off at a police station in Oinari no Petto. Weirdest name ever but it seriously exists. His parol officer lives over there and shut up. Just because he made a few mistakes in his life doesn't mean he's a bad person. Jail, not, he's on parol! Meaning he was doing good!"

"Well I wasn't questioning him. I've never been to jail or prison though. Doesn't that make me a good person? Don't worry that question is rhetorical, but know this, I don't care what he did or about him at all. I'll drop him off where ever I wish to and you won't complain. I could even kill him." He was frowning.

"Chikushome! Jinkokuniike! Omae o korosu! (1)" I only clenched my fists and ran off. I ran so fast, I actually assumed I could outrun him. But it was only a matter of seconds before I was tackled to the ground. If memory serves me correctly, I had almost made it to the kitchen. I don't think my room was very far away either. _Maybe I could just. . ._I pressed my head into the floor, ignoring the pain Orochimaru caused. Something blunt was being pressed into my spine.

"I don't want to be too hard on you, so I'll just pretend you were so caught up in the moment, you forgot your place. Assuming this, I'll remind you. You are a maggot graveling in the dirt compared with me. Don't _ever_ speak down to me." He pulled on my hair to twist my head from it's position to face him. He kissed me. Almost as if to wipe away James' essence from her lips, his tongue swiped up and down. Once he pulled away, he dropped my hair. "Understand?"

"When you assume you make an ASS out of U and ME. I _will_ speak down to you if I feel like it. I _will_ _not_ keep the place you assign me. And I_ don't_ understand!" I stood up when he got off of me. "I don't understand why you always do this to me. You take my lovers, my children . . . and possibly my pets. Where is Jinta-kun and Keana-chan?" Keana was a pet demon cat. Mostly it looked like a small, furry grey and black kitten. "You know-"

The curse seal began throbbing. I fell to the ground on my back and could only grasp at the glimmering tattoo. Orochimaru climbed on top of me. "Why you ask? I thought you already figured it out? To humiliate and torture you, right?" Initially, thats what I thought, but he's not humiliating me and I can't say he was torturing me anymore so than he did before. He's not actually trying to start everything from the beginning? To make everything as it was before? _History will repeat itself. Is this why I've been having de ja vu?_

"I don't want to go back to you. It so long for me to stop thinking about you. Even then I couldn't stop because I knew this day would come where you would be back and drag people dear to me into hell. And-" He began kissing me and I'm not sure at what time my pants were removed, but they were."

"You are confusing my motives. I no longer seek a relationship with you. All I want is awesome sex. You can understand that, right?" I forced his head to my nipples to have him suck on them. My shirt was still on, but it was getting in the way. I unbuttoned his shirt. It was a purple dress shirt that didn't do his body justice. I didn't really want to have sex with anyone who left me this confused.

"Noo. Usa de (2) If it was just sex, you wouldn't kiss me or exile my boyfriends, or any of that stuff." I whispered in his ear. "You would throw me to the ground and rape me until I was broken." I pushed him away. "In an hour or so, meet me in my room. We'll get together for discussion in privacy."

"I changed your rooms around. You own your own room. It's down this way near the training area." He pointed in the opposite way I was originally heading. Oh, of course. "Better hop to it." The bastard teleported out of there, leaving me pissed off. I think he stole my panties. Kuso baka yarou! Hey. I was right near a kitchen. That meant there was a good chance I was near cooking sherry or sake. AWESOME!

**Orochimaru's POV:**

I leaned on the wall outside of the old room, and my current prison cell. I was so bored. I had finished my duties so early, I needed a _hobby_ to pass the time. Something that would amuse me for a long time. I already had something in mind, but I was concentrating to remember a few minor details to make my fun last. I reached up and shed the skin on my face. I put my hands on my hairline and ran them over every lock of my hair. It changed into short, dirty blonde hair. He blinked. His eyes stayed gold, but had no slits.

I pushed away from the wall and knocked on the door. As the door opened, I flung my arms around the answering figure. "O-okaasan! Is it really you!?" My hug was trying to be broken. She was pushing away from me, probably because she didn't trust me. "It's me! Kojiri! But I suppose you wouldn't recognize me! I'm your son! You and Orochimaru's! You are Emine, right?"

She put her hand on my face and rubbed it, but not gently or caring. "You really are a sick person. Orochimaru I can tell it's your chakra. Plus you didn't need to change your appearance. In case you forgot, I'm blind."

"I didn't change my appearance." Well, technically I didn't, kinda.

"Then that would mean, You didn't take his body, did you?" I only smiled and activated _my_ kekkei genkai. No water in the room, meaning I would have to use the water in her body. (Since he just got this body, he wasn't very good at controlling his attacks, although he would never admit it) I had to concentrate, though it was really hard when Kiki was walking by with unstable chakra. I barely took notice, though it was frustrating. "Your own son." She muttered. "I suppose you can sleep perfectly at night. It was an angry statement.

"Correct. And _I_ suppose think I have to cut this little reunion short. I have more pressing matters to attend to." I walked out the door; she didn't object, but probably because she didn't want me to stay any longer. I ran into a drunken idio- Kiki. She reeked of liquor. The legs she walked on buckled with every step.

"Ooooooooopsies! I got a wittle drunk and couldn't find my ay to my woom." She began uncontrollable giggling whines. I didn't want to fuck a drunk. Besides the possibility of her throwing up on me, that annoying hyena laugh would continue throughout the whole night. I grabbed her and walked her ( picked her up piggyback style for quick disposal) to her room. I threw her pretty hard on the bed.

"What the hell were you thinking!? You come here like, like no self respect or dignity! And-"

"Ummmss. . . I thurt I did it fur I good reason, but I don remember no more." She repositioned herself, head resting against the foot of the bed. "Oi, are you a god?"

"Nani?"

"I was wonderin 'cause of folklore. The snake god Orochi who lives at the top of the mountain. . . No, wait! You're a sex god but that would count! not. And that one where people turn into snakes when they die cause of unfullfillment or jealousy in life. When the snakes mate with humans, the kid get snake-like qualities. They say if you pray the looks normil. If I pray fur you, will you get better? What about my son?" She suddenly sobered up. "Where are my children?"

"They are with Kimimaro-kun. Safe, I assure you. If you like, I can let you see them tomorrow. I will be accompanying you, of course. I wouldn't want you to lead them astray, now. And I can't promise."

"Okey. Still alive, so scared he may still be sick?" She layed down upside right and pulled Orochimaru next to her. "First thing tomorrow. Remember." She wrapped her arms and legs around Orochimaru and fell asleep whispering, "I'll pray fur you."

**Kimimaro's POV:**

Hebi stared at me. I stared at Hebi. He blinked. He looked so much like Orochimaru. Just as Iro looked as Iro did. And just as Doneko looked like Kiki. It was odd how . . . I'm not sure how it was, but it was. I wasn't looking forward to seeing Kiki, but I knew I would eventually.

Kimimaro-kun had aged gracefully. He gained no weight, but grew a few inches. His hair was in the exact same style and if his hair was grown out you couldn't tell. In the fifteen years that passed, he had strengthened his kekkei genkai and expanded his chakra. He never got sick again or showed signs of sickness, but he always seemed a little off since his recovery. That's mainly why his body won't ever become a canidate for a vessel.

_I wonder if he is anything like Orochimaru-sama? _I blinked as Hebi spoke. "How do you know my father?"

"He is my savior." Both of us blinked. Doneko walked over to stare at me.

"Kimi-chan kawaii. (3)" She then did something weird. I think she hugged and snuggled me. It was scary. "Daisuki desu.(4)" _Help me. This is uncomfortable._

**Review. That snake folklore stuff I research is so what Orochimaru is based on!**

**(1) Son of a bitch. Go to hell. I'll kill you.**

**(2) It's a lie.**

**(3) Kimimaro is cute.**

**(4) I like you a lot.**


	47. Living the Dream

It was a dream, most likely brought on by the sake she had drank. It wasn't prophetic, at least she hoped. It felt more like a dark desire rekindling after years of being smoldering embers. Where they were she had no clue. The was no surrounding area, just a bed. It was quite dark so one mightt assume it was night, even though they could be underground. There were no sounds or smells, but the sights and sensations were _magnificent!_

It wasn't as though she asked for this to happen, but it wouldn't stop. (Not that she truly wanted it to.) His smooth even thrusts mixed with the friction of colliding skin, created a thin layer of protective heat. It was, in a way soothing. The moaning. The moaning is what she blushed and smiled at. "Oh god. I love you. I love you. Don't leave me again. Onegai." It was followed by a sweet, sincere kiss, that benevolent look in his eyes, and the innocent smile. Of course these were the triggers that screamed 'You're dreaming, no doubts about that.'

She knew she would wake up soon to the harsh reality, so she clung tighter to the fantasy. Held closer. Grew weary as everything became surreal. The last thing before fading: a memory?

_Onee-chan, why do you spend s o much time sleeping? I know you aren't lazy and you told me you weren't going to be sad! Usotsuki. (1)_ Where was this memory? So familiar. . . A blinding light stops me from seeing it clearly, but I hear! At least I have that!

_I wonder sometimes. . . The thought keeps coming back, so I entertain it. I'm trying to see if a sleep long enough will this reality become the dream? _It hurts to talk. My voice is so steady, overflowing with confidence, if anything. So why is speaking ripping me apart inside.

_They'll never come back._

I shot up in bed, panting. The room was spinning and for a second I thought I was gonna . . . AAA, bleh, aaaauuuu. I hurled on the floor the second I planted my feet. I didn't bother trying to stand because I knew I wouldn't be able to.

"The drunk is finally awake I see. And here I got the impression you died from alcohol poisoning, which would have depressed me greatly."

"So desu ne?" (2) My hands clutched the side the bed, the tips of my fingers stinging at the increasing pressure. " Sorry. Somehow I don't believe you."

"You think I the pleasure of slowly killing you taken away by alcohol taking you peacefully in your slumber? I'm afraid not." He paused to watch my misery unfold. Always the sadist, never the saint. The dream with Orochimaru came back in my mind, but I didn't blush. "May I ask why now of all times you choose to transform into a worthless drunk?"

"Did we have sex last night? I'm only asking because last night was really fuzzy and I had, if we didn't do anything, a very wet dream that I want to discredit."

He raised his eyebrow but I wasn't sure if it was I had I wet dream about him or I was ignoring his first question by answering with a question. "No. How wet exactly?"

"You gave me eight different five minute orgasms before you were done. Anyways thats why I drank so much. I knew it would be a huge turn off for you." So nonchalant. I spoke as if this was normal every day conversation. Then again, considering where we are and the present company. . .

That's when the idea hit me! It pissed him off so much when I was more of a shell, rather then the emotional woman I was. I wander what would happen if I acted like that again. I closed my eyes and took I deep breath in. Let the show begin. "My children. . . you promised." The hallowed voice was back in business.

He gritted his teeth and sneered. "Kochira desu. (3)" He grabbed my hair and pulled my in the right direction (I think). It was o peaceful and quiet. About six minutes into the walk he pushed me into the wall. "Such a sexy woman." I blinked. He began to passionately kiss me. I stood there, not kissing back, not pushing him away. He suddenly backed off, wiping his mouth off with his sleeve. My head swung to the side as he backhanded me, but I just moved my head back in place. "Lets just go now." I bobbed my head slowly.

**Hebi's POV:**

It was odd watching a little girl hit on a older, grown man. What was worse, the guy did nothing. I hope to Kami-sama he's not some pedophile. "Koneko-kun, come here and stop bothering the man. Your name was Kimimaro, correct?" He nodded. I smiled weakly. I was excited to see my real father but something didn't seem right. This whole place gave me a bad feeling. And I felt bad about what happened between me and Okaasan and she felt guilty, but didn't visit at all. That's just not like her.

A lump was crammed in the corner. Honestly, I have no idea how Iro-kun sleeps like that. Kimimaro, I could see him from the corner of my eyes, was stare at me. Spontaneously, I, Doneko-kun, and Iro-kun all sneezed at the same time. _Someone's talking about us. Is it Okaasan or Otousan? _Iro-kun rolled over and went back to sleep.

**Doneko's POV:**

_Pretty, pretty hair. Pretty, pretty mister. _Moved from Onii-chan to pretty mister again. Pockets aren't empty. OOO!! I gots chocolate! I pulled out some. "Pretty mister? Wanna share my candy?" He just stare. Oh no! Is he slow or mute? Oh! Shy mister. I go up to him and give him chocolate just in case! He staring at me more when I put candy in his hand. I pat his head to make him smile. I hope man in't sad! He just stare more. . .

I hug him!! He tense up. He no like me?

**Iro's POV:**

_Damn you cotton candy. _Iro-kun grumbled and swatted at the giant pink kangaroo. It didn't understand rejection! No meant no! Damn annoying crap. . . Actually, he was happy about his situation with the cotton candy dream. Usually they were much more grisly and gruesome.

_I was tied down to a chair and Orochimaru was hovering over me. "Poor little boy."He was crooning so sweetly, yet his eyes were so sweet. "I love your mother so much, I'm going to help you live here. The leson is don't test my patience or get in my way because this might happen to you. And don't mention this to your mother either. She could be such a killjoy."_

_He flashed a long, slender scalpel in front of my face and smiled. He kissed my forehead and licked my cheek, sending a weird sensation down my back. I stopped slouching and stared directly ahead, finding out that not only I wasn't moving of my own will, but I couldn't. "Good boy. Watch closely." He walked a little ways foreward, stopping when a light flicked on._

_There was a table centered in the light, on it, a woman with a gag on. Orochimaru leaned down to bring their foreheads together. She began wildly thrashing her head around. I could still hear the woman's screams, even if she was hindered. She spotted me and used her eyes to beg for help. 'How can I help when I'm tied down?' That man saw that and raised the scalpel to her eyes. I couldn't look away or shut my eyes._

_He stopped before it actually went into her eye, but it was so close. "Iro-kun. This isn't right. I'm being so horrible and unfair! How are you going to be able to see the show from all the over there!" He set his tool down and walked behind me, pushing the chair closer to the premature autospy about to be performed. The sound of the chair on the ground, Oh Kami-sama! Even it was screaming! "Be obidient and I'll let you help."_

_She was crying and when her eye closed to avoid seeing the advancing blade. "That Iro-kun is an example of an involuntary reaction. Truthfully, there are ways to prevent the actions from reoccuring. This is my favorite way!" Orochimaru pinched the girls eyelashes between his fingers and pulled it up. Between the eye and the eyelid, the blade slipped in, cutting into the thin skin. Blood trickled into her eyes, changing the whites into pink. "Do me a favor and take out the gag?" A kunai cut into the ropes binding me, but then both of them dissappeared. Illusions? _

_I removed the cloth from her mouth, which was difficult since she was biting down on it and screaming so much. While doing so, I noticed her, well what was left of her, eyelid trying to shut itself, but the uneven edges only came down to barely cover the pupil. "I have three more lids to go, so you go ahead and cut her clothes off. We'll be dissecting her after this." He handed me a pair of oddly angled scissors._

_I didn't want to but my body was on autopilot. This is why she told me to stay away from him. She swore to kill Orochimaru if he touched me again, so where was she? Didn't she noticed me missing for so long? Or maybe he did something to her? I began to focus my eyes on the task on hand. _

_Ashamed, I found myself blushing and turned on by the sight of a naked woman's body. But her body wasn't really that good. Obviously, she was malnourished and her breats were nonexistant. There were a two lumps, but not really noticeable. He caught me staring. He always caught the minor actions."Touch her if you want. I think that would be the least of her problems." He started laughing. "Women are so funny with their sexual desires. You can touch them and they'll moan, pant and beg for more and all the while they have that look in their eyes, screaming violation."_

_He finished withe the eyelids. I wonder how long ago? How long ago did this start? How long did he finish? How long ago did I get used to the blood-curdling screeches of pain? The scalpel he currently held was wiped clean of blood and placed onto a lit bunsun burner. "That's for later." He grabbed my hand and forced it over the prisoners curves and into her . . . area. She was crying. "Feel nice? Your. . . friend thinks so." I held no humiliation for there was no more room for it. He let me go, handing over a new scalpel, twice as shiny, twice as sharp. "Here. You get the honor of cutting her open. Start here and cut to the vagina, but shallow cuts only. We're going to skin her first."_

_The moment the metal dipped into the flesh, blood sprang up like a geiyser. "Too deep. Relieve some of the pressure." She screamed and Orochimaru finally took notice. "Iro-kun?" I stopped. "Do you know how sound is produced, more specifically how a human's voice is? Lesson two. _

_The voice box is actually called the larynx. This controls pitch and volume. The lungs help out. Now vocal cords are made of mucous membranes and are stretched across the larynx. Sound is produced when they vibrate. There are two sets of vocal cords one is false. They are only used in that annoying singing style. Metal or something? Anyway lets play a game. I'll give you one chance to find and cut the real pair. Now you want to make that cut around the trachea, below the chin. . . On second thought, I'll make the cut. You miht accidentally bust an artery._

_He cut quickly and efficiently, meaning he had experience with this before. Using his two bare fingers, he spread the gash open further. " There they are. Choose." I wanted to throw up. Her insides of the throat were moist, pink, white, and squishy like gellatin. It was filling up with blood._

_"Won't she drown on her own blood or bleed to death?" He looked at me surprised. _

_"You can talk? Huh, stronger than you look. Cut." I cut some vocal cords with out thinking. "At least I know my jutsu isn't wearing off." She screamed louder, coughing up blood. "The larynx is stopping the blood from filling the lungs by coughing. Sorry for causing your hemotysis for nothing. But let me fix that. Right his wrong." He cut the other pair of vocal cords. "Back to work on skinning her."_

_Her skin clung to her flesh. The layers cut were so thin it was hard to do precise work. To separate the skin from flesh, he forced me to use my own hand._

**BANG!**

I jolted up from the floor. Damn! My cotton candy dream was warped into a gorefest nightmare. Those dreams seemed so real, like I lived them before. Dream of the devil. I saw Orochimaru and I shrunk back. Okaasan's face was bruised and beaten, no doubt other places were hurt as well. She was still and bleeding on the floor but conscious. Conscious enough to see him attack Doneko-kun.

**Review. Oh, You'll get to finish Iro's dreams in other chapters. um... nothing left to say. . .**

**1. Liar.**

**2. Is that so?**

**3. This way.**

**Oh this chapter is about Iro remembering things that Orochimaru did to him in a past life. If you didn't figure it out. . . I am a failure as a writer.**


	48. Boredom is a Bitch

The way the blood pumped through her, it was beautiful. Being a reflexive action, her maternal instincts took over just as I planned. Bye, bye emotionless puppet! The fact that Kiki had a switch in her brain that she could flip at any time to make her like Akasuna no Sasori was seriously disturbing. Sasori was not only a painful reminder to my past dealings with the Akatsuki, but a reminder of all the treks Kabuto had to make to fool the bastard into thinking he had the upper hand. Ha! As if he could ever out do me!

Currently Kiki had me pinned against a wall, a kunai in hand, threatening to castrate me. I won't lie and say it wasn't uuncomfortable. I could feel the blade pressing into my balls and oddly enough, I sprouted an erection that rubbed against Kiki _real_ nicely. "Go-osh, You're such a fucking pervert even when you're faced with something like this."

"Go-osh?" I raised my eyebrow. "What a weird vocabulary you've acquired. I don't suppose you meant to say God?" I smile at her flinching. I laugh at her religion.

"Thou shan't take the Lord's name in vain. I became a better person while I was gone. More church going. Got all my children baptized. Took them to church everyday." She started a sawing motion into my pants. Air touched my exposed genitals. I remember one time so long ago, when she was an annoyingly preachy bitch. . . (A/N: I know you guys know which chapter I'm taking about!) "It's a very sharp kunai."

"Such a nice breeze. You wouldn't dare. I'm too good a screw to dispose of. And you're human with very real carnal desires, just like anyone else here." I paused to stare at Kiki. The memory of me catching her and _James_ in the act of intercourse. She had been left so dissatisfied. . . she hadn't had sex since than either. Her fingers were accidentally grazing my manhood. Visions of her naked, in bed with, like our first time together. And then in was white.

I think I ejaculated on her. Not sure. The second the pressure relieved itself, I doubled over. God, it felt good! How long has it been? I could make it. Now. She was doing this to me on purpose. I crawled over to her, my mind in a haze. Fuckin' hot, feelin' like a dog. I licked the cum off her hand. How experienced had she gotten over the years? I pushed my head into her stomach, making her fall on her ass. I used my teeth to unbutton and unzip her pants, but she pushed my head away. "Yamet-E!" I have a huge, skillfull tongue. She pulled my face to hers. "I'm going to fuck you up so bad." She's doing this on purpose!

"Remember when we we're in bed together and how good it felt? Remember how slick our bodies got when they rubbed together? That's never gonna happen again. It was a mistake the first time and I AM NOT planning on repeating it." Kiki stared in my eyes and tossed me aside. And then I saw them.

"So Kiki-chan, being with me was a huge mistake? You regret it and everything that bloomed from it?"

"Yes! So fuck off and leave me alone! Why is it so difficult for you to understand? I don't need you or want anything to do with you! Me and my children. . ." Wonderful. She only noticed now! Her head twisted to the side, staring at Hebi and Iro, until they ran, apologizing they were a mistake.

A harsh reality slapped me in a face. This was a repeat of 15 years ago. My village massacred, me kidnapped, me meeting Orochimaru, him trying to get me in bed, he screwing with my kids, and finally me sleeping with him. Damn this life was quite the repitition. "Orochimaru, would you leave me and my children alone if I slept with you once a week? I wouldn't see you at all and neither would my kids." Flawless. If fate was as big of a bitch as she was, I would sleep with him soon anyway.

"Seriously?" He was staring at me oddly, yet he managed to keep his smirk. The term 'arrogant bastard' came to mind.

"Sure why the hell not? My life sucks but won't get any worse this way. . ." I moved farther away from him and stared at his whole self. "But. . . yeah. . . Let's start tomorrow!" I had a hooker for an auntie once so something runsin the family. I began twitching. "Gonna go fix what you messed up."

"They're my kids. I'll deal with them later." I glared daggers at the hand that stopped me from leaving. I grabbed the wrist, smashing it as I forced it off of me. "Kowaii! Kiki-kun, play nice!" The cursemark was throbbing. I ignored it because the pain wasn't too intense.

"Another thing: stop refering to them as your children. They're not. Yeah. Your penis, sperm, **NOT** your kids." I watched them smirk on his face.

You ever have a dream come true only to have the rug pulled out from under your feet so dangling above you is the remnants of your happiness? I was at that point. I was realizing Orochimaru to be a sexmongler and always wanting to be near my kids to hold them high above my head and laughing while I jumped 1 inch too low.

Compromise? Orochimaru doesn't do that. Which left me. . . in shit creek. Deep in. Mostly 'cause talk is hella cheap. When the time came to jump into his bed the words whore, prostitute, sell out, and Orochimaru's biatch would flash in and out of my head. Fucking morals. In the closest place to hell on earth, I just had to have them. "OKAY! I wasn't serious! Ummm. . . How about. . ." I marry him, date him, bear his children. Whoops did that one all ready. "Wanna date?" A while ago he wanted what I gave the others. . .

". . . Excuse me?" He sounded unnaturally surprised. His eyes were wide, the smirk replaced by a blank line.

Seeing his reaction, I acted the opposite of how I meant to. I got embarrassed and withdrew my answer. "I said. . . that. . . I thought Kabuto might wanna date you. You shouldn't be surprised. He really acts fruity and he's like totally stalker devoted to you. And don't you wonder why he sticks around to talk to you while you're in the shower? The signs were there, you're just to self absorbed to notice." Smooth. Real smooth. "I got to go." I got up and made it half way down the hall before I realized what he had yelled out after me.

"I'll pick you up in your room in an hour."

**Kimimaro's POV:**

I wasn't quite sure or concerned with how Kabuto waas going to respond to Kiki when she dropped to her knees and begged him to hit on Orochimaru. I think her being away from here so long has made her stupid. Did she seriously think Kabuto would dare lay a hand on our lord unless he was healing him?

"Come on Kabuto! Just grab his ass or complement it once or something!"

"No. What's wrong with you?"

"I'm in a pinch. Just - please or else I'll tell him about a certain someone's fetish. . ."

"Uh! Hey, can't we just work things out? I mean-" It was messing with my hair again. I was trying my best to ignore the thing that clung to me ever since it got to this base. It wouldn't just sit still in my lap, but it did pur when I scratched it behind it's ears. What was it's name again? Doneko? I think I'll go play catch with her now. I jumped off the stool and it followed. I left but passed by Orochimaru.

"You might want to come back later. Kabuto and Kiki are getting real busy and preoccupied in there."

**Kiki's POV:**

" Now that we're compromised, just slap his ass as you're leaving a room you both occupy, or are passing by in a hall way or something. OR ELSE." He nodded furiously and went back to cleaning his scalpels. "Why do you have so many kinds of aphrodisiacs in here?"

"Why are you still in this room?"

"Can I borrow some? And a drug that wipes out my memory for a while. You know, say if I was going to be uh. . . raped, molested, or sexually harrassed, and when it was over and done with I didn't want to remember. . ."

"My Kiki, that hurts." Just my luck, ne?

**Well. Here's a new chapter. I decided I still need a pass time and when ispiration slapped me in the face, I decided to write. But the chapters won't be as long. Or as good. Or as frequently updated. Review if you want. It might affect little desicions. And thank you all who reviewed and asked me to keep going. And thank you all who reviewed and thought it was okay that I didn't wanna keep going. **


	49. Oh whose kids?

A shiver. A bounding heartbeat. Kabuto grabbing Orochimaru's ass before running like hell to somewhere far away. A typical day with Orochimaru in the room. He spun right around trying to figure out what the hell just happened. And now with my focus directed to a certain part of a certain sannin, I'd have to say. . . _awesome. _Nothing less could be said. Nice, firm, GOD! You would think he was twenty!

Shame crept in as I admired him. Though he only seemed ageless because of his unspeakable habits, it made no difference in my mind. I, aging gracefully, was still aging noticeably. Grey strands were scattered throughout my hair, giving it an odd glitter. My eyes, wrinkleless, still show how worn my body had become. Tiredsome. My usually energy was gone. Aches and pains in my body, wreaked havoc when I tried to exert myself as I did 15 years ago.

_I wonder what it would be like. . . to walk among and become a god. No more aging, fear of the time creeping towards me. To rule, control. . . No law, no limitations_. That swirling, golden gaze. I felt my body heat up as an extreme sexually impulse weakened my legs. _How would it feel? To just give in. . . _He was smirking at me. I never shifted away from his eyes but I could tell, by how those golden orbs looked.

A drop of blood. While grabbing on to the counter for support, a scalpel left out from the rushing Kabuto's cleaning frenzy had sliced into Kiki's palm. And she was thankful for it. The eye contact was broken and her senses returned. She began to understand the gravity of what she had been thinking. She even finally noticed her glowing cursemark that spread up to her lips begin to recede.

_Now I know. Don't look directly into his eyes._ My hand landed across my eyes as I held myself up on my elbows. The darkness giving my brain the okay to rest them. _Has he gotten that much stronger? Or is it I've gotten that much weaker?_ A hand encased itself around my bleeding one. "Oblivious as ever I see." He lifted it to his mouth and drank greedily, sucking out as much as he could. My hand began to sting worse, but I didn't dare look up. His eyes were on trying to lock onto mine again. To trap me.

I tried to pull my hand away, but he forced it back to his mouth. "It tastes good." He breathed. "Stop fighting it. Let it take over. You'll feel so much better." His free hand roamed my body. Underneath my shirt, his face so close to my ear. "Our date?"

"That Kabuto wants? Ummm. . . You should wait until, yeah, he's really shy and stuff. And uh, I should gO!" His fingers glided inside of me.

"I meant ours. Am I arousing you. You're quite wet." He was kissing my neck. Somehow I felt so much younger, I felt free and wreckless. His eyes. This was an aftershock of looking into his eyes for so long, I could feel it. I was panting now. I open my eyes. And I saw his. I moved my tongue to try to lick him, his tongue crept out instead. There was no lip contact, just tongues battling about. His would win of course.

"I- I wish. . . I could go back. I should have never left." I moved my hands on his hips, slipping them into the pants. I grabbed his ass hard. Mine. No one else could touch anymore. My eyes wouldn't leave his. I was trapped. I traveled further down his legs. I snapped. He blinked. I moved my hands to my side. "My kids? Where is Hebi? Or Iro? I know I saw Doneko leave with Kimimaro-kun. . ."

He sneered. Was it for the eye contact failing again? "_Our._ Our!" His hand shot out, hooking onto my neck. He lifted me off the ground while I flopped around helplessly. "What the fuck is so hard about saying _our!?_" His grip tightened. I understood why he was mad. Denying him the children, denies him the night we slept together. And that hits his ego. "Say it right or else I'll collapse your entire throat in." His grip was painful. His face contorted with anger. And he was beautiful. The long, silky hair and his natural mascara and pale like a geisha. What's worse I envisioned him in chibi mode. . . O.O

"Fuck. You. _My_ children are where?"

"Why do you insist on doing this? Bring up the kids when you get in the mood?" He ignored my emphasized my. I turned to face him completely. To tell him off. To take back the little dignity I had left, and his kissed me. Nothing fancy. Just his lips over mine. He pulled away slowly, arms AROUND MY NECK. " We had a date. Our kids are with . . . heh, let's just say they're safe. Come now. Don't dawdle."

He almost sounded human. Almost. He must of really wanted me. That'll feed my ego. For the first time I noticed what he was wearing: black pants, dark purple, collared shirt, and a black tie. And his hair was in a ponytail. It just looked plain weird. I looked at what I wore, again feeling belittled. Sweats. Great. I took a deep breath, gathered my thoughts of ou-my children, and sent them to them far corners of my mind. And so the date would commense, _unless the eight plagues wipe out this place and send this sinner to hell. _Nothing happened. Aww man!

Our food? Sushi. Kinda simple, but delicious. Our location? His bed. Yeah, can't make his intentions any clearer than that. I looked up at him from the corner of my eyes and he was staring at me from the corner of his. Yes. Tis an akward date. Conversation? He held it up with discussions of jutsus, torture methods, his dealings in rice country, and how my hips widen, hair grayed, and basically it sounded like he was calling me Onibaba!

"I GET IT I'M AGING! LET IT GO!!"

"Want to know what I don't understand?" I shook my head venomously. He smirked at me. My opinions and thoughts still didn't matter even after all this? Dumbass. "You are selfconscious about your age, ne?"

"Stupid question."

"So desu ne? Well I was just wondering why you keep that genjutsu up to make you age. Let me guess, it's triggered when you leave your house? You wanted people in the village to think you normal? Well there's only me here now, so why don't you fix it?"

I turned away embarassed. Truth is. . . I might have messed up and don't know how to reverse it. Like I would tell him that! "I don't want to! I hate my demon side with as much of a passion that you have with your immortality thing. I want the normalicy to age and die like everyone else. I don't want them to know what I am so I try my best to fit in and I won't let it go so easily."

"Sokka." He was staring at me with the most condescendig eyes. "So you forgot how to disspel it or you never knew?" What does he no anyway, "Perverted bastard." Did I think that or say it out loud? "Perverted am I?" Out loud.

"Yeah, I think you're worse than that . . . Jiraiya guy! And thats saying something!" I got a feeling he knew the guy cause he looked at me strangely.

"Jiraiya?" Hardening gaze. A struck a nerve, but it wasn't the right note.

"Yeah Jiraiya! He was some old coot who came by and did 'research' for a book of his!" I frowned at the memory. "I looked in his latest book that happened be out after he left and I was in th frickin' thing! I mean! How dare he-"

"How dare he look at whats mine!" Orochimaru jumped ontop of me, spilling over our food. He got a good grip on my arms and continued to yell at me. "What did you let him see? What did you let him touch? How good a fuck was he, HUH!?" He was mad about a peeping tom seeing me in the baths and yet he puts the blame on me. Where's the justice? "Answer me!"

"No! He peeped on me in the baths! God! I knew this was a bad idea but since Kaji won't back me up anymore. . . I'm going!"

"No you're not! You're staying here! The mood might have been ruined for you, but I still need satisfied." His began sloppily ripping off his shirt. I tried to bite back my tongue, but some things need to be said.

"Daikirai! I wish I never met you! I wish my childrens' father was Croatoan even if he was horrid. Go away, go away! Why can't you just go away!?"

"Too bad." He stopped his movements. "They ARE my children. You DID meet me. And Croatoan IS dead." He began muttering to himself. "Everyone you meet comes to misfortune. They die. They're tortured. They're betrayed. My children. Oh my children. Took them all away. . ."

"I wouldn't leave them with you no matter what. You would kill them, experiment on them, torture them. . ."

"I WANTED THAT BABY! I WANTED IT AND YOU TOOK IT AWAY! IT WAS OURS! I WOULDN'T HAD LAYED A FINGER ON IT! AND I WANT ANOTHER ONE." His voice cracked as he calmed down. "One you won't take away." I looked up at him, not in amazement or shock, but in sadness and regret.

"They would have ended up like you." It was quiet now. He slid off of me on to his side of the bed and layed down to stare up at the ceiling. I curled up in a ball and moved my body to look away from him. It was a while before anyone decided to talk. Each of us left each other to ourselves to dwell within our own minds, however lonely and empty they were.

I decided to end it. "I like showers." He stayed silent. "It's like rain you can control. It feels so relaxing to let cold water pelt against your skin. To let the water wash away the worries and troubles if only for a little bit."

"Baka. Water. Thats all it is. All it does is wash away the dirt and grime thats built up."

"Huh. You're so busy annoyed or angery, you miss the small things that are so wonderful." I heard him whisper something nasty under his breath. I sat up slowly. "Well then, it seems like I'll just have to show you." I grabbed his hand and yanked him up. He had a joining bathroom with a shower somewhere.

"Not that-" I rammed us inside a broom closet. There was another door. I pointed. "That's the bath-" I pulled him inside even though he resisted. Managing a miracle, I forced him in the tub and turned on the shower head. It made him really mad. "Let go of-" Our clothes clung to our skin. His hair was matted together in wet clumps. I could feel it as I pushed on the back of his head and made him kiss me. I moved away slowly.

"Stay for me?" He stayed but wore a scowl stating: you didn't win i just have a liable excuse up my ass somewhere. "How strong are you?"He glared at me like I was retarded or something. "I mean how much weight can you hold."

"Quite a bit." His eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Naze?" I smiled. It was hard to take clothing off when you're wet, but somehow I did it easily. He gazed at my body in wonder.

"Will you be able to hold me up the whole time we make love?" He pushed me away.

"Naze! Wakarinai. I-" I advanced, pressing my fingers to his lips.

"Baka, never try to understand a woman, it'll hurt even you're mind. Especially trying to figure me out. I haven't gotten around to figuring me out either." He smirked. I had the upper hand here and yet he still smirked. I took his pants and boxers off togther. It was easier. I leaned forward kissing his collar bone. "Be gentle. . ." I don't expect him to understand.

He fell to his knees at first and licked his way down my body. His thumb swiped at my nipple. It was soft but erect because of the water. His hands caressed up and down my sides. His head slid down between my legs, rubbing his cheek on my smooth skin. He bit into it, taking care to suck out the blood. I spread my legs open wider. "Please even if it's just a little." I moaned his name as his wet tongue prodded around my womanhood in a circular motion. He withdrew quickly and stood up.

"Let's see how long I can hold you." My arms wrapped around his neck, my legs, his waist. He thrust inside of me, bashing against the wall behind me and I screamed in pain. It hurt the way he did it. I groaned as he began playing with my breast. His bit into the fleshy part and tugged softly while his tongue wrapped around my tit. I leaned back trying to escape the feeling. He began fast rythmic thrusts inside me, penetrating deeper and deeper until he kept hit that one spot that drove me wild. I clawed, I bit, I screamed his name over and over.

Then he orgasmed and I didn't. He pulled out of me. "Sorry love, I take care of my needs first." He at least had the decency to use his tongue to finish me off. _Harder, faster. Oh God don't stop. Keep going._ I begged him so many ways I felt pathetic. The static surged up my body setting me on fire. The cold water wasn't helping. We stopped after a few minutes.

We layed at the bottom of the tub naked, water splashing us and washing everything away. "You're not allowed to leave again."

"Yeah, yeah.


	50. One Door Closed,One Broken Window Opened

**A/N: I started to make AMVs! YaY! Be nice and check them out.**

youtube . com/watch? v (equal) FO-spkCZvvk or They Might Lose It (ayakashi)

youtube . com/watch? v (equal) xyNlEzPoynQ or Hinamizawa's Sickness (when they cry)

youtube . com/watch? v (equal) d2oLItRjbwA or Governments Corruption (fma)

**Onto the story!**

Things went downhill ever since that one damn night. I should've knew that since, I just should've known. I still saw Orochimaru when he was horny or overloaded with work and needed my assistance. Which lead to him being horny. My . . . our kids I barely saw. They were going through some special training program that I didn't trust but had no say in.

On the plus side? My genjutsu gone. And behind Orochimaru's back I've started dating the servant girl. Yes girl. Since men have screwed me over so much, I've decided on taking a little break from them. Nothing too serious. Except for the fact Orochimaru turned me gay. Which does concern me. Actually I'm with her right now. . .

She was really nice and shy. Almost like that woman I came here with. . . The bastard did something so I can't remember her much. . . We were just kissing right now, but we just finished an interesting conversation on herbs and poisons over a nice dinner. One thing I liked about her, she talked just for fun. And she listened to what I had to say. Orochimaru would never do that. STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM AT A TIME LIKE THIS! Footsteps? I broke away. "Is it him?" I nodded. She moved away and grabbed the tray and began to leave. "I wish you would stop seeing him. I wish you could just leave this place." She was gone replaced by a snake.

Like I had a choice to leave him. Last time I left, he tracked me down after 15 years and forced me back. Her suggestion, I wish I could to. Speaking of her, why was he watching her leave so susiciously!? "Somethings funny with her. She won't look me in the eye. She avoids me completely. She acts paranoid. I think she's the one giving Konoha inside information."

"Nah. I got drunk one night and told her how kinky you were in bed without sparing details. She was so innocent. . . So what did you need?" He stared at me a while before shrugging. I was slightly surprised that so willingly accepted that answer. He usually could pick up on my lies. I must be getting better at telling them or something.

"Tired. This is my room too last time I checked. I'm just going to turn in a little early." Shirt gone. Pants off. He laid down on the bed with only boxers, falling asleep immediately. I walked over to him and watched him. His chest rose and fell in a peacefully pattern. Such a beautiful body, even if it's not his own. Sometimes I wonder if we had meant differently, what would it be like?

I rested my head on over his heart and listened to the rthym. "Hard to believe a monster like you has a heart or soul." I laughed softly. "They must be completely black by now. Poor bastard." I stood up and left to find my kids.

"Kabuto? Where are my kids?"

"Can't tell you. You know that by now right?"

"Please just tell me! I won't tell! I'll even give you a naked picture of Orochimaru chained to the ceiling! . . . OR A COPY OF ONE! That's good enough right? Anything!" I saw his questioning look and sighed. "Can you at least tell me if they're okay? Are they all alive?"

"Yes."

Then why can't I see them!"

"Orochimaru-sama gave strict orders. Just because you fuck him every day, doesn't make you special! He only fancies you more then the others around here because you're so damned hard to break." Kabuto turned away and began organizing medicine in his drawers and cupboards. His words still echoed in my mind._ I'm just the one he likes the most?_ _Does that mean he's been cheating on me or he used to sleep around a lot._ I was hoping for the latter. It still burdened my mind as I walked to my room to get stuff to sleep in another room. In secret of course.

I walked in quietly for apparently no reason. "How am I such a poor bastard?"

"You were awake? I thought you wanted to sleep."

"Actually I wanted to see what room you sneak off to to sleep when I go down for the count." I should have figured it wouldn't get passed him. Nothing ever does.

"I want to see my kids." I ignored his question completely. I was for once gonna get what I wanted. Fuck Orochimaru! I fingered something in my pocket, preparing for whats to come.

"No." He stared nonchalantly at his hair.

I brought the knife out. "Fine." An amused smirk crossed his face as he sat up.

"Planning to kill me? Go ahead."

"I plan to get the fuck away from you and see my kids in another life."He watched in amazement as I stabbed myself in the stomach. Repeatedly. I kept going until I couldn't move. Orochimaru rushed for Kabuto. Injuries to my extent, needed serious treatment. By now he better realize I'm serious. And if I die. . . I am _really_ praying on that whole next life thing. It would kinda suck to start over but hey at least there's an option there.

I woke up in a hospital room. "Figures I wasn't going die. Why do all my suicide attempts get screwed up? Oh well. If I did die, I would damn my immortal soul anyway." I was kicked sharply in the side and thrown into the drawers. It was an angry guess who. "I want to see my kids."

"You'll never be seeing them again, you ungrateful little whore! I give you ever thing in my power and yet you still act like a worthless bitch!" He hissed vehemently. "The fling you had with the servant girl, I handled well enough. I even gave you chances to admit your infidelities. The refusing me from time to time I stayed silent about. But this!" I was kicked in the stomach. "You like that feeling huh? How bout this? Or this?"

Kabuto walked in and began the diagnosis. The full one. Which I was praying he wouldn't do. Orochimaru would be pissed. . . "Well she'll make it fine. Her baby she hit dead on so it's well dead. Died on the first stab. Her uterus is completely torn up so I had to remove it which means no more children." What betrayed me most was my calm face. Yes. I did it all on purpose. I knew I was pregnant. I realized if this one died, I would only get pregnant again, so I took care of that. "For future references, don't fix things yourself. Please come to the doctors."

"Then you would wait for Orochimaru's approval like a little lapdog. Personally, I see you as a shnouzer."

"Kabuto. Leave now." He bowed respectfully and high-tailed it out the door. He turned towards me. "Why?" It was a simple question drenched in anger that was well-hidden.

"I wasn't letting you take this baby from me or any others I might have."

He was silent for a moment. "Hayashi. . . Get the fuck out of my village."

"Not without-"

"Your children? Take them. They're in the sparring room." He called them mine. . . He called me Hayashi. He must have completely detached himself from us. I smiled happily. For once, he was doing something nice. I should have questioned it though. I should have thought more. I should have known some things were too good to be true.

Twenty minutes after I left, Orochimaru summoned Dark in front of him. "Kiki took her children and escaped. Bring her back but kill her children." Dark almost left but Orochimaru wasn't finished. "Kill them in front of her."

**Check out my Supernatural fanfic. If you like the show. I started a second one to work on. Right now only the prologue is up but thats okay. I know this chapter was kinda predictable. So, sorry. Review. Like the cliffie though?**


	51. Dear God

Blood. So much blood. Too much blood. There shouldn't be any blood. And it wasn't her blood, hell, she wasn't even injured. _Then whose is it? _She was laying on the ground, frozen. Looming over her was a figure of a familiar looking boy. _Oh God._ 15 years ago she had run into him in Orochimaru's layer. _He was sitting so helplessly in the hallway._ Dark. _He was planning to kill me for the hell of it. _The mercenary. "_Did you really think you could escape _Orochimaru_? You should have learned by now, he'll just track you down and drag you back. _Yes I should have. But still I was stupidly in love with him and helpless. I kept thinking the best of him. But that didn't exist, now did it? _"I'm going to make your life a living hell."_ How can you? You can't make things very much worse can you?

Blood. So much blood. Too much blood. It wasn't her blood, yet it still belonged to her. _Oh God. NO!_ Barely, just barely she could make out what was behind him. _Dear Lord._ Three bloody messes. Each alive. They were conscious, but not lucid. Doneko-kun. Her arm was twisted backwards and out of it's socket. Her spine had been snapped in the middle. _Do you feel any pain? Is all numb now? _Iro-kun, desperately and futilely, he tried to push and hold his intestines back into his stomach._ No one's face should be contorted so. It's wrong for any mother to see this._ And Hebi. He wouldn't stay down. Jesus, he kept hobbling to his feet, only to be beat back down. Again and again they tried, but it was no use. They may already be considered dead. _Dear Lord! Stay down!_

_Stop! Please! I'll go back now. I'll never betray him again! Just please. . ._ No words came. She was paralyzed, sitting with her mouth widely ajar in her stupor. It took a moment but a high pitched squeal squirmed it's way out, but it barely even audible to her. Wildly her fingers clenched, clawing at the earth her, drawing in the mud. She sat a minute, befuddled with the fact, she didn't remember how any of this came to pass. She couldn't remember being attacked, sensing Dark's presence, or seeing her children being mutilated. That wasn't something you can just easily forget. Such an image would automatically burn it's picture in your mind and haunt you, whenever you chose to think about you're children. So why?

It was a slap in the face, the way the answer came. Her voice sounded out begining with a snort, followed by fits of uncontrollable laughter. No one bother to look her way, because no one seemed to take notice. And why should they? In the future Kiki did nothing but stay paralyzed by some jutsu or other. Her laughing continued rhythmatically. She pick up a stray kunai and turned it around in her hand, smiling. She rammed as fast as she could into her chest, slicing through her heart. The beating began to slow as the blood slowly started trickling out of the wound. Removing the knife would surely speed the whole process up and let the blood flow faster, but she was simply to tired and weak to yank it out. She sat there smiling and singing about the Sakura trees she once knew so fondly. Her voice gradually began fading. _I've certainly lost it haven't I?_

**With Orochimaru**

He stood quietly in his lab, swishing around the red liquid in the vial, trying to observe some sort of reaction. It was Kiki's blood sloshing from side to side in that test tube and what he was trying to do was see how her blood reacted to another person's. His brows furrowed in frustration. Honestly, if had been thinking with a clear mind, he would be making these observations under a microscope and writing down everything in his handy dandy . . . notebook (If that makes Orochimaru sound too gay for your tastes, replace it will little, leather.) But alas his mind was wandering somewhere else.

_Ah. AH! Orochimaru! Faster. Please God._

He wiped his head with his hand trying to clear his mind. It wasn't working to well. The darkness, however brief, that movement caused, brought vivd pictures to mind.

_Please Orochimaru. I've gotten so wet down there. I'm so close. Hah. Oh. AHH!_

He tossed what he held in his hands on the floor and gripped the table in front of him, letting the arousal take over. The memories kept resurfacing. He could stop them.

_Kiki sat in his lap moving up and down on Orochimaru's length. Her arms wrapped around Orochimaru's back and her face hid in his neck. She moaned by his ear. But she was moving so slowly as if to tease and antagonize him. "Stop teasing."_

_"Then you fuck me as fast and hard as you want." She stood up, not bothering to hide her body and sat on the bed, legs spread out wide. He stayed still. "What's wrong?" She licked her fingers and began with out him. Her fingers moved in a circular motion, gradually picking up speed. "If you don't hurry, I'll cum with out you. . ." Orochimaru was by her side in a second, forcing her fingers away from her womanhood._

_He hopped on top of her shoved himself deep inside of her. He groaned at the friction. She was wet. So wet, it was lubricating his cock. He pumped himslef in and out as far as he could go. Kiki was biting his nipples since they suddenly perked up. Her hands groped his ass, squeezing tightly. Orochimaru massaged her breast. Kiki blush and turned away. "Why is your pussy so tight today Kiki-chan? Have I been ignoring you that much?" Her hips began moving towards Orochimaru's. Halfway in air, their hips met and brushed against each other._

_As Kiki orgasmed, she clenched her lover's hair, but he was far from done. He kept riding her. Every now and then he slapped her ass and slipped his fingers inside her, along side his penis. It felt good. "Fuck me harder! Please it feels like I'm on fire. Don't stop. Don't ever stop! Please I love you!"_

Orochimaru doubted she remembered saying that to him. She was in the middle of her strongest orgasm and afterwards she hadn't seemed to aware of her surroundings. Like he had shot her up with dope rather than semen. It was probably some spur of the moment thing. Or she never brought it up again because his reply was nothing more than a condescending smirk.

The children. His children. Were they dead yet? Had Dark caught up t o them already? Orochimaru wasn't the most patient man in the world. When he wanted something he wanted it immediately. He had tried 'bonding' with them, except Doneko. He had no business in that territory. She wasn't his. Anyway the 'bonding' sessions seemed. . . too akward. Especially with Iro. I fucked him up in his past life real good.

It was just too much trouble, so he spent the time trying to turn them against their mother and training the hell out of them. Doneko followed Kimimaro around like a duck. I wonder if that boy realizes what a Lolita Complex is. . . Anyway she trained alongside him. She was, in my opinion, too clutzy to become a a good ninja. Though she did resemble Kiki, immensely. Maybe when she was older, they could fool around.

"Kiki, you and your children need to fuckin' die. You'rea nuisance." He punched the wall in and ignored the bleeding. "Die, die, die. Leave me alone. Disappear forever." His face was anguished.

**With Kimimaro**

The hallway in this base seemed to stretch longer than the others. It was impossible, but he may have taken a wrong turn and become lost. He would never admit it though. He had a large amount of pride, which he barely ever showed. "I am becoming trash. Orochimaru-sama will notice and be displeased." He was extremely ashamed of his carelessness even though it wasn't his fault. The building's blue prints had changed at the last minute. It was completely different from the rest of the bases. Kabuto was supposed to mention this but he turned a blind eye, figuring Kimimaro would figure it all out on his own.

He passed by an open door. The aura about the room told him it was Dark's room. Next to Dark was Emine. He was supposed to keep an eye on her because he kekkei genkai might prove troublesome. But not today. He had gone on that mission to catch Kiki and make an example out of her children. Kimimaro hoped this would teach her. Kiki was too resistant to Orochimaru-sama's generosity. In a corner of his mind, two voices spoke out. One said to ask why she kept running.

The other was, the little girl's gonna die. I suppose I became accustomed to having her hanging around, but Orochimaru-sama knows best. I offered to do the assassination but my Lord said I was too attached. I didn't get attached. I didn't.

**With Kiki**

I woke up with a start. The fading pain in my chest felt so real. Killing myself in a premonition may wake me up but the pain becomes so real. It lingers a while and I think leaves a types of mental trauma effecting my physical form. But the consequences were bearable as long as she could escape that nightmare. It was time to wake up the kids. They were going to go away for a while. "Hebi, Doneko, Iro okete ima!" They slowly roused. By that time I had already summoned Inugami. They stared at him in fear, but this needed to be done. "Inugami take them to the realm of shadows, keep them safe until I can signal you again, wakarimasu?" He nodded. I listened to them scream as the shadows enveloped them, dragging them into the shadows. "Inugami, explain some stuff to them when you know."

"Hai." He sunk into the shadows, chasing in after the three soon-to-be psychotic children. Kiki turned back and walked in the direction she came. She would at least try to defend herself against- "Hello Kiki, where you going? Orochimaru-sama misses you." He hit her in a pressure on the back of her neck. Kiki forgot to factor in Dark was a well-trained mercenary. With her guard down, in that _one_ instance, he attacked so rapidly, so precisely and accurately. She never had the chance.

Dark picked up her rigid frame and ran back to the base. From a distance he had seen her summon that beast, and have it devour her own spawns. Dark assumed, keep in mind that he was at a very far away distance and heard fearfilled screams, that Kiki developed some kind of sadistic side from the Snake and killed them off. He entertained, and then quickly dismissed, the idea that the reason she came out here was to slaughter the brats without witness. If she had, she wouldn't have risked Orochimaru's wrath, right? So why kill her kids now?

She probably figured out the plan. She was well aware of the Otokage's sadism and sense of revenge. She would rather give her kids a quick death then watch them suffer a slow one. It made enough sense, but he overlooked the fact that if she knew he was there pursuing her, why wasn't she on her guard? He dismissed the thought. She probably wasn't exactly of sound mind right now.

.

_If I close my eyes and dream a little dream_

_Will that bring the moon to me?_

_If the tides rise will it sweep me out to sea?_

_Promise you'll stay nearby_

_And protect me from drowning_

_This ocean. . . I created with my own misery_

.

Kiki's eyes fluttered open. There was a metallic taste in her mouth and she was in a dungeon. No, a secure lab. An experiment? I smiled. Was that what I was now. I couldn't wait to see him. Wasn't that just wrong? I laughed. The door knob turned and Orochimaru entered with a bandaged hand. "Kiki-kun." He showed his acknowledgement. He took a deep breath and sighed,"Would you swear to finally stop leaving if we got married?"

**Mimashoo. . . First uh when Kiki said she thought she was losing it, she meant her touch.**

**1 okete ima - wake up now.**

**And I think I asked before to go to youtube and check out my amvs and stuff. My user name there is JigokuShoujosRevenge. And someone want to leave a comment on my supernatural fanfic? Even a flme to say what I need to improve would be awesome. Flames can keep me warm. **

**And I tried very hard on this chapter. I hope you enjoy. review and read.**


	52. A Short, short Warning

Orochimaru frowned profusely at the indescribable sight before him. Never mind. He could. She was rolling on the floor laughing. _Laughing_ at his proposal. He wanted to _marry _her and she was _laughing!_ He spent hours beating himself and torturing himself, crossed between killing her and loving her. He chose to love her and she was mocking her. It made no sense. Countless times he fucked her, he was the father of the majority of her children, and worse the bitch put him through hell. She took away so much from him and got her way so often and she spent so many nights whispering with heated breath, '_I love you, Orochimaru.'_ So why? Damn it! WHY?

"I-I'm. . . soooo" She couldn't stop laughing. No! She wouldn't! "Sorry!" She burst into giggles again. She finally calmed down only to say in a sad voice, "I will never marry you."

I didn't hear it. I _felt _it. The change. The anger rising passed the safety point. He snapped. The sadistic side he had forced down so long to get closer to Kiki. . . And here it was resurfaced. "Ki-Ki-Chan" He drew out her name in a sickly sweet voice and with that voice Kiki froze, understanding the tone. His hand moved quickly under her chin, caressing her neck, before crushing it. He raised her up to meet eye to eye. Oh, how arousing that was. Staring calmly into those eyes he saw the fear, the worry, the knowledge of what was coming. He kissed her collar bone. "You taste exsquisite as always. And that scent, intoxicating. My dear Kiki-chan, what should I ever do with you?"

"Let me go." She spoke with strained breath. It came out in rasps as she futilely attempted to lessen my grip. Her hand grasping my wrist so limply. Pathetic.

"I don't think so my sweet. You've become so weak. . . I fully blame myself." I grabbed her thigh and raised it to surround my hip. I licked at her reddened cheek. "I fix that. I'll fix everything and make it like it should've been in the beginning." I had an erection, caused by staring into those widening eyes. I nuzzled her ear and then threw her to the floor. "Let's fuck."

**_VERY SHORT CHAPTER I KNOW! BUT I JUST WANNA SAY I'LL BE EDITING SOME OF THE CHAPTERS UP AND STUFF SO YEAH . . . TIL NEXT TIME._**


	53. Woah I updated!

The more she struggled, the more I wanted her. The more she cried the thirstier I became. Shivers rippled down my back as her struggling, knocked her leg in an odd pattern against my erection. I bit her neck, letting the curse mark activate. Once she screamed, I forced my hand down her throat to keep it open. I mounted her properly and grasped wildly at her hair to keep her head steadier. I moved my hand away and forced my tongue down her throat. She tasted like papaya. I didn't want to talk to her. I just wanted action.

I stood and discarded my pants before moving to straddle her chest. I grabbed her jaw and forced her mouth open. She never gave me a mouth job. "Suck. Try to bite down, I'll ssssummon snakessss to choke the breath away from you." I forced me into her mouth. I sudden burst of ectasy as teeth scraped softly down my length. A tounge pressed against the head, trying to push me out. I hissed. I could only fit so far inside her mouth. Grabbing the exposed flesh of my arousal, I jerked my self off, occasionally stopping to massage my balls, to make sure they weren't neglected.

I almost emptied my load down her mouth, but no. I wanted to be completely inside her. I pulled out. "Are you gonna take the clothes off yourself or should I?" She rolled over and tried crawl away, clenching her jaw. I pulled her back with ease and slid her pants off, then her shirt. I fondled her breasts harshly to listen to her low whimper. I nibbled up her neck, reaching her ear. I swiped my tounge around for a test run. Then I bit down. She struggled by pushing me away. I plunged inside of her without warning, as deep as I could go. She screamed a strangled screech. I did it again and again. I added my fingers and moved in circular motions until i forced them to fit between her warmth and my cock. Nails ripped down her back as she bit and hit back as a retaliation. It only turned me own more. To struggle. To defy me. To show _any _kind of strength.

She wasn't crying anymore. She refused to scream. And she refused to lie down and be taken by me. She formed hand seals but I was to sluggish due to my already exerted force. She caught my arm and hair on fire. "My, my when did we learn such powerful fire jutsu?" I wanted her to fight me. I wanted her to lose, be bleeding and broken. I wanted her to lean up and kiss me, cuddle closely, and spread her legs. I wanted a lot.

She grabbed a scalpel. "_Tsk. Tsk._ Kiki-chan I love you. I offer myself to you. You try to kill me. My, my our relationship does have many quirks." She spit at me. It landed on my bare foot. I shook in away, repulsed that she actually dare do that. "I've let too many things slide. Too soft on you." I was muttering to myself, but with that look, no _fire_, in her eye, I assume she heard.

"How is being a confused, game-playing, mindcontrolling freak being too soft on me?" She wrinkled her nose in disgust. But I smiled. She wasn't as submissive as she was when she got here, which was a relief.

"I love you."

"You're PMSing too much today." I frowned. Was she implying I looked or acted feminine?! Nonsense. "You're too fuckin' girly." I pushed it aside. She ran low of her energy and now was putting all her energy in childish taunting. I for one wouldn't fall for it.

"Why not say 'I love you' back? I know you do." She breathed deep. I took this chance to attack. She dogded and backed away more. There would be more opportunities if I could throw her off her guard with only my words.

"You rape me. Killed my children. Made me lose the one decent,good man I loved. Now you want me to say _I love you?"_

"You do make me out to be a heartless beast don't you? But tell me honestly, are they dead. Such a beautiful, cunning konichi couldn't sense nor handle an assassin nin to the extent of casulty? And you always put your children first. Even if it isn't yours or a child, you never put yourself first. Will you tell me to my face they are dead?" Her eyes narrowed as she involentarily flinched. "Good enough answer for me."

"I hate you, you over zealous son of a bitch." I smiled. All too often I hear those words spouted, all too often have I proved them wrong. Still, if she lied why not marry me?

"Careful Kiki, your arousal is showing." She blinked and , dropping her fighting stance, looked down at her naked form. Liquid dripped down her legs. She let out a cry and went to cover herself, but I was faster since she was in such an embarassed state. I grabbed her from behind and held her close. I blew in her ear, feeling the shiver travel through her spine. "Just marry me and I'll take care of you. No worries. I don't care if you can't bare children. I don't exactly need an heir considering I'm immortal." She shook her head vigorously. "Why not." It wasn't a question, it was a demand. I tightened my grip, to the point where I planned to break a rib if she tried my patience any further.

"I know marriage. Bonded for life. To you. I won't make that commitment. If I did I wouldn't be able to break that bond because that goes against what I believe in. And you damn well know it. Did you think I would be too awestruck to not notice that power I was handing you. I may have become rusty with so many years with the windmill staaying still, but not enough so the wind won't make it creak. I'm tryingf to put this in terms you understand. Is it working or am I going too fast?" I activated the cursemark at her insolence.

I hadn't thought about that. But in reality, once married the women lose a majority of power in a conventional relationship. That detail had passed him by because this relationship seemed anything but normal. He thought back to her anology to the windmill. Oh, irony. He tried to hold back his laughter with a smirk, but it burst forward so quickly he couldn't stop. "When, why. . . Haven't you noticed at all that it seems like we're alredy married? I have most of the control already. We've had children together. We lived together. I already bound myself to you the day I gave you a curse seal, you silly little girl!" I continued my laughter.

"I am NOT a little girl." I stopped for a moment.

"No you're not." I murmured in agreement. I squeezed her breast. She slapped me. When did she get the strength to break out of my grasp? Here I thought she was rustier than that. She back away to her clothes and put them on. I frowned. "What makes you think I'm through with you?"

"I'm through. And I'm not marrying you. I'll stay, but as an unhitched woman." I grew frustrated, but paused when I heard her say something strange. "You better have not gotten me pregnant again."


	54. Drawing It Out

"Pregnant. As in with child. As in . . . pregnant." Orochimaru stood there stupified. It quickly passed as he was overcome with anger. "As in with child!?" Why he was angry was no surprise. She_ had_ exagerated the fact that she couldn't have kids. . . But that was out of protective necessity. At least he didn't know her pregnancy from before was false. Kiki was a big girl who could admit her mistakes and she just made a big one. This is where the fear crept.

The shocked expression in his face (oh how seemingly innocent) was betrayed by the radiating anger in his eyes. Raw fury. A devastating shiver ran up her spine, not the quick pass of fear that you can so stuff and squeeze into a tiny crevice, but rather the type of uneasiness that branched out. Creeping oh so quickly yet slowly in every nerve. Making a certain degree of paranoia. A devouring sense. The fact that somehow she, Kiki herself, had broken the stability of Orochimaru's mind (well the little he had in the first place) was not at all reassuring.

He laughed. A sick laugh, grating to the ears. An imaginary boundary that was set the day a twisted love bloomed was overstepped. And the repeating thought crossed her mind in such a way that it was a stuck record. Understandable gibberish. _DeathdiemenostandnotolerateendendSUFfeR._ She felt him now standing next to her, breathing down her neck, dragging his nails across her skin, inhaling her. He hadn't moved. Still in the corner he laughed. She sensed him but he hadn't moved!

He stopped abruptly and made his way towards her. Then _he_ came. "Orochimaru-sama? Their is a request to see you from some townsfolk." Orochimaru turned, completely composed.

He walked away, but not before giving a final warning. "This isn't finished. We will discuss this matter further in the future." I stared at the receding back of Orochimaru and wandered to the bare chest of one certain Kayuga.

"Konban wa." I nodded not so talkative. We stayed in an akward silence, unsaid words hanging in the air, suffocating. Finally my friend began to talk. "I will do anything for Orochimaru-sama. I owe him everything. I have grown to . . . how you say. . . enjoy your presence." I offered a weak smile, in wait of the but. "However, if you become a hinderance to my lord in any way, I will take it upon myself to dispose of you. Right now, Orochimaru-sama is. . ." Kimimaro shifted uncomfortably. A subject such as this probably had no real need to discuss before I came. "Distraught? . . . Yes, distraught. And I believe the reason is you. Fix it or else." I wanted to speak, but what would I ask was the thing. I knew what I wanted to ask, but how could I make someone else understand it?

"Kimimaro-kun? I'm not sure how well you can understand but please try to follow along." He nodded curtly, giving me all his attention. "I need to ask you a question. . . "

As I explained, his face betrayed nothing. His body gave no language. His voice was low and serious. "Even someone who worships and follows Orochimaru-sama, cannot know how he would respond to such a situation. Only he himself could decide. Maybe instead of running so much, you should turn around and fight. It won't end until you do." Gracefully, Kimimaro stood. Silently, he left. An impression of his burning passion that his last few words held hung in the air.

**Kimimaro's POV**

I walked stiffly forward. Words echoed through my head. My body felt on fire. The paths in front of me swirled together creating one narrow line, devouring itself. I know it an hallucination, yet i can't help fidget and contemplate each step. My end is nearing and I need to fix these final things to have peace in death. Kiki will not destroy Orochimaru-sama anymore. I stifled a cough. I didn't wish to draw attention to my self because it would only line me up to become a living corpse once again, strapped to a bed, hooked to a machine. If I am to die, I shall do it with dignity and grace. I won't shame Orochimaru-sama's name.

The absence of pain, when was it replaced by such a tingly feeling. It wasn't bothersome or anything like that, but it was consistant and gave such an odd sensation. I had to hold myself in reassurance. It was something I used to do when I was a child. The iron bars that taunted. The meager rations of food slipped in. The feeling of loneliness was lingering and unmeasurable. Then I met Orochimaru-sama.

I had stopped walking. When?, I wondered. I had stopped everything. I saw everything. I stared down at myself. If I was on the cold floor, why could I watch myself? Why could I watch the nin rush to assist me, if I was unconscious. I felt odd. I felt light, airy. I felt bound, trapped. I existed in oblivion. I understood nothing nor could I begin as a tug at my side pulled me away to fade from existance. Gomenasai Orochimaru-sama. I hope Kiki can fix it. I won't be able to help.

**Kiki's PoV**

The commotion I heard. I flocked amongst the crowd, pushing and slipping past to the front. I saw the body. I saw the stillness. I saw the pale skin, gleam under the light. I saw Kimimaro dead. I heard the screams and barking command break through such a surreal world. A voice holding so much confidence, that acted without hesitation. I think it was me.

I landed right beside Kimimaro and checked his vitals. There was no pulse. His chest was still. I began CPR using chakra to try and jumpstart his heart. I felt the faint tugging of a shinobi by my sleeve. I didn't bother to look. I spread my chakra into his lungs. The problem area. They were filled with blood. He had suffocated with his own blood. "We need-" The pull on my sleeve became a grasp on my arm. I turned to look into the eyes of Orochimaru.

"Leave it." It. _It_ has a name and an importance. _It_ is a person, one of the very few, whose company I honestly enjoy. "He is of no more use." I wanted to cry. Before I could make a scene, I was picked up bridal style and dragged away.

"Orochimaru I love you. Take me to your room." He shot his head up in surprise and faded into anger. "I wanna be happy. I wanna marry you. I want us to be surrounded by our own children. Please Orochimaru?" He stopped in front of his door. "When we get inside, I have a lot of explaining to do."

**A/n : Short but an update. Next chapter will be the last. But hey! I was thinking of a sequel cause now I wanna multi task.**


	55. Please Trust Me

I sat down on the bed in silence while Orochimaru chose to stand and stare. I moved my head away from his gaze, finding interest in the flickering candle light shadows. If I concentrated real hard I couldd see a story unfold on the walls. The cold was still there. The flame gave entertaining distractions, but refused to give heat. Her body reacted with slight shivers she could only hope would slip by unnoticed. They didn't.

She knew he was getting closer. The rustling of fabric was a dead give away. Her body tensed and began to panic. Her heart rate sped up, fingers clenched, her eyes shut, all in hopes of willing away the room. The existance. He stopped right in front of her. she could hear his silent breathing or rather could hear around the breathing. she wanted to hate him and blame him, but she knew in the back of her mind she wanted this!

The bed dipped with the added weight and she relaxed all-too easily into the arms of the killer behind her. He kissed her neck. "What do you want me to say?"

"All that is needed to be said."

"How cryptic you speak. So many words have gone unsaid, too many were overlooked. Somethings are better off unknown. Somethings had a time and place to say them that long passed. So you tell me what needs to be said." I was greeted by silence. I think he knows this isn't working. I think he knows we are destroying each other. We fell to hard too fast for each other. Time rushed everything along sweeping us into this hopeless stage of death. I think he knows, but he won't say it out loud. He won't accept that the natural order caught up to him and gave him a special way of death.

_I was stained in a role_

_In a day not my own_

_But as you walked into my life_

_You showed what needed to be shown_

_And I always knew what was right_

_Just didn't know that I might_

_Peel away and choose to see_

_with such a different sight_

_And I will never see the sky the same way_

_And-_

"You're singing to me? Here I never thought you would. Any particular reason?" I saw a smirk playing on his lips from the corner of my eye, but his voice held no humor.

"I love you Orochimaru." It was silent again. I wanted to sing to him before I did drastic measures. "I used my technique to look through your mind, you know." I would come clean. I would cleanse my conscience even if it hurt me or him.

"I believe I was there. It wasn't too spectacular. You only stayed for a few minutes." He began to stroke my arm. His eyes were closed and lips slightly part. The candle light illuminated his skin. I stared in that moment wanting it to never end. Wanting that picture to never fade. He looked so. . . serene and beautiful.

"Yes I only stayed a few minutes. The first time." The moment disappeared without an interval. His eyes snapped opened and the cold in them directed itself to me. "When we first slept together. I fell asleep and then woke up not half an hour passed. You were already asleep. I searched your mind then." I swallowed wondering when my throat went so dry. I licked my lips stalling the openning of the next can of worms. "You lied."

He stayed in that comforting position only for a few seconds more. He sat up and turned me over so I could lay on my back. It made it easier to sit on my stomach and wrap his calloused hands around my neck. I took a minute to wonder if it was his hands that were so rough or his vessels. Had his form taken over yet? Completely I mean. I didn't move or struggle. He had a right to be angry and I think he could see the sadness in my eyes. The sadness directed at him and hated me for it. "What, pray tell, did I lie about?"

I looked up at his dominating figure. I looked at the emotions of anger and frustration dancing along his eyes and face. As sickening as it was to say about a man who was on the verge of killing me at the moment, I became aroused. I had the urge to run my hand through his hair, to kiss those warm lips, to give myself to him fully. I never took the time to look or notice him. I spent it looking for someone who could replace him. Someone who wasn't unhealthy for me. I regretted it now. "Your parents."

All that time ago, what was he had said about his parents? They were weak and foolish. His mother died in child birth. His father was killed by rouge ninja. "Your parents were strong, dependable shinobi. Both of them. They died together in a war. You never thought them foolish, nor did you scorn them. You visited your parents everyday and gave them flowers and food. you wanted to see them again, to feel that warmth of a family. You wanted to see if they saw you." She couldn't speak anymore. Orochimaru's hands tightened with every word she spoke.

His quiet whispers turned to screams of outrage. "You had no right. You had no right! YOU HAD NO MOTHER-FUCKING RIGHT!" His wounds, his pains, if he lied about them enough, it would become true. If he didn't care enough it wouldn't matter. If he stopped remembering it wouldn't matter. She broke all the defenses away by ripping open his oldest, most infected wound and forcing salt into it. I looked away in shame. I had no right.

He stopped. Anger and killing intent merging into one orgy. "What else!?" Let's see. You gave me some sort of mental condition that makes me a bit masochistic? Nah, he wouldn't wanna hear about that. Come clean. Cleanse. I took deep, straggled breaths.

"The baby I was going to have. When I killed it, I didn't kill it." My hands reached for my neck to rub the soreness away, but he still had his hands gently locked together for the awaiting anger.

"So . . . you're still pregnant?" A smile or attempt flashed across his face and his grip loosened and began to move away. I stopped his hands. In retrospect that was a sincerely stupid thing to do, but I felt like letting his anger fade on false hope was a sort of betrayal.

"That's not what I meant. I meant the baby was already dead. It was going to be a stillborn." His fists clenched and eyebrows furrowed as he tried to reason and understand my logic.

"And you assumed if I knew. . . I would find you defective and cast you aside like so many others? I didn't need an heir. I could have worked with the children we had. We -" I pushed my hand over his mouth. I tried to calm myself down. I did NOT want to to cry infront of him."

"You're drawing conclusions. I put on an act of destroying my own baby. Of destroying my own body to find a way out. Don't you see!? I've been trying for so long to find a way out. A way away from you. I don't know what I want. I want simplicity. I want serenity. I want security. You are destruction, devastation, disregard and yet I dream of you! Too often. Your memory burnt itself into my mind. Like a brand that won't let me move on. I don't even know myself anymore! Out. I need an out. But I need you. . ."

Many people drifted through my mind. Rei, Iro, Hebi, Doneko, Li-Li, Mimiko, James, Croatoan, Sakura, Okaasan, Otousan, Hinamizawa villagers. Kimimaro in paticular. I couldn't fit them through my out. The makeshift door would immediately collapse. Maybe others would be left behind. Maybe he out will trap herself in despair. Maybe.

_"Kimimaro-kun? I'm not sure how well you can understand but please try to follow along." He nodded curtly, giving me all his attention. "I need to ask you a question. . . " I paused. How could I be confident in asking this. If anything, it pains me to ask. "If I could make Orochimaru's pain disappear, should I? There are certain. . . "_

_"You would not ask such questions that the answers would be obvious unless there is an under lying threat. If you want my opinion I need to know the whole picture." My mouth formed the words but my voice caught. I liked Kimimaro. It wasn't fair to put Orochimaru above him. "I will not hate you for whatever you have to say."_

_That helped a little. "What if, what I would do would cause Orochimaru happiness at the cost of your own." I saw the lack of understanding and continued shakily. "What if I made so Orochimaru ended up not saving you from that loneliness. He never came to the Mist Village, he never saw you. His goals would be different. His obsession with immortality and jutsus would be gone. All the good. All the bad. He would be on a different path. This is my way out."_

_"I. . . Are you asking if I would give up my purpose to help Orochimaru-sama?"_

_"Yes. That and how would it change Orochimaru. Did you make a significant impact on his life that changed him somehow?"_

_As I explained, his face betrayed nothing. His body gave no language. His voice was low and serious. "Even someone who worships and follows Orochimaru-sama, cannot know how he would respond to such a situation. Only he himself could decide. Maybe instead of running so much, you should turn around and fight. It won't end until you do."_

Was it my way out that he considered to be running away? Now that Kimimaro was dead I couldn't ask him. I couldn't ask him. Yet I still could destroy him. I shuddered at the thought. "Orochimaru, if there was a way for us. . . a way out, where we, where." I couldn't process the thought and feeling into proper words. "If I could have I way out and a way with you, would you let me take it would you trust me enough?" My words made no sense to him. How could they? "Do you trust me?"

I sat up, holding onto his hands. I scooched my legs out from under him and sat down in a comfortable positon to face what I wanted in my past, present, and future. I looked into his eyes with a pleading desperation. "Yes." I smiled a flimsy smile, but at least it was real.

"Close your eyes." He gave me a kiss on the mouth it was short, yet lingering. "Trust me." I whispered into his ear as the knife I hid plunged deep into his heart. It came out a heated whisper. I gave one last look into his eyes. They were confusion and anger. No hate. I kissed his lips one last time.

"My death. I knew it when I first made you my prisoner." Those were his last words. Until the new life. I took the blood on my hand and spread it on the floor in a circular pattern. Pagan designs decorated the inside of it. Pagan was not devil. Pagan was the gods of all elements. I quietly worked, taking my time. I knew once I finished no one would be able to do anything.

_The favors you owe_

_The pain I've caused_

_The outing I seek_

_Erase the loss_

_Memories I hold_

_I shall keep_

_To undo the damage_

_Of sowing what was reaped_

The circle glowed and enveleoped me. This wasn't our end this was a beginning. I smiled as the darkness devoured. The color, the scents, the world vanished. It all mixed into a void of emptiness. Voices spoke out loud to protest and question her.

_Why?_

_Is it worth it?_

_What are the costs?_

_This is what should be left alone._

_What of the family? Sister? Brother? They'll will notice._

"Stop." The voices stopped. The voices. The existance of my doubt. My own weaknesses trying to devour me. I wouldn't let it be simply because I will drag others through the door. I will meddle and fix it. I will live with the consequences. Screw God and his ideals. I will do something for me. I will exist!

The darkness receded and faded away to the blinding light devouring the void. She was cocooned in warmth. Security. Safety. The light was protection. The light would guide her. There was no doubt. There was no fear. All emotions, possessions, worries, responsibilities drained away to create a state of Nirvana. And she was happy.

* * *

**A/N: The way I left this story, I need to make a sequel. Here is a final chapter. I hope you enjoyed this fic. I hope things are clarified. If a loose ending stands, tell me about it and I'll be fixing it. And I realize this might leave you with a lot of answered questions. Sorry. I'll post a sequel soon. I like this last chapter. It officially my favorite.**


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